First Dressage Lesson Wednesday! Any Advice?

[narcisco]

As an instructor who works on a very strict schedule, who doesn’t take a lot of new students and who gets used to the same riders, same time, day after day, I will admit that sometimes I have accidentally “forgotten” a new student. It takes me while to get into the new routine. It doesn’t mean the new person is bad or forgettable, it’s any changes in routine that throw me off.

They probably thought they were being flexible and probably giving you a privilege to ride with the BNT. In your mind they were dismissing you and throwing you off on someone else. It’s all in how you take it. Go back, try again and keep an open mind either way. If it happens often, then worry.

[Eddy_s_Mom]

[QUOTE=oharabear;4508608]
Well, good! It sounds like it’s on the way to being resolved. I would personally give them another chance and if they mess it up again, move on and find another instructor. I also think that if you felt stressed and over-faced in the last lesson, then you should take the freebie, since you didn’t LEARN much and spent the lesson stressed and tense. I think that was a kind and professional gesture that your trainer made towards resolving the situation.

And Katarine, I think that perhaps the OP got a tad defensive because your posts were a tad aggressive. You did not “hit a nerve,” you just came off as rude in how you phrased things. I was somewhat put off and it’s not even about me. She had a crappy lesson, came on here to vent, and was accused of “agreeing with everyone” (oh heaven forbid) :rolleyes:[/QUOTE]

Thanks :winkgrin:

[QUOTE=slc2;4508726]I think it is a REAL mistake to expect a decent dressage instructor to go ‘Oh…OKAY’ when we say, ‘But I don’t want to canter, and I don’t carry a whip, and Precious doesn’t like a noseband, and Precious doesn’t like teacher saying to kick Precious or bend Precious. When Precious puts her ears back, that means the lesson is over, and Precious is being asked to do too much.’

I don’t think most of us realize how close to that we really are. Doing dressage well really isn’t about making compromises like those.

I really honestly think that many people go to a dressage lesson, expecting that improvement will not be about making changes.

It WILL be about making changes. We often hear on this bb that dressage should never involve anyone doing…well…almost EVERYTHING.

We’re our own worst enemies. The first thing we need to change is to remove all the ‘But I CAN’T!’'s from our vocabularies.

Part of getting into lessons with a trainer is finding out that it is all about making changes, and change is not always comfortable, easy or graceful. We ALWAYS think we’re right in what we’re doing, but we go to an instructor…well…to find out what we’re doing WRONG, and to CHANGE it.

Canter your horse in your lesson. Start right away. Don’t baby your ‘sensitive’ horse. Carry a whip. Learn to use it. When Precious says no to the leg, is a time to use it. Be ready to change your position, try things you don’t know, get on the edge a little bit, move your arms, move your legs, be a little bit inelegant now and then.

No matter who you take lessons from, decide who you are and where you are going.

Go in that ring saying, ‘Mommy wants to ride the FEI, Precious’. Or resolve yourself to wasting your money and your time, and be clear in your mind that you want an instructor that tells you how lovely your new pants look, instead of pushing you to succeed and grow.[/QUOTE]

I have no issue cantering, I have no issue carrying and using a whip. What I have an issue with is that my horse is saying “f-off” when I am asking him. In the past when we were training for hunter I did have to use the whip on occasion when asking for canter departs and to keep him in the canter. We never really resolved that issue before we stopped that training and it’s obvious at this point. No worries, he’s smart, he’ll figure it out It’s good to hear that maybe you guys do kick at times or exaggerate your cues. You have to remember, all I have seen in dressage is formal shows and exhibitions- I have never been on the training side of it. I guess I was just thinking everything had to look effortless. Duh, there is a reason and it doesn’t start that way! I wonder if I could ask to observe a few lessons? At least that way I could see that it’s not all perfect. Guess it doesn’t hurt to ask!

Oh, and I do want my breeches and boots and jackets look lovely! guess I have to employ my husband for that one, huh?? LOL! :winkgrin:

[Sneekers]

[QUOTE=Eddy’s Mom;4508535]
And regardless of who my instructor is, I will fret about the leg yield, because that is my nature.[/QUOTE]

So, you and your horse messed up a leg yield. Everyone starts somewhere. We have all needed to learn how to apply the aids correctly to get the correct response for a movement. If you worry about each new movement you are asked to try, you will simply paralyze yourself. Try to approach it with a “OK, we’ll give it a go” attitude. If you and/or your horse screw it up, well this allows you to see whether or not you understand how to ask, if your horse is responding appropriately and what needs to be learned. Hell, if I don’t ask correctly and emphatically, my mare still thinks it’s easier to trot from the quarterline to the rail in a straight line rather than leg yield! She has her opinions…I don’t worry about it, I fix it. Please don’t take this negatively. Dressage is a learning process. Frustration is normal, fretting is a waste of emotional energy.

