Suburban boarding barn....Ideas for neighbor relations and safety

[Sleipnir]

Which reminds me of the time I was working at a lesson barn/breeding operation and noticed, from a distance, a couple spreading a picnic sheet and starting to assemble their romantic meal in the very middle of a stallions’ paddock. This guy was NOT kind to strangers and the couple had to sneak through three fencelines of electric wire and solid boards!

As I ran to them at a lightning speed before the stud had made their way up to them (fortunately, he was at the far side of the rather large paddock), and instructed them (not kindly) to get the eff out, the couple was extremely confused - they had only hoped to have a nice picnic with the pretty black horsey!

And somehow it seemed absolutely normal to them to hike to the paddock from the forest line, not approach the barn from the driveway like normal people would do, and haphazardly climb through three electrically reinforced fences…

[eightpondfarm]

Unreal! and they were adults!
When i was a child, a horse-crazy little girl, there were no horses on any of the neighboring farms…but there were hogs! And neighbor farmer had to come and lecture my mother to keep me better contained as i had been caught riding their hogs. She pressed upon my mom how dangerous that was.
I was maybe 6 or 7? And obviously ‘riding’ bareback.
It was shortly thereafter that my folks enrolled me in a riding academy.
…but that did not keep me from sneaking out my window at night and going and climbing aboard another neighboring farmer’s plow mules. One of them was very friendly and would sidle up to the fence for an apple… (in the middle of the night)

[TheJenners]

I dont understand why the need to be nice. It is YOUR liability and your home you will lose should you be sued.

I take this very seriously, as I happen to LIKE my home.

After I booted a woman from my farm after she demanded I allow her grandkids to pet my donkeys, I put up a gate and signs.

[eightpondfarm]

When you’re mean to your neighbors, especially neighbors with kids, they kids can do some horrible things to the ‘mean’ neighbor. When i was growing. up there was a farmer who was roundly disliked. Some of the boys once taped a big firecracker to one of the goat’s horns and blew a piece of his head off. They can also put bad food out there for your horses or sheep or cattle. Can shoot bb guns at them, etc. Plus they can smash your mailbox with a baseball bat.

[Alterration]

I don’t technically have to be nice. But as @eightpondfarm so eloquently put it, not being nice to the kids can be problematic.

Not being nice to the parents can be equally problematic. We are grandfathered into a residentially zoned area that is 99% developed. This means that these folks don’t get manure, flies, tractors, fences, or anything else that a horse farm brings. I don’t need trouble from Animal Control (we have very fat horses, but it is a small acreage) complaints about mud, the timing of my tractor usage, the manure pile, nor any other of the crazy things that seem perfectly rational to farm peeps but would horrify city folk.

I have a full time job plus I run a boarding facility - I do not need that hassle. It’s already hecking expensive to run a facility right now.

[TheJenners]

@eightpondfarm

Some of the boys once taped a big firecracker to one of the goat’s horns and blew a piece of his head off.

That’s not an issue with the mean neighbor, that’s an issue of sociopathic children without proper supervision.

Also you read “mean” when I said “why the need to be nice.” Read again. The opposite of not-nice might be mean, but there is a lot between the two such as firm, cool, straight-forward, clear, etm.

[eightpondfarm]

ok fine. You didn’t imply it was a good thing to be mean to your neighbors.

I’m just trying to tell you guys exactly the kinds of things i’ve seen bad kids do when they ‘hate’ a neighbor. Stomp down new shrubs, or a flower garden… Bashing mailboxes is what the new driving teens do around here for fun. It’s just never a good idea to be on the bad side of a neighbor or neighborhood.
OP is in a precarious position…certainly not one of strength. There are way more of them than there are of her. And the safety of all the horses under her care hang in the balance. Hopefully she’ll engender good will and have folks around her that feel protective of the jewel they have in their midst, rather than be antagonistic.

[Alterration]

@TheJenners

Also you read “mean” when I said “why the need to be nice.” Read again. The opposite of not-nice might be mean, but there is a lot between the two such as firm, cool, straight-forward, clear, etm.

Yes, this is true, however “firm straightforward and clear” can be interpreted as “mean” very easily. Boundaries can also. Have you seen any of the tongue-in-cheek videos teachers put out about how they are treated by parents?

It’s a fine line. People don’t think they are doing anything wrong and resent highly being told they are, no matter how it’s put. It’s the adults that are the worst. Kids are fairly moldable.

[TheJenners]

@eightpondfarm

ok fine. You didn’t imply it was a good thing to be mean to your neighbors.

Thank you.

@Alterration

Yes, this is true, however “firm straightforward and clear” can be interpreted as “mean” very easily.

Sure it can, look at this board. But in person, you can smile.

[eightpondfarm]

@Alterration

It’s the adults that are the worst. Kids are fairly moldable.

when children overhear their parents badmouthing somebody, they take it in and run-with-it given the chance. This was the case in the area where i grew up. Some friend’s mother had a disagreement with some neighbor, and stated so over ice tea while we were swimming and we heard that. From then on…like then-on forEVER, that neighbor woman was an enemy. Children huh? They are people in process…just trying/learning how to be a good member of the tribe.

[chestnutmarebeware]

There’s a very long and alarming thread in the Archive about this very issue. It was called “Child in my Pasture—WWYD?” and it’s worth reading to be reminded what vindictive children are willing to do to animals and their owners when they’re thwarted by someone and not under control by a responsible adult.

[Jealoushe]

You wont want to be nice if your horse ends up dead. This is common issue in the UK. Horses routinely killed from people feeding them things they shouldn’t. I would also worry about teenagers at night drunk thinking its a good idea to go ride a horse.

I think electric fencing around your property outside your normal fencing, plus cameras and signs is really the only way to go.

[Alterration]

@Jealoushe

You wont want to be nice if your horse ends up dead. This is common issue in the UK. Horses routinely killed from people feeding them things they shouldn’t. I would also worry about teenagers at night drunk thinking its a good idea to go ride a horse.

I think electric fencing around your property outside your normal fencing, plus cameras and signs is really the only way to go.

I am not permitted to put electric OUTSIDE our fencing due to county laws. Oddly enough I could use barbed wire (but of course I’m not using that).

We are putting up signs & additional interior fencing and I’m looking into cameras.

BUT being nice doesn’t mean not putting up fences. Being nice means trying to extend good will at the same time as I’m protecting the horses. It is a fine fine line.

This could happen anywhere, so I guess it’s a good discussion to have.

[Impractical_Horsewoman]

I don’t even own a farm, but I agree with you. Perhaps if someone is aggressively nasty to their neighbors (which it’s clear the OP is not) that might invite retaliation. It’s certainly not good to seek out that sort of ire.

But even people who mind their own business can become targets of neighborhood violence and bullying. Some people interpret any boundary enforcement as “nasty.” I’m sure the kids using my driveway to practice their skateboarding skills at 7am one summer morning thought I was mean when I told them (politely) to leave. I’ve had neighbors complain because my hedge doesn’t have a “flat” look to it–it’s a little bit wild, more like an English than a French-style garden with some fronds sticking up, even though my lawn is always mowed.

The person who physically abused an animal like that poor goat is at fault, not the neighbor who didn’t smile enough and wave at the kids. We can and should all try to get along, but some people will always find an excuse to be cruel (or intrusive).