MorganPony86, Your horse is legally considered an attractive nuisance. Expect to get sued. You better have darn good insurance!
No one ever wants to ride my horses…
I think the trick is to regale acquaintances with stories of how you fell off in this lesson, or your horse spooked at a manhole cover he’s seen 8000 times before, unseating you, and show off periodic bruises. Mention concussions. Also mention barn horror stories in passing, like about how your friend’s horse suddenly lost his mind on the trail and ran all the way back to the barn, and your friend had to ride double. Behave as though this is just another day at the races.
Also, make sure that the only truly suitable “guest horse” you own is a 17hh Clydesdale named “Spooky.”
Guest: “Hey, can we ride your horses?”
Me: “Sure, old Spook is ready to go!”
Guest: “The big black one?”
Me: “Yep, she’s the guest horse.”
Guest: “She’s…really, really big”
Me: “Wanna go for a ride in the Gator instead?”
Guest: “Yay! Farm stuff!”
Me: “Here, take this toolbox and check the fenceline while you’re at it.”
Another thing that works isn’t to recommend lessons, but I will give parents the names of two places that run “Pony Birthday Parties.” These are good barns with nice horses, and the parties have all the safety bases covered…but no commitment required. It’s a nice compromise, and relatively affordable. I can honestly speak highly of the two programs I recommend. Both offer lesson programs as well, so if the kid is interested after the party, they can choose to continue. With my horses, most kids would have to be led…my horses just won’t listen to someone who doesn’t know how to ride. Especially if their legs are really short. When I explain that, and talk about how at the Pony Party they will get a chance to steer the horse themselves and do some fun games…that sounds a lot better.
The flat out “No” is fine for people that you don’t particularly care about, or who ask you completely out of the blue. It’s a bit rude if the person is an acquaintance that you want to continue a relationship with. Important to set the boundary with a friend, for sure…but flat out “No” is probably not what I’d do. These Pony Parties run for adults too, people will do them as work team-building and stuff. When friends ask to come over and ride, I’ll often suggest we arrange a group ride, that way everyone can get on a horse at the same time and we can make a day of it (with someone else’s horses, ideally.) Also, some people ask to ride as a way to show that they are interested in doing something with you that YOU enjoy. My mother is terrible for this. “We should ride sometime!” Sure mom, any time. Just wear barn clothes when you want to go.
So far, in six years, she has NEVER arrived prepared to ride. I am not at risk in agreeing to let her ride my horses, she never intends to follow through. I appreciate that she would like to share my hobby. We usually go shoe shopping instead. :winkgrin:
How’d you like having a busy road running smack through the middle of your farm? The one that attracts every jogger, biker, dog-walker, stroller-pusher, and brain-dead yuppie on a cell phone. None of whom, apparently, can READ the 64 signs you have up that say “No Parking,” “Do Not Feed the Horses,” “Do Not Climb on Gates & Fences” and “Private Property.” None of those apply to THEM, you understand, because we live in The Land of Spe-shul!
"TAKE YOUR CHILD OFF THAT WALL!!! NOW!!! Those rocks weigh up to 90 lbs., and they ROLL!!! (Who, us???) YES!!! I DON’T WANT ANYONE GETTING HURT!!! AND BY THE WAY, THERE’S NO PARKING HERE!!! (But we just wanted to see the horses . . . ) having unloaded 3 toddlers, a baby being dandled over the fence, half a birthday party dressed as princesses who brought a 10-lb. bag of carrots. GET IN YOUR CAR AND LEAVE, NOW!!! Etc. 
Sometimes the only way they get it is if I ask them how they’d take it if I rolled up the driveway of their gate-guarded McMansion, unloaded my extended family in their driveway, and began playing with their dog and feeding it God-knows-what. For some reason people think if you have a farm, it makes it the Bronx Zoo . . . :eek:
[QUOTE=Lady Eboshi;6991769]
How’d you like having a busy road running smack through the middle of your farm? The one that attracts every jogger, biker, dog-walker, stroller-pusher, and brain-dead yuppie on a cell phone. None of whom, apparently, can READ the 64 signs you have up that say “No Parking,” “Do Not Feed the Horses,” “Do Not Climb on Gates & Fences” and “Private Property.” None of those apply to THEM, you understand, because we live in The Land of Spe-shul!
