My new to me mare is also hard to load. She got bad or wise enough(depending how you look at it) when she got within 5-6 feet of the trailer. soooo
I borrowed a stock trailer and set it up at the big arena gate so she can’t get around it. Having a bit more openroom to get in has helped.
As other suggested, I have worked at one step at a time, when she had one foot in I would stop and back her out. Rinse repeat, two fronts in back out, rinse repeat…almost a back foot in stop back out…
For a month…now we can calmly walk in, hang out, jump around, eat, back up-come forward-back forward almost all the way out and back in. Just to keep me from feeling confident one of the other horses started worrying about her so she got worried and flew out again…
I have self loaded her which is working well but have not got to actually closing her in yet, maybe this week. I have spent so much of my should be riding time loading her…
Its a bit of humble pie because my last sweet girl was an amazing self loader, but it was her wonderfulness, not my training.
Good luck to you.
And I share this as an owner of an extraordinarily poor loader/traveler who is now reformed due to using this method.
This is a good video, I use the same basic tecnique, learned from JL, stop while its still your idea.
He could perhaps have used an actual hard to load horse. 
I have not read the responses, so this might have been covered already. My mare had never loaded when I got her, so the breeder just drugged her and left it up to me to teach her later. I got to the exact point you are at and I just couldn’t ever tie her in or shut the back or anything. She flew backwards the minute I moved. What ended up working was letting her be loose, and ride backwards! I have a slant load, which is just a big box stall for a single horse with the divider not in place. She’ll happily (self) load, but the minute she goes in, she turns around to face backwards. I did work with a trainer, but in the end, the solution was let her loose and turn around (trainer came twice and got her over the fear aspect and knew when to push and when to not).
Good luck!
So my horse was stupidly hard to load. Rearing, etc. Once we never got on at all and had to stay at the show site! But the point is if you’ve gotten to that level of tension, he’s never going on. ONLY when we made sure every step of the way to the trailer was under threshold did the problem go away. Even the first step out of the barn needed to be under threshold. Once we got that, he kind of walked right on.
I would do it as many days a week as you can. And as soon as she backs off I would put her back on. If she won’t get back on I’d work or lunge her outside the trailer. When she loads I’d ignore her and leave her alone. She will eventually figure out that staying on is where she gets to relax.
I got an excellent price on my mare because she wouldn’t load 
she does now.
Two months is a long time for someone who has a lot of loading skill…but not for a normal person who might not see the clues before they happen. You’ll get there.
Ok… I went through all of this…controlling feet, baby steps, backing off step by step etc. Under the guidance of a very good trainer. Mare now self loads as she was taught to, can even lift the butt bar and touch it to her hindquarters where it would normally sit… but if you shut her in, she’s going to fly back when you open up no matter what. She is pretty calm on the trailer when shut in, but the moment you get to where you’re going - or even if she’s been shut in and you go nowhere… and start to open the ramp, she panics. Hits the butt bar, panics more. Waiting for her to calm down does nothing to help with calm unloading. This is self-unloading… if someone is trying to back her out, she still panics.
TBH, she is retired, and as much as it pains me to say it, I’d probably have her put down, rather than try to transport her in an emergency. The loading is doable… with sedation and help. But the unloading is a sh*tshow.
(And now I’m crying. On the subway. Way to go, QA.)
Yes, I think a lot of horses prefer riding backwards. I know both of my guys prefer this, although they can also back out.
@Montanas_Girl makes a good point that you do not want to be in a trailer with a panicky horse trying to turn around. That’s a good way to crack some ribs. That’s why it’s important that the horse first learns to self load. When I load my horses, I’m outside the trailer off to one side. If the horse comes out either backwards or forwards, I’m not in the way. Once the horse will self load, then teach him to turn around. I did this on the ground first by sending him into a stall and then turning him with the lead rope. When a horse is good at that, it’s easy to teach him to turn around in the trailer while you’re outside.
OP, if you decide to try teaching your horse to turn around to ride backwards, expect that she’ll still come out almost immediately at first. Make outside a little uncomfortable, then reward when she goes back in. Also work on making her take a step back immediately after she turns around, and then reward. This gets her to thinking backwards instead of forward off the trailer. And, if she seems to be thinking about leaving don’t try to stop her. It needs to be completely her idea to stay on the trailer. And most of all, believe that eventually you and she will succeed.
(Oh one more note: I think my mare uses the divider for balance – she is 24 and a bit creaky – so did not pursue the idea of taking the divider out and letting her ride loose very far. But it may be worth a try, if for no other reason than that it will give us self-loading practice. I do remember having her in a friend’s stock trailer two times, and she rode very comfortably loose and was easy to load and unload. Also, the new BO has a HUGE trailer with a side ramp, and that was suggested as something my mare might be able to cope with. Not that I’m shopping for another trailer just to be able to transport a creaky old horse who doesn’t really need to go anywhere anyway.)
I love your stories about your mare. I hope there’s more to your story yet. It’s sincere and heartfelt. Hugs
Thank you… She had aged so much in the past year. She’s currently enjoying the 24/7 outdoor lifestyle (especially the 2 hours in a pasture every day) but I’m not sure how the winter will go. She’s in boots 24/7 right now because the hard ground has made her footsore. Still, no one believes she’s 24.
She isn’t exactly a “heart horse”, more “the horse of a lifetime.”
My “new” horse (March 2021) would easily load on any trailer larger than a 2 horse straight. Guess what trailer I have?? As @endlessclimb said, load and unload until the horse figures out the best place to be. You must have lots of time, unemotional patience, and hay/treats in the trailer. They say your horse can hear your heartbeat from 4’ away, so any anxiety you have about loading will be sensed by your horse.
At first I think my horse was truly afraid & claustrophobic. Then she’d get on and off politely a couple times before saying “no more”. Then when she would reliably self-load during practice, the first time we went to a show, she balked. I knew she could feel my anxiety as this time it was “for real”. I usually haul to shows mid-day, so this summer I loaded her a couple hours before I plan to actually leave, so I stay chill, knowing I’d have time to practice without pressure. That’s helped us a ton!
I won’t run my horse around if she backs off ala Clinton Anderson. But I will have her walk small circles, disengage her hindquarters, and back up before offering her the trailer. I rattle the butt bar…maybe I lock it, maybe I don’t. If she backs off unrequested, she’s sent right back on, no pauses or breaks. She’s smart enough to know that the haynet or Likit treat in the trailer is a MUCH better option. We weren’t able to practice during the 2021 winter months, but there wasn’t much remedial work. She’s been my toughest loader, but it was worth the time and it’s paid off.
