A sad topic, sorry! With my guy getting older this is something I’ve been thinking about. Hopefully he has several more years left but one never knows and I certainly wouldn’t want to be clueless about what to do if it happens. Im in NoVA and burial at his farm isn’t an option.
Can you all share your wisdom on this? Even better if you’re in NoVA and have dealt with this before.
Again, he’s currently happy and overall healthy but I realize anything can happen at any given time.
There’s a service that will come pick up in our area. Ask your vet about it, they have the contact info.
If he passes naturally, some of the local hunts may pick him up for free to use as food… I personally couldn’t do that, but I do know that a few hunts will still do this.
Make sure to cut some tail hair off.
I totally understand how difficult this is to think about. I lost my old gelding at 38 (JC age) in Feb 2020. He was fit and feisty until the end but with a heart murmur that was getting more pronounced over the years. As at your barn, burial on-site was not allowed by local laws.
One thing I did in the last few years of his life is never go more than 2 hours drive away. I couldn’t imagine not being there relatively quickly if things started to go south.
As it would happen, I arrived at the barn mid-afternoon on a glorious warm and sunny SoCal winter day. I looked out across the property and saw him down in his field, out with his herd. The herd had been checked on at noon and everything was normal. I arrived at 1:30 and found him already gone.
My vet came out anyway for emotional support (thanks Cait 
!!). My vet, my BO and I sat with him (well, I layed on him) for the hour it took for “the truck” to get there. Your BO, like my BO, should have someone they normally call in these situations. I’m glad it took a while for the truck to get there. It gave me time to spend with him and pet him and cry all over his neck.
The BO’s daughter had called a couple of my barn friends, who left work early, to come out to be with me. They took me aside, out of sight of the loading process, while my vet stayed with him for that part. I would recommend you also not watch this part. You need to remember your horse in all their glory and not being put into the truck.
As the truck was leaving the property, it tore my heart out that he was leaving me. I actually thought I was dying as I could hardly breathe from the sobbing. But my lovely, lovely vet reminded me that what was leaving was just a shell and that my boy was running free again, young and healthy.
I’m praying that you have many more happy years together and that when it is finally time that all your wonderful memories will carry you through your grief. If you would like to PM me, please do.
Pam
The answer to this question is very area specific, just like you thought it would be.
No one, your vet or barn owner, will find it weird that you are planning ahead. Send your vet’s office an email (easy to answer whenever they are not as busy) asking what the options are in your area. I am sure your vet is used to this question and probably has a prepared answer.
We literally just had this happen at the barn.
On the way out to turnout, our resident matriarch mare went down and passed, just like that.
Where she was wasn’t conducive to “the truck” picking her up, so once the owner had said her goodbyes, she was moved to the front of the farm with the tractor, and covered with a blanket. “The truck” came yesterday - one day after she passed - and picked her up.
STRONGLY suggest you not be present for any of the moving of the body or “the truck”. It’s not an elegant process, moving around the body.
not here either but locally here there is company that specializes in removal and burial of horses. We have “family” plot with them were all of ours have been buried. The horses lived here together and they remain together afterwards
Your basic options are the rendering truck (or we have one around here that takes the bodies to a landfill), cremation (which leaves you with a large volume of ashes), or burial (but in another location, which you would have to find, and then you have the issue of getting the body there unless you have a planned euthanasia and can take him there while he’s still standing.) There’s also the much lesser used option of donation to a hunt, zoo, or wild animal park which usually requires a natural death or involves euthanasia by bullet. Beyond that it’s really a matter of what you prefer or can bear and what you can afford.
I was lucky to be able to bury my horse at his farm. I had checked into cremation, very expensive and you have to get the body there. Our vet and barn mgr. knew all the options
Worth thinking about is whether or not you want to be with the horse if he is euthanized. Some people say yes, some no, it is a personal decision.
As mentioned above, think about if you want tail hair to remember by itself or made into something. I THOUGHT I wanted this but weirdly in my horse’s last few days every time I got the scissors, I couldn’t bring myself to cut the hair.
I have almost always taken hair, but after my horse(s) have passed. And I think it’s very disrespectful to not be there when your horse passes (or your dog or cat) if they are euthanized. I don’t care how hard it is, it’s also the only right thing to do for an animal who has given you their life.
On the other hand, if you’re going to be an emotional wreck and upset your horse it’s best to not be there for euthanasia. An upset horse tends to fight the drugs. Ask someone the horse knows and trusts to be there in your place.
I too couldn’t cut my horses’ tails while they were still alive. I didn’t get my first horse’s tail but I did get the second because I regretted it the first time. I did get a bit of his mane.
My vet had the deadstock service contact info.
I think it is a horrible burden to put on someone to say that they are wrong to not be there.
