Young adulting, eventing

[AskMyAccountant.17]

I’m about to be 29 and found the same struggle. I gave up my lifelong dream to ride-full time about 3 months into it post-grad (My interview is on Major League Eventing Podcast w/ ClaireCumbee where I talk about it) I find it breaks into two struggles. There’s the financial aspect. I mean I have a a great job, do part-time accounting, do social media 2-3 hours a day, and ride 2/3 client horses. Oh, and I’ve sold my used socks on the internet. If there’s a way to legally make money, I’ve done it to pay my bills. (One day, I will write a book) I look for ways to make passive income.

Then, there’s the mental and social strain. You’re juggling job, social life, trying to attend friend’s get-together, WHILE trying to convince a man you aren’t “that” into horses until you can trick them into falling in love with you.

I don’t think I would change one thing about my 20’s now; at least I’m so much more content with where and who I am now at 28, almost 29. But, I would tell myself to “own” who I was and what I wanted. That can occur in the barn or outside. I was so insecure of being “horse girl” among my friends and boys. Then, at the barn I was insecure of being the “poor” one. I had to finally realize that others opinions didn’t determine my self-worth, and I strove for what made me happy. That meant allowing some surface level friendships and toxic relationships to end. This probably affects even non-“horse-girls,” but is elevated with this hobby we have.

I also advise dry-shampoo. I can change at the barn, wash my arms in the sink, a little deodorant, flip the hair over my head with a little swoosh of the Batiste Dry Shampoo, and be ready for margs with the girls in about 15-minutes.

Cheers!

[subk]

So I haven’t read all this, but I’ll bet no one else has given you this advice:

Find someone you love more than your horses and riding and who loves you. Put them first. Be willing to make sacrifices and to delay gratification. Now you have a partner who is committed and dedicated to you and the things that bring you joy instead of just trying to figure it all out by yourself. And if the horse part doesn’t work out you have still set yourself up with a great chance at having a fulfilling life anyway.

I’m 57 and that’s what worked for me for the last 30 years. I’ve ended up with a happy life full of love and horses. (Which sounds like a lot less work than it was.)

[LuvMyTB]

In my early 20s I did nothing in the way of horses, after teaching/catch riding (at home, no showing) all of my teenage years. Late 20s I had a couple of cheap horses, cheap board. No lessons.

In my 30s I was able to do more than I ever had in my life, due to working a second job, an understanding husband, and an amazing horse friend who opened a lot of doors for me. I was able to lesson regularly, compete regularly during the season, etc. It took ALL of my time and pretty much all of my money, but it was so much fun, I rode so much better and I have no regrets.

Late 30s–I was between horses for a while, haven’t competed in several years. I have a cheap young horse who I’ve just recently invested a lot of pro training in and I’m looking forward to seeing how that pays off over the winter. I hope to compete next year; however, I am having a lot of internal conversations about whether that will be in eventing. The shows in my area are few and far between, regular XC schooling takes a decent amount of time and energy that I don’t always have, etc. I am seriously considering just doing straight dressage & jumpers next year as there are many local circuits near me.

I didn’t start eventing until about 10 years ago and I love it. Horses and riding are a main priority in my life. However, as I get older, I get more choosy about where I spend my time and money and I don’t know if trying to be good at 3 disciplines is in the cards right now. It’s a lot of pressure to balance with non-horse life. Just my .02.

[lenapesadie]

@RAyers

Only date people who ride

And argue over what hay to buy? NEVER AGAIN!

[gallop_jump]

Or a FARRIER. Also team Never Again

[FitToBeTied]

In your 20’s, IMHO, it should be about getting your career established and setting up financial security. Here is some financial math to consider. If you start investing $1,000 a year at age 22 and do that until you are 62, you will have around $300,000. If you wait until you are 32 to start investing that $1000 then at age 62 you will have around $125,000.

That assumes you only invest $1,000 which really isn’t much, probably two months boarding fees. If you can afford boarding fees then you can afford to save and invest.

Also, you are building your career and earning power, which means more ability to invest.

My wife and I didn’t buy the first horse until our early thirties. Since then we’ve had between 2-4 horses per year. We retired early at 55.

Early savings and investing have a huge impact on your later years.

Those early years

[sportyspicepony]

@AskMyAccountant.17

I also advise dry-shampoo. I can change at the barn, wash my arms in the sink, a little deodorant, flip the hair over my head with a little swoosh of the Batiste Dry Shampoo, and be ready for margs with the girls in about 15-minutes.

THE BATISTE DRY SHAMPOO IS A GAME CHANGER! my only regret for them is that the bottle runs out too fast LOL

[Live_Wire]

I just said goodbye to my twenties. I’ll spare you all the details of my life story, but I will say this, I have never once regretted my struggle through horse ownership in my twenties. It has been hard, I have felt defeated, I don’t have as much money as I probably should, and I’m not as accomplished as I had hoped to be, but I love my boy and I’m thankful I’ve had that constant in my life to keep me pushing forward.

Where there is a strong enough will, there is a way. If you aren’t that dedicated to it, that’s okay, too! You don’t have to be! Decide what’s important to you, and try it out. If it changes, that’s alright. If you’re worried you won’t be able to balance all the things that are important to you, I can assure you that you can and you will.

[RAyers]

I’d rather argue of what hay to buy than where to vacation. And I sure as heck prefer arguing about what the competition schedule will be over them wanting to travel to a spa or beach.

[luvmyhackney]

My first piece of advice is to pick up Tony Robbins book on investing and max out your 401k as soon as you can. Literally when you turn 18, start investing. Pay yourself first.

Second piece… get settled early in your career and make goals of how to move up or change roles for flex time.

It’s ok to take lessons or volunteer to get your horse fix.

The advice above on filling your plate is excellent and something I struggle with.