Probably a good thing for everyone in the horse sport/industry to read and consider these suggestions again. Eight arrests in eight months in a pretty small population is a lot!
1 Like
Here is the link to the article/OpEd referenced in the title: https://www.chronofhorse.com/article/after-8-arrests-in-8-months-its-time-to-start-talking-prevention/
5 Likes
Prevention is obviously really important.
At the moment though I think we are seeing a lot of cases from the past getting dealt with. I am not sure we are seeing any cases yet that happened after SS was created, though I haven’t been following that closely.
3 Likes
This is definitely not an accurate statement, there have been old cases but the arrests also include some new ones. Sam Berry is one example of a recent situation. Both SS and law enforcement took action once that one was reported by one of the victims.
5 Likes
There are more “new cases” than old ones, because the old ones take more time to uncover and don’t get the priority for investigation, unless the offender is still around and actively involved in activities that are attached to or in proximity to youth sports. Older cases from the early-2000’s and farther back can take years to investigate because of time passage and the difficulty of gathering evidence and records/interviewing to gather information.
1 Like
I’m passionate about this topic.
When I was in high school, I worked for a trainer who was a sexual predator. I was not a victim, but my family and friends were.
He recently died and I was overcome with relief. I didn’t know what to do with the information I carried around my entire life. I knew my info was 100% factual. But I also couldn’t understand why the survivors didn’t go after him, especially when SafeSport came into existence.
Out of respect for them, I chose not to report, knowing it was the “wrong” answer but also not wanting to open up old wounds for those I love.
It is absolutely disgusting to me that many prominent riders will die on a hill defending the status quo instead of adopting the most benign practices to keep kids safe.
It doesn’t even take the 9 suggestions in the op-Ed, though they are all excellent suggestions. There only needs to be one rule: don’t have sex with your students. Is that really so difficult?
27 Likes
I really believe part of the problem is that as a society we idolize coaches/trainers/etc. It’s not just a horse world problem, it’s a society problem. Any time you put someone in charge of other people, you have a power imbalance that can lead to issues. When you put someone in charge of minors, who are told to always listen to adults, it can be a recipe for disaster. Sexual abuse is not just a horse world problem.
However, I think the nature of our sport does allow for predators to take advantage of it. How many practices does a football player have one on one? Probably not that many. And if they started happening regularly, that would probably raise a red flag for parents. But in the horse world it’s almost standard to have one on one lessons.
Plus, many kids are ‘barn rats’ spending hours on the barn, usually alone or one on one with the trainer or staff. That also puts kids at risk.
There’s other sports that have similar issues (dance for one). Maybe we should start looking outwards to find solutions.
2 Likes
I can say in my situation, this was a huge part of it.
Trainer would promise us the world: money, lessons, shows, horses, even puppies. All in exchange for just staying at the farm a little longer, helping him with this or doing that. It snowballed into something that was almost cult-like: you felt like you HAD to be there all the time, either because you owed him or he promised you something and had yet to deliver.
While he kept me in his network of teenage girls, he never made a move on me. In my warped teenage mind, I thought it was because I wasn’t good enough, wasn’t pretty enough. 
Now in adulthood, I think I was just too hard to groom. I had goals beyond what he could offer. My reason for being there was money— he paid me a lot (when he actually paid me, probably a grooming tactic to pay me inconsistently to keep me coming back). I used that money for shows and lessons in a different discipline. I didn’t want his horses, I wanted to do my own thing.
Everyone always asks “where are the parents?” to which I call BS. They were right there much of the time! They had NO idea. They did everything right. Their only mistake was trusting someone with a stellar reputation in his discipline.
17 Likes
Yeah, and the hard part is that being a barn rat or working student is SUCH an ingrained part of our sport. It’s pretty much a given that if you want to go pro, you have to be a working student. I loved being a working student (I was one during my teenage years and part time in my late teens/early 20’s), but looking back I realize how easy it would have been for someone to have taken advantage of me. And, if they had, how unlikely it would have been that anyone would have believed me.
5 Likes
My family owns a sports performance company and about 75% of our clients are teens or college students so I will chime in a little here. Things we can do as clients and as pros:
-
Teach your children about healthy boundaries. Not just physical, but emotional boundaries as well! It is something I think prior generations didn’t talk about as much. Be open with them about people-pleasing, their own self worth, that they even need boundaries with their friends. Talk about how they can be kind humans without being responsible for the feelings of others. Grooming doesn’t start with a physical interaction, it starts with the predator breaking down boundaries very slowly and pushing back that grey area bit by bit.
-
Cameras. I have cameras in our facility not just for security, but also for everyone’s protection. As part of our standard waiver all of our clients sign off saying they acknowledge we have security cameras going at all times. This protects them AND us. A few years back a competitor of ours got nailed because an employee was engaging with young girls and taking them into a hallway where there were not cameras. We intentionally built out our facility so almost everything can be viewed from our office. This really should be normalized as much as possible in facilities that include children.
-
I was the victim of a horrific stalking incident and as such I don’t trust people easily at all. I am not paranoid but I run a full background check on ANYONE who we employee. This includes the person coming in to clean, an instructor who only teaches 3 hours a week, and even contractors we may just partner with on events. This protects me and the children we are entrusted with. Fool-proof? No, but it has certainly uncovered some red flags for me before that made me pass on doing business with someone.
-
Read your kids devices. Constantly. Stay up to date on the latest tech, apps, and ways kids are sneaking around. If you want to give your teens a sense of privacy then agree on a trusted adult that isn’t mom or dad to check your kids phone. I have served as the “adult phone supervisor” for a few teens. I could check the phone at any time, but if I found anything concerning we would all sit down and talk about it together (Mom and/or Dad included.) I know, your kid would “never do anything like that” or “isn’t that kind of kid” - they are. They will. Stay informed - it can save your kids life. I am always SHOCKED by the number or parents who think they don’t need to supervise their kid’s devices closely.
10 Likes
Adding on to #4. I know it’s hard to go through a kids phone. I know when I was a teen I was way more tech literate than my parents and probably would have figured out how to change the symbol for instagram to ‘study guide’ or something like that.
I’m not affiliated with this company but I really think it’s a great idea. It’s called Bark. They monitor your kids phone for bullying, grooming, harassment, going to unsafe websites, etc. If it detects something it sends you an alert. I personally think it’s pretty awesome. You do have to pay but it’s not that much.
4 Likes
Alex Lawler, Michael Traureg, the list goes on and on
1 Like
