Ridiculous things people say about your horses

[Sparrowette]

@Training Cupid

My coworker saying she didn’t realize horses could have personalities.

Yes to that.^^

My mare is the princess from “The Princess and the Pea”. One day I explained to a coworker how she will point with her nose to where on her side any wrinkle in the saddle pad might be. He was absolutely dumbfounded that a horse would communicate discomfort to an owner; he stood speechless for a full minute. When he came to, he said that he never thought a horse would do anything like that. But he’d only ever been on a dude string mount. I explained to him that those horses have a job, know it and are ok with it. He caught them while they were at work.

I have also had relatives from back east assume that the fly mask was sun protection for their eyes. Like horse sunglasses, but that would also protect against dust.

Then there was a waitress who thought that all horses should be wild and free. We should not be on their backs. (sigh.)

[Kwill]

My non-horsey husband, when I said, do you want to see a picture of the new horse? He said, “I think you showed me one already.” I said, ok, what color is he? Him – light brown? Horse is bay, I figured he had a 60% chance of getting that one right by guessing.

He’s a good sport, he has allergies to hay and barn dust, so he pretty much leaves me to my own devices.

[saddleup]

My sister-in-law was surprised to see that my horses know me. She came out to the barn, we walked out to see them and they ran up to the fence to say hello. She was amazed…“I can’t believe they KNOW you.”

When I assured her they can and do recognize people, she replied “So, they’re just like big dogs then.”

Whatever.

[clanter]

@dungrulla

I had a coworker who is horsey laugh at me and say I was ridiculous for dumping a few thousand into vet bills for a horse I can’t and will never be able to ride.

similar but all that stopped once they found three pockets of natural gas and a pool of oil under our horses’ pasture

[Training_Cupid]

Oh I have another one - people who think all hirses that lay down are dead.

We used to have horses in a large (several hundred acre) pasture by the road and about once a week someone came to let us know about a dead horse.

Of course one time we explained to them that that’s how they sleep, and the person said well then this horse has been sleeping for several days now…

[Herbaceous]

My mom likes to think she knows about horses. I’ve got a couple of gems from her:

I was telling her about how my coach’s TB is related to my favourite racehorse from when I was a kid, and how I’d seen a horse for sale who was also related to her. This ensued:

Me: It was cool to see a horse for sale who’s also related to Dance Smartly. But you know, I’m not really in the market for a horse right now.
Mom: You couldn’t ride a thoroughbred anyway.
Me: (somewhat taken aback) Er, the horse I ride in lessons every week is a TB.
Mom: Yeah, but he’s a mix, right?
Me: No, he’s 100% TB.
Mom: Well he’s pretty old, so I guess that’s how you ride him.

I’m not sure if my mom thinks I’m a horrible rider who couldn’t possibly manage a TB, or if she just thinks all TBs are fire-breathing dragons.

There was also this from a couple weeks ago:

Mom: When you buy a horse, you should either get a Canadian horse, or an Icelandic.

I have never sat on either of those breeds, but okay…

[shiloh]

From my mother: “How long have you been taking “lessons?” (insert heavy sarcasm) Shouldn’t you know how to ride by now?” Me: grrrrrrrr

Also from mummy dear - After coming home from a day where my horse had spent the entire time bolting, I was clearly frustrated and she just looked at me and said in this very condescending voice, “All those lessons and you STILL don’t know how to stop?” Huge exasperated sigh - “Just pull back on the reins and say whoa.” Hey, no sh** Sherlock. head desk head desk

[supaflyskye]

I get a LOT of people, even a lot of horse people, talking about how “huge” my gelding is.
He’s really not that big though, as far as horses go…he’s actually sort of a little guy by many standards – 15.3hh & 1100lbs in full fitness. Granted, he does have a very long neck (half Saddlebred), so he can make himself look quite tall when he wants to. & I guess he just has a big presence.

Of course…there were also some folks I rode w/ for a time who repeatedly insisted to me that I was too big to ride him, and constantly went on about how tiny he was for me & how I should sell him to buy a bigger horse. Experienced horse people insisting this! That definitely seemed pretty ridiculous & confusing to me. I mean, I’m 5’8" w/ long legs, but very “petite” in my build; & these people were convinced not just that I looked too big on him, but that I was too big for him. I really do not even think I look big on him (& save that group of riders/trainers, nobody else has really thought so either) – he’s very wide through the back & takes up a lot of leg. That whole situation was just so weird.

[ohmylivia]

An acquaintance once asked me if they could teach a lesson to their friend (who had never sat on a horse before) using my horse.

Because when I think “what horse should a complete beginner ride?” I think of the 17.1hh showjumper in full training.

[ecileh]

Once, at a hunter pace, an elderly gentleman came up to me and said something to the effect of that’s a nice stallion you have–I hope he doesn’t give you any trouble.

I smiled down at him and said “Oh, no, she’s a good girl.”

He was incredulous and insisted that my mare HAD to be a stud because–and I quote–“God don’t make girl horses that big!”

