I would look at Montgomery County first, because it’s going to be closer, and then Baltimore County (north of Baltimore City) if you’d do a longer commute - rush hour is going to be closer to 2 hours. Baltimore County is cheaper than Montgomery County and has a very diverse mix of things - you can horse show, event, fox hunt basically anything you want within a 15 min drive.
Also - BaCo has the NCR trail, Gunpowder falls and Patapsco State Park nearby which are great for running/biking/whatever
I’ve commuted to the Navy Yard for 15 years from northern PW county. It’s not terrible. The Navy Yard is more or less on the east side of DC. The drive from Loudon or Fauquier is an absolute bitch. I66 is under major construction and is waayyy worse than I95.
Unfortunately, covid mostly killed slugging (carpooling with strangers; it’s a DC thing). That made the express lanes free. If you can afford the tolls in VA, the express lanes on 95 are great. The toll for the entire length can reach $30 or $40 easily - this is the cost ONE WAY.
There’s a good amount of construction on I95 around Fredericksburg, but it’s not awful. Most of the southbound work is done, and northbound is coming along.
I can’t speak much to the H/J scene; I drive 2-4 hours south to a saddlebred barn.
I’m in southern PA (very nearly Baltimore county) and on a clear Sunday morning at 4am I could get to the Navy Yard in 2 hours. It’s a drive I dread. So unpredictable. 2 hours could be 4, Baltimore traffic is a real thing and so is DC, double jeopardy. Lots of good suggestions here. Poolesville area is lovely. Not so familiar with some other eastern MD suggestions. Agree getting out 66…also a nightmare. Good luck with your move.
As I read all of these comments and also think about things…OP - I really think you should focus on the Fredericksburg area and the Manassas area (both outer Virginia suburbs). Both of those areas should be convenient for horsey stuff for you and trailrunning outdoorsy stuff for him. Additionally, the VRE trains run from both those areas to L’Enfant Plaza in DC - from there it should be a quick trip on the metro green line to the Navy Yard.
If you end up in Loudoun County, check out the Ashburn Area Running Club (AARC). We are a really fun group of runners, ranging from casual runners to Boston qualifiers, competitive triathletes, etc.
The W&OD is a trail from Falls Church to Purcellville. I love my running routes in western Loudoun.
What are some good FB groups for AACO area ?
Southern Maryland Horse Network and Anne Arundel Horse Network are most active 
Thanks. I sent in membership request for both.
Chipping in with trail running info. I used to live in the Poolesville/Boyds, MD area, worked in horses, was a runner off and on. Within a 15 minute drive of where I lived, I had access to the C&O Canal, Little Bennet Park, the Seneca Greenway, the Seneca Ridge trail, Hoyles Mill trail, Ten Mile Creek, Black Hills Park, and whatever they call the chaos out the back of the Germantown Soccerplex. Many of those link to each other. For example, you could do Black Hills -> Hoyles Mill -> Soccerplex -> Seneca Ridge -> Seneca Greenway -> C&O… Is 200 miles enough for him? 
MCRRC (the local running club) is very active, and the running store in the Kentlands is great.
I now live in Prince George’s County, and there are some good trail options (Rosaryville, Jug Bay, Governor’s Bridge, Merkle) but definitely fewer choices. The local running scene seems to be more focused in DC proper or in Annapolis. PG would be the better commute to Navy Yard but for once a week both locations are completely viable.
Renting in this area is costly too. A 2-hour commute is not necessarily the right way to phrase it around here, sadly. For example, I live in Mont Co Maryland, commuted to work in Tysons Corner Va. morning commute = 30-45 minutes, afternoon commute would normally be 1 - 1.5 hours regularly and sometimes 2. Get into bad winter and you may as well book a hotel room it can and has been that bad sometimes
To make SO’s life easier, you should probably consider an area when they could take the subway or train. Not sure why SO didn’t like the area of Maryland - Montgomery Co/Frederick Co./Howard Co offers many choices for boarding options - Plenty of eventing, dressage and H/J barns. Many will require some sort of lesson/training program.
In my experience, there is running and trails and nature access everywhere in the DC area (I’ve lived in Arlington, Alexandria, NW DC, and in two different places in MD). I don’t see how finding human trails could possibility be any sort of a problem. As stupid as it sounds, Arlington and DC aren’t two of the fittest cities in America for nothin’!
I’m retiring (early) and moving from Texas to either Maryland or Virginia. I have family in both states. I am having a terrible time finding out if there are communities similar to those in Aiken where homes have acreage and horses can be kept at home. For me a tremendous upside to these communities is that they often have miles and miles of community trails. There’s always the chance that I’m putting in the wrong search criteria, but does anyone know of such communities in either Maryland or Virginia? I VERY MUCH appreciate your help.
I believe there used to be but they are mostly gone now, developers bought them up. And unfortunately, ride out is becoming an issue in both northern Virginia and Maryland. We keep loosing trails and farmland. Are you looking specifically for properties that would have good trail riding, or are you looking more for an equestrian community feel?
Not that I’m aware of. Best thing is to live near a nice farm and pay occasionally to use their facilities.
Most of the horse communities have been purchased and crowded with homes. You really need a truck and trailer here for ride out.
Southern MD or closer to Annapolis.
Loudon County (Middleburg, Upperville, Morven Park, hunting, polo, etc.) is gorgeous if you can afford it. DC officially has the best urban park system in the United States. I live in the woods, literally, in Northwest DC. The city. You can go on an hour-long horse trail ride in Rock Creek Park (in DC). Humans can run, walk, hike for miles and miles and miles and get lost in the woods in the city. I ride in Maryland, many trails on the farm and nearby. Look at the real estate and see what’s available. The challenge will be money, for most people, not lack of access to nature.
the only true horse community I know of is merry-go-round farm in Potomac. https://www.merrygoroundfarm.com/default.php
I think you can ride out along the Potomac river from the place. other than that, riding out is limited. It’s not nearly as large as communities in Aiken. more like gated community for horses and some pricy houses. I board in Boyds md which is a 35 min commute from my home in bethesda. Tony Koerber in Maryland and Snowden Clarke ( a wonderfully charming hunter trainer and real estate person) are both horse farm real estate agents. They would know what’s out there. What everyone above says about trails is correct- they are all over the place (at least in Md and DC, I don’t know Va as well) and well maintained. Also correct is that land has been swallowed up by developments. I have a gf who has a 50 acre farm in Lexington, va. She always seems to have a friend to ride her property with, or they can trailer out, but most of the surrounding farms won’t allow horses. My barn is across from a state park w tons of trails. There are trail riding orgs (TROT, trail riders of today and sugarloaf riding club in md ), so if you can trailer, they are def a community and do lot of rides. TROT has a fb page and you might query them. Although I think you have to join trot first.
There may not be “community” trails the way that you are thinking, but some of the prime foxhunting areas in MD and VA have well established networks of adjoining properties that can be great for hacking out - with permission from private land owners, of course. Many clubs help maintain trails, gates and jumps throughout their fixtures. Even if you are not into Foxhunting, that might be a good place to start networking.
Many thanks for that reply. This “hunt” I’m on is getting more and more encouraging thanks to the responses I’m getting from you all. Seriously appreciate them!!
Just coming to +1 the fact that there aren’t horse-specific developments in this area like there are in Aiken, but the first thing I thought was “3Grays needs to put themself smack in the middle of hunt territory.” If you want the feeling of being in an equine-centered community with an extensive trail network, I’d start with Middleburg and Upperville. The challenge, as others have noted, is budget.
I’m not as familiar with Maryland so won’t speak to that side of the border.
Good luck with your hunt!
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