I was just thinking about posting this on the H/J board earlier but then I found this section! This is amazing!
I have been having some medical problems lately that have impaired my ability to teach and do training (for safety purposes)
This whole process makes me ask “What if…?”
Are there any of you out there that have had to stop your actual careers as a horse professional?
Welcome to my world. For the last 5 years I have been strugling to try to teach and train and ride while dealing with lyme disease. Here is a bit of my struggle http://mylifewithlyme.com/index.php/august-2005-the-discovery-of-my-lyme-disease/
And yes, I am not teaching or training. In fact my hopeful upper level eventer was sent to another trainer to be sold.
The only good thing is I don’t have to worry about the one horse I have left sitting, as he is not 2 until July 28th.
thank you for your post. It was very inspiring you and everyone from the lyme post are all so courageous and unfortunately gave me more questions for the Dr.s
I am going through a battery of test right now and they are all coming back negative for various things. So far I can rule out brain tumors, stroke, blood clot in my brain, all other blood test are normal including Blood sugar, Cholesterol, other minerals and Vitamins, I am not anemic.
According to the Neurologist I have text book ear drums, and my sudden vision changes mean I need to go to the eye Dr, the memory loss and confusion/disorientation is due from sleep deprivation (even though I have averaged 7 hrs nightly in the last month I am prone to insomnia) and my dizziness is likely caused by my equilibrium changing at age 25. So I have to go see a Vestibular therapist.
I had my eyes tested today, My eyes are 1/4 point near sighted. the same I was the first time I went to the eye dr 12 years ago. So my loss of night vision and blurry vision in general is unexplained I thought it would be an easy solution
I had a EEG done this week with no results as of today.
I can’t ride because everyone is afraid of what will happen (even though I feel fine riding) I can’t lunge or chase my horse in the ring because after 15 years it suddenly makes me unaccountably dizzy. I’m dreading teaching because I can’t even sit on the side lines with out having the ring spin slightly. I can’t drive at night because I can’t see signs, I can’t tell where the road is and when I turn I have no depth perception. Then at night I sometimes get the spins laying down. I feel like I drank heavily all night and I didn’t even get to drink.
My typing has gone out the window, I forget things or do things and don’t remember. I text or write things that make no since to the current conversation.
I’m exhausted but I know I have low Vitamin D (big surprise I live in the north and have Seasonal Depression Disorder) combine that of the stress and waiting for test results and I’m surprised I can get out of bed and get my son to school in the morning.
I feel crazy especially when they say there’s nothing there…
Wow that felt good to get that all out:)
Well, this is a terrific forum for support. I am so sorry you are going through all of this, and I hope you can figure out what the issue is - that is a huge part of the battle!
Hearing hoofbeats, we keep thinking horses, but maybe it is a zebra.
Just one more zebra to check, have you had an echocardiogram and do you maybe have some seriously leaky valves?
[QUOTE=Bluey;4767068]
Hearing hoofbeats, we keep thinking horses, but maybe it is a zebra.
Just one more zebra to check, have you had an echocardiogram and do you maybe have some seriously leaky valves?[/QUOTE]
about 6 years ago foe palpitations everything was 100% at that time but I will certainly bring it up!
[QUOTE=nlk;4766813]
thank you for your post. It was very inspiring you and everyone from the lyme post are all so courageous and unfortunately gave me more questions for the Dr.s
I am going through a battery of test right now and they are all coming back negative for various things. So far I can rule out brain tumors, stroke, blood clot in my brain, all other blood test are normal including Blood sugar, Cholesterol, other minerals and Vitamins, I am not anemic.
According to the Neurologist I have text book ear drums, and my sudden vision changes mean I need to go to the eye Dr, the memory loss and confusion/disorientation is due from sleep deprivation (even though I have averaged 7 hrs nightly in the last month I am prone to insomnia) and my dizziness is likely caused by my equilibrium changing at age 25. So I have to go see a Vestibular therapist.
I had my eyes tested today, My eyes are 1/4 point near sighted. the same I was the first time I went to the eye dr 12 years ago. So my loss of night vision and blurry vision in general is unexplained I thought it would be an easy solution
I had a EEG done this week with no results as of today.
I can’t ride because everyone is afraid of what will happen (even though I feel fine riding) I can’t lunge or chase my horse in the ring because after 15 years it suddenly makes me unaccountably dizzy. I’m dreading teaching because I can’t even sit on the side lines with out having the ring spin slightly. I can’t drive at night because I can’t see signs, I can’t tell where the road is and when I turn I have no depth perception. Then at night I sometimes get the spins laying down. I feel like I drank heavily all night and I didn’t even get to drink.
My typing has gone out the window, I forget things or do things and don’t remember. I text or write things that make no since to the current conversation.
I’m exhausted but I know I have low Vitamin D (big surprise I live in the north and have Seasonal Depression Disorder) combine that of the stress and waiting for test results and I’m surprised I can get out of bed and get my son to school in the morning.
I feel crazy especially when they say there’s nothing there…
Wow that felt good to get that all out:)[/QUOTE]
Your zebra sounds a lot like my lyme disease.
