I did that at my first “big” event at Ram Tap. Went into dressage phase on a miserably hot day, smiled brilliantly at the judge for my first salute, and my upper lip got stuck on my dry teeth. I had a big rictus grin on my face until the very end of the ride when I could finally use my hand to unstick my lip.
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I have a treasure trove of stories, but I gotta say, this cracked me up. It’s like something that would happen to me, for sure. Glad we can laugh at ourselves!
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Way back when (2009) I took my mare to our first recognized dressage show. It was held at a private barn and was kind of a last-minute thing. My trainer came with me, and I trailered a more advanced horse for one of her clients, who got the last of her Bronze medal scores that day.
I was not quite so successful. The tests were held in the indoor arena, which was the size a full dressage court, so we were allowed a minute of warm-up in the arena before the bell rang… To one side of this arena, there was an aisle and a bunch of stalls, and a wash stall just across the aisle from “E”. Several of the barn people were showing, so the wash stall was getting a lot of use. There was a door to the arena there that could have been closed, but it wasn’t.
My mare became absolutely 100% convinced that there were Monsters at E. She has never been fond of wash stalls, and there she could see, 20 feet away, a wash stall with a horse she didn’t know being hosed down. Her response was to teleport sideways any time we got close to E. Or start to rear and then teleport. Or spin and teleport. So our “circles at E” all resembled horseshoes, and the entire test was very tense.
After complaints from off-site competitors, they closed the door for her second test, and then she was upset because she couldn’t see the wash stall. It wasn’t as bad a test, but certainly had its moments.
I was riding my mare in a 2’9 adult am hunter class. To say it was a disaster would be an understatement. I forgot my course. Proceeded to jump an oxer backward. Mare didn’t appreciate it, over jumped, I was launched, somehow in the process my stirrups came off my saddle, BOTH stirrups. Horse is now at the far end of the ring. Pick myself up, grab the one stirrup leather I can see nearby, the judge kindly points out where the second one is located, and then I get the horse at the far end of the ring.
We did return and complete our second course and made it around. 
In the undersaddle we actually pinned. The horse was a lovely mover but had no presence in the ring so rarely was noticed as a bay horse in a field of bays. I guess she was noticed due to our earlier performance or it was a pitty ribbon, either way it improved the day.
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Here is an old thread from the Dressage forum; Spinoff - Crazy Things That Have Happened To You In The Show Ring
Here is an old thread from the Dressage forum; Spinoff - Crazy Things That Have Happened To You In The Show Ring
The fact that it’s called a “spin off” just hits a little too close to home for me to venture that click 
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It was a fun thread. 
Years ago I was competing at an annual charity show. It was kind of a social affair combined with a horse show. After the flat portion of the hunter hack class, I lined up alongside one of my old friends and we were yakking while the judge was explaining the routine for the jumping portion of the class.
As luck would have it, I was first to go. I trotted out of the line-up, picked up the canter, turned into the line of jumps and… jumped them the wrong way, including the oxer, which I jumped backwards. 
I was so embarrassed.
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Eons ago, I was at an event, all by myself. There were multiple dressage rings being run right next to each other, so I was already nervous about hearing the bell (or whatever noise it was that was assigned to my particular arena). I thought I heard it, so I trotted up the center line, made my turn at C, came out of the corner and promptly trotted right back out of the arena. I was convinced that I’d heard the wrong bell, because the judge absolutely never looked up throughout my entire centerline or the turn at C.
Said judge called me over and asked why I had left. I explained, slightly horrified, that I thought I had entered in error since they never looked up through the entirety of the first two movements. I was allowed to re-start my test (to the tune of an abysmal score).
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Most recent dressage judge comment: “you know you can’t just circle wherever you want!” Said in an exasperated tone after I went off course. With a reader. 
Exit at A, tail between legs…
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A few years ago, I was doing an Intro A test with my 4 year old (his first test) at our in-house schooling show. The barn owner asked if I wanted her to read the test for me, but I was all, no way, it’s just Intro A, it has like five movements. And then proceeded to completely wander off course after turning off the centerline.
