One of my favorite memoirs about young children riding is one I read years ago written by a visitor to Badminton (home of the Beaufort Hunt). The visitor ran into one of the then-Duke’s young children or grandchildren and asked if he was going to go hunting again the next day. The boy replied, “No, we’re not allowed to go hunting more than twice (or maybe thrice?) a week until we’re seven.”
I thought, what a great way to bring up a child! 
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I had my daughter on my horses and her old saintly pony pretty much from when she could sit up onward. I didn’t waste money or time on lessons until she turned five. And I think I was still doing pony rides (and some in-front-of-my-saddle with me rides) at 4. But when she was a late four year old (like maybe just a few months before her 5th birthday), I started putting her on her pony, turning her loose in the ring while I rode (gates closed, of course) and letting her just toodle around the arena doing whatever she wanted to do. She loved it and could get the pony to walk and trot, and eventually canter on her own. But I didn’t think she was in the maturity place to truly “learn” something from someone talking to her until she was closer to 5. Even then, I would say that she didn’t really pick up on what was being taught until 6 or 7. But she had great fun in those lessons as a 5yo, and at the end the day that was all I really cared about.
As for what the lessons looked like - the trainer who taught my daughter was great. She did all sorts of fun games helping her with posting and steering. I can’t remember most of what they did, but there was some time on the lunge line, then always some “around the world” or touch your toes or horse anatomy 101 or something, and she would lead her on a trail ride to “cool out” the pony at the end. My daughter still just adores that trainer!
In response to some of the other comments:
- I agree about pressure on kids. I made a really big point of “ride when you want to, you never have to when you don’t”. But all kids are different. My son had (and still has) zero interest in the horses, and rode maybe 3 or 4 times in his life. My daughter absolutely loves it and at age 14, rides side by side with me every day in addition to doing most of the feeding and caretaking of the horses on a daily basis.
- totally disagree about the leg length needing to be…well…even existent! My daughter could make horses go better than any adult from the minute she figured out “the kick.” And that was maybe age 4? Well before her legs extended below the flap of the saddle. I have many pictures of her with her legs straight out to the side getting ready to kick her slow-as-molasses old pony, and then my former 1.40m horse (who became her short stirrup and tiny jumper teacher).
- at that age I think they gain a lot more from being on a bareback pad than in a saddle. I think my daughter spent a lot more time in her bareback pad on her pony with occasional rides in the saddle. But her position and effectiveness was a million times better in the bareback pad.
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That sounds a lot like what my mother did with me.
Again, step one involves having access to an extremely safe pony to improve the odds of avoiding a disaster. Lol.
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I’m thinking that numerical age matters less than physical ability and strength.
So many kids these days just aren’t strong in the arms. They are unable to physically bring a horse or pony’s head around. Very different from farm kids who have been lifting and pulling and pushing and carrying since they could walk.
So many do sports like soccer, I’d think they would have leg strength, but maybe they just haven’t learned to be assertive enough to get an equine going.
If a kid is physically able to safely ride trails, by all means, love seeing them out there.
A kid who can’t stop a pony or horse from returning home on their own whim needs more support.
I think it is case by case, because children can be very different in what they are physically and mentally ready to do with an equine. 
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I like that about the bareback pad. You’ve just reminded me that Margaret Cabell Self started all her child riders off bareback in lessons before adding saddles. Gosh I envied those kids when I was a child! We did have occasional bareback lessons at the barn where I rode.
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Despite my earlier comment joking about overall horse budget, I do actually enjoy watching my daughter in her riding lessons. She was riding “in the womb”, and has sat on horses and piddled around occasionally her whole life. Recently, as in the last couple months, I signed her up for “formal” lessons with a well established riding program near us. For reference, she is 5, about to turn 6 in December.
While she can ride my mare (at the walk, on the lunge), I find the lessons have really helped her improve on strength and balance. The most important thing though is that they have a barn full of SAINTLY ponies. Wow, are they good. They are not perfect (hard to steer, sometimes dont want to go forward, etc), but they are safe and that is the most important factor, IMO. The other thing I like about formal lessons is that she has someone teaching her that’s not me. Truthfully patience is not my strong suit and having someone else teach her has been an enjoyable experience and fun to watch.
