Sleep issues. HELP!

[candyappy]

@Willesdon

One problem with the easy availability of wearable health technology and home testing machines is that people stress about their results - often for no real reason. Blood Pressure is actually very hard to measure with any accuracy. Age, sex, time of day, general fitness, emotional state, location, genetics, even sight of a medical white coat etc etc are just some of the variables that affect B/P. It will vary precisely because it is ones body adapting to environmental conditions.

This reminds me of when my husband was supposed to take his BP ( i can’t remember now exactly why) at certain times every day and keep track of the results for his doctor.

Well right from the start he had issues with the machine and getting the cuff on right and staying on which made him lose his temper, move around etc… I tried to calm him down but of course his readings were all over the place and he did it like 10 times in a row trying to get an acceptable reading

I swear it was a morning and evening ritual I wish to forget. Eventually he got it sorted out and his readings were fine.

[hoopoe]

I dont know where you are or what it would take, but I think you need to get away from this doctor and to one with more compassion and diligence. Even if it means an hour drive or more

there are so many things that can be at issue here, but she is not working for you and your grabbing at straws without a clear path

long term mental health is there a basis of cardiac performance that might be contributing to these issues. Undiagnosed AF or other rhythm or perfusion issues. True sleep apnea or other disorder.

Hemp based CBD is legal most everywhere. It is not only found in Marijuana derived products. I didnt like the hangover effect of the MJ based tinctures. Charlottes Web is one of the founding companies. That, combined with Melatonin really helped with getting through the night. Most products can be mail order. Some better drug stores carry it as well

even medications he may have been taking for some time can start having side effects. Over the counter meds can contribute as well. Talk to the pharmacy and see if they can check what he is taking both Rx and OTC and make sure there is not an insomnia side effect that might be driving his issue ( combinations or medication alone) . Pharmacists should be able to do this easily , they have the database and schooling. It might take some time as most pharmacies these days seem stretched thin

Personally, I think folks over 50 should be going to Internists, not GPs and not “family Practitioners” Internists have a focused practice on the needs of older patients. I love mine, I think she really listens.

[NancyM]

The book he has is The Secret. It helped a lot when things were bad 7 years ago. He still re reads it regularly. He’s trying. A psych nurse recommended it, and went through it chapter by chapter. She was pretty worried about him at the time. You can’t erase history, you’ve got to learn to live with it.
Other than that, you are dead right about his early life. I’m ‘done’ speaking to his mommy at all due to what she did to his childhood. He’d freak if he knew I was telling you this, it’s deadly secret, i did not know myself the extent of it for years.
The CBD is a gummy, for sleep. Idk what it’s called. No THC. One of the few stores our crappy little town actually has is a pot shop. It’s quite busy.

On the positive side, the truck was thawed out after its ride on the tow truck, drove home just fine, and lives to fight another day. And it was not expensive. She’s old, but still kickin.

[NancyM]

If only it were as easy as getting another doc. But yes, apparently our village nurse (who we like and was equally horrified about the doctor) was apparently going to try to get him changed to the OTHER doc at this one and only clinic that we managed to get accepted by after having NO GP and using walk in clinics for several years, after our stellar GP had a stroke and was forced into retirement. We are actually considered lucky to even have this clinic. All doctors they have come from South Africa…not that that matters, but it’s hard to get through the accent. Other people in this province with serious health issues have been taking out adverts begging for access to a GP, offering cash to someone who will take on responsibility for their access to service. It’s pretty scary. I guess it’s pretty bad in lots of other places too.

[NancyM]

I agree.

[NancyM]

This is a new BPM. Old one was making crazy readings… Checked it with the local nurse (who is a superstar nurse). New one is good.

[JB]

@NancyM

The book he has is The Secret.

that’s a fantastic book. There are so many books now that help deal with past mental or physical trauma. Anything by Brene Brown is so so good for helping deal with feelings of blame and shame, she’s a great “shame researcher”

[hoopoe]

Ah, so @NancyM, you are not in the US. Sorry about the CBD info.