Everyone deals with death differently and to some, being there at the end is just not possible.
Your pet lives in the moment. They don’t know that the needle coming is going to be their last.
Let the owner provide lots of love and step away if they are going to turn the moment into a mess.
It does not help the animal to have their owner melting down.
And before you pounce on me, I am there when my animals pass. I am also there when my friend who just can’t be there has a pet that needs to be put down. I think it takes a strong person to admit they just can’t and hand off control to someone else.
I agree that your barn owner/manager and the vet can help you figure it out. No shame in it. It’s better to be prepared.
I had to have my older mare (24) euthanized a couple months ago. The vet (bless her!) called around, afterwards, to see who could come and pick her up. The people who came own a family plot and that is where they bury horses. The truck’s driver told me to leave, saying I didn’t want to be there when he put the body in the truck.
I cut tail hairs years ago, when my mare was young, and made a bracelet with it. I’m glad I did. It would have been too hard to do it after she died.
I’ve been there for my 3 horses who had to be put down, over the years, but I totally understand if someone cannot bear to witness it.
It’s heart wrenching.
I’ve been present for every euthanasia of my pets but not everyone can be. Every person has a different threshold for what they can handle. Some choose not to be present and that is okay too.
I agree with others about cautioning you about being present for the disposal. It depends on what you can stomach. Inelegant is the perfect word for it. And you want to be careful too - my mom used to say you never want your last memory of something you love to be a bad one. I heard this as a kid any time we had to euthanize a pet, and it’s true. You won’t forget those last moments.
Some things to know:
If the horse passes unexpectedly and cannot be picked up immediately, learn to fold the body. This makes extraction much easier - both for the extractor and for the witness to bear. Take baling twine and fold up knees to chest, and hind limb to belly. Bring the horse’s head to his elbow and tie. The horse would look like it is sleeping. This makes it easier for the backhoe (or whatever machine is used to pick up the body – usually it’s a backhoe) to just scoop up the body, versus having people struggle to “roll” the stiff body into the bucket.
It’s harder to move the bodies when they are stiff - it is macabre, but in tight spaces it’s difficult to extract the body if legs are sticking out.
Your vet will have a list of people for you. One will likely be the service responsible for moving the remains. Others might be burial or crematorium services. There is really no wrong answer when it comes to what you choose. Some people want to cremate, some bury, some donate the body to zoos or hunts (provided no chemical euthanasia).
It is much better to be prepared. I was so unprepared my first time I lost a horse as an adult. I was in my early twenties living states away from every network I’d ever known. I didn’t even know who to call. My new vet (who had only ever seen him once)? My friend? My mom? Back then I didn’t know what I know now about the body either - getting my horse out of the stall was, as another poster said, absolutely inelegant.
Every death since has been easier than that first, because I have all these pieces sorted out now. It makes navigating the grief tremendously easier if you have and know your plan. So kudos to you for thinking ahead - it’s a crummy situation to be in, but you’re better off for making plans now.
Not sure what the veterinary hospital/clinic situation is like near you, but before I had to have my mare put down, I had never thought about euthanasia in that setting. If anything, I would have expected it to be perhaps too clinical and not allow me to properly say goodbye.
As it happened, after months of trying to get a lameness work up appt at the vet hospital because my vet was unable to fully diagnose at the farm, we ended up at the hospital for an emergency visit due to an infection (in the knee, likely from compensating while getting up or down), and while there, they were able to determine that the lameness included severe laminitis that presented unusually (in one hind foot) and only her stoicism had been allowing her to continue on it. It was too far gone to try saving her without putting her through a very long uncomfortable period for very little potential gain, so I opted to put her down at the hospital.
The experience was so much more pleasant than any on-farm euthanasia I have ever assisted with.
The staff were lovely, and brought me treats and grain to feed to her while I spent as much time with her as I needed before we were ready. They used an anaesthesia room to lower her to the ground gently, gave me as much time sitting down with her as I needed before the final injection, and gave as much time as I needed with her body afterwards. They even took care of braiding her tail and cutting it for me when I mentioned I wanted to keep it.
I was given the choice of paying to have her cremated alone, or paying just a very low fee to have her cremated with other animals, which is what I went with (I wasn’t interested in her ashes).
I also signed off on them being able to use her body for teaching, which allowed me to feel that something positive could come from her death.
I was able to leave her lying peacefully in the anaesthetic room and not have to worry about or watch anything that came after.
The only negative was a week later when I received a call from the hospital saying they had an appointment available for her work up; I wish their system had flagged that and not put me in the position of answering that call while my emotions were very raw.
All that to say that if the situation presents itself in such a way that a hospital euthanasia is an option, don’t assume that trailering your horse back home to do it on the farm would necessarily be the more pleasant ending.