Look, it seems that you and your instructor have ironed out the “oops” and are moving forward. Good. You may be a very sensitive person, but you need to try to get past it - otherwise the learning process will be full of unintentional drama. I’m sure you will have far more good lessons than not. And try to take away the lessons learned from the difficult sessions and stay positive and realistic about your progress. You’ll find far more enjoyment that way

Enjoy the journey

[katarine]

[QUOTE=Sneekers;4509086]
So, you and your horse messed up a leg yield. Everyone starts somewhere. We have all needed to learn how to apply the aids correctly to get the correct response for a movement. If you worry about each new movement you are asked to try, you will simply paralyze yourself. Try to approach it with a “OK, we’ll give it a go” attitude. If you and/or your horse screw it up, well this allows you to see whether or not you understand how to ask, if your horse is responding appropriately and what needs to be learned. Hell, if I don’t ask correctly and emphatically, my mare still thinks it’s easier to trot from the quarterline to the rail in a straight line rather than leg yield! She has her opinions…I don’t worry about it, I fix it. Please don’t take this negatively. Dressage is a learning process. Frustration is normal, fretting is a waste of emotional energy.

Look, it seems that you and your instructor have ironed out the “oops” and are moving forward. Good. You may be a very sensitive person, but you need to try to get past it - otherwise the learning process will be full of unintentional drama. I’m sure you will have far more good lessons than not. And try to take away the lessons learned from the difficult sessions and stay positive and realistic about your progress. You’ll find far more enjoyment that way

Enjoy the journey[/QUOTE]

What Sneekers said is what I tried and failed to say, and ended up coming across as a cow. Moo, I say. I do apologize. What Sneekers is saying, is where I’m coming from: slow down, breathe, grin, and try. It will occasionally be ugly on the way to purty. And it’ll happen on it’s own good time.

BEST wishes. and again, my apologies.

[whicker]

Eddie’s Mom- I sent you a P.M. Enjoy!

Katarine_ Thank you for the apology! We don’t want to scare E.M off of our forum, do we…

[HollysHobbies]

When I lived in Europe, that happened a lot…husband and wife were both great trainers, but I preferred (and got along better) with the wife (her English was MUCH better also)…for them though, it was quite “normale” to switch if someone wasn’t around that day. It happened at the hunter/event barn I was at here too. Different instructors bring different things/eyes to the table, and that can be really helpful.

Just kindly, but firmly, express to your trainer that you’d like to work exclusively with her if that’s where you’re comfortable for now…sounds like you did that and got a really fair response. In a few years, you might need her husband’s eyes on you too!

I personally try to train the horse in its best gait, (not necessarily first walk, then trot, then canter)…if it’s comfortable and doing really well in trot, I’ll start new movements there. If it’s better in canter, I’ll develop that first. Many horses like Arabs have more energy (nervous or otherwise), along with my OTTBs and the morgans I had did MUCH better if you began in trot or canter…walk was frustrating for them…they needed to burn off steam and there was no point battling…let them learn (bending or contact or whatever) where they’re comfortable and come back to the other gaits to reinforce what they’ve learned.

Good luck! Have fun and don’t stress. I know when I trained at that barn in Europe, I was DEFINATELY the worst rider in the barn (everyone there was schooling or competing GrandPrix), but you know what, I have a really solid seat and have experience on a lot of greenies and they were willing to take me on, despite my lack of knowledge. You’ll pick it up. Be open to change…if you respect this woman’s riding, then go with what she says. My current trainer actually gets on my horses for 15 min of my lessons now, to show me what to do…that helps me so much…she talks through her corrections of the horse so I can SEE how to fix things, step by step, in the moment it happens (or moment and a half haha!)

We ALL mess up leg yields, half-passes, whatever…as you progress, you fix it faster and faster…until you watch those grand-prix riders and they fix so quick you don’t even see their corrections.

Consider a subscription to Dressage Today or head to your local library and starting reading the fundamentals of dressage…NOT to use to question your teacher, but so that you’re familiar with the vocabulary! I liked Lessons with Lendon by Lendon Grey.

Have FUN OUT THERE!

[atr]

Glad you have resolved the problem.

And the thing about dressage is that it “looks so easy” but, my goodness, it takes a lot of grunting and sweat to get to that point sometimes

[The_Centaurian]

Tallahassee

[QUOTE=katarine;4492647]

This is Tallahassee folks, you AIN’T all that, ladybug.

So yeah um maybe ask where to go when you get there

PS- I know take dressage lessons from an absolute treasure of an instructor, so they come in all forms :)[/QUOTE]

I am trying to take lessons in Tallahassee, too Without naming names, I feel your pain; I too have had some discouraging experiences. Would you want to recommend a good instructor in Tallahassee? I would be much obliged!