"TAKE YOUR CHILD OFF THAT WALL!!! NOW!!! Those rocks weigh up to 90 lbs., and they ROLL!!! (Who, us???) YES!!! I DON’T WANT ANYONE GETTING HURT!!! AND BY THE WAY, THERE’S NO PARKING HERE!!! (But we just wanted to see the horses . . . ) having unloaded 3 toddlers, a baby being dandled over the fence, half a birthday party dressed as princesses who brought a 10-lb. bag of carrots. GET IN YOUR CAR AND LEAVE, NOW!!! Etc. :D[/QUOTE]
My daughter’s school (in an unfortunate choice by the board), sold some property adjacent to the polo arena and polo pasture to a car dealer. One day the girls were tacking up and watched a parent lift their child over the (fairly tall) fence to pet the pretty ponies. Talk about stupid!
[QUOTE=morganpony86;6991442]
I don’t mean to hijack the thread, but the OP said something that made me think…
My neighbors often allow their kids/grandkids to come up to my pasture fence (it’s along the property line) and pet my horses. Now, with my two old Morgans, this wasn’t an issue, but I have concerns with my young TB that he may get spooked, turn, and kick out, or really any of my horses may give a friendly “love bite” looking for treats. I’ve told them of the dangers and asked them to stop, but they keep on going saying they’re “farm people, and we understand how to be around horses.” Sigh. I can’t stop them, because they’re on their property, just reaching over the fence.
What is the liability issue if your horse is on your property (properly fenced in), someone else is on a neighboring property, and they get injured because they’re reaching over/through the fence?[/QUOTE]
This is what’s wrong… people want to do what they want to. So rude and disrespectful.
Yes, YOU are liable if they get bit or kicked reaching over the fence. A horse is considered in legal terms an Attractive Nuisance. If someone walks on your property, trips and breaks their neck YOU are liable because they are on YOUR property. Best solution is to put another fence up to keep a 5 foot barrier so they cannot reach your horses, maybe some bushes/landscaping.
I had someone ask me continually to ride one of my horses and I finally said; “My horse will kill you” then I laughed. She doesn’t ask anymore.
The “farm people” need to be told “I don’t want anyone petting my horses regardless”. Understand since these people have already proven to be rude, disrespectful jerks, they will be mad. But that’s okay because who needs rude, disrespectful jerks in their life anyway. Good way to weed out the bad people. Put up another fence.
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No trespassing/private property signs on all fences/driveways.
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Horses are dangerous. Do not feed or touch signs on all fences. If these don’t work, Horse Has Severe Allergies, Do Not Feed sometimes works better/in addition.
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Gate your driveway.
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Sorry, no. Rinse and repeat. It is a full sentence. Explanations beg for others to ‘fix’ your issue with them.
I tell people “my horse (s) are not for beginners. She would kill you (your children, whatever…)” with a smile on my face, and walk away.
As far as people showing up uninvited, I would walk out there and inform them that this is not a good time, please leave, and give them the number to a petting zoo or public farm.
Jeez. Some people. Consider a locked gate. :lol:
[QUOTE=doublesstable;6991783]
.
I had someone ask me continually to ride one of my horses and I finally said; “My horse will kill you” then I laughed. She doesn’t ask anymore.
.[/QUOTE]
HAHAHA, I see I am not alone in this. I’m telling you, it works!! :lol:
Folks in my town pretty well know to stay off my property. I am VERY vocal about it. Not ashamed of that either. Why should I get sued to kingdom come because some idiot illegally entered my property?
reply to microbovine
[QUOTE=microbovine;6991304]
Do you have a perimeter fence? If not, you sorely need one. I have never had neighbors come in uninvited. I would be pretty ticked off if they did. Lock the gates, if you have to.
Now, our farm is child friendly because we have a young child, but it took a lot of extra work. Sometimes using the terms “working farm” or “breeding farm” around co-workers gives them a different impression. Make sure they know you have a stallion. It sounds funny, but it might just click in their minds that their children may be exposed to horse sex and scare them away.
I would also politely tell them that your farm is not child friendly (clearly this is the case if a child can get into a stallion’s pen) and refer them to the nearest reputable rental stable or children’s farm in your area. Mention something about the rental stable having reasonable prices (even if they don’t) because then you are alluding to the fact that visiting farms is something people pay for. Subtle, but these methods should dissaude all but the rudest folks.[/QUOTE]
I do have a perimeter fence! it was the first thing i put up when i bought the farm. And as soon as these folks stepped out of the car they were told to keep their kids away from all the paddocks specifically the stallion and i would bring the shetland to them for a brush and a pat n the nose, i also briefed them to keep the kids away from his hind end. He does not kick but its a rule. All to no avail. I used to lock the gate when i first had the property and will be doing so again.