Does your husband drink? Wine causes me to have insomnia. Even one glass will have me awake in a few hours after going to sleep and good luck getting back to sleep .

I had a coworker with insomnia issues. Her doctor recommended a protein snack at bed time

[NancyM]

Not much or often. Sometimes one beer in hot summer. Occasionally a glass of wine. Nothing hard. He’s a health nut, alcohol is counter to that.

I just wanted to add that he KNOWS that I have asked for help here for him, I do read him the answers that you all have contributed. I’ve let slip a few things here that he would consider personal, but he does not read here (not too interested in horsie message boards), and I felt they were important and part of his issues that contribute to this problem. So, if you know us, or ever meet us, please keep quiet about this. He would be embarrassed, which is kinda the opposite of what we need to do to help him.

[jherold]

I know this is weird, but it helped a friend who was a chronic insomniac with restless leg issues, and it costs nothing to try. Does your bed cause your husband to lie north and south or east and west? If north and south, rotate it so you are sleeping east and west. It something about being perpendicular to the earth’s magnetic poles.

[S1969]

Just reading this; not a lot to offer other than that I’ve had RLS my whole life. While iron supplementation helps, the main cause (by far) is fatigue. So, while that is totally useless because if he’s already not sleeping, it doesn’t help to know he should sleep.

But - it might help him to know that it is common for RLS to become an issue when someone is fatigued and not sleeping well. So rather than it being a “new problem” - it may just be another symptom of the same issue, and can be ignored to some extent unless it changes. If it’s a new issue for him, it may disappear as soon as he starts getting more recuperative sleep.

[Bluey]

@S1969

Just reading this; not a lot to offer other than that I’ve had RLS my whole life. While iron supplementation helps, the main cause (by far) is fatigue. So, while that is totally useless because if he’s already not sleeping, it doesn’t help to know he should sleep.

But - it might help him to know that it is common for RLS to become an issue when someone is fatigued and not sleeping well. So rather than it being a “new problem” - it may just be another symptom of the same issue, and can be ignored to some extent unless it changes. If it’s a new issue for him, it may disappear as soon as he starts getting more recuperative sleep.

Sleep studies at the hospital, that one night, they wire your legs also.
RLS, legs twitching, is part of the sleep apnea diagnosis for some patients.
Like snoring, not necessarily so, but common enough that they test for it.

[JB]

@S1969

I’ve had RLS my whole life. While iron supplementation helps, the main cause (by far) is fatigue.

have you had your B12 level checked? Getting that into better shape helped my RLS the most

[S1969]

I haven’t but I do supplement sometimes (when I remember).

Honestly - my RLS is odd, it’s almost all about sleep. If I stay up too late, it starts. If I wake up in the middle of the night and can’t fall asleep, it will start. If I stay in bed too long, it will start.

As long as I’m careful about sleep patterns, I rarely have any symptoms. But as soon as I start messing around with my sleep schedule, it begins. Tricky these days as I have a relatively new SO who is a late riser, late to bed guy. His normal schedule is 11-11:30pm bedtime, and 8:00 wake on a workday (works from home.). I’ve been more of a 9:30-10:00 bedtime, 5:30 wake time for the last few years. Friday nights can be a challenge if we try to watch TV or a movie. I’ve never had RLS as often as I’ve had lately.

Maybe I’ll just start taking B12 anyway. Can’t hurt, might help!

[Willesdon]

Bed socks. No bed socks = restless, unhappy feet. I do find it odd but it is almost as if the bed socks tell my feet where they are.

[JB]

There are actual studies saying that people with socks in bed have warmer feet and sleep better.