I have been thru all the tests you have had, all negative, plus due to heart palpations and black outs had the tilt table test done, the stress test done, and all were ok, except the fact that I was still having heart problems on and off, would black out, vomit all the time, gained a TON of weight (not even going to go there), eye sight went from never needing glasses to needing them for everything, though driving at night still scares me ( though I can’t drive right now do to being house bound while on treatments). Lots of memory loss.
Have they done the two available tests for lyme disease? The regular one (which by the way has a 50% rate for showing you don’t have it but you do) and the other one is the Western Blot Test, which is a little better but still not 100% sure. The thing is that it has been shown that lymes can hide. Do you feel worse after a few weeks of feeling well (and by well I mean you are 50% yourself and still feel kinda crappy), then feel like you want to die? That is how mine is, that is the die off cycle of the lymes bugs.
It has definately influenced my career, for better and worse.
I cannot ride 6 - 8 horses a day anymore. Well, I can. But then I can’t do anything else, period. That lead to learning to do other things… I also trim now, as I have always been fascinated by hoofs. But that has its limits, too. I would have never learned all I have about nutrition, about rehab, if I could have kept riding 6 horses a day… because that’s really all I want to do :sadsmile: I have been forced to become a better horse person.
I am a better teacher because of it. I always enjoyed teaching… now I feel like teaching is my way to pass it forward and I have the years of a not-perfect life to add wisdom to that. Perspective is the word I am searching for here. I am a nicer person because I have fibro, I have more sympathy for other people’s struggles. I am also able to say to people “look… it’s hard… I know that… and if you want it you have to go on - and you can, I KNOW”.
Sorry
I know you are not looking for an armchair diagnosis but this sounds awfully familar. I am not a doctor nor do I play one on TV but have you been tested for MS?
A friend of mine who is a trainer has similar symptoms. She rides when she can and teaches but is careful not to get overtired.
[QUOTE=nlk;4766813]
thank you for your post. It was very inspiring you and everyone from the lyme post are all so courageous and unfortunately gave me more questions for the Dr.s
I am going through a battery of test right now and they are all coming back negative for various things. So far I can rule out brain tumors, stroke, blood clot in my brain, all other blood test are normal including Blood sugar, Cholesterol, other minerals and Vitamins, I am not anemic.
According to the Neurologist I have text book ear drums, and my sudden vision changes mean I need to go to the eye Dr, the memory loss and confusion/disorientation is due from sleep deprivation (even though I have averaged 7 hrs nightly in the last month I am prone to insomnia) and my dizziness is likely caused by my equilibrium changing at age 25. So I have to go see a Vestibular therapist.
I had my eyes tested today, My eyes are 1/4 point near sighted. the same I was the first time I went to the eye dr 12 years ago. So my loss of night vision and blurry vision in general is unexplained I thought it would be an easy solution
I had a EEG done this week with no results as of today.
I can’t ride because everyone is afraid of what will happen (even though I feel fine riding) I can’t lunge or chase my horse in the ring because after 15 years it suddenly makes me unaccountably dizzy. I’m dreading teaching because I can’t even sit on the side lines with out having the ring spin slightly. I can’t drive at night because I can’t see signs, I can’t tell where the road is and when I turn I have no depth perception. Then at night I sometimes get the spins laying down. I feel like I drank heavily all night and I didn’t even get to drink.
My typing has gone out the window, I forget things or do things and don’t remember. I text or write things that make no since to the current conversation.
I’m exhausted but I know I have low Vitamin D (big surprise I live in the north and have Seasonal Depression Disorder) combine that of the stress and waiting for test results and I’m surprised I can get out of bed and get my son to school in the morning.
I feel crazy especially when they say there’s nothing there…
Wow that felt good to get that all out:)[/QUOTE]
Sounds like lyme to me (and maybe a co-infection or two)! Where do you live? Have you been tested? If so, have you been tested through Igenix or MD Labs?
Ditto the suggestion to get tested for Lymes. My step mom had been told for eons she had MS. Turned out it was chronic lymes. Her symptoms were very much like yours. May not be but the test is not terribly difficult to get and I know from my own experience trying to track down a “zebra” that any test that could lead to an answer is worth a try. I had hoped (seriously) that mine might be lymes too but it wasn’t…you have lots of jingles from this direction regardless.
Go get tested for Lyme. Listen to all us lyme suffering people. You don’t want to deal with this after it turns chronic. Trust me. And then the insurance companies won’t want to pay for your meds you need. I am dealing with this right now.
[QUOTE=nlk;4766270]
I was just thinking about posting this on the H/J board earlier but then I found this section! This is amazing!
I have been having some medical problems lately that have impaired my ability to teach and do training (for safety purposes)
This whole process makes me ask “What if…?”
Are there any of you out there that have had to stop your actual careers as a horse professional?[/QUOTE]
I had to stop my career as a horse professional because I was a wreck mentally.