[QUOTE=Hulk;6991545]
Wow what a timely thread. Just happened yesterday. A truck pulled in the driveway went to the neighbors we share the drive with. Start asking questions about if they can ride the horses. Neighbors allmost unpolietly inform them that all the horses here belong to us and are retired and kept as pets and NOT ridden. (I dont know why but our neighbors are very protective of us).
Then these people drive over to my DH in the driveway and start asking the same questions, about if they can ride, blah blah blah. DH says the blankidy blank riding stable is the next road up on the right. Person persists “my niece used to get lessons here, do you know blah blah?” DH says, No the blankidy blank riding stable is the next road up on the right. Person persists “well can I ride your horses?” DH says NO the blankidy blank riding stable is the next road up on the right.
Well 8 to 10 questions later they finally get the not so subtle hint from DH and the neighbors to go away. But what bothers me the most is that the whole time this is going on the lady has a ciggarette in her hand dangling out the window. And I was thinking you had better not drop that , or I will come out of my hiding place in the house, and you will find out why I have the nickname Hulk.
OK, rant over, I feel a little better. Calming calming… anyways sorry, thats how we deal with it.[/QUOTE]
Thats my neighborhood. Folks that do not take no for an answer. I have no climb mesh fence with hot wire on top all along the roadway ( on the inside of my property i have electric), signs that say the fence is electrified and very direct signage that says trespassers without explicit written permission to enter will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. No one whatsoever is hijacking the thread, i appreciate every opinion. I had a great conversation with my insurance company when i first bought the property hence the signage which dissuades most. The rest i refer them to the multiple riding stables around me and explain that mine is a breeding farm and in no way a riding stable. The ones that don’t get it I’ll just have to be blunt and particularily direct. and lock the gate
Sometimes I wonder if a mannequin of Grandma Clampett with a shotgun sitting in the rocking chair on my porch would do the trick . . .
[QUOTE=Cuardach;6991117]
how in the world can i politely say no to friends, neighbors, and even people at work who think its ok to ask if their kids, or even themselves can just come out to my farm and ride. [/QUOTE]
“My horse would likely kill you and my insurance does not cover that.”
[QUOTE=rugbygirl;6991759]
…
Guest: “Hey, can we ride your horses?”
Me: “Sure, old Spook is ready to go!”
Guest: “The big black one?”
Me: “Yep, she’s the guest horse.”
Guest: “She’s…really, really big”
Me: “Wanna go for a ride in the Gator instead?”
Guest: “Yay! Farm stuff!”
Me: “Here, take this toolbox and check the fenceline while you’re at it.”
…[/QUOTE]
:lol:
Yeah, same tack … if someone rejoinders with what an expert they are, then the next conversation can commence.
Them: Oh but I’m an expert rider, I know all about everything.
[except why people don’t want strangers to ride their horses]
Me [this is mean fun because I already sense where they are re riding]: Oh good! You must have a lot of riding experience!
[key phrase, ‘you must have a lot of experience’ - it all comes out then!]
Them: Oh yes, I took six lessons when I was ten!
[or, have been on three trail rides! or, my friend had a horse and we used to go feed him carrots!]
Me, all serious and respectful as if I have found a kindred spirit: That’s great! So, you sit a spook-and-bolt pretty well, then? Lightning is kind of bad about that, but usually I manage to get him into a circle before he runs into the woods.
[tone insinuates them & me are both rich in this sort of experience]
Them: Uh … [pales slightly]
Me: His trot is so rough and horrible, but his canter is smooth. Of course it’s kind of hard to slow him down. But you’ve handled that before.
Them: Well … [paler]
Me: He doesn’t usually buck, but you never know. But if you’re used to it, it’s not a big deal.
Them: Don’t you have a calmer horse I could ride? That one sounds pretty awful!
Me: [extremely cheerful] Nope, he’s the only one! I’ve been riding the old sinner for years. He hasn’t killed me yet!
At that point the person can think of many other things they would rather do on the weekends! :winkgrin: I should probably throw in a few barn chores as well, following the other suggestions. “While we’re out there we really need to pick out several stalls, I’m so glad you’ll be there to help! And all the water buckets need changing every time I go out. Well, you know how it is, most high-maintenance animal ever.” 