Yes. “Inelegant” is the perfect word for it.
My Wallydoodle was such a macho dude (despite his nickname). So proud and sure of himself; almost regal. I’ll never forget how I purposely stroked his mane one last time, just so I could commit its texture and its mixture of colors to memory. God, I loved that horse. When I turned away he was staring off into the open prairie, eyeing some pronghorn antelope in the distance. And that’s the way I want to remember him, not in that “inelegant” manner.
This is the strangest and most judgemental response to someone who has clearly given this much thought and is trying to prepare. They haven’t said they won’t be there - but sometimes sh*t happens. Why not answer the question rather than judge?
I knew my old gal was failing and in some pain, the light in her eyes was gone. SoI picked a late September date, arranged for “ country burial” at a local pet cemetary with an equine section ( it a shared grave with no recorded location or marker) the vet and the truck. My barn owner had a senior who was nearing the end with severe bi lateral ringbone who would go with my mare, BO also would attend.
The day before was warm and sunny, late grass still green. Spent most of the afternoon with her. I chose not to be there the next morning but it was dignified and peaceful and both were ready to go. The truck was there within an hour and they were resting under lush meadow grass by late afternoon.
Its a hard decision to make but a relief to stop worrying about late night calls in bad weather asking you to deal with a tragic and possibly ugly situation requiring decisions when you are upset.
For whoever claims not being there is disrespectful? You are welcome to your opinion, not going to defend my choice but that opinion does reflect your kindness and compassion.
I also ended up letting my horse go in situation somewhat similar to yours - brought in for an infection and then discovery the degree of infection and additional complicating factors meant euthanasia was to best choice.
I elected not to be present for the actual moment - both the vet and my trainer who had come to support me encouraged me to leave. I preferred for my last memories to be of stuffing her full of treats. I’ve attended euthanasias as support for friends and all of them for my small pets but I have no regrets about my decision in this case.
The vet hospital took care of all the arrangements afterwards and then billed me after they received the invoice from the disposal company. They cut her tail and sent it back with my trainer. I elected not to ask for any cremation remains and was actually surprised that the cost was significantly less than I expected. As emotionally painful as it was, I was thankful that I didn’t have to worry about logistics.
Don’t be sorry - it is a sad topic but it really is one that it is good to be prepared for.
I totally agree with whoever said ask your vet via email. I would personally ask three sets of questions:
In many cases, you don’t have a choice but if you do have a choice I’d recommend:
*whatever the method, selecting a space that is out of view of the other horses, the barn car park etc.
*in an area easily accessible by large vehicles
*somewhere your boy feels relaxed
*decide what you want of his - if you want his shoes - ask your farrier this time for his shoes when he is re-shod. Deciding you want them off a dead horse - well, it is possible but let’s go back to the inelegant word.
*if you want tail hairs the best way I know of is to use a plaiting band and secure it at the top of a chunk of hair, plait down and secure with another band, then snip just above the top band. Depending on your horse, again you may be able to take a cheeky chunk of hair now and have it made into something while he is still here.
Much of this is about mental preparation for you, as much as what will actually happen on the day - as others have said, sometimes your turn up and the horse can’t get up; sometimes you’re walking out the stall and they collapse; sometimes injury or colic - a bit like human childdbirth - you can make a plan…
it is - as any death is, just the saddest thing to lose your buddy, the more questions you have now, the easier some of this will be when the time comes - he’s a lucky boy to have such a thoughtful person looking out for him and I hope you have many happy days ahead of you before you need any of this.
Yes - for the actual finality, it’s absolutely okay to not be there. My vet told me that she could not be there for the actual final shot with her own horse which gave me the courage to say my goodbyes and go.
I wish I had been more prepared - I had to say goodbye to my old gelding about 6 weeks ago. I was 100% NOT prepared for when it happened, despite my always saying it would never be a day too soon for him and that I wanted him to go on a good day. It wasn’t the best day for him (though he did get a half a bag of his favorite treats once I had made the decision, to him that was probably pretty awesome!!). At 24, he had cushings, had laminitis/white line in one hoof, recovered great and was back to turnout but got an abscess in that same hoof (and had a laminitic flare up over the summer). The abscess had seemed to be improving until about 5 days in when he was pretty much NWB in that hoof. He really couldn’t walk and couldn’t bear to see him struggling so - best guess is that it had gotten into the coffin bone (it was very close to the coffin bone on xray when we found it).
I had someone stay with him until the very end - I said my goodbyes up until then and I left. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do but even now, I think it was the right decision for me. Thankfully, our boarding barn already had the right people to call for disposal so I didn’t have to deal with any of that except to pay for it. I was and am extremely grateful for all the help I got.
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