Let's Talk Bullying

[Pennywell_Bay]

The kid was humiliated and cried. The other instructor was embarrassed. The mother was mad- but still continued with the instructor.

My kid does well well with a tough hand. She learns, strives to excel. Interesting- the instructor never- not ever- has spoken to her in that manner.

As to posts- I remember people posting and am not above going to look at old posts. That doesn’t make one a stalker or a Bully. I also call people out on BS and expect to be called out on mine.

I try to approach it as I have something to learn from everyone, even if is how I don’t want to behave.

[sammy14]

@x-halt-salute

I may struggle to find anything rational or credible about your conspiracy theory, but I’ll give you credit for being persistent.

Why in the world would this matter to the conversation at hand? Members of a community took action to prevent unnecessary contact with family members of a public figure in both accounts. There is still no evidence that the CotH Illuminati (:lol: still makes me laugh) sent goons to harass innocent children or downvote YouTube videos. Move on.

Back to bullying instructors (or is it “research” to look back at posts upthread and try to right the ship?), I can’t imagine something similar to Pennywell’s story happening to an adult rider. Mostly because adult riders write the checks (vs. children whose fees are often paid by parents who may not observe lessons), and are more likely to move on to a happier lesson program if they were treated that way.

You move on and stop quoting me.I’ll do as I please.

[x-halt-salute]

@SendenHorse

for the 50th bajillion time, I have nothing against Manni,

I am however against misleading, confusing and lying- I have to call it out no matter where I see it. It’s not fair to this board, it’s a good place. I am trying to keep it “good”. that is all.

C’mon Senden. The gig is up. We all know that there’s a code of secret Illuminati messages in your responses to Manni that are directing CotH henchmen to bully innocent children and thumbs-down YouTube videos.

[McGurk]

Huh? If there was a point there, I missed it.

Explain to me, please, where Manni was right, and I will be happy to acknowledge it.

I was referring to her about the stalking thing, I never tried to say I wasn’t. I didn’t call her out specifically by name because I thought it would be rude and unnecessary. Those who were involved in the incident would remember it; those who weren’t didn’t need to know names. The point (I swear, there was a point!) was the difference in perception. I was offended by being called a stalker, Manni was offended when I and other posters put “Proud stalker” as our title as a joke. I thought the offense was calling people stalkers; Manni thought the offense was the joking title. Neither one is right or wrong, it’s a matter of perspective. Perspective on who is being bullied and who is bullying can sometimes legitimately differ.

If the whole “Manni was right” bandwagon was about whether or not I was referring to her in the original post in this thread, congratulations, you’re right! I was! I didn’t know that it was ever in dispute.

As for the rest of it, remembering or researching someone’s previous post history is NOT bullying, or stalking.

Oh, and for Manni’s fierce defenders: I think Manni is an excellent horsewoman with some very nice horses and a very high standard of care. I have posted that before and will happily post it again. But I do reserve the right to disagree with her about other things, and I am most often polite and respectful.

Research my post history if you don’t believe me.

[x-halt-salute]

@sammy14

You move on and stop quoting me.I’ll do as I please.

:rolleyes: So that’s what the eyeroll emoji is for. You learn something new about this forum every day.

[KBC]

@x-halt-salute

C’mon Senden. The gig is up. We all know that there’s a code of secret Illuminati messages in your responses to Manni that are directing CotH henchmen to bully innocent children and thumbs-down YouTube videos.

DAMMIT, reaches for new inhaler thingy as not to choke while laughing

[Scribbler]

@Pennywell Bay

The kid was humiliated and cried. The other instructor was embarrassed. The mother was mad- but still continued with the instructor.

My kid does well well with a tough hand. She learns, strives to excel. Interesting- the instructor never- not ever- has spoken to her in that manner.

As to posts- I remember people posting and am not above going to look at old posts. That doesn’t make one a stalker or a Bully. I also call people out on BS and expect to be called out on mine.

I try to approach it as I have something to learn from everyone, even if is how I don’t want to behave.