[QUOTE=OverandOnward;6992444]
At that point the person can think of many other things they would rather do on the weekends! :winkgrin: I should probably throw in a few barn chores as well, following the other suggestions. “While we’re out there we really need to pick out several stalls, I’m so glad you’ll be there to help! And all the water buckets need changing every time I go out. Well, you know how it is, most high-maintenance animal ever.” [/QUOTE]
I have used the barn chore thing. I had forgotten that when we first moved back to Texas, DH’s sister decided her kids should ride. Now I was giving lessons to my other nieces, but their mother and I had agreed on some rules. The kids (who were 4 and 5 at the time, I think) came to the barn about 5-10 times before they ever got to ride. They helped groom the horse, they cleaned stalls (yeah, we were meanie and made 4 year olds help clean stalls), they cleaned water buckets, they helped feed. They learned to lead the horses and we played leading games.
No, the work they did wasn’t great. But their mom and I wanted them to learn that with horses came WORK. And you had to do WORK before you got to have fun. And those girls stuck with it as long as their mom would/could bring them out.
My husband’s sister, OTOH, thought that I was her personal pony ride business. She wanted to drop 2-3 kids off at the barn (her two and their step-brother - who was actually their FATHER’s step-son, not her step-son, if you can follow that - in other words, a kid I had never met). She then wanted to leave and let me wrangle the kids. I was supposed to give them lessons and keep them from getting killed. So when I told her the rules - they had to come out and work several times before there would be any riding, she got snotty and said, “I don’t have time for that BS.”
I would have liked the two nieces to come out and share the horses with me, but I really didn’t want to spend all my time working and never getting to enjoy my horses. I didn’t want to run a free pony ride business. If they had shared in the work, that would have been fine.
So… chores do scare a lot of them off. 
(But a word of warning - I now don’t do family events. That was apparently what made my husband’s sister decide to treat me and our other SIL like garbage. So… whatever… If you want family harmony, maybe this approach isn’t good :)).
[QUOTE=cowgirljenn;6992517]
I would have liked the two nieces to come out and share the horses with me, but I really didn’t want to spend all my time working and never getting to enjoy my horses. I didn’t want to run a free pony ride business. If they had shared in the work, that would have been fine. [/QUOTE]
It’s best it didn’t work out, because they don’t have the parental support they would need to get into horses, even a little bit. It might have been a big disappointment for them when their mom just didn’t come through on other things, as well.
I have a feeling you are in a much more harmonious life than if you were dealing with the aggravation of ‘pony-rides’. And meanwhile the other cousins are wondering why they are the ones that have to work to ride. She was probably destined to treat you like garbage over something. :winkgrin:
Maybe it’s easier to say “My horse’s brakes and steering aren’t so good. Can your kid ride as fast as my horse can run?” 
There was a family sitting at the gate where i board waiting for someone to let them in. They stopped me and asked if their daughter could pet the horses since she likes them. I said no this is a boarding facility and it would be a huge liability for them to go in there.
My last horse was a Arabian. Pretty, flashy and floaty - lots of people wanted to try him. I let a few who I trusted, but most people got the same answer - He bites! I just didn`t tell them it was a nippy baby thing and not to bend over in front of him - lol.
I guess it depends on the circumstances. I have had a couple of my daughter’s friends out to sit on her pony and be led around by me. She isn’t at home a the moment but at a great boarding/lesson barn with lots of kids. DD’s trainer is quite happy for us to bring a friend out on a quiet day as long as they are properly dressed and sign a waiver and insurance stuff. I think in the long run for her they are all potential students. I do have to say though that dd has number of school friends whose parents think it is ok to ask me if the kids can come and ride the pony. Same thing as many others have posted…kids love horses, they have been to “horse camp” ,they have been on trail rides etc. I usually answer that the pony isn’t really cooperative if the kids aren’t solid riders, which is true, Pearl is a saint but wont go if you just sit on her and kick. I also then let the parent know that the kid might really love riding, then tell them about a normal 5am start for a horse show weekend, and the fact that our horse bills are over double our mortgage every month…they usually don’t ask again
[QUOTE=horseymum;6992698]
our horse bills are over double our mortgage every month…they usually don’t ask again :)[/QUOTE]
Good plan, hit them with how much it’s going to cost them if they encourage their horse-loving children
