Quitting my Boring Day Job to Work in a Barn

[endlessclimb]

And, OP, by busting my tail for ‘the man’, I was able to take two months off to ride horses with a BNT full time, to prevent a ‘what if’. There I learned it’s not the life for me. Back to the cog in the mothership I went, and I enjoy horses as a hobby again.

The one thing you can control in all of the stuff at work is: your attitude. If you anticipate it being crappy - surprise surprise, it will be. Catch yourself in a negative thought spiral, and remove yourself from it. What are you thankful for? What are you going to do to solve the problems you have? You’re an engineer. You should be wired this way - there are no problems. Only solutions waiting to be found. Chin up, dig in, grind harder.

[MtnDrmz]

For so many of us, myself included, the best remedy for wanting to walk away from everything and work in horses, is to actually work in the industry. I LOVE horses, even though I barely ride anymore due to life, an injury, and burnout when I was younger. I love to watch, love to teach occasionally, love to spend time in the dirt. What I also love, is that it is now 100% a choice and a privilege. Everything becomes a “job” sooner or later, or at least aspects of it do. I wont tell you not to try, but I will tell you to be ready for a wake up call, and to present a better attitude to the outside world. The industry does not have time for that sort of personality, unless you are super rich, super talented and or a combo of both.

[Mac123]

@halt

what a wide blanket you’re casting. wow.

the way i see it, is that there is a lot of social change and progression, spurred in part by millenials - they have technology and tools that their prior generations never had. in my frank opinion? it threatens people… so they start to cast aspersions. it’s not a very convincing argument when your only evidence is to disparage an entire group of people.

lamenting a bygone generation is hardly a new thing. people have been kvetching about the next generation and how bad they are before the wheel was even invented.

You’re right, I should have said “most.” But I stand by what I said.

The attitude exhibited by this OP and many, many more (including my own brother, who is a millennial) support it. Just like this OP, most millennials care about their own personal fulfillment first. This creates the lack of ability to see things through, to be the cog in the wheel, to put in the hard work, whatever the case may be, because it isn’t fulfilling or doesn’t make them happy NOW.

Life isn’t always comfortable or fun or entirely fulfilling. It’s often not easy, it often is comprised by hard work, determination, and perseverance before any sort of reward. But we live in a culture that says that personal happiness, personal fulfillment, having fun, feeling like you’re making a difference - that all of that is most important. And it’s all inward and self-focused. And takes all of the personal responsibility out of the equation.

What’s sad to me, is that millennials have so much incredible promise. Like you said, they have technology and tools that former generations have never had. And yet many are not willing to dig their heels in and work through things when it’s hard.

[emmo]

@endlessclimb

There it is - the millennial issue. “I don’t like your opinion, therefore you should not have it.” Or, “I’m offended, so you should stop talking.”

Nope, it’s more like I don’t like the way you’re sharing you’re opinion (condescending, ridiculing etc) so I won’t expose myself to it. There is more than one way to deliver a message.

[emmo]

@jolise

Emmo, I understand where you are coming from. The desk job can become a grind. You are young and if you are not yet tied down to anything (husband, kids, etc) then I think you should go for it. Take a year off of the office , prepare to be broke and go have some fun. You don’t want to look back on this in 10-20 years and wish you would have done it. It will probably be a good experience. You may find that you miss the stability of the engineering job (or not!). Hopefully, you can find a position where you can travel a bit. If you hate it, well then back to plan B. I think you should do it, life is too short to be miserable.

Thank you. You don’t know until you try right? I’ll probably ease myself into it to gain more experience and see how I feel about it before I dive in.

[MtnDrmz]

One more thing OP- This question of where to go to look for barn related jobs and posters expressing the desire to leave their career, gets posed all the time on this board. You can search to find some of those threads. In them you will see some very thoughtful responses, and the basic theme of people strongly suggesting to stay in school, take that engineering job, do something that allows you to enjoy horses as a hobby. The responses you are getting are not unique and are predictable had a little research been done. I think the difference between what you are getting back this time around vs some of those other posters, is simply the way the question and info is being presented. Questions posed that clearly have some solid thought process behind them, even if you don’t know much about what you are asking, typically get thoughtful responses. Just as in regular life, you get respect when you show respect.

[emmo]

@MtnDrmz

I think the difference between what you are getting back this time around vs some of those other posters, is simply the way the question and info is being presented. Questions posed that clearly have some solid thought process behind them, even if you don’t know much about what you are asking, typically get thoughtful responses. Just as in regular life, you get respect when you show respect.

So because my question isn’t well thought out, it gives you the right to be disrespectful. Interesting logic!

[ladyj79]

@emmo

So because my question isn’t well thought out, it gives you the right to be disrespectful. Interesting logic!

Dude, you really have to stop. There is little wonder as to why you have no friends at work and hated everyone in the country of Australia and now want to go into an industry where no one knows you. But really, you can be a different person, I promise! You just have to want to be a different person who isn’t so angry and unpleasant.

[findeight]

No, because you didn’t provide any useful information of what you could offer an employer looking for barn help. Just all about you and your distaste for your current job and the people you work with. What makes you a good choice for a barn job?

[emmo]

@ladyj79

Dude, you really have to stop. There is little wonder as to why you have no friends at work and hated everyone in the country of Australia and now want to go into an industry where no one knows you. But really, you can be a different person, I promise! You just have to want to be a different person who isn’t so angry and unpleasant.

prime example of what I mean. What makes you say I have NO friends at work and hated EVERYONE in Australia? What do you tell yourself to make it OK for you to generalize, delete and distort information about someone else and then throw it at their face in a public forum?