If this was ongoing, shame on the mother.

If it was a one-off it was ugly but hopefully everyone moved on.

[sammy14]

Nice post, McGurk , thanks for the explanation (though nothing was was being directed at you in regards to Manni by me.Still good to know )

Generally to the thread re the Illuminati reference,one can’t conflate low level trolling and gratuitous nastiness with the illuminati, it’s too dumb. People do get together to do dumb things though, no denying that

@McGurk

Huh? If there was a point there, I missed it.
Explain to me, please, where Manni was right, and I will be happy to acknowledge it.

I was referring to her about the stalking thing, I never tried to say I wasn’t. I didn’t call her out specifically by name because I thought it would be rude and unnecessary. Those who were involved in the incident would remember it; those who weren’t didn’t need to know names. The point (I swear, there was a point!) was the difference in perception. I was offended by being called a stalker, Manni was offended when I and other posters put “Proud stalker” as our title as a joke. I thought the offense was calling people stalkers; Manni thought the offense was the joking title. Neither one is right or wrong, it’s a matter of perspective. Perspective on who is being bullied and who is bullying can sometimes legitimately differ.

If the whole “Manni was right” bandwagon was about whether or not I was referring to her in the original post in this thread, congratulations, you’re right! I was! I didn’t know that it was ever in dispute.

As for the rest of it, remembering or researching someone’s previous post history is NOT bullying, or stalking.

Oh, and for Manni’s fierce defenders: I think Manni is an excellent horsewoman with some very nice horses and a very high standard of care. I have posted that before and will happily post it again. But I do reserve the right to disagree with her about other things, and I am most often polite and respectful.

Research my post history if you don’t believe me.

[Pennywell_Bay]

Sadly, in the case I was referring to- that was the worst but it is ongoing. One time said instructor called the students pussies for being timid about something. Why the parents allow it I have no idea. I imagine it is quite demoralizing. The instructor can be quite engaging, funny etc.

At a camp this summer an assistant counselor relayed a story about my kid to her and the instructor said “she acts all tough but pussies out”. All the other PARENTS stood there but I said “well- she’s 9. And don’t ever talk about a kid like that in front of me.” I SHOULD have said it 9 months earlier when the first situation happened.

FYI, this isn’t my kid’s regular instructor.

In in any case- when you post on the internet or a forum- unless you delete it - it’s there for anyone to look up. It isn’t stalking, it generally isn’t creepy especially in a forum environment .

I am,however, totally stalking a pony trainer’s website looking for a cute lease. #stalkersarepeopletoo

[KBC]

@Pennywell Bay

I am,however, totally stalking a pony trainer’s website looking for a cute lease. #stalkersarepeopletoo

:lol::lol::lol:

[x-halt-salute]

@Pennywell Bay I’m fascinated that people put up with that crap (and hope your response gave this instructor pause). I had coaches in various sports as a kid who used colorful language and would occasionally use names to motivate kids (as in, “Hey, you slug, practice isn’t over… keep moving,” kinds of things). But I can’t imagine any of those fun-but-tough characters saying the sorts of things you describe. “Pussy out” makes my skin crawl, especially when used to describe a little kid.

BTW I just noticed your location and nearly snorted water onto my keyboard.

[trubandloki]

@sammy14

She didn’t, she said she didn’t .It wasn’t about her at all until somebody else brought her name into it,but since they have, she has the right of reply.

Underline mine.
Sorry to bring this back up and I will probably get called a stalker for going back the pages to actually look at the posts but… No one else brought up Manni’s name. Manni brought up Manni’s name in association with the post.

