Which doesn’t change that this language, used as a general broad brush, is abusive.
Both abusive stances and your situation can occur at the same time.
They are not mutually exclusive
Ok.
I tell my students, “You learn thru struggle.” I expect audience participation in my courses and that the professor is not doing a dog and pony show for their amusement.
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I think we’ve strayed a bit from the point that the OP actually witnessed some of these harsher interactions and their consequences. The OP was not simply reporting that a young student had told her about them. In fact, one of the issues seems to be that the students might not be telling anyone (including their parents) about the shouting and behavior of the coach.
So a prof being brought up on Title 9 charges by a hyper-sensitive student who got and deserved a B really isn’t analogous.
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And none of those are screaming, belittling and the other examples given.
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This thread has taken a bizarre turn. This isn’t about someone complaining excessively about a B.
Also, jeez, most kids ride to have fun. Keep them safe, don’t overface them, correct firmly and frequently, but don’t use it as an opportunity to throw a diva shit fit and make it all about your ego. They’ve taken a riding lesson, not joined the calvary.
This makes me think of all those other threads about “why aren’t kids riding today”? Wow, maybe they don’t enjoy crying every lesson.
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When did we make the leap to crying at every lesson?
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That I would have a problem with. Sounds like a trainer who needs a long break or a new career field.
Instead of you going to the coach, I would let the parents know what is going on in the lesson. I would hope they are at every lesson and would take the matter in their own hands but I don’t know what is normal for parents today.
If you approach the coach with this I think you will not be getting lessons anymore and not be allowed to view any other kids having theirs so make it good if you want to get involved.
In everyones best interests-- I truly believe it is the parents job to approach the coach on behalf of their child. You inform the parent of what you have witnessed and let them handle it.
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Two thoughts here, I saw this on the book of faces, in a discussion about people who try and learn without any help.
Finding the right coach is also a challenge as there are so many who are out there who think they are the bees knees.
Some who think they know but do not.
Some who do know but cannot teach - either expect others to already know what they grew up learning, “it’s common sense “. Therefore can sound condescending or ridicule others for not having this common sense.
Some who teach by just screaming louder with anger without considering a different approach would work better. Yelling only frustrates a student, degrades a person and gets them flustered and no one can learn that way.
A good coach can lead by example with a calm manner, a respect for both humans and animals with a mix of humour while always keeping safety at the forefront. (Proper footwear, clothing and helmets)
I guess we all have to find what suits us, we are all different, have different tolerance levels, vote with your feet if you feel that strongly.
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