[stargzng386]

My mom came out to meet my yearling and granted it is my first baby I’ve owned. I brought him out and she was asking questions about what do I do with him until I can ride him. I started showing her some basic groundwork, talked about ground driving. She looked at me amazed and asked me how I knew all of this…ummm I’ve been riding for my whole life, you did pay for all of the lessons in middle and highschool. I wasn’t talking about how to saddle break him just basic leading, desensitizing etc. Do you think I’ve owned horses for 10 years, ridden for 17 years and don’t know how to do anything? It was just weird.

[Gray_Horse_H_J]

I thought of a couple more. The coworker stories made me think of them.

One lady was convinced horses can’t lie down. She said she saw some show on TV where they said if a horse lies down its legs will break, and then you have to shoot it. She didn’t believe me that horses can absolutely lie down, so I had to find a picture of my horse napping to prove it to her.

Another coworker saw a video I posted on Facebook from a recent show and was totally impressed - at the horse. She asked me how we teach the horses to memorize which jumps to go to. I told her the rider memorizes the course and then steers the horse to the jumps - I was trying to oversimplify my explanation as best I could. She was shocked and said she had no idea you steer the horse, she thought you just sit up there and “hold on tight”. Facepalm.

[jumperanonymous]

I had a picture of me on a 16.3 chestnut on my desk at work and my boss laughed and said the horse looked tiny. I’m 5’6" and 135, so I fit on him just fine. I said “How big do you think horses are?”

Another time a work colleague went on vacation and did a trail ride. He came back and raved about how hard it was and that he couldn’t believe I could jump a horse, let alone keep it from wondering off and eating grass (which is what happened to him).

I’ve shown pictures of me showing the 2’9" jumpers to colleagues and they have said “Wow you look so professional! Are you going to the Olympics??” I take it as a compliment, but its so funny how people are clueless.

I have been asked if I race before, and also if I wear a cowboy hat.

I find it funny when non horsey people ask what bred a horse is. I humor them and answer but I know they don’t know what it means.

I always get asked “What’s a warmblood?”

[jumperanonymous]

One more… I was visiting a friend who rode at a saddlebred farm and the one trainer (who obviously didn’t ride anymore) asked me if I rode, I said yes, hunter/jumpers. She said oh, well all you have to do is grip with you knees.

WHAT???

[Dramapony_misty]

I get the “why do you still need riding lessons?” thing all the time. I have started calling my lessons “coaching sessions”. For some reason, people get coaching/training better than lessons.

[Princess_Sparkles]

@Sparrowette

I have also had relatives from back east assume that the fly mask was sun protection for their eyes. Like horse sunglasses, but that would also protect against dust.

Sorry but they aren’t entirely wrong about this?? While fly masks do protect against bugs, you certainly can (and I always do) purchase ones that have UVA/UVB protection as well. I figure if my horse is wearing a mask it might as well protect her eyes from the sun as well. And I have a boarder’s horse with eye issues that wears a mask specifically designed for sunlight protection (I can’t remember the brand right now but it’s the one with the cups over the eyes that makes them look like a fly, lol).

There are also plenty of people who use fly masks during an eye injury to keep dust/dirt out and protect against sunlight, or people who have their horses wear masks year round for the same reason. . . usually horses with moonblindness or recurring uveitis or whatever.

[mmeqcenter]

From horse people “I don’t believe you, your mare HAS to be taller than 16.1! She’s huge!”
No, she just stands at full attention at all times and is beefy. I’ve measured her a million times. She’s 16.1hh. But you’re right.

[Simkie]

@ohmylivia

An acquaintance once asked me if they could teach a lesson to their friend (who had never sat on a horse before) using my horse.

Because when I think “what horse should a complete beginner ride?” I think of the 17.1hh showjumper in full training.

Ha, this reminds me:

Posted on a local FB page looking for a mower repair guy. Got a message from someone who said he could do the work, cheap, blah blah blah, which is kind of odd, because hey–don’t you want to get paid? After some back and forth, he said “so you have horses? yeah, I’ll bring my wife to come ride.” Was confused when I told him I didn’t have the kind of horses just anyone could hop on!

[KittyinAus]

@Sparrowette

I have also had relatives from back east assume that the fly mask was sun protection for their eyes. Like horse sunglasses, but that would also protect against dust.

Then there was a waitress who thought that all horses should be wild and free. We should not be on their backs. (sigh.)

For headshaking horses with their uv rated fly masks, you could argue that they are sun glasses.

Had a bus driver who was against all companion animals, try to tell me that I should let my horse loose out of his paddock to fend for himself. (Knew the local bus drivers back then because I caught the bus regularly.)

Remembered another one.

Had a horse dentist try to tell that my horse who towers over me (5’4") is only 15.3hh. He’s 16.2hh, maybe even a tad taller. I haven’t sticked him yet.

[Rackonteur]

@ParadoxFarm

Funny. When I would take my gray OTTB mare to trail rides, more than once I had people say something like, "I like your Ap (Appaloosa). And another rider commented on my appaloosa. ?? I completely didn’t get it. She was a 16.1 typical-looking gray TB mare. I have an Ap/Trak now and they looked nothing alike.

I saw a photo of the lovely dapple-grey horse belonging to a friend of a friend of mine. Caption below the photo? “Blue roan mare.” Guess current owner wasn’t around when mare was foaled not grey and hasn’t had her long enough to notice any age-related color changes.

Reminded me of the sales ads I see online for “palomino” Haflingers.