[Manni01]

@trubandloki

Underline mine.
Sorry to bring this back up and I will probably get called a stalker for going back the pages to actually look at the posts but… No one else brought up Manni’s name. Manni brought up Manni’s name in association with the post.

you already forgot McGurk?? (BTW very sorry that I even have to mention his/her name now, I think everything which needed to be said was said) And some of you seem to be obsessed with my nick… Here is one user who mentions my name in nearly every post and you mentioned it 3 times

[trubandloki]

@Manni01

you already forgot McGurk?? (BTW very sorry that I even have to mention his/her name now, I think everything which needed to be said was said) And some of you seem to be obsessed with my nick… Here is one user who mentions my name in nearly every post and you mentioned it 3 times

No, I did not forget @McGurk . Not at all. The point made by Sammy14, that I underlined was "until somebody else brought her name into it".
I added some bold to make it more clear and make it harder for you to ignore the point.
McGurk did not mention your name. McGurk mentioned an episode with no names.
You Manni, screamed ‘hey that is about me and that is not fair’. You put your name with the situation. Someone else did not bring your name into it. You did.

And none of this is bullying.

[KBC]

@trubandloki

No, I did not forget @McGurk . Not at all. The point made by Sammy14, that I underlined was "until somebody else brought her name into it".
I added some bold to make it more clear and make it harder for you to ignore the point.
McGurk did not mention your name. McGurk mentioned an episode with no names.
You Manni, screamed ‘hey that is about me and that is not fair’. You put your name with the situation. Someone else did not bring your name into it. You did.

And none of this is bullying.

Very true Trub…seems clear enough to me…

Funny story, had a similar situation on another board (yes gasp horror I post elsewhere) where I made reference to ‘a poster’ and someone came along screaming victim…but I hadn’t even had them remotely in mind when I was making the post…they saw it, thought it fitted so they adopted it.

[SendenHorse]

I sooo miss the ignore button. seriously.

[sammy14]

@KBC

DAMMIT, reaches for new inhaler thingy as not to choke while laughing

Not a wet wipe ? (sorry,bad joke)

[KBC]

@sammy14

Not a wet wipe ? (sorry,bad joke)

So bad I don’t get it :no:

[sammy14]

@trubandloki

No, I did not forget @McGurk . Not at all. The point made by Sammy14, that I underlined was "until somebody else brought her name into it".
I added some bold to make it more clear and make it harder for you to ignore the point.
McGurk did not mention your name. McGurk mentioned an episode with no names.
You Manni, screamed ‘hey that is about me and that is not fair’. You put your name with the situation. Someone else did not bring your name into it. You did.

And none of this is bullying.

As i remember it Manni said she did NOT think it was about her at / until that point. I didn’t say mcgurk named her and said to mcgurk words to that effect.Is this not somewhat splitting hairs as it turns out the conversation was actually in part about her ?
Her name certainly came up but it can be changed to ‘until she was brought into it’ and be the same thing. Why do people have to be singled out all the time ? Its mean.

[trubandloki]

@sammy14

As i remember it Manni said she did NOT think it was about her at / until that point. I didn’t say mcgurk named her and said to mcgurk words to that effect.Is this not somewhat splitting hairs as it turns out the conversation was actually in part about her ?
Her name certainly came up but it can be changed to ‘until she was brought into it’ and be the same thing. Why do people have to be singled out all the time ? Its mean.

I do not get why you are not getting this.
No one was mean.
McGurk mentioned an incident.
Lots of posts on threads mention various things mentioned before on the forum.
Is it some how wrong to bring up things that happened in the past?
Is it only OK if those do not include someone who wants to scream it is them and then get upset that they identified themselves as the person in the incident?

Her name come up because SHE brought it up. No one else brought it up. She brought it up.
So she is mean for bringing up her own name?

Let me quote what you said in your other post, that I was responding to (with my underline):

@sammy

It wasn’t about her at all until somebody else brought her name into it,but since they have, she has the right of reply.

The point again is no one but her brought her name up.
There was a story. A general story as an example.
No name. No mention of a person. Nothing to make it scream a single person.
But then Manni jumped on and said it was about her.
No one else brought her name into it.

I do not know how to say it any more clear.

I thought of a way, but it took some research.
McGurk’s post is #69 and Manni’s response where she brings up the post is about her is post #70.