AND for those who have never had something precious taken from them, you can’t understand.
Stand a day in those shoes…
If OP is potentially ‘Hanosaurus’, then it seems that she already told herself to get things in writing first; see ‘People Suck’ forum.
One thing I’m questioning is did you even have a sale contact in the first place? If you did it is simply common sense to put all agreements and conditions within it. If you don’t then thats boo-on-you; maybe this’ll be the last time you need to learn the advantage of a contract.
Here is an example, I sold my horse to a good friend of my. I added in a FRR with a stipulation that said I can purchase the horse back in said case for $XXXX, which also happened to be what I was selling him to her. There were also some other stipulations, because well, I’m crazy. Did my friend I was selling my horse to love it? No. Did I care? No. Business, no matter who you’re dealing with is still business.
[QUOTE=Nootka;8754341]
FROR doesn’t = buy back horse for what you sold it for.
It just means they offer the horse for what they think it is worth. You said earlier that you didn’t sell her for 5k. That fact isn’t important.
The only lesson learned here is … don’t sell if you want to make decisions in the horse’s care. The moment you sold her… is the moment that you gave up control no matter what really happened.
Heart horse (or horse of a lifetime/soul mate/…/…) = don’t sell[/QUOTE]
I hear you. And I miss the horse dearly. I’ve owned several horses, and this was one that really touched my soul. And I realize that I have made a horrible mistake and there is NOTHING I can do about it…
And there are those who you all don’t know who really are happy that the horse was manipulated from me. Eventually my grief and pain will subside and I look forward to the day that Karma will take care of this.
[QUOTE=Obiwan;8754452]
If OP is potentially ‘Hanosaurus’, then it seems that she already told herself to get things in writing first; see ‘People Suck’ forum.
One thing I’m questioning is did you even have a sale contact in the first place? If you did it is simply common sense to put all agreements and conditions within it. If you don’t then thats boo-on-you; maybe this’ll be the last time you need to learn the advantage of a contract.
Here is an example, I sold my horse to a good friend of my. I added in a FRR with a stipulation that said I can purchase the horse back in said case for $XXXX, which also happened to be what I was selling him to her. There were also some other stipulations, because well, I’m crazy. Did my friend I was selling my horse to love it? No. Did I care? No. Business, no matter who you’re dealing with is still business.[/QUOTE]
Yeah I know. BOO on me for trusting people… never again…
[QUOTE=scstables2;8754448]
AND for those who have never had something precious taken from them, you can’t understand.
Stand a day in those shoes…[/QUOTE]
I’d wager a fair sum that the majority of people posting here have experienced a significant loss or two in their existence on this plane.
Perhaps that’s why so many have offered the advice to let go of it and move forward.
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Taken from you?
I thought you sold the horse.
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[QUOTE=scstables2;8754457]
I hear you. And I miss the horse dearly. I’ve owned several horses, and this was one that really touched my soul. And I realize that I have made a horrible mistake and there is NOTHING I can do about it…
And there are those who you all don’t know who really are happy that the horse was manipulated from me. Eventually my grief and pain will subside and I look forward to the day that Karma will take care of this.[/QUOTE]
I’m starting to see how bitter you really are.
you know, the horse is still alive. I get that you are torn up but your choices led to this.
I don’t think you will survive horses much if you get this bent out of shape and can’t take responsibility for your own actions.
I wager that most of us here have had worse thins done TO US and major sucktastic events.
I don’t think it’s a proper use of “karma” to keep wishing the bad version on other people…
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[QUOTE=vxf111;8754509]
I don’t think it’s a proper use of “karma” to keep wishing the bad version on other people…[/QUOTE]
right, what if the new owners actually “did the right thing”? who knows.
There is just a lot of anger and hostility here-- if you ask me—?
Your horse was not taken from you.
Your horse was not manipulated from you.
You sold your horse. Be sad/mad at yourself. There is no karma due the new owners. The only karma here is that you posted a sob story expecting sympathy and then got told the harsh truth instead. THAT’S karma.
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[QUOTE=scstables2;8754448]
AND for those who have never had something precious taken from them, you can’t understand.
Stand a day in those shoes…[/QUOTE]
Oh stop it already! You just pole-vaulted right over the damn line!
