worst x-mas present ever recieved

[kellyb]

[QUOTE=talkofthetown;3722688]
One year, I had asked for tall boots. Kind of expensive, but my grandparents had asked for a Dover cotalogue…asked all these questions about my sizing…asked lots of horsey questions, secretive phone calls to my mom, you know. Christmas morning, and OMG there’s a BOX under the tree that’s a few feet tall, rectangular, and thin-ish. You know what I’m picturing, right?

It was a 3 foot tall porcelain doll.

Where’s the blank stare emoticon? :lol:[/QUOTE]

More like the where’s the fruitbat emoticon :lol:

[horse-loverz]

[QUOTE=talkofthetown;3722688]
One year, I had asked for tall boots. Kind of expensive, but my grandparents had asked for a Dover cotalogue…asked all these questions about my sizing…asked lots of horsey questions, secretive phone calls to my mom, you know. Christmas morning, and OMG there’s a BOX under the tree that’s a few feet tall, rectangular, and thin-ish. You know what I’m picturing, right?

It was a 3 foot tall porcelain doll.

Where’s the blank stare emoticon? :lol:[/QUOTE]

Now that was just evil…:no: I can imagine the blank stare you gave… :o

[Rallycairn]

Glad to check in with this thread again. Most of these are hilarious, but some are truly sad and poignant.

To keep things light-hearted, my vote for funniest is from the first year of the thread (I think): the truck-stop-figurine-warehouse violin-playing giant Santa that had to be carted home on a plane. When home, Santa frightened the children and drove the dog to aggression (thankfully, said aggression resulted in Santa’s demise).

This thread is truly a holiday treasure.

[MyGiantPony]

One year I got a candle holder. The candle flame is supposed to look like a campfire. There’s a mare and foal at the base, with a western saddle beside the mare. Like someone pulled the saddle off just in time for her to foal. It’s pretty awful.

This from my mother. Who knows I do the “hunt country” decor. But it had horses, so she figured I’d like it. Sigh.

[vxf111]

This thread SO needs to go on the favorites list!!!

Not horsey, but a few years ago I received a very Barcelona cute tee shirt from my grandmother. It was way too small, child/teen sized actually. I was bummed and just put it away and didn’t think much of it.

I took it back out and looked at it. It’s a Barcelona OLYMPICS tee shirt. My grandmother went to the Barcelona olympics… which were in 1992-- back then I would have fit that size. I guess she forgot to send the tee shirt to me in 1992 and figured better late than never! Bummer as I would have loved to wear it back in 1992.

[Sudi_s_Girl]

I Loff this thread!!!

I’ve been laughing so hard – someone at work HAS GOT to be wondering what in the world I’m doing !! hehe

Ok –one horsey, one not so much…

I was around 7 or 8 and visiting my grandmother shortly after Christmas. We were in her bedroom, and on her desk was the most adorable, soft stuffed animal horse. I picked it up and hugged it and told her how cute I thought it was. She takes it from me and says, “Well, I actually bought it for you, but it was so cute I had to keep it for myself!”
??? 8 year olds don’t really understand this.

Aunt – I’m 22 in college, and she mails me this present. Mind you – I had spoken to her on several occasions about picking out a gift for my 17 year old cousin. I ended up spending close to $50 on some questionable video game ::eek!:: AT any rate, I walk into my dorm room and start opening the box in front of my roommate. Out comes this BRIGHT pink cheap knock off swiss army knife thingy that has some kind of make up kit in. Seriously??? My roommate cannot control her laughter. I have no clue where it is now; wouldn’t be surprised at all if I tossed it.

Oh, and last year. My mom comes to me and says my GP’s want to know what to get me. I ask simply for a gift certificate to our local tack shop. What do I get? A gift certificate to our local pet shop that specializes in BIRDS. ??? My poor GM didn’t realize there were different types of “tack shops.” I ended up giving the gift certificate to a friend of mine. sigh

[caffeinated]

So, back when this thread first started, someone mentioned razors and hotel shampoo.

What did I get last year?

Razors (with a whole box of refills!!!) and shampoo. Not quite hotel shampoo, but she (so’s mom) went out and bought giant sized containers of shampoo/conditioner based on what I’d brought with me on a previous visit, which was whatever little sample sized things my mom had put in my stocking the previous year (mom started this because once we grew up and moved away, we would always forget to pack SOMETHING when we came home for christmas, so now she puts toothbrushes, toothpaste, and travel sized-whatever-elses in the stockings).

Oh, and a box of clothes hangers. A GIANT box, mind you. Of clothes hangers I can’t even stand to use because they’re made of some weird material “so your clothes don’t slide off them!” (which means your clothes STICK to them instead).

Seriously, there were like 500 hangers in that thing.

[JoZ]

I exchanged gifts with friends for about 10-12 years and EVERY. SINGLE. YEAR I got some sort of humorous cat crap. Once, I think, there was a dish that was actually attractive, but most was just utter crap. Like “101 Uses for a Dead Cat” or “The Cat Menopause Book” (when I was about 30).

