BOs: advice for new self care boarder

[Wanderosa]

@ReSomething

I must be a horrific slob as I rarely dump and scrub buckets. Just never learned to do it. Partly because they don’t get algae when inside the stall. I do it about every fifth filling but I do dump small amounts, swipe out hay and fermentables, just no honest to God scrubbing. Troughs are a little different as they get nasty and mine are big so always had to weigh tipping out 20 gallons versus was it green enough I wouldn’t drink out of it myself.
The neighbors horses can drink out of ponds or troughs and use both, but I have never checked the “bloom” in the ponds when they are using the trough.

At 17 she probably just doesn’t know depending on the standard of care where she was and who did the work, but I had an exchange student that finally got the sharp edge of my tongue as she was a walking disaster. If you have a standard of care spell it out, have her show you what she thinks you mean (that’s from the exchange student), and give her six weeks so you can evict her to save your sanity.

It depends. Some horses slop grain into their water buckets as they eat. In the VA summer it starts to ferment into beer. I eyeball the buckets & may dump and scrub daily depending on the individual horse. Otherwise, I do it every 2-3 days. I could see pushing the intervals further out if you live in a drought prone area.

Dropped my kids off to help at pony camp the other week and stayed for a bit to lend another adult hand. The buckets were so disgusting I went nuts and dumped and scrubbed them and scrubbed a feed tub belonging to a senior horse that gets textured feed with molasses. The feed tub was so caked that there were 100s of flies. And these are decent BO’s and boarders in other regards. They’ve just always been together and never ridden or boarded anywhere else and thus have no basis for comparison.

[Ruth0552]

Is her horse sharing space with your horses or your other borders horses? Or is her lack of cleaning only affecting her horse? (still not ok)

I think you can just tell her the water buckets were disgusting and the expectation for self-care is that not only are stalls done regularly but that water buckets are also dumped/scrubbed regularly. You can edit your contract for the future and you can make a checklist if you want but I think there is zero problem with just telling her outright that water buckets need to be cleaned regularly. As well as anything else she might be slacking on- frankly if one more border at my barn leaves poop in the outdoor wash stall or the arena I might scream. If she doesn’t like it, she can leave.

[Sansena]

“…<snip>…frankly if one more border at my barn leaves poop in the outdoor wash stall or the arena I might scream…<snip>…”

Right there with you. I have NEVER understood where this sense of entitlement originates. It also infuriates me that people leave crap of all kinds wherever it drops. Makes me wonder how they keep their houses. Of course, these are likely the types of pay to have someone come in twice weekly to clean up after them. That is NOT included in the cost of board and should also be stated up front.

[trubandloki]

I am willing to guess that this might be a case of someone who simply does not know any better versus someone who is just plain lazy. If you have time why not take it as an opportunity to educate them. It is obvious to those of us who have been around the block a few times that a water bucket with grain in it is going to get gross very quickly, but might not be obvious to others.

I agree that you have to tighten up your contract to include all of these things that really matter to you.

I would not want to be in the stall next to a horse that has their stall only cleaned every other day. Yuck.

[YellowMare94]

Thanks, all! You guys have all been so helpful and given me a LOT to think about. Concerning the stall buckets, her horse is a slob with both grain and hay, constantly dropping both in one of the two buckets hanging in his stall. I have moved his bucket to a hook on another wall and it somehow got worse LOL. It’s been 90 degrees daily in Ohio lately, and I would not expect ANY horse to drink that water. I scoop out floaters when I’m out there, but it starts to stink and get slimy like a heated bucket does in the winter. He does have one bucket that stays decent that I refill whenever I’m out in the barn. I’m typically a “scrub as needed” person as well. Hers are past needed lol

I really, truly, think this is a case of never being taught proper standards in animal care more than laziness. I was just looking for ideas on ways to approach her that would be received well. I just don’t think she understands the real possibility of colic, thrush, etc. I think she is very capable of learning and she seems to really love animals. It just also seems she needs some direction.

I did have her parents sign the contract and release of liability as well, so no worries there!!

[mmeqcenter]

@YellowMare94

Thanks, all! You guys have all been so helpful and given me a LOT to think about. Concerning the stall buckets, her horse is a slob with both grain and hay, constantly dropping both in one of the two buckets hanging in his stall. I have moved his bucket to a hook on another wall and it somehow got worse LOL!

How far away was the hook on the other wall? I’ve moved mine to the complete opposite corner of the stall due to several boarders with wasteful horses, made a huge difference.

[trubandloki]

@YellowMare94

I was just looking for ideas on ways to approach her that would be received well.

Having been around COTH for awhile now I have learned that what one person likes the next finds offensive so not knowing this young lady will make it impossible for us to guess what the best way to tell her anything is.

In my world you would be polite but direct.

‘Hey Suzy, I need to talk to about some horse management stuff. I noticed you have not been dumping and cleaning Dobbin’s water buckets. When it gets this hot and there is grain floating in them they start to get really gross really fast. They need to be dumped, washed and refilled daily so there is no risk of Dobbin refusing to drink because his water is gross.’

[candyappy]

I like the list idea. Have it handy and give it to all self care boarders( except your perfect boarder) . Some people do better when they have something to follow.

[Sansena]

People need to be trained to know animals won’t drink disgusting, slimy, stinky water?
Wouldn’t basic empathy inspire someone to know that innately? I mean, if it’s too disgusting for (g) you to drink, why would an animal have less requirements? Not even taking colic into the equation at this point…

Kudos to you who think this is a trainable issue. I wish I had your energy.

[trubandloki]

@Sansena

People need to be trained to know animals won’t drink disgusting, slimy, stinky water?
Wouldn’t basic empathy inspire someone to know that innately? I mean, if it’s too disgusting for (g) you to drink, why would an animal have less requirements? Not even taking colic into the equation at this point…

Kudos to you who think this is a trainable issue. I wish I had your energy.

They will drink out of a puddle when they have a perfectly clean water trough so it is not surprising that some people think a not pristine water bucket is not a huge issue.

(Disclaimer, I waste a ton of water because of how often I clean buckets and troughs.)

[IronwoodFarm]

The reason Boarder #2 is at your barn is because her parents do no want to pay for full board. In fact, because their daughter is a minor, THEY are your boarders. I would address whatever issues you have with them. Actually, I’d just give them notice. Maybe they will send DD to a full board situation where she has more peers. What I can guarantee is that you will not get the kid to provide the level of horse care you want.

I simply won’t take self care, not because there are not responsible owners out there, but because there are so many careless owners. The horse never seems to come first. But rather than get upset about behavior I can’t change, I simply don’t take these kind of boarders.

[HungarianHippo]

OP, consider this middle-of-the-road approach: Put some effort into training the teenager, but make it clear that it’s not just a “nice to know” kind of situation-- that you want her to remain a boarder but that can only happen if she lives up to your standards of horse care. A list is a good idea-- these are not difficult skills she needs to learn, she just needs to learn that tasks # 1, 2, 3 all need to be done on xyz schedule. Again, copy the parents in on this situation-- it’s not enough that they signed the initial paperwork, they have to know that they’ve been put on informal notice, and that formal notice will follow if improvement is not realized.
None of this has to be harsh or a big conflict. Just, “hey, we need to get better aligned on what self-care at this facility means. Because I enjoy having you and your daughter as boarders, I wanted to give you this heads up that there are some issues but we can hopefully get things back on track”

As long as you communicate all of this in a professional, simple, non-accusatory tone, then if they get mad at you, you can know that it’s entirely on them.

PS Guillherme is 100% right that boarding is not a money-making enterprise. Now that you have some history built up, it should be fairly easy to prepare a clear business plan, where you tally up the real costs and revenue. Be sure to factor in the commercial insurance policies (please make sure you have this!!!), increased farm maintenance, and assign a proper value to the time that you spend on managing the boarding biz. This last part is the area where most small biz owners fall short-- they view their time as free, but this is simply not true and can lead to resentment and burnout. Not to mention it hides a real risk that if you are incapacitated in any way, the business needs to have a plan to serve its clients, and that won’t be free. If hubby wants to view the farm as a business, none of this should be objectionable (not that you need his permission in any case) .

[Palm_Beach]

@trubandloki

They will drink out of a puddle when they have a perfectly clean water trough so it is not surprising that some people think a not pristine water bucket is not a huge issue.

(Disclaimer, I waste a ton of water because of how often I clean buckets and troughs.)

I had a puddle drinker. Very perplexing.

[Sansena]

I have a puddle drinker too. Never occurred to me to leave water buckets thick with slime.

[findeight]

Make up a check list, add it to your contract and have both #1 boarder ( she won’t mind) and #2s PARENTS sign the new contract. You can go over each item with them, give them a copy of the list. Put one on the bulletin board. Thafs all the teaching you need to do, let the parents participate with their own child. Picking the stall and dumping water buckets is not rocket science. Betting the parents do not realize the kid is blowing off what she promised them she would do and is not at all ignorant of simple chores, just doesn’t want to do them and maybe is not even at the barn when parents think she is. It has to stop.

