Yes, thats right, the hunt is only a few miles from my house and i finally had a weekend with nothing to do so i decided to practise at defying death, or also aka foxunting.
So Sunday morning I saddled up the old cowpony/ex-dressage horse (or the horse known as- “him? Naw he wont kill ya, horse could walk through hell and not care”. So Horse and I make it to the hunt. I of course being my dressage background, am impeccably dressed… in bright colors. Whoa!! Nobody told me they were going to wear brown and grey!!! (It was cubbing) Besides, plaid is in and tweed is out but anyway…
Once the hunt horses stopped spooking at my clothes we got underway.
I had to endure a few sneakers about by dressage saddle and my “perfect posture”. The perfect posture lasted for all of five minutes. THen, for no apperent reason everybody and their horse started galloping like mad!!! And, i guess i missed something because i thought foxhunting was mostly about foxes but these deer show up out of nowhere and they are followed by some hounds and horses and people making wierd noises and cracking whips, and whistles and bells and then the sky started to fall, and at that point my dear pony fell over dead.
And then he realized he was in dressage-horse-hell and he did what every self-respecting dressage horse would do (he checked to make sure the judge was watching, arched his neck, took a pose…
and did the panic I-going-to-die-therefore-i-will-die-in-the-most-dramatic-death-ever gallop.
And that was the end of my perfect posture and i doubt it will return until i go visit my chiropracter.
In fact, that gallop was the end of everything. Riding no longer exsisted, only survival did. And for a dressage rider of eight years, somwhere (i think it was those lunge line hours) i learned to survive.
Oh yeah. and this is only five minutes into the hunt. It lasted two and a half hours!!!
And those fox hunter people!!! they are crazy! No really! The whole group ended up at the top of this huge ravine and they kept eyeing this ravine like there was a path or something. I, being the kind, caring, person i am and looking out for my fellow riders, tried to convince them that WE WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!!! but they didnt beleive me (except for my horse) and we went down, and up the biggest scariest ravine i have ever seen. And i am a dressage rider and i see lots of scary ravines! This one was worse then the mud hole in the indoor when the roof leaked!!! Can you imagine!!!
And anyway, that is that.
I am still barely alive, mostly thanks to the emergancy manicure service, my horse is still trembling in his stall (though a new matching plaid stable blankets set has somewhat pacified him)
but dont worry local foxhunters,
We’ll be back!!!