No one here has ever had a beloved, precious horse/cat/dog/SPOUSE/PARENT/CHILD “taken from them”? Your former horse isn’t DEAD! You SOLD HER!
Go get yourself some therapy to help you develop a little perspective and get over this idea that suffering disappointment is somehow unique to you and yours.
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It doesn’t matter if you sold your horse for $1 or $1M … You still SOLD it and the new owners can do what they want with THEIR horse! As soon as the money changed hands you entered into a legally binding contract… End of story!
Oh and for your information, probably everyone has suffered a devastating loss and we have to get past it and get on with our lives. I’ve lost family members in a well known horrific plane bombing… There… That bad enough for you! Op, you really sound like a piece of work!
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[QUOTE=Mara;8754588]
Oh stop it already! You just pole-vaulted right over the damn line!
No one here has ever had a beloved, precious horse/cat/dog/SPOUSE/PARENT/CHILD “taken from them”? Your former horse isn’t DEAD! You SOLD HER!
Go get yourself some therapy to help you develop a little perspective.[/QUOTE]
Yes-
When you had a horse suddenly go neurological and die on you after stumbling and falling… then let’s talk about PTSD and trauma.
Get over it. really! you DID THIS to yourself.
I was able to buy a new horse and move on, can you?
[QUOTE=scstables2;8754457]
I hear you. And I miss the horse dearly. I’ve owned several horses, and this was one that really touched my soul. And I realize that I have made a horrible mistake and there is NOTHING I can do about it…
And there are those who you all don’t know who really are happy that the horse was manipulated from me. Eventually my grief and pain will subside and I look forward to the day that Karma will take care of this.[/QUOTE]
That’s very compassionate and religiously minded of you 
Mankind is in a sorry state these days, and hopefully the Grace of God will eventually descend down one day to wipe away all the evil that is present in this world.(…) With God all things are possible.
It’s always kinda hilarious when people who go on about Grace of God and empathy and compassion and suffering turn around and in the next breath hope for bad stuff to happen to others. I mean, wish bad stuff on her all you want, just leave poor God out of all this ill-wishing.
Karma also explains the bad stuff that happens to you, as a consequence of your own bad intent or action. So if you lost your beloved mare, perhaps that was karmic retribution for something you’ve done? Instead of ill-wishing others (which could be bad intent, and thus lead to bad karma), if you actually believe in the concept of karma you should look to your past to figure out why bad stuff is happening.
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You sold your horse rather than lease out because in your own words you did not want to take the chance of her coming back lame.
Still- Your verbal FRR was honored and you were given an opportunity to buy her back for 5 K.
since you have never answered the question of how much you sold the horse for- I will guess it was not far off that price
No matter- if no price was agreed upon re FRF- then your option is to meet whAT another buyer was willing to pay
You could not come up with 5 k.
So why aRE you here ranting. This is crazy stuff
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I suspect that the CotH crowd would be a little more sympathetic if the OP took responsibility and was realistic about what happened. Saying something like “Selling Horsie was the right financial decision at the time, but I really liked that horse and it sucks that I can’t afford to buy it back now that it’s for sale again.” makes me want to respond with something vaguely comforting.
The shitstorm of wild accusations, insults, and ill-wishing directed at the person who actually was kind enough to honor a verbal agreement are mind-boggling, though. My only advice at this point is to leave the mare’s current owner and the person who bought the mare from you alone. Nothing good can come of harassing them.
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[QUOTE=scstables2;8754448]
AND for those who have never had something precious taken from them, you can’t understand.
Stand a day in those shoes…[/QUOTE]
I’ve lost my best horse, best dog, both parents, and a few very dear relatives and friends over the years. You are not a unique, special, precious butterfly.
Everyone has grief, heartache and disappointments in life, but not everyone refuses to admit their own shortcomings and wish dire consequences on others because things didn’t go their way.
You need therapy, not this horse back.
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[QUOTE=arabhorse2;8754942]
I’ve lost my best horse, best dog, both parents, and a few very dear relatives and friends over the years. You are not a unique, special, precious butterfly.
Everyone has grief, heartache and disappointments in life, but not everyone refuses to admit their own shortcomings and wish dire consequences on others because things didn’t go their way.
