Seriously worse than my master gardener neighbor. I am so sorry!
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A few years ago I had a half-leaser ask if she could pull my horse’s really nice, healthy, but slightly long mane. I hate pulling manes so I thought it was a win-win. I came back from riding my other horse and boy was that mane pulled! There were like 3 strands of hair left. But technically she did ask and I did say yes…
The same person also took it upon herself to soak another horse’s foot when I wasn’t there (not the one she was leasing!!) after the vet and I had decided that soaking wasn’t doing any good at that point and we needed to let it dry out. She texted me afterwards instead of asking if I wanted it done. No major harm done I’m sure but I was pretty pissed and had a bit of a CTJ with her about handling horses without permission. That was one of the reasons I decided not to do on-farm leases anymore.
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Yeah no, NOT COOL to do that to someone else’s horse unless specifically asked to.
I know exactly how you feel – exactly – because this happened to my horse once, back in my boarding days.
A kid at the barn decided to practice her mane pulling skills, and decided my darling gelding (with perfect manners) was the ideal candidate, unbeknownst to me. The BO had been aware, but nobody stopped her. Kid was totally mystified about my being upset – in her world view, I should have been grateful.
This episode, along with the flagrant borrowing of my tack – also without permission – is a lot of why I eventually changed barns, even though the actual horse care there was excellent.
Your horse was a good boy to tolerate it.
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I am so waiting for the update on this…
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I assume, OP that future ride loans are off the book.
In my current sport you NEVER touch another person’s equipment without permission. Not even my coach touