ACH, I feel your pain!
My boyfriend watched my lesson the other night and later told me “wow, that horse looked all jumbled after the first jump” at which point he got a death look and then he says “no, no, not YOU, the HORSE looked jumbled. That’s his fault, not yours”
I didnt bother to explain to him that this was a really fancy horse that I had borrowed, and that it WAS in insult! LOL That was the last comment out of him!
Fairweather, at least my brother understands:
When he tells people his sister has a horse and they say, “she must be rich,” he responds, “No, my sister has a horse, and therefore she is POOR!” G
My latest story:
This was at school and I was talking to someone other than the person who responded!
“We’re going to have to stop leasing my sister’s pony soon because she’s outgrown him.”
“Oh, when is the pony going to grow?”
“whaaat???”
“I thought ponies were baby horses”
Then of course I had to go on and explain that ponies are just small horses!
Also, when people ask about how I did at a show, I always say “we”, as in “we did really well”, and they’re like “what? You compete on a team??”, and I have to explain that I say we, and as in the horse and I! We both do work!
LOL i have also gotten the “orgasm question”…men REALLY want to know, lol…
when i was at school ( i majored in equine science w/ an emphasis on breeding farm mgt), i took one of my friends out to the horse center w/ me to see the babies, and i was telling her about collection and AI and natural cover, and she looked me straight in the eye and asked “But how do you get them to lie down??”
when i quit laughing i explained the mechanics of horse breeding to her…i dont think she ever came out there again!!
The jockey comments reminded me… I used to date a jockey, who was about 4" shorter than me, and people would come up to him and ask “Hey, are you a jockey?” and he’d say “Well, it was either that or a basketball player wasn’t it?”.
laugh
JenniferS
Ah, yes, sheath cleaning. A classic tale:
Many, many years ago, I boarded in Golden Gate Park. There was no hot water at the barn, so for such delicate operations, we always brought out a thermos of boiling water and diluted it with cold to have warm water for the process. Since the stable in GGP was a public barn with lots of tourist/non-horsey neighborhood people wandering through, a friend kept her horse in his stall to clean him. She was working away, and happened to look up to find a boy of about 11 or 12 peeking around the stall door to see her washing her gelding’s… ahem… intimate area. She said the look on his face was incredible. He immediately bolted and we can just IMAGINE what he told his friends he had seen!!!
What a great thread… been laughing hysterically for the last 10 minutes…
<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by langshaw:
[B]The conversation goes something like this…
You: “I ride hunter/jumpers for my sport”
Other Person:confused look
You: “You know I jump things on horses”
Other Person: “Oh, I rode a horse once at _______ (usually uncle’s grandma’s etc house) and this horse he like ran away as fast as he could run (you know trotting)and I fell off and got ______(usually thrown into fence stepped on kicked etc). I’ve never gotten on a horse again.”
You: if I hear one more I rode a horse once story again, I might shoot myself
LOL [/B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
That’s soooo funny!!!
I ALWAYS have it described to me from the non-horsey person as they got THROWN from the horse. They’re THROWN from the horse, they never fall off, like it’s always the horses fault! LOL!
[This message has been edited by Canter (edited 10-18-2000).]
My turn!!
Exhibit A:
I was having some work done on my kitchen, when the handyman noticed some ribbons and pictures of my horse. “You gotta horse? My daddy used to break QHs…maybe I can come out and ride your horse one day.” (As if!!)
Exhibit B:
Message on my phone from my sister: “We were watching the Olympics today and saw some of the dressage competition…at, I think that’s what it was. I am SO IMPRESSED that YOU can do all that.” (Oh sure, it’s not that hard, I’d have been in Sydney too, but I missed the deadline for entries.)
<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Sandy M:
[B]3) “Oh yes, I rode once - the horse (deliberately) tried to scrape me off on/under a tree.” I’ve NEVER heard of a horse actually doing this, and yet it has happened to so many people! G
Actually Sandy, I have had two uncles that have been deliberatly scraped off under trees! LOL! My Uncle George had a horse that would run, and I mean full force, for the first low-hanging branch she could find and duck, scraping hin right off!
The other, my other uncle tried to ride a horse that [I]HATED[/I] him, and the horse did the same as described above. It was rather amusing!
My personal not-so-favorites include:
Oh, can I come ride? 
Riding is so easy, all you do is sit there, it’s not excercize
What do you do for a living that lets you afford a horse?
Q: What breed is your horse?
A: Thoroughbred.
Q: Yeah, but what breed?
AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Oh yeah, and Sandy, your dear “polka-dotted” Erik does not look rented! LOL!
[This message has been edited by devildog20 (edited 10-18-2000).]
[This message has been edited by devildog20 (edited 10-18-2000).]
