PLEASE enter this in that contest for opening lines of novels. It’s a sure winner!!!
My coworkers one year decided to get me a resin picture frame that had a horse standing on the side of it. The horse was solid chestnut. One of my horses is a paint, so they took liquid paper and painted white patches on him! The final product was…unusual.
[QUOTE=Ratherberidin;4559434]
My coworkers one year decided to get me a resin picture frame that had a horse standing on the side of it. The horse was solid chestnut. One of my horses is a paint, so they took liquid paper and painted white patches on him! The final product was…unusual.[/QUOTE]
Please post a picture! :lol:
The ebay commericals always crack me up: “I know it’s the thought that counts, but think harder!”
My favorite on here so far may be the opened bottle of lotion.
Thanks, GreenTea, can’t post a pic because the picture frame and I parted ways when the liquid paper was flaking off on everything!
My favorite gift on this thread is Ted’s skull saddle pad! I have wondered if some of the accessories I purchased for my horses embarrased them.
[QUOTE=MeredithTX;2055595]
I did get a cherry pitter as a wedding gift recently, and that was the oddest thing I’ve ever received. I tried to take it back to a million stores, but I can’t figure out where it’s from! Who seriously needs a cherry pitter?[/QUOTE]
is it a single or double pitter??? I would LOVE to have a double cherry pitter again! I lent my double to a friend and it came back a single:( and have never beed anble to find a double again.
[QUOTE=Snapdragon;3732335]
Some of these are so funny, and some sad. I count this as a funny one.
My Granny was a very frugal woman. Never went for anything expensive or fancy in any aspect of her life, but she was a wonderful Granny. I had visited her in the fall and noticed all the towels in her house were threadbare–probably 20- to 30-years-old. For once, I thought, A Ha!, this is something I can buy her that she’ll like and actually have a use for–so I bought her a set of lovely towels–thick, great pattern, perfect. Christmas day, she opened up the gift, oohed and awwed. I thought: Winner!
Next year, Christmas rolls around. We’re home opening gifts, and Granny presents me with three boxes. What can it be? I opened them up. Yup: same towels I gave her the year before. Never been used. I oohed and awwed. She seemed so pleased by her choice of gift!!!:lol:
She was in her mid-eighties at the time, and even though she was pretty darn sharp 'til the end, I’m sure she completely forgot how the towels ended up at her house. And, she probably figured she was doing just fine with the ones she had. I still use those towels and laugh every time I think of how I acquired them.[/QUOTE]
That was the family joke. Buy Grandma something you really like because you will wind up getting it back…
My ex-husband showed his deeply considered gifting skills for the 6 years we were married
-
Telephone. No not a cell phone. A vintage yellow (the color of an over ripe banana) princess telephone. Not even new. I mentioned that I’d like an extension in the guest room the June prior.
He was so pleased with himself!
This, our first Christmas together! He said he found it at a “cool vintage shop” (Well, honey, if that’s what you want to call “Goodwill”, so be it) -
A t-shirt that said “Horsey Mama” in rhinestones. He had it made, because that year my mare had gone out to be bred, but didn’t take. She colicked and passed away that fall.
This was to have been my dream baby, she was from really good lines and I really wanted a good local stallion who I’d seen his babies year after year. He ended up using that shirt as a golf rag. -
A cocktail ring. Oval with a lot of nice diamonds. This was a nice surprise, until he told me it had been his dead aunt’s. Thanks hon.
His aunt had died that year I think his sister insisted that he take it, she knew how inept he was.
So considerate.
I can’t complain, I had a jeweler make earrings out of them and a necklace, I don’t wear rings. Still, I give pause now, because I know he never even thought about jewelry, despite the million ads for jewelry that time of year. -
The Unfortunate Decision To Take Me To The Ice Capades. It was all a surprise, nice dinner, etc. Then he shows me the tickets. I nearly cried.
I’d seen the Olympics the previous winter (was afterglow that obvious?) and I’d mentioned in February that it would be fun to go see the Olympics - in four years. Ten months later I’m watching people in costumes dance to loud music and kids screaming in my ears.
We didn’t talk for a few weeks. -
A Jim Croce CD. Greatest Hits.
a) I listened to him as a kid on the radio
b) we were talking about dead rock stars once, Jim Croce never came up.
This is when I realized that this man only listened to me in small intervals, then extrapolated the word into crazy notions. That year I’d gotten him special order golf clubs. I’d hunted the pro down and his friends and found out what he’d been yearning for in clubs. -
A pair of shoes. Not boots for riding, not designer shoes: a pair of Doctor Scholl’s wooden sandals. Huh?
