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Annoying self identified dressage person at work

Dressage
#21

[QUOTE=emipou;7697768]
I was sincerely touched when a coworker whose only affiliation with horses was that he grew up in Texas, drove 2 hours to come watch me in my first schooling show. Intro a, b, c. I tried to tell him how boring it would be but he came all the way out anyway. :)[/QUOTE]

Are you young , pretty and single? :wink:

And for the rest of you—Dressage is a mental exercise, and yes you are expected to focus. Actually if you do it long enough, your body takes over a lot automatically, freeing your brain to plan even further ahead. Until a moment of panic! I’m riding which test? :lol: :lol:

But I will agree that the self appointed Grand Masters are tough to take without a grin on your face.

#22

I for one like to listen to people talk about their passion(horses)! Sometimes it’s just nice for another person to tell someone how special and good their critters are,even if they aren’t.It doesn’t take much to make another person happy even for a few moments of your time.

#23

I know, I know. I’m coming off kinda beyotchy based on if we’d had just one intro conversation. It was when a non horse person asked about my upcoming show and she radar-eared the conversation, came over and interrupted to tell us what she had done with her horses over the weekend that I went from bemused to irritated at her total self focus.
I do hope to find a group of fun dressage riders when I start taking lessons again. I loved my instructor and hope she has room in her program.

#24

[QUOTE=myrna;7697886]
Sometimes it’s just nice for another person to tell someone how special and good their critters are,even if they aren’t.[/QUOTE]

Aw, but to that person, the critter is! But I agree with your sentiment, be kind.

#25

Yeah it was a bitchy remark…I actually don’t discuss my riding all that much with anyone but my trainer. I do get “lessons” occasionally from her other students on the sidelines at shows…I tell them I am all set I have a trainer thank you very much.
I teach and train some but I don’t try to go on and on about myself…I must be a bad example of a dressage rider:lol: Sorry OP.

I did just take up golf again and what I like about golf is it’s just as tedious as dressage when it comes to you position and the effect on the horse or ability to hit a golf ball…do you want to discuss that?:smiley:

#26

No. No. and No.

My coworker showed up before my mom or my husband. So there ya go!

And yes - I yearn for that feeling when the horse and I are in the zone. I have this perfect vision in my head. I’m spacing out, into the ride. Totally aware and totally automated all at once. All I can see are two fuzzy, fuzzy ears and arena between them and it feels SO good. :slight_smile:

#27

[QUOTE=JBD;7697888]
I know, I know. I’m coming off kinda beyotchy based on if we’d had just one intro conversation. It was when a non horse person asked about my upcoming show and she radar-eared the conversation, came over and interrupted to tell us what she had done with her horses over the weekend that I went from bemused to irritated at her total self focus.
I do hope to find a group of fun dressage riders when I start taking lessons again. I loved my instructor and hope she has room in her program.[/QUOTE]

I wish you had stated that in your OP.

#28

Re fellow BOARDERS, etc. commenting at shows or when you are schooling, there are cases, of course, when it’s fine: There’s one gal at our barn, who, like me, is a former eventer, and who is presently schooling 4th level (and just did her first show at that level). I’m working on 2nd/3rd level. She is inclined to yell to me when she thinks I’m getting out of position, or not asking enough, etc., but right from the beginning she said to me, “Tell me to shut up if it’s none of my business, and feel free to yell at me if I’m doing something wrong.” While her comments were not initially asked for, they were on point, and I respect her level of knowledge, so it’s helpful and I told her to feel free to say things if she thinks things are going wrong.

#29

Did she state that she is a superior rider to you? If not, it seems like you have an inner dialog going that is kind of unfair. You’re assuming she is thinking or feeling things that she might not even be CLOSE to thinking or feeling. She might have just been excited to share about her horse with someone that would understand. Perhaps she has no idea you were offended or thought she was bragging…??

I say just be happy there is horse water cooler talk. My poor work mates are probably so sick of hearing my horses name and I think they all just glaze over when I mention it. It would be lovely to have another horse person around!

#30

[QUOTE=rockfordbuckeye;7698167]
Did she state that she is a superior rider to you? If not, it seems like you have an inner dialog going that is kind of unfair. You’re assuming she is thinking or feeling things that she might not even be CLOSE to thinking or feeling. She might have just been excited to share about her horse with someone that would understand. Perhaps she has no idea you were offended or thought she was bragging…??