Male co-worker (looking at picture of my stallion): “Is that your horse?”
Me: “Yes.”
Him: “What kind of horse is that?”
Me: “Well, he’s a warmblood stallion jumper.”
Him (looking at me like I’m an alien): “What the heck is a warmblood?”
Me, opting for half-answer: “Thoroughbreds are hot-blooded, warmbloods are European and have more cold blood.”
Him, looking really wierded out: “What do you mean he’s a jumper?”
Me: “We jump fences.”
Him: “Why?”
Me: “For sport.” Getting too tired to explain it all.
Him: “What’s a stallion?”
Me, looking forward to getting rid of said co-worker: “An uncastrated gelding. You should see the size of his thing!!”
Him, probably wondering what the heck a gelding is but too embarrassed to ask, smiles wanly and leaves my office.
At my daughter’s school you can be excused from PE if you have some other out-of-school sports commitment. Last year she was denied that exemption “because riding is not really a sport.” We tried again this year; I explained all that she does in much greater detail; and it was granted. That’s progress.
I’m just impressed that your friends WANT to ride your horses or learn to ride. If I mention that I ride/jump horses, I usually just get this blank stare and the conversation shifts to something they have more knowledge about or interest in.
Oh, and I CONSTANTLY get from an office pal of mine … did you win your race this weekend? I ride hunters … it’s not how FAST you go! Oh, well, at least he asks!
[QUOTE]Originally posted by magnolia:
[B]I hate this
“Boy, he sure is big”
“Yes, Nicolas is a draft horse”
“Do you really ride him?”
“Yes”(what do you think he is tacked up for?)
“His feet are big”
“Yes”
“Does he ever step on you”
“Why yes, and he especially likes the feet of annoying people”
soooooooo funny!
One of the questions that I hate most: “How can you still do that after what happened to Christopher Reeve?”
Based on that line of thinking, people should not drive, walk, run, go outside, play sports, even being born would be to dangerous.
[This message has been edited by langshaw (edited 10-19-2000).]
This is a recent convo from my high school health class:
T=them
C=Coach who taught the class
M=Me
C: So what did you do this weekend?
M: I rode my horse at a show.
C: Oh. So you didn’t really do anything.
M: No, it was hard work, I was really tired and sore yesterday.
T: Yeah, you’re a nerd. You ride horses!
M: I’d like to see you jump a course of eight fences, getting a uncooperative thoroughbred to leap over scary fences.
T: Oh yeah, like that’s work. All you do is hang on.
M: ignore them. It’s pointless.
T: Yeah, I rode a horse before. It was easy. I even ran on it. (most likely a dead beat canter.)
As you can guess, I am known as ‘Horsegirl’, just plain ‘horse’, and ‘the one who loves horses’. And I’m considered a nerd because of what I do and what I like to do. It makes me so mad, because the football players like to play football and they are worshipped, but if someone likes to ride and show they throw a fit and label them nerds. Once I made the mistake of showing some pictures of me jumping a course to some people in my high school. I got teased endlessly for two months. 
TB_33
I think 3eme said it best the other day.
From non-horsey friends, “So, did you win your race today?” In reference to horse shows.
Too funny.
Number one reason why I don’t tell…
“Will you teach me to ride?” When you know they have no business around horses.
Or: “Will you take me riding?” Right. On my client’s five figure horse. I’m sure they won’t mind. So, let’s put you on my OTTB instead. Sure. Just kick 'im.
ME: “Yeah, I can’t do that afterschool I have to go train?”
SOMEONE: “Train?”
“Yeah, I ride horses?”
“Oh, do you own one?”
“Yeah”
"What breed/’
“Thoroughbred”
“What’s that?”
“You know, like they race”
“Oh, you ride racehorses?”
“No, he’s been retired for years”
“So you don’t ride him”
“No, I ride hunters”
“You hunt?”
“No - like I jump stuff”
“Oh, like on TV”
“Well, lower”
“Oh. Well, you show right?”
“Well sometimes”
“Like Devon or Madison Square Garden”
"Well…not really 
" LOL
The other one I HATE is the people who think you are only a serious rider if you own a horse - like leasing or taking lessons or whatever doesn’t count.
Sarah
Sandy, I am sure poor Erik took as much offense to those who asked as you did! I threaten Chloe that I am going to give her to the stable next door where all the horses are half-starved and being ridden anyway! She usually straightens right up…
One of my favorites:
them “What kind of horse is he?”
me “An Appendix”
Them very confused thinking of an organ
me “A QH TB cross”
them “oh so like a mutt”
me “well, I guess you could say that, but he was bred to be that way, so he could have the mind of a QH, and the classy TB lines”
them “lines?”
me “never mind”
I’m not even going into describing conformation, its kinda like trying to describe a good mover!
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