This is a super comment…I am going to steal a bit of this when I’m teaching some “leany” beginners this weekend! Thanks.
Learn how to recognize that blank feeling and understand that the best, safest response to it is to close your hand, put your leg on and feel yourself stretching tall.
I second moxie’s comment. This is great. Thanks!
I haven’t read all the comments, but speaking as someone who lack depth perception and hence NEVER sees a distance - I definitely lean when I’m worried/nervous/not as confident (show nerves definitely encourage leaning). My main issue is that I get worried (probably from a lifetime of not knowing exactly where things are) that I’m going to miss the distance (my horse keeps telling me this is her job, quit trying to do her job) and I look at the jump. Looking down creates leaning forward, creates leg off. I practice at home as well, and do it over EVERYTHING - if I’m not paying attention, I will look down over trot poles so I am very concious about “eyes up”.
My solution - get straight to the jump then pick a spot beyond the jump and STARE at it. I end up back and with my leg on. I thought I was not looking down as much as I was until a lesson with someone and she noted that like a half stride from the jump, I look down - but I don’t always focus on the jump so I don’t “See” myself looking down but I don’t have a memory of where I was looking - as if my eyes were closed over the jump.
Eyes up keeps me back,leg on and I am much more with my horse jumping.
Funny story…I have taken to screaming “eyes up” at myself at shows (especially this year, as I moved up a level). I was out on cross country, screaming eyes up at myself over a jump and there were these poor competitors that were say 50ft beyond the jump and well out of the way. I felt bad that they may have thought I was yelling at them so I tried to clarify as I galloped past but that may have just made me seem like a crazy person…so if you are in Area II and see someone coming around on the cutest little bay mare you ever did see (it’s true, just ask her) screaming eyes up, don’t worry, it’s not you, it’s me.
I went back and reread this and want to add that something that has helped is learning what the “correct” canter feels like - different in stadium than cross country, but my trainer and I have spent a good deal of time learning how to half halt, not to much, not to little…not to far from the jump, not to close…to make sure my mare isn’t flat going to the jump or getting in to close. Basically, one halfhalt roughtly 6 strides out (I don’t know distance so this is a complete WAG) or coming out of the corner preps her for the jump. Then pick a spot, stare at it, attempt to look for the next jump in the air (not always successful, sometimes I’m to busy worrying about the jump I’m going over - why? No one knows).
I want to thank you all for the wonderful comments and suggestions! I rode tonight and practiced with a ground pole or two, it really seemed to help. Thank you - thread’s like these are why COTH is so wonderful.
Agree with much of above. Wanted to add that I love a line of tiny bounces, like tall cavalletti, to help riders feel the horse coming up to them. I told one young rider to picture a dolphin. It really helps if you go through and think about just letting the hip fold as the horse leaps “up” to you. Another exercise that a trainer said Joe Fargis used was to go through a line of bounces with super short stirrups - think jockey length. You cannot lean forward and not die, so you stay back. That one was kind of freaky, but it did force the issue! I love gymnastics to build confidence and focus on equitation - you ensure a correct distance and simplify that and can just focus on yourself more, to build a correct muscle memory.
Another thought. Make certain your stirrups are short enough. Watching people jumping xc, it is surprising how many people could usefully pull up a couple of holes to assist their balance. We focus so much on deeper seat and longer leg in dressage that it can now seem quite extreme to shorten as much as needed to jump.
There was comment about how short Harry Meade was riding at Kentucky 5* this year but he had a beautifully balanced seat and horse all the way round.
I love COTH formus. These are such great replies. I need to spend more time here. Paying attention to stirrup length is huge. In one Wofford clinic he made us all jump a few fences with absurdly short stirrups. Like 6 holes up. After that I went up a couple on my normal length. That was a long time ago. My knees protest that length now. One thing I want to add is Lucinda Green making everyone walk fences at the beginning of gymnastics day. If you lean in, they are much less likely to jump it at all. Staying back and adding leg and steering on a longer rein really puts riders in tune with exactly how late they need to wait before “folding.” It’s maybe not something you want to work on by yourself because you could get pretty discouraged. (Speaking for myself here. I want a ground person giving me feedback for this). And maybe yank your horse’s mouth. Lucinda makes them grab mane, I think. It’s been awhile. I make my own students grab mane at/after take off. But getting over the barrels or just one barrel from a walk is a great skill for the riders whose horses will actually stop or run out if they lean forward. I’ve seen a couple robot horses that teach the riders nothing.
I went to a Laine Ashker clinic once and she had us walking the first fence. A skinny ascending oxer set at our competition height with a ground pole in front. This also put riders in tune with the idea that speed and leaning in isn’t necessary or helpful to jump their level. If you’re walking the fences you have to wait for the jump to come to you. (on most horses). And if that’s too easy make it a skinny with no guide rails. (a single barrel laying down with flower boxes or something to stabilize it on both sides.)
For other exercises, there is a fantastic article in Practical Horseman on the topic of hip angle playing a part in rider position and balance over fences. And exercises to help -
I had an epiphany last month regarding distance while watching the 1.20m Open table at a show. Started counting the strides between the outside line after a pair caught an awkward distance, nearly got buried, but made it with six and a chip. Horse #2 had nine. Along came the show jumper that my trainer trains with, piloting a young horse. A few strides from the second fence, he angled out wide then swung back in to find a straight approach. Eleven strides. Coming back through on a different horse, his stride count was different. Slooooowly it dawned on me – there is no distance – only trajectory. And that changed to suit the rhythm of each horse. If he had steady rhythm & impulsion & a relaxed horse, he left things alone & changed the trajectory of their approach to accommodate the horse.