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The first “event” I ever went to, a little schooling thing… I started out great in the dressage test. Then the ‘cross country’ - this was a baby event so you didn’t even have to jump anything out there. I am on a horse that is dead broke to anything you want on the trails. And I mean anything. But! there are people (judges) lurking in the trees. And when we got to the water, forget it. Then, the show jumping phase. All the poles were painted colors, and at home they were only white. Mare refused every. single. one. Needless to say we ended up DQ’d.
Another show, another horse. Outdoors, dressage test. Train goes by the back of the property, so far away why it should even be noticed is beyond me… but horse sees it and does an exit stage left and I end up upside down on my head. On video, of course. Schooling show, allowed to restart test. Get to that same spot and horse flat plants feet. Ended up having a friend come in and grab bridle and lead us past “that spot”. Then horse was fine.
Another show, same horse, took down the dressage court. Balking and being an idiot and got too close to the rope and down it came.
Yet another show… got on, could not get off. Seriously. I was better off just trying to ride it out, wouldn’t stand still anyway. By the time it came for our test, we rode into the aisleway to the arena, to find a group of turkeys!!! OMG I think my life flashed before my eyes… and horse just stood there like yeah so what?
Honestly I don’t have any good show stories. Had a little fun here n there but mostly they were all bad or ugly.
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After a particularly bad Hunter round at a schooling show, Friend/Trainer grabbed a blue, handed it to me & said “Just go home now!”
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hahaha!
Having tests read:
Not me, but I recall watching the dressage test of a young gal who asked her parent to read the test for her.
Clueless parent started reading and just kept going without any pauses. By the time the kid had halted at X for first salute, parent was completely done reading the test.
Opposite problem, a parent reading and coaching thru the test. “Enter, halt at X, Salute. Halt at X. No, all the way up to X, then Halt.”
I was running that event and had to DQ the rider because of the parent. Ouch.
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I was doing a test on an OTTB once and really focusing, head down, staring at his head willing it to stay down as one does as I trotted across the diagonal I felt him stiffen and the head raise. Dammit it’s all falling apart! Look up finally and there are three deer in the arena right in our way. Judge commented “distracted 
”
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Two more:
I was doing my first 2.6’’ show on my trusty gelding, but he for some reason felt spooked at the unfamiliar (to him) showgrounds, so, when we got to the arena, he was balking like his life depended on it. He jumped every jump clean, but no matter how much leg I put on, he did it slower than the paint dries. As I was slo-mo cantering by the spectators, I, to my utter embarrassment, heard them cheering us up - “Faster, horsie! You can do it! Faster!”
We finished last. Clean - he didn’t touch a single pole - but last.
And second one did not directly happen to me, but to a close friend who got to ride her trainers’ young and very nervous mare at the mares’ first Dressage show. Everything went relatively normal and they even got placed. So, the time comes when a ring person comes up to attach the rosette to the mares’ bridle, asking if she would be okay with that. Sure, my friend answers with confidence.
Well, as soon as the wind blew the ribbons into the mares’ eye, she freaked out and went spinning, galloping and bucking right down the centreline. My friend valiantly held on, but soon hit the dust, and…it was all documented. Because she had given me her camera and I was bound to document every single moment of it. 
The mare proceeded to gallop all over the grounds with people shouting to shut the gates, dismount and hold their horses, and I had not realized my friend was capable to display such a intense shade of red on her face. Coincidentally, I was finally the one who caught her mare when she was going her ump-teenth lap around the grounds and I started crinkling the plastic packet of rubber bands I had in my pocket. She thought I had snacks.
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I have sooo many bad show stories, I have terrible luck at horse shows lol.
One time my poor mother was watching me warm up and decided to try to sit on the (pretty low) fence and it SNAPPED and broke super loudly, spooking multiple horses & resulting in me and at least one other person falling off 
luckily everyone was fine, though I did decide to skip the jump round I was warming up for after falling off lol.
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I was at a derby cross event with my mare: you know, a combination of the SJ and XC phases of eventing.