From the several months of weekly lessons, she has learned to post the trot and basic steering (certain ponies she has a harder time steering on, but that’s to be expected). She’s loves riding bareback and was even able to post without the saddle. She LOVES trotting around with no hands and has lately been attempting to post with no stirrups. All of this to say is that I know 1) she’s learning and progressing in lessons and 2) riding has really improved her confidence in herself. Do I expect her to go to the Olympics? No. But for me it’s worth it to spend the money to watch her have fun and grow as an individual.
Oh, and BTW, each pony has it’s own saddle and I’d say about 60% of the saddles her leg doesn’t go past the bottom of the flap.
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I have a coming 3 year old. He “rides” in the leadline sense. No way would I expect him to be able to do it independently now or in the immediate future.
I have had my eye out for a bombproof large mini or small pony for him now that he’s close to 3. But… I have no intention of him learning to ride in a proper sense for quite some time. I just want him to have something small and reasonably trustworthy to fuel his love of animals. Something small enough that he can learn some body control while leadline without having such a far fall to worry about. Something small enough he can participate more in grooming and care under supervision. My full sized horses have been very good with him, but even under dililligent supervision, one false move could do a lot of damage to a toddler.
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We have historically told parents in our program that you can count on one hand the number of 3 year olds who are ready for riding lessons over our many decades; some four year olds are ready (but most are not), most five year olds can do it, and virtually all six year olds can do it. This presumes appropriate ponies, ground people, etc., which we have. Attention span is usually the limiting factor. We do group lessons and try to mix it up so no one activity is too long in the lesson. They needed slightly more experienced kids to watch, and obviously need some initial interest in the horses, etc. (i.e., there is some self selection that is occurring). They should be able to pick up posting, two point, etc. pretty quickly, but independent control will take a while longer.
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Also, and only slightly tongue in cheek–if they walk into the horse barn, and immediately toddle off after the barn cats–that is usually a sure sign to me that they are not ready for riding lessons. Too distractable, and not immediately captivated by/focused on the horses and ponies. May sound funny, but observationally, this is been a very accurate test IME.
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One more way that barn cats earn their keep. Lol.
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UK horse-sale sites are full of ads for “First Ponies” for children, and I love the photos of lead line classes at some of their shows. Some families really dress for the occasion.
There was one lesson barn where I used to live that had one whole aisle of small, medium, and large pony hunters.
I wish this country had more of a pony culture for kids.
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The cats are certainly more at the kids’ eye level.
I wonder if the kids could focus more on the equines if the barns had more 10 - 11h ponies in stalls with pony- and child-height doors?
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We actually do have some ponies this size, as well as bigger ponies and horses. They all have stall guards and stick out their heads when you come into the barn. Nonetheless, some of the kids are like “Kitties!” and off they go…
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I personally would wait for 5-7 for “real” riding without an adult on the ground immediately nearby/pony on lunge/pony on lead line. Before that age, there are too many opportunities for accidents, muscle memory isn’t a thing due to body really changing from toddlerhood to childhood, attention span is nil, and memories aren’t significantly formed. I would go into more detail, but that might necessitate an alter. Lol.
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My daughter started at 3. She had an hour’s lesson but that included grooming and helping tack up and untack. She did a lot of lead line and lunge work. The school had a shetland size riding ring for the little kids and a very short walk through the woods back to the barn. She was on Shetlands and Welsh section A/Bs until she was 6 when we bought her a Saint of a large pony. This is when she really started to ride ride. We still have the pony, kid is now 11 and still loves him to death. The two of them have learned so much from each other.
My daughter just turned 4 in September. She has been riding since the womb, started on ponies as soon as she could sit, was walking leadline on a pony at 18 months. Last year we bought a saintly unicorn 16h quarter horse, she rides him weekly, and just graduated from the lunge to “on her own” at the walk (her walking on her own with me close by). She can stop, start, and sometimes steer 
. This horse is a saint of a guy. I don’t pressure her at all, but yesterday she rode for a solid 40 minutes happy as ever. We focus on fun, horsemanship, and enjoying being at the barn. Some days she rides for 10 minutes and sometimes longer. They’ve done a few leadline classes, and he’s also shown by an adult ammy in crossrails. Picture of said saintly horse and happy 4 year old for the cuteness factor 
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Aww. The horse looks super sweet, and the kid looks like she’s having a fantastic time.
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That baby will have no fear of heights in the years to come! 
That is a wonderful way to start with the right horse and the right mom.
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I just happened to see this on Facebook, which reminded me of this discussion. I hope it’s OK to post it here since I cropped out the phone number.
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Kids act so different with attention span with tiny ponies at their level ime.
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