My sisters see these friends more frequently and/or are better liked, so their gifts have been quite decent. I generally put a lot of effort into my gift buying (for the friends, I mean, not my sisters, that goes without saying!) but seriously wonder why.

The last year I did this exchange, I went to their house with my sisters. Did the “oh that’s so cool, thank you” routine. Came home, walked into the house, and deposited the boxes right in the trash. It was very liberating. I thought my sisters would protest or call me shallow or something, but they both sort of nodded and sighed, and we went off to bed.

I guess this is front of mind because I’ll be back home for Christmas this year and will be seeing these friends. Oh joy. Perhaps I’ll pick up something at the airport for them, she said grinchily.

[JanM]

I don’t know if you ever bought from one of those mail-order gift places that are supposed to have great discounts and actually have junk and bad service, and are almost entirely impossible to do a return with but-- A friend bought Mr and Mrs Santa-sitting on a bench, she’s knitting and he’s using a small hatchet or knife and his arms moving back and forth–unfortunately Mrs Claus lost her head in shipment and since Santa was still chopping away it looked like a very festive homicide.

[DressageGeek_Ribbon]

@goponies;3722675

When I was a young teenager, I kept asking for a horse (!) and nothing else. As a joke, my family got me a horse puppet and a real bale of hay to feed said puppet. And nothing else.
I was crushed, but somehow never asked for a horse again. I remember I cried that X-mas…

I can top this. For the EIGHTH year in a row, I had asked for a horse. What I got was a plastic automatic knitting machine. Did I ask for anything that even remotely sounded like, was spelled like, or looked like “plastic knitting machine?” Had I ever displayed any kind of desire to be edumacated in this domestic art?

Did I do all I can to break it within the first hour of receiving it?

No. No. And a resounding YES!!!

[DressageGeek_Ribbon]

JoZ - you can do what I did for my now ex-sister in law. I would look all year for something that was 5 or 10% the original price. And I would leave the original sticker on. One year, from Eddie Bauer Home, I got an earthenware pitcher/platter gift set, original cost $50, at 90% off (months after the season) it was FIVE DOLLARS. Not my taste, but certainly hers’. And the best part is that she would think I had spent so much money that she would end up (because she never spent time on gifts for ours side of the family) getting me a similar priced gift certificate to Dover’s.

That always felt marvelous. In addition, when my neice was young, I always got her gifts that said things on the label like, “BE CAREFUL - WILL STAIN CARPETS AND UPHOLSTERY.”

This was the SIL who, after I had to euthanize my cat of 17 1/2 years, and had chosen (because of time and home constraints) not to get another, got me all cat stuff for the holiday. When I looked at her funny, and said, “You do know I had to put Jeep down in September?” she shrugged and said, “Yeah, well I bought this stuff in July.”

The next year was when she got the pitcher and I got a $75 Dover gift certificate. Boy did that feel good.

[MunchkinsMom]

Well, it took me several hours to read all these posts, and then some time to stop laughing!

I have a few unsightly horse figurines in my china cabinet (along with some nice ones too), that my mother has given me over the years, and since she comes to visit I can’t exactly send them on down the road quite yet. But they are not horrendously bad.

As to the “worst” non-horsey gifts:

Age 10 - when I weighed all of about 50 pounds - my grandmother gave me a girdle - complete with the garter straps for stockings! My mother and I still laugh about that one.

Age 14 - the year my parents divorced - Dad sent to my brother and me - a 5.00 book of McDonalds Gift certificates - and that was all.

Age 15 - Dad strikes again. This time he sends some Army patches (the calvalry and something else - he was an officer in the army at the time) and a ski mask/hat - you know, the one that pulls over your head with the eye, nose and mouth holes? I said “what the heck, does he want us to start robbing banks?”

After that he got remarried, and the gifts got a bit better, but not much, since he let my ex-stepmother be in charge of gift buying. His third wife was much, much better at gift giving, no complaints with her gifts.

Age 16 - grandmother strikes again. Red velvet slippers that looked like elf boots (came up way over your ankles) with pointy toes and black plastic soles and heels! It was all my mother and I could do to keep a straight face when I opened that box.

My ex-husband - our first Christmas together he bought me a set of TV trays (the kind you eat dinner in front of the TV on), because I had mentioned that it might be easier to use those instead of the coffee table. After that he got a list from me every year, until the divorce.

Last year - my MIL works in a western wear store, and most of the time she does okay - well, this one was a gray western style shirt, complete with the pearl snaps, and bright red roses embroidered on it both front and back! Worst part? She lives with us, and I have not had the nerve yet to put it on and wear it in public! And I can’t put it in the clothing donation bin yet (but I’m sure some square dancing folks might just drool over it!).

This year I filled out an Amazon wish list, and emailed it to my daughter, with instructions that she get a copy to my husband. He is smart enought to know to get me only what I ask for. Although what I really want is a contractor grade 100ft hose for the barn, and I am too cheap to buy it for myself, won’t it be funny if that does show up under the tree?

[Blkarab]

[QUOTE=King’s Ransom;2054345]
Well, I have one that is not funny and not horsey. But since Christmas is coming up again, and we’re all talking about it, I would be interested in what you guys would do with this.