DO NOT offer to do neglected chores or charge for them. Make it clear if chores listed are ignored for any reason, you will terminate the contract and they will have 30 days to vacate the premises. That’s the only thing I have ever seen work. In over 50 years. If #2s parents don’t want to sign it, promptly, they have 30 days to leave. And at least one parent must meet with you personally to review it and sign. Don’t send it home with them unsigned, you’ll never see it again.

You even allowing self care is a privilege boarders need to earn. You get rid of this kid, you must realize there are many others out there just like her so your contract needs to spell out exactly what you expect if your boarders and the consequences of failing to meet your terms.

In the future, suggest only taking Adult self care boarders. Not that there aren’t a bunch iof whack job Adults out there but at least you can deal directly with them and not have to go thru parents when their kid is not keeping up their end of the agreement.

IME, BOs who try to be nice and/or are not willing to confront problem boarders actually enable them to continue. That kind of boarder will drive off better quality boarders and force BO to lower their standards and expectation so BO gets more of them moving in as good boarders shy away.

[Scribbler]

i was watching my coach at her barn with one of the teen barn girls the other day. Teen had oiled a girth, so she got praise for that. But then teen needed instruction on what to do with the rag (don’t leave it all scrunched up on the table, wash and hang it) and what to do with the can of conditioner (put it on the shelf in the tack room) and what to do with the other clean rags (put them in the rag drawer).

[YellowMare94]

@mmeqcenter

How far away was the hook on the other wall? I’ve moved mine to the complete opposite corner of the stall due to several boarders with wasteful horses, made a huge difference.

Not far enough!! I need to move the hook or hay bag :lol:

[SharonA]

Just be nice, be friendly, but be clear. Do not say “clean buckets regularly.” That means nothing. Show her, nicely and in a friendly, “Hey, here’s how to do this” way, how to clean a bucket and tell her that she needs to get the buckets this clean, every day.

Why do people think education is confrontational? Did we all consider learning how to read, how to drive, or going through orientation at new job to be confrontational? No; we expected that there would be a teacher and a student. If the OP is willing to take 5 or 10 minutes to be a teacher, she’ll make a difference for this and all future horses this girl might care for.

Three chances for her to get it or be showed how to do it again, and then if no reliable improvement, calmly tell her and her parents that she should find a barn that better fits her needs.

[WildGooseChase]

I manage a facility who offers self care boarding, and I self care board my two horses there. I know both sides.

If she is not providing clean, fresh water to her horses then she is not providing one of the basic tiers of care. I would save yourself the misery and give her notice to leave. Don’t bother justifying the reason why because she will never learn.

I’ve dealt with this countless times. You should tighten up your contract, and enforce it without fail.

[Obsidian_Fire]

@findeight

Make up a check list, add it to your contract and have both #1 boarder ( she won’t mind) and #2s PARENTS sign the new contract. You can go over each item with them, give them a copy of the list. Put one on the bulletin board. Thafs all the teaching you need to do, let the parents participate with their own child. Picking the stall and dumping water buckets is not rocket science. Betting the parents do not realize the kid is blowing off what she promised them she would do and is not at all ignorant of simple chores, just doesn’t want to do them and maybe is not even at the barn when parents think she is. It has to stop.

DO NOT offer to do neglected chores or charge for them. Make it clear if chores listed are ignored for any reason, you will terminate the contract and they will have 30 days to vacate the premises. That’s the only thing I have ever seen work. In over 50 years. If #2s parents don’t want to sign it, promptly, they have 30 days to leave. And at least one parent must meet with you personally to review it and sign. Don’t send it home with them unsigned, you’ll never see it again.

You even allowing self care is a privilege boarders need to earn. You get rid of this kid, you must realize there are many others out there just like her so your contract needs to spell out exactly what you expect if your boarders and the consequences of failing to meet your terms.

In the future, suggest only taking Adult self care boarders. Not that there aren’t a bunch iof whack job Adults out there but at least you can deal directly with them and not have to go thru parents when their kid is not keeping up their end of the agreement.

IME, BOs who try to be nice and/or are not willing to confront problem boarders actually enable them to continue. That kind of boarder will drive off better quality boarders and force BO to lower their standards and expectation so BO gets more of them moving in as good boarders shy away.

Well said, and VERY VERY VERY VERY true.