We were getting ready to enter the ring for our round when “LOOSE HORSE” came over the speaker. I looked around to see the loose horse barreling right for us.
My mare used to have an erratic bolt in her. So at this point a stream of expletives is going through my head as I tried to figure the best course of action, knowing there was a good chance she would try to join the loose horse. Jump off? Stay on? Try to run away from the loose horse? Stay still? I took a page from my racehorse days and put her butt to the rail of the arena and stood turned out. Miraculously, she didn’t bat an eye as the horse whizzed past us uncomfortably close.
I thought it was crisis averted. Of course, I was on deck and didn’t have much time to get my heart rate down before heading on course myself.
We got out on the XC portion of the course and she was not herself. She was sucking back at every fence. The loose horse incident was still on my mind.
We came to a little table. She tried to stop. I went to the stick. She jumped it like a deer, but caught her toe on the lip of the table. The table wasn’t anchored and flipped over, getting caught between her legs. She kind of crow hopped around as she tried to kick it away. I lost my seat. As I was falling I realized my foot was hung in the stirrup. I was frantically trying to kick it free, mentally preparing myself for getting drug. My foot came free, but I landed on my head. Thank goodness for helmets. All while hearing “LOOSE HORSE” for the second time in the span of maybe 5 minutes as my horse took off erratically back to the trailers. Luckily she stopped when she saw my friend who she recognized.
That was not a good day.
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My first ever show, at the age of 15 (and mare’s first ever show). Very windy day, we trot down the centreline, almost get to C, and half the arena surrounds blows over. Poor horse jumped almost out of the arena, decided it was maybe not going to kill her and we proceeded to get a reasonably respectable score for a first time!
More recently, we went to a fun day to try out Working Equitation (if you’re unfamiliar, from my limited knowledge, think obstacle courses for horses!). Riding same above horse, who these days is quite unflappable and actually really enjoyed it all. Anyway, we are doing an obstacle that invloved holding a very long stick…my horse is totally ok with it all. Go to hand the stick to another rider…I drop it, her horse freaks out to the point where she feels the need to jump off and I’m left feeling exceptionally embarrassed that I caused such an issue! Other horse took a long time to go anywhere near the stick after that 
Another, I was 16, at a casual schooling show with a few middle aged ladies from my barn. One asks if I would mind just hopping on and walking her mare around in the trailer area just to get her moving. Ok, no problemo, horse is a lovely soul. Show organiser comes up to me and proceeds to yell her head off…apparently rules don’t allow such things! Fair enough if it’s against the rules…but as a grown woman, screaming at a teenager in public when a simple “hey, you may not be aware that’s actually not allowed” would have sufficed. I should note I had other organisers apologise to me for her behaviour.
Same woman a year later at a jump training day, where my horse was having a bad day and did.not.want.to.jump, proclaimed loudly to everyone “gosh how DANGEROUS that rider is” (horse simply politely ducked out at jumps), her daughter then proceeded to literally crash through every single jump.
Yes…that woman had a reputation and still does to this day!
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Was at an eventing derby with my late mare, who was a fire breathing dragon to the fences. The course was super fun and she was attacking everything I pointed her at.
We came off the little hill they had, and there was a jump at the bottom. Me, being so proud of myself that she and I had successfully navigated it at a reasonable speed and not at Mach 1, for a fleeting second I forgot which fence I was going to next.
Mare says “no problem, I’ll pick one”.
She locked on to the fence that was straight ahead, about 10 strides out. At that moment I realized that the correct next fence was the one at a 45degree angle to the right, also about 10 strides out. Mare was NOT HAVING IT and stayed locked onto the fence in front of her. A pulling matched ensued, where she was telling me to stuff it, THIS fence, the one she had her eye on, was next. Three strides up, I surrendered the fight, softened, and we jumped the (wrong) fence beautifully.
The announcer saw exactly what happened and was choking back laughter as I was eliminated.
If that wouldn’t have happened, we likely would have come in 3rd. On some days, I miss that mare.
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