You need therapy, not this horse back.[/QUOTE]
Agree ^^ I’ve lost a 32yr sister, my 6yr old son and other people in my life. A horse that is alive and in another’s hands… really isn’t the end of the world
ETA: I sold my nice mare (Nootka) with a breeding clause. That person sold her and now I’m SOL. Oh… well, life moves on and I knew it might happen. I don’t dwell on it and this is the first time I have even mentioned it on this board. Such is life :o
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Honestly, I took on a horse from an owner that loved him dearly. She thought she looked after him better than anyone else in the world. I thought he was in a a bit of a state and could probably sort him out and he would do a job for me.
I’m in the UK so we call it loaning but I think its the same as free leasing in the US. She didnt want to do that. What she wanted was for me to buy him but continue to look after him exactly as she did while she had input.
I took him away and managed to get him sorted but it took 18 months of very hard work to get him right. She screamed and shouted and threatened me. When all this initially started about 6 weeks into me owning him, I threw my hands up and offered him back to her at what he had cost me to purchase plus the vets fees etc, so cost.
She didnt want to do that. She wanted him back for free, plus all the tack and rugs thrown in. I told her to do one!
2.5yrs down the line the incredibly fat, sore, lame horse is slim, sound and competing at a low level with his new rider, who I DID give him to for free as she was the right person for him.
Sometimes you think you are the very very, very best person for a horse and no one else can possibly manage them, but actually you really arent!
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[QUOTE=scstables2;8754219]
A written agreement would have specified the money to be returned in the situation if the horse did not work out for her. So thus, since there was not one, room for her to choose any buyer by jacking up the price so high that I could not afford the price… people do these things you know :([/QUOTE]
Right of first refusal doesn’t necessarily mean you just give the money back and get the horse for that same amount. Generally, it means that the horse is offered to you first at the current market value…and that can change with training, inflation, etc. I don’t know of any buyer who would ever agree to the term you put forward , i.e. ROFR at same cost. Heck, that could work against the seller–what if the horse got hurt and was worth nothing on the open market?
People might “do those things.” Or, people might buy a horse, fulfill the original oral agreement by offering back to seller at current market value, and then sell the horse for what it’s worth to a buyer who can afford it. IMHO, no horse buyer in his or her right mind would agree to your terms of “just return the money and get the horse back if you ever don’t want to keep it.” I’d run from that deal as fast as I could, personally, though I’d be happy to sign ROFR for market value of the horse when I choose to sell it.
In most states, ROFR is not legally binding in the way most people think it is, even if it’s in writing. You can’t sue to get the horse back for not following ROFR as someone else owns the horse. IIRC, in most places, it’s legally worthless unless there is an actual monetary penalty attached (i.e. if buyer does not offer to seller first at the sale price they as the new seller determine, they must pay a penalty of $XXX). The seller could go to court and contest the ROFR and get paid $XXX if the contract stipulates, but they do NOT get the horse. If they are offered the horse for whatever price the new seller wants to charge, they have zero leg to stand on legally. YMMV, but that’s how I understand it works in most places.
OP, I’m sorry you had to sell your horse; it sucks. But you have no idea that the horse is in any way being abused or neglected. Perhaps the new owner has had their vet examine the horse and discovered your vet misdiagnosed or that the diagnosis has changed. It happens. Just because they’re following their vet’s advice and not yours does not mean the horse in being neglected.
You need to let this one go. You were not “taken” in any way unless there’s something you have not told us. You sold horse with ROFR that did not specify a resale price or monetary penalty. You were offered horse back on new seller’s terms, which you did not accept. The new seller is now free to sell to whomever they please at whatever price that person is willing to pay.
I understand that you are sad you could not get the horse back. I’ve been there int eh same situation (in fact was offered ROFR at a lower price than I’d sold the horse for originally) and could not take the horse back either. She was my first horse and I still think of her often…but when I accepted the check, I also accepted that she was no longer my horse.
Find a good horse rescue near you and volunteer–most need people and would be happy to work with you as long as you follow their rules and are genuinely helpful. Go snuggle some horses who really have slipped through the cracks and be thankful your former mare was not one of those.
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