[whicker]

Eddy’s Mom,
Who is the gorgeous mover on your profile page? With a trot like that, you should knock the instructor’s eyeballs out! It won’t take much to be on your way to getting your bronze rider medal. Maybe that movement is part of what suggested to the instructor that you and your horse had more base than you said.

[katarine]

[QUOTE=The Centaurian;4509584]
I am trying to take lessons in Tallahassee, too Without naming names, I feel your pain; I too have had some discouraging experiences. Would you want to recommend a good instructor in Tallahassee? I would be much obliged![/QUOTE]

I’m sorry, I can’t be any help. I fled Florida in 1993 or 4.

[egontoast]

If the trainer simply forgot and then apologized that is far different from how it was described in the first place - “had to run to town” “will just have to join in on his lesson” and no mention that she forgot or any mention of an apology.

I showed up about 15mins before my lesson to warm up, and was told that my instructor had run into town and wouldn’t be there. I’m like, great, this is ackward. So said instructor’s husband (big-time trainer) says I will just have to join in on his lesson. First of all, I felt AWFUL for intruding on this girl’s lesson, secondly it was a horrible match given levels and thirdly, I am sure the trainer did not want to have to deal with myself and my horse when I wasn’t even his client.

[Eddy_s_Mom]

[QUOTE=HollysHobbies;4509344]
When I lived in Europe, that happened a lot…husband and wife were both great trainers, but I preferred (and got along better) with the wife (her English was MUCH better also)…for them though, it was quite “normale” to switch if someone wasn’t around that day. It happened at the hunter/event barn I was at here too. Different instructors bring different things/eyes to the table, and that can be really helpful.

Just kindly, but firmly, express to your trainer that you’d like to work exclusively with her if that’s where you’re comfortable for now…sounds like you did that and got a really fair response. In a few years, you might need her husband’s eyes on you too!

I personally try to train the horse in its best gait, (not necessarily first walk, then trot, then canter)…if it’s comfortable and doing really well in trot, I’ll start new movements there. If it’s better in canter, I’ll develop that first. Many horses like Arabs have more energy (nervous or otherwise), along with my OTTBs and the morgans I had did MUCH better if you began in trot or canter…walk was frustrating for them…they needed to burn off steam and there was no point battling…let them learn (bending or contact or whatever) where they’re comfortable and come back to the other gaits to reinforce what they’ve learned.

Good luck! Have fun and don’t stress. I know when I trained at that barn in Europe, I was DEFINATELY the worst rider in the barn (everyone there was schooling or competing GrandPrix), but you know what, I have a really solid seat and have experience on a lot of greenies and they were willing to take me on, despite my lack of knowledge. You’ll pick it up. Be open to change…if you respect this woman’s riding, then go with what she says. My current trainer actually gets on my horses for 15 min of my lessons now, to show me what to do…that helps me so much…she talks through her corrections of the horse so I can SEE how to fix things, step by step, in the moment it happens (or moment and a half haha!)

We ALL mess up leg yields, half-passes, whatever…as you progress, you fix it faster and faster…until you watch those grand-prix riders and they fix so quick you don’t even see their corrections.

Consider a subscription to Dressage Today or head to your local library and starting reading the fundamentals of dressage…NOT to use to question your teacher, but so that you’re familiar with the vocabulary! I liked Lessons with Lendon by Lendon Grey.

Have FUN OUT THERE![/QUOTE]

Wow! What an amazing opportunity! Thanks for your advice, it is appreciated so much!

[QUOTE=atr;4509368]Glad you have resolved the problem.

And the thing about dressage is that it “looks so easy” but, my goodness, it takes a lot of grunting and sweat to get to that point sometimes :)[/QUOTE]

LOL! Something I think I just realized…

[QUOTE=whicker;4509698]Eddy’s Mom,
Who is the gorgeous mover on your profile page? With a trot like that, you should knock the instructor’s eyeballs out! It won’t take much to be on your way to getting your bronze rider medal. Maybe that movement is part of what suggested to the instructor that you and your horse had more base than you said.[/QUOTE]

Yes, that’s the horse I am riding in my lessons. Thanks for the compliment!! He’s a lovely mover and very much prefers the arena to the trail. He is for sale but I do kind of hope he sticks around awhile, I would love to show him dressage (given we can get that far :D) in Arabian Sport Horse. We’ll just keep on keepin’ on :winkgrin:

[slc2]

In the past when we were training for hunter I did have to use the whip on occasion when asking for canter departs and to keep him in the canter.

[B]That’s probably why he says eff off when he’s asked to use himself a little more.

Yeah, there’s a lot of imperfect moments in training. No biggie
[/B]

[kpony]

What I have an issue with is that my horse is saying “f-off” when I am asking him.

Sounds like you will be fine - have fun!