[QUOTE=Noplainjane;4776331]
I had to stop my career as a horse professional because I was a wreck mentally.[/QUOTE]
I thought we were all wrecks mentally because we are in horses?:lol:
I am so glad they added this part of the forum on here. Gives us all a place to go.
Thank you everyone for your support and suggestions. I will be asking about the Lymes as well as a few other things such as Meniere’s disease.
I live in the great lakes area, I grew up tromping after my brothers in the woods which included swamp, marsh etc. along with being on a farm non stop since I was 14 or so. So yeah the Lyme disease is a very BIG possibility My mother and I talked about that the other night.
this is so wonderful that you we have a place like this to talk to one another to share insight and prayers.
[QUOTE=GaellentQuest;4776375]
I thought we were all wrecks mentally because we are in horses?:lol:
I am so glad they added this part of the forum on here. Gives us all a place to go.[/QUOTE]
Yep that’s true.
I was nuttier than most for various reasons horse related and non- horse related.
[QUOTE=nlk;4766813]
thank you for your post. It was very inspiring you and everyone from the lyme post are all so courageous and unfortunately gave me more questions for the Dr.s
I am going through a battery of test right now and they are all coming back negative for various things. So far I can rule out brain tumors, stroke, blood clot in my brain, all other blood test are normal including Blood sugar, Cholesterol, other minerals and Vitamins, I am not anemic.
According to the Neurologist I have text book ear drums, and my sudden vision changes mean I need to go to the eye Dr, the memory loss and confusion/disorientation is due from sleep deprivation (even though I have averaged 7 hrs nightly in the last month I am prone to insomnia) and my dizziness is likely caused by my equilibrium changing at age 25. So I have to go see a Vestibular therapist.
I had my eyes tested today, My eyes are 1/4 point near sighted. the same I was the first time I went to the eye dr 12 years ago. So my loss of night vision and blurry vision in general is unexplained I thought it would be an easy solution
I had a EEG done this week with no results as of today.
I can’t ride because everyone is afraid of what will happen (even though I feel fine riding) I can’t lunge or chase my horse in the ring because after 15 years it suddenly makes me unaccountably dizzy. I’m dreading teaching because I can’t even sit on the side lines with out having the ring spin slightly. I can’t drive at night because I can’t see signs, I can’t tell where the road is and when I turn I have no depth perception. Then at night I sometimes get the spins laying down. I feel like I drank heavily all night and I didn’t even get to drink.
My typing has gone out the window, I forget things or do things and don’t remember. I text or write things that make no since to the current conversation.
I’m exhausted but I know I have low Vitamin D (big surprise I live in the north and have Seasonal Depression Disorder) combine that of the stress and waiting for test results and I’m surprised I can get out of bed and get my son to school in the morning.
I feel crazy especially when they say there’s nothing there…
Wow that felt good to get that all out:)[/QUOTE]
i betyou are devastated unreal
[QUOTE=Noplainjane;4778763]
Yep that’s true.
I was nuttier than most for various reasons horse related and non- horse related.[/QUOTE]
that is so true i am in this forum we have to have a name for it
I have joint pain and muscle pain and pain in my abdomen and the Dr. says it is all in my mind. There is nothing physically wrong with me and he wanted to dose me up on Anti-Depressants. The first one called Paxil knocked me down so bad I crawled to the bathroom on my hands and knees. I spent the rest of the time in bed. I stopped taking it. Then they gave me Norpramin. I gained 85 pounds on it and looked like a moon face. My hands and feet swelled to where I could hardly get womens 12’s on my feet. My hands looked like balloons. I refuse to be experimented on any more.
I will not take any Anti-Drepessants now.
I refused to see that Dr again.
A recent Dr. visit , a young Dr. said he thought I had Fibromyalgia. Any cure? Don’t know. Just take pain pills and keep quiet.
Yes my health issues have stopped my work with horses entirely. I can’t afford to have a horse at all now.
I loved training and retraining horses. I got some good homes for the rescue cases I had. They were green as grass when I got them. I loved teaching them to obey word commands and hand signals. They loved doing it too.
I miss that work. But circumstances are different now. It is just not possible for me to do it now.
I am just sorry these Dr’s have a pat answer when you don’t fit into their preconcieved ideas about women’s illnesses. If they can’t find out what the problem is then it is all in your mind.
“You are just imagining you are ill. Or you are a hypochondriac. You just want attention.”. You are lazy and want to get out of work."
So when I die will they do a post mortem to see what the real reason was I was sick. I doubt it. Maybe I really didn’t die. Maybe it was all in my mind.
I just do not bother them now. I just live with the pain and hope I can get through another day.
I guess you can tell I have had some bad experiences with Dr’s.
One day with the horses is worth 10 elsewhere.
I hope you can get a better diagnosis than I get.
I am very disappointed in the Medical Industry.
JMHO
sadlmakr
yes, me!
I have had to leave:cry: my profession as instructor/ trainer/ clinician/ barn manager:cry:; for the past ten years I have been looking for a vocation I could do; sadly DRS :mad:labels me unemployable:cry:;
so, whatever I/ would like to do, I must learn and do on my own :eek:($)
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