A few years back, at the end of a very serious relationship that went suddenly and unexpectedly sour, my soon-to-be ex-BF gave me a VERY expensive watch. Here is how he did it. He called me and gave me his cc # and exp. date and told me to go online and buy it. He really wanted me to have it, but was too busy to do it himself. ??? At any rate, the danged watch is a Cartier and it cost a bundle.

Fast forward to today. I love the watch. In theory, at least. It’s a wonderful watch. But I hate the whole situation surrounding it. I always think of it as my “booby prize” (no pun intended) or “parting gift.” I think the guy felt very guilty for the very slimey thing he was doing, and this expensive watch made him feel better. In many ways, it made me feel worse. Definitely my worst Christmas gift ever.

AND, to keep it horse-related, I have nowhere to wear this watch anymore. King entered my life as the ex- exited. Now I live on a small farm with two horses and absolutely nowhere to wear this expensive watch.

So … do I keep it and wear it occasionally and forget about the whole awful-ness of the thing … send it back to the guy with a hateful note … or sell it on ebay?

Hate the guy. Love the watch. What to do?[/QUOTE]

Wear it to the barn :winkgrin:. Think of it as “fit for a King” and be glad the jerk is gone.

[Blkarab]

[QUOTE=DressageGeek “Ribbon Ho”;3722876]
I can top this. For the EIGHTH year in a row, I had asked for a horse. What I got was a plastic automatic knitting machine. Did I ask for anything that even remotely sounded like, was spelled like, or looked like “plastic knitting machine?” Had I ever displayed any kind of desire to be edumacated in this domestic art?

Did I do all I can to break it within the first hour of receiving it?

No. No. And a resounding YES!!![/QUOTE]

If my husband gave methat particular gift, I think I would strangle him. He’s always joking about me taking up knitting instead of riding because it would be “cheaper”. Fortunately, he’s just joking, because he hates it when I don’t ride for awhile…:eek:

[twofatponies]

Despite the fact that i was utterly horse crazy as a child, my parents saw Christmas as a good time to stock up on practical things. Typical gifts: tube socks, ski masks (army dad didn’t understand the appeal of a pretty scarf), deodorant, acne cream, etc. As an adult my dad continued to reliably send me a plain black wallet sized pocket calendar every year. My mom went on later in life to get artsy craftsy, and now sends me scrapbooks filled with all the pictures I’ve sent to her in the last year, with cute captions and decoration.

[x-rab]

That is What He thinks

Take up knitting and see if he doesn’t beg you to go back to horses. Good yarn is not cheap and lets not forget the right size needles, the patterns books, spacers, counters, etc. I have friends who have thousands of dollars in yarn waiting to be made up into assorted knitted items. You can blow several hundred dollars on yarn per sweater and if you learn to knit fast, it adds up fast.

Can you tell I tried knitting? I am not good at it so didn’t go that far into the hole yarn wise. My teacher used an empty pretzel jar to put left over yarn in and when it was full, she had enough yarn to knit a sweater.

Forgot about one of a kind buttons too.

[Coreene]

My aunt, the bitch (the others are very jolly), gave me a ceramic piggy bank of the letter A. Uh huh, because “Coreene” obviously has an A at the begging. Stupid bitch. Left the 25 cent price tag from Pic-N-Save at the bottom of it.

And then there was the wild Arabians in the snow cheesebag calendar. Oy vey.

[Woodsperson]

I have the ugly ugly ugly horse head book ends, of course. The horsey sweaters go directly to the give-away bag. I’m not sure what my worst gift was. One year my sister gave me an “I love my cat” decorative tile. I have 3 dogs and 4 horses. I have never owned a cat. The same year she gave my husband a ‘tree face’. That same year my husband gave me a set of 3 wise men with Baby Jesus painted across their stomachs and silver jewelry (I don’t wear silver) with what can only be described a petrified dog turds on the necklace and earrings. Picture if you will shaking your head while the dangly dog turds swing on your earrings. I was not gracious about these gifts-subtlety does not get through to husband. The next year I was sure he would do better. I got Father Christmas with Baby Jesus painted on his stomach and another dog turd necklace. It wasn’t some kind of passive agressive power play. He honestly didn’t get it.

This year I am getting a new saddle. I picked out myself and called him to tell him what a generous loving husband he is.

[Sonesta]

Completely on point, here is a GREAT video about men buying the wrong Christmas present:

http://bewareofthedoghouse.com/VideoPage.aspx

[AdAblurr02]

I guess I have been lucky…

When I WANTED a wheelbarrow I got one. Usually Mr AdAblurr pretty much lets me pick what I would like… and he’s easy to buy for himself.
THIS year, he gave me (drum roll please!) an as yet unfinished 100x240 outdoor arena… maybe next spring we can finish it out! it’s like the plumber’s wife with leaky pipes, been here eight years and no place to ride except pasture and round pen… but there’s hope!

For those who have told such awful tales of mis-giftings, here’s a funny for you all (from a denizen of the Dodge Diesel Trucks forum)
http://s223.photobucket.com/albums/dd151/madhatDTR/?action=view&current=wronggift.flv