I say just be happy there is horse water cooler talk. My poor work mates are probably so sick of hearing my horses name and I think they all just glaze over when I mention it. It would be lovely to have another horse person around![/QUOTE]
I think you’re correct that I may have projected things in a way that wouldn’t have happened if she was self absorbed about a non-horsey topic. It still wouldn’t have been a conversation(s) I wanted to repeat as it really was a monologue and not a hey let’s talk about our common interests. But there are bad listeners everywhere including me on occasion.

#31

OP, From your first paragraph I was sure that I was that annoying dressage person at work. I will talk about it to anyone who will listen.

But then I realized that it can’t be me. I don’t know any Arabian or western people at work. Or maybe I do. I wasn’t listening anyway.

#32

[QUOTE=JBD;7697391]
I may be wrong but I’ve seen (heard) more assumption of superiority from dressage wanna-bes than I ever heard in other disciplines. As I plan to return my hunter to dressage lessons and shows, I dread dealing with these kind of people. I love to ride and show but have definitely enjoyed the camaraderie of my Arabian show barn more than the dressage barns where I took lessons previously.

I guess I’ll mind my own business and try to avoid big talkers but it does take some of the joy out of returning to dressage.[/QUOTE]

I don’t know where you are located, but in Region XII (TN, NC, SC, GA, Fl, AL, MS)
there are a lot of Arabian sport horse shows, with Sport Horse in Hand, Sport Horse under Saddle, Working Hunter, and Dressage. Many, many people who once did Halter and Pleasure are now doing the Sport Horse shows instead.

#33

The things you feel when she talks about her horses and Dressage are what most non-horse people feel when a horse person (like you, and I and everyone on this board) goes on and on about their horses.

Have you considered that there might be people in your office that are saying the same things about you and her and that’s why they shoved you together?

Food for thought.

#34

Funny, but my experience has been exactly the opposite.
At my dressage barn I’ve found a community of people who truly care about their horses’ well being and happiness in their work, and who truly love to learn about how to ride their horse better and progress in partnership. They’ve been nothing but welcoming of me and my 3 crazy ay-rabs.

When I used to show the arab circuit, most of the people I encountered were more concerned with winning, and with show ring politics, and with keeping up with the latest fashion of gait or tack. Riding well and accomplishing something significant with your happy horse was less of a priority.

I don’t think all arab barns are that way, but most of the ones I encountered were, and it sure spoiled the show experience.

#35

[QUOTE=JBD;7698220]
I think you’re correct that I may have projected things in a way that wouldn’t have happened if she was self absorbed about a non-horsey topic. It still wouldn’t have been a conversation(s) I wanted to repeat as it really was a monologue and not a hey let’s talk about our common interests. But there are bad listeners everywhere including me on occasion.[/QUOTE]

Well she might have just gotten so excited that there was finally a person at work that would understand her that she kind of spewed horse info. that was bottled up inside. From time to time we all get so excited about something that we kind of blast it out at someone else and ignore them (not meaning too). It’s just good natured enthusiasm. Think of children and how they communicate :wink:

#36

I’m not sure who was the self-absorbed one in the office, but I will say it’s kind of in poor taste to come to a dressage forum and tell the members how dressage riders are the most intolerable horse people around based on a sample size of 1.

#37

[QUOTE=netg;7698519]
I’m not sure who was the self-absorbed one in the office, but I will say it’s kind of in poor taste to come to a dressage forum and tell the members how dressage riders are the most intolerable horse people around based on a sample size of 1.[/QUOTE]

Read my posts again please. I’ve taken lessons at a dressage barn for a couple years as well as shown schooling and a couple rated shows. But if you’d like me to add you to the sample size, consider it done

#38

Nah, I think the hunter and Arab people would miss you too much. We’ll let them keep you.

#39

[QUOTE=Scandias;7697843]
Oh God! I’m the annoying Dressage person at work. I must go hide under my desk now.[/QUOTE]

LOL! After these responses, I think the OP is most like hiding under the proverbial :lol: rock! :slight_smile:

#40

[QUOTE=Winding Down;7698835]
LOL! After these responses, I think the OP is most like hiding under the proverbial :lol: rock! :)[/QUOTE]

Not hardly, I’m not particularly sensitive to Internet pile ons. Plus I been on COTH long enough to know that this is mild. It would be fun to continue prodding the DQs who have responded negatively but I’d rather spend my time more positively and productively

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