I nearly cold cocked him with those shoes.
He said “you mentioned you needed to lose some weight”.
I did: all 198 pounds of him.
I got the cookie jar that neighs!
We are having a white elephant gift exchange, the kids don’t understand why I want to send it on its way. Your going aren’t you? HAHAHA (evil laugh!)
Aimee, :lol:
I’m bookmarking this thread so I can read it in full at a more suitable hour [it’s got midnight here!]
One year I got a pair of tights (nylons?) from my mother. She hadn’t even bought them for me, she’d bought them for herself, but bought the wrong size…
Yeah we put the FUN in dysfunctional…
a [now ex] sister-in-law gave me a purse (the thing you put your money in).
It was a used purse
A really old, manky filthy, used purse.
I’ve never gotten a nasty horsey present … had a friend who used to give me nice horsey stationery.
Don’t normally post but…
Ok this is possibly one of my favorite threads. Worst Christmas present was probably a copy of a tombstone my brother-in law gave us one Christmas. I have put it away, deep in a box, never to be resurrected in my lifetime. It had a skull and crossbones on it.
eeeewwww ~ a mixer !!! exactly what I would HATE !
:eek:A Williams -Sonoma - French Blue mixer ~ don’t cook and :mad:don’t have any interest in learning to cook! Plus that $$ would have purchased a nice bridle plus !!! I was mad as it was a duplicate gift my mother just gave all of us ! - but the rest of the “all of us” were very talented cooks and not riders ! I returned it to the store and since I could not find ANYTHING :lol: I wanted in that store - I had them send the $ back to my mother. She knew better !!! and said so later !:yes:
Ok… after the toilet… the blockbuster gift card (from hubby) the John Deer clock that chimes sounding like a different tractor every hour… (what home would be complete without one of those:lol:) I took matters in my own hands this year. I bought myself a new ring and told hubby he did good this year… :winkgrin::lol::lol: and thereby relieve him of his crappy gift giving duties…
I told him it was enough… But then one day I come home and he says he got ME something else… it was a BIG surprise… Hmmm intrigued since I hadn’t asked for anything else and that he actually attempted to buy something else for me I asked what it was. He told me he had to finish something then he would show me… OK… So I was banished to my room while he finished doing whatever the heck he was doing…
Well I hear a loud THUD come from the basement… like LOUD LOUD… couch falling or something… then I hear him yell…“It’s ok… don’t worry about the noise” … “I’m allright!!” :o Hmmm… What the heck is going on down there???
Well he leads me down to the basement to show me “my” (note the parenthesis…) present… A new Blue Ray player… Which is nice…buuuut… I never asked/wanted a Blue Ray player… but he did… as well as the new Watchman movie on Blue Ray which he also so generously bought for me… :rolleyes::sigh:…The THUD… it was the sound of some guy falling out of a window because he had the surround sound set on the “ears bleeding” setting…
Can’t wait to see what I get from my in-laws this year… it is usually interesting too…
Oh, not Christmas, but a dumb gift fortunately avoided (with difficulty).
This last August 1st, on my birthday, my Dad drove down to see me and said I could “do anything at all you like with the day - as long as we eat at Cracker Barrel.” Dad is addicted to Cracker Barrel. I actually prefer Subway, but CB is okay now and then if not my dime.
So we were in CB waiting for our table, weekend lunch rush. We were browsing, of course, since the place can’t decide if it’s a garage sale or a restaurant. They had a new display of horsey stuff up, and my horse radar cued me in, so I immediately gravitated to that side of the room and was looking stuff over.
GORGEOUS horse plaque on top. It was one of those sort of laminated paintings on a large polished rock. Galloping herd of horses - realistic horses, great likeness and reproduction of picture - and a Bible verse. I loved the thing. Dad saw me looking and came over.
“Hey, horse stuff! Look at this horse stuff!”
“Um, yeah, I’d found it, Dad.”
“Hey, look at this!” (holds up bizarre stuffed horse who looks like he had contracted tendons and who also had goofy eyes with eyebrows)
“Mmm hmm” (looking at the plaque still)
“Oh, WOW. Look at THIS! Have you seen THIS?” (holds up a cartoon-style poster with a draft horse advising people he doesn’t have to close the door because he actually was born in a barn)
“Mmm hmm” (still looking at plaque)
“You know what, I hadn’t gotten you a gift yet, so I’ll get you anything from this horsey stuff that you want for your birthday.”