Equestrian-related “Doh!” moments are my forte, so
I’m sure I’m the last person on the face of the earth to catch on to this 
(Don’t even get me started on how I didn’t understand exactly what a half halt entailed for 35 out of 40 years of riding). And of course distances exist in Hunters. And it’s not like I ride well enough to actually execute this concept…
HA! Nice…my horse’s dam had a VERY short stride - to the point where someone commented that her horse wanted to turn a one stride into a two stride because my horse did (not sure the accuracy of that statement but whatever). One thing I never worried about her was going through lines - once she was over the first jump, it was like she couldn’t figure out what to do except go through the line.
This is unlike her daughter that can run out on the second jump in a bounce - not common for her, she only runs out when she thinks we aren’t going to make it safely to the other side. Previously, my saddle was throwing me all over the place, wreaking our collective balance. These days it’s the leaning/forgetting how to ride.
Our two problems currently - my lack of ability to put up related fences (last one started out at like 2 3/4 strides or something, which is why I always start my lines at like 2’ because my horse will take the long stride/chip and go over and I can fix but if I go 2’9" or 3’-current competition height - she doesn’t have as much faith in us). Couple this with the fact that she’s 15’2HH and the only other one that jumps where I keep her is like 17HH…figuring out a stride length that works for both of us can be interesting.
Reviving zombie threads is my specialty, so here we go again 
All of this advice is great. I just have one remaining question: when working on leaning issues, what do you recommend for releases? Or do you just not really bother if the fences are only 2’? I have never jumped above 2’3 consistently but I really, really want to fix my leaning problem now since we are ready to start adding in a few larger fences. What do I do with my hands?! Especially when practicing over crossrails or 2’? I feel myself wanting to lean forward so there is slack in the reins so I don’t catch my horse in the mouth as he can jump fairly round even over small fences, but I don’t have my position trained to keep the leg in place while also giving the release. Help!
Just a thought. If you are walking along with a bag full of shopping and you suddenly open your hand, what happens? You drop the bag. When you are riding at a fence and you drop the reins, what happens? The horse is suddenly “dropped” and becomes unbalanced. You are not helping the horse by worrying about about catching him in the teeth. Rather, you need a steady, following hand, one that moves with the horse. Another analogy: think of walking along holding hands with your romantic partner. Both are aware of each other, secure in the relationship and if one moves the other automatically moves with them, in harmony. That is a the contact you need.
If your reins are short enough to start with, you really don’t need much of a release at all. See the below video, and watch some others at half speed and pay attention to the rider’s hands.
@Willesdon @endlessclimb thank you for your advice. Just had to update to say: I DID IT! For the first time in ages today, during my lesson, I felt that magic feeling where the horse jumps up to you- and my reins were short! I was able to give my horse the release he needed and he jumped beautifully. It felt great.
Was it over a crossrail? Yup. Was it only over one out of the eight jumps I did? Yup. But that’s 12.5% more than the last time I jumped, so that’s improvement.
It’s a lovely feeling when it goes just right.
Think about “long arms” and separating your arms from your body. Arms + Shoulders tend to get riders in trouble; riders want to release, but use the arm/shoulder/upper body as an intact unit…so when the hands go forward, the whole body goes forward. Or, alternatively, riders might plant their hands at the withers and then duck with the shoulder, instinctively feeling the need to “go with” the horse, but using the wrong body part (shoulders) instead of hands.
It may help to ride with a long neck strap (I use a racing yoke, or even a hay string), long enough that you can hold it while sitting up riding a posting trot. Neck straps that are too forward can encourage a rider to throw themselves too far up the neck to grab it. But holding something can give you confidence that you won’t hit your horse in the mouth as you work to wait with your shoulders.
Also, practice a following arm at the canter. Whether or not riders jump ahead, it’s a common fault to pump with the upper body at canter in an attempt to follow the horse’s motion. Instead , think of “greasing your elbows” and exaggerating a following motion with your hands/arms to the horse’s mouth; while moving your hips and quieting your upper body. Just having some conscious awareness of hands/elbows, vs shoulders, vs hips can help separate your body parts so each can follow the horse independently.
This is all great advice, thank you! I am a hunter (just invading the eventing group for this specific thread) so the idea of a big release has been drilled into my head, but I jump such low fences that it’s really not necessary. Plus, from what I’m reading here and what I felt in my lesson, I am able to give plenty of release with a following hand. Fixing the body position is my current priority.
What has worked for me (when I remember to do it) is to think about keeping my feet and heels forward, my chin up, and find something higher up than the fence to look at.
Jim Graham had me do an exercise where I had to ride in two-point at the trot and canter (and hand gallop) and reach my hands forward towards the ears while staying up and balanced. That’s what finally got it to “click” that my hands and arms could, in fact, do different things than my shoulders and upper body. It’s now one of my favorite exercises when I teach. For some reason, doing it in two point solidified it in my brain better than doing it sitting in the saddle.
Look at Muybridge’s time lapse photo of a horse-rider jumping
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