[NancyM]

He’s got the sleep center equipment to test for sleep apnea. Gonna try it tonight. He has little hope that he’s going to get to sleep with this stuff in place. Maybe I’ll tell him to put his socks on. Those merino wool socks that he loves, that he wears constantly for the last year plus, with no wear apparent LOL. He got along with the doctor better on the second visit. She agreed that the anti anxiety medication was not as good a plan as she had previously thought, but put him on the BP stuff that is the first “go to” for higher BP spikes. It was spiked again when he was there, but far lower earlier in the day. Being on the medication may be only short term, or maybe not. The person he talked to at the sleep center has been on this same stuff for years, no issues, no side effects. Apparently, coughing is a side effect. He hasn’t coughed yet. He’s out riding his fat bike right now, up and down the driveway in the snow. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.

[OnAMission]

Is there something going on in his head that could have triggered him and upset the apple cart? Holidays, dark days (you’re north of me as I recall), something that might have just tipped him one way and now he’s caught in the cycle? Maybe I missed it above but bloodwork for Vit D maybe? He sounds like he’s always kind of fighting to defend his health and this has him stressed out so now it’s making its own weather. Meditation and relaxation really can help.

My easy fixes for myself are magnesium, Vit D (including a light), and I listen to podcasts at night, the droning story just knocks me out. I listen to anything from dateline to 20/20 to sleep hypnosis to a nice lady reading Pride and Prejudice… as long as it drones on and on. The leg issue makes me think magnesium. Then stress, then brain and off we go. If I wake up and it’s quiet my brain attacks me, the crazy podcasts get me past it.

My DH is deep into treatment for severe sleep apnea and a CPAP wasn’t an option for him. Mine sleeps like a dead log while he chokes out though so not super relative. He had the at home sleep study equipment a few weeks ago and looked like ET in the middle of the night when I rolled over and saw him. lol you’ll know it when you see it.

[NancyM]

His brain never shuts off… always active, often torturing him I think, and it’s a vicious circle. Can’t shut down sometimes. And if he’s not feeling well, it’s magnified. But he’s feeling better now, getting some sleep, which helps. He was feeling light headed, dizzy etc too previously, he reported today. I don’t know these things if he doesn’t tell me, I just think he’s cranky. His blood work came back as “ideal” in every way, everything within healthy parameters, LOW cholesterol (the doctor had said that no doubt it would be high because in North America, everyone eats too much red meat so all are high- WHAT??? His was low). Red blood cell count was a bit high, but we live at some elevation. Doctor had not seen such healthy blood in some time, was shocked. Should not have been, he LOOKS healthy and fit. I think the CBD has helped him relax, but I don’t think he’s still taking it now. He thinks the new BP medication is making a big difference even though it is only a small dose, thinks it is making him feel better. Doctor told him that it would take effect right away, did not need to build up in his system. He doesn’t like taking ANY medication, for ANYTHING, EVER, but he sure appreciates feeling more like himself.
So I don’t know if it is a BP thing, or a sleep deprivation thing, or anxiety, sleep apnea, or a combination of several of these things causing everything else, and it doesn’t sound like anyone else who is a doctor we have access to knows this either. IDK if coming off the medication is going to make it all come back, or not. Doctor doesn’t seem to know this either. He has a few days of getting the home data for the sleep center people, then sees them again next week I think. They are rather disappointed with their contact with the doctor, and the doctor’s office staff so far, but agree with the BP medication. It all seems to be quite a bit of hocus pocus, this sleep issues treatment stuff.

We are a bit north here, and shorter days are a thing we notice in winter. However, we get a lot of sunshine, bright days on snowy white fields, clean fresh air and clear blue skies etc. Not the cloudy gray days and constant rain of the coast and south of us… we are in the rainshadow of the coastal mountains. We escaped that $hitty coastal weather that is so unhealthy for both humans and horses 14 years ago…

[NancyM]

This morning’s update… he slept WELL last night, all night. Probably the first time he’s got that done in a month or so. Feeling better than he has for a while. He forgot to put the sleep monitor thing on. He does not think that he has sleep apnea, and feels that the sleep clinic just wants to sell sleep apnea machines. IDK if he is right about this, but there it is. He thinks that most people have an ulterior motive… skeptical. Sometimes he’s right about this, sometimes not.