[ladyj79]

@emmo

prime example of what I mean. What makes you say I have NO friends at work and hated EVERYONE in Australia? What do you tell yourself to make it OK for you to generalize, delete and distort information about someone else and then throw it at their face in a public forum?

Awful. And also you now appear to be making things up :lol: who on earth is deleting your information? Paranoid and unpleasant.

[ladyj79]

Please please don’t have horses. We have enough issues.

[endlessclimb]

When Bob has a problem with everyone, the problem is, in fact, Bob.

Taking ownership of things and having integrity is a critical piece of becoming… well, an ‘adult’ for lack of a better word. No one did this to you. You did. Make the best of the hand you’re dealt. Quit whining and blaming everyone else for your problem. Make it better, or quit.

Your call.

[endlessclimb]

Oh screw it. You’re a special someone who will be great in whatever you do. Everyone can be an astronaut if they work hard enough. Shoot for the stars! Someone will eventually give them to you, even if you miss. <3<3<3

[emmo]

@endlessclimb

When Bob has a problem with everyone, the problem is, in fact, Bob.

Taking ownership of things and having integrity is a critical piece of becoming… well, an ‘adult’ for lack of a better word. No one did this to you. You did. Make the best of the hand you’re dealt. Quit whining and blaming everyone else for your problem. Make it better, or quit.

Your call.

here we go again…more generalizing…Bob has a problem with EVERYONE. I have a problem with people who don’t know how to engage in respectful dialogue whether it’s online or in person.

I appreciate all the positive comments I’ve gotten in this thread as well as the PMs. I will not however, put up with bullying behavior no matter how old you are.

[cuatx55]

@emmo

here we go again…more generalizing…Bob has a problem with EVERYONE. I have a problem with people who don’t know how to engage in respectful dialogue whether it’s online or in person.

I appreciate all the positive comments I’ve gotten in this thread as well as the PMs. I will not however, put up with bullying behavior no matter how old you are.

Ahhhhhhh the B word, you had to go there?

Dude, we could really help you out, being professionals and having connections. But you are wasting your chance here by your behavior.

You need to take a step back and calm down. Us old fuddy duddies have a good understanding of how these threads work, I suggest you pick up a few tips and learn to use the resources here to your advantage.

[ladyj79]

I think if this person went back and re-read the progression of the thread and where things went tits up they might gain some valuable insight into their difficulty with interpersonal relationships.

[Scribbler]

@emmo

So because my question isn’t well thought out, it gives you the right to be disrespectful. Interesting logic!

It gives us the right to say you haven’t thought things through.

OP do you have any significant horse experience at all? You’ve never told us what you can do, and you’ve made a few slips in terminology that suggest you don’t know much.

And you’ve made more than a few statements that you don’t really want advice. Maybe what you want is for us to magic you away to an escape.

There is no escape from yourself. You have to change yourself.

I realize STEM graduates get about zero education in the humanities, but if you had some literature and history and sociology courses under your belt, you might have a bit more context for understanding things that are just a regular part of the struggle to become an adult.

OP, one of the things that probably contributed to getting folks backs up is coming onto a chat board full of pros in a field and showing that you imagine this very real field of hard work, low pay, and obsessive lifetime passion, to be an easy way for a disaffected, possibly depressed, young office worker who has apparently never done physical labor, to just take a holiday from adult life.

How arrogant is that?

As folks pushed for more clarification, you got more defensive.

I wasn’t sure at the start of the thread, when I treated you with more sympathy. I still understand where you are coming from because you seem an exact duplicate of many folks from my punk rock days in the 1980s.

I think you are going through the mid/late 20s slump that I mentioned earlier. I think you need some life coaching and career counselling, maybe some overall counseling.

People like you (I mean with your basic attitude) get jobs in barns all the time. They also generally quit after a few weeks, invariably at the most part inconvenient time for the barn manager, and usually after slacking off and getting into squabbles with all the other barn help.

Some times they are teens working off lessons. Sometimes they are in their 40s and living in an RV without water hookup on the back of the property, and collecting welfare on the side.

[Scribbler]

@emmo

here we go again…more generalizing…Bob has a problem with EVERYONE. I have a problem with people who don’t know how to engage in respectful dialogue whether it’s online or in person.

I appreciate all the positive comments I’ve gotten in this thread as well as the PMs. I will not however, put up with bullying behavior no matter how old you are.

Oh the B word!

Omg. We have all been Bs.

OP this is a regular occurrence on this board. Someone comes on, asks for advice. They get a range of pragmatic advice. They don’t like what they hear. They get defensive.

In response the other posters get either defensive back, or just more emphatic and outspoken.

Eventually the OP runs out of ammunition and uses the B word.

OP you are free to ignore posts that are not useful to you. The most productive way to shape a thread is to respond to the useful posts and ignore the ones that are not so useful.

Ignoring almost everything but snipping back at the people who mist get under your skin is the worst tactic for online debate.

Same same in real life, meetings or workplace or chats at parties.

[Scribbler]

@ladyj79

I think if this person went back and re-read the progression of the thread and where things went tits up they might gain some valuable insight into their difficulty with interpersonal relationships.

Yup.