:D:cool: “That plaque on top.” :yes::yes:
“But it’s . . . weird looking.”
(Seriously? He thinks THAT’S weird looking, but not the cartoon poster or the stuffed beanie post accident?) “You said anything.”
“Well, let’s see.” Looks at price tag. :eek: “Okay, sorry, too much. I’ll get you anything under $15 from this horsey stuff.”
So I wrenched my eyes off the plaque rock and started browsing further.
Dad, prompting. “You know, this poster with the draft horse is only $14.95. That’s just perfect! I can see it on your door.”
:eek::no: “Um, let me look a little further, Dad.” (Help! Anything under $15 that isn’t that poster and that I wouldn’t have to immediately throw away. Finally finding a horse clock that is passable, looks like a real horse likeness, doesn’t look like a stage prop on Hee Haw. I like clocks, too, as a bonus. It’s not the painted rock, but it’s okay.) “This clock is $14.50.”
“You’d rather have THAT than this poster?” 
“Yes, honestly, I would.”
“But the poster is CUTE!”
(Why does my own father think I want things that are “cute?” I didn’t want things that are “cute” even when I was 6. I’m also a neat freak, contrary to the message of the poster. And I HATE stylized cartoon horses.) “I’d really rather have the clock, Dad.”
“You’re sure? Once we check out, you can’t change your mind.”
“Yes, I’m sure. It’s a nice clock. I’d like it for my birthday, please.”
“Well, okay.” With a final shrug at my crazy notions of gifts, he takes the clock to the cashier, while I give one last longing look at the plaque rock and one last relieved look at the draft horse barn poster.
VERY close call. :eek:
Cheesy fake leather western bridle from a horse friend who knew better,(dressage) who had the funds…then cared to show me her beautifull real leather double stitched bridle she got for Christmas, a double whammy…
I have always been really lucky to get super horsey gifts, but then I’m not exactly subtle about what I want lol
However, one year, my stepmother (who clearly couldn’t stand me) gave me a bunch of half used perfume sample vials. I think I was 10 at the time. Then she told me my father found all of my gifts in a dumpster. What a witch.
Thankfully my REAL family is good to me 
Mea Culpa
I am feeling confessional so I will post about a Christmas gift that I gave that was pretty dismal.
Shortly after I got my first horse that I actually owned (as an adult) I thought my vet would love nothing better for Christmas than a coffee mug with a picture of my horse on it. I loved this horse so naturally my vet would like nothing better than looking at him as he had his morning coffee right? Yes, I was delusional.
The horse was wearing a blanket with a banner safety pinned to it that read “Merry Cristmas”. Yes, I had misspelled Christmas. Didn’t notice when I made the poster. Didn’t notice when I took the picture or when I took it to the photo shop to order the mug. Not when I picked it up. Not when I wrapped it. I did not notice until months later when I was actually at my vet’s house and was served coffee. In my horse’s cup. That said “Merry Cristmas”. :o
Bless his heart for not immediately throwing it away …
Not a “bad gift” per se, but… my father got me a book about horse breeds for Every. Single. Gift. Occasion. for the first, ohhhh, 17 years of my life or so.
As you can imagine, it was very exciting when I was little, but became progressively less exciting as time passed. Ultimately I had to explain to him that although I love horses, there is a limited use for 40 million different books about horse breeds.
The books were all very well intentioned gifts, though! :lol:
A barbie mansion when I was little. I was always the girl stealing my brother’s G.I. Joe’s…
Ok I have one.
Years ago I had a boyfriend whose family were truly lovely people. Normally they gave me thoughtful, generous gifts, including useful horsey items like a dressage whip, halter, gloves, etc. (his sister made me a pillow with a horse silhouette backed in a silver holly print, when I got my horse “Holly” – it was more tasteful than it sounds and I still have it!)
However, one year I open this large, very weighty box to find this “thing” it was a plaster horse, that looked like it was made by a demented 4 year old using a butter knife as their only carving tool, it even had copious glitter as decoration and creepy glass eyes. The ugliness of the thing literally stunned me into silence.
Apparently, it was an antique “Chalkware” carnival prize and not without value to the right person. But OMG it was sooooo hideous. For comparisons sake, the decoration was at the about the same um “artistic” level as this Chalkware figurine, but the carving was much worse!
I felt awful hating it since they were very sweet people and 99% of the gifts I got from them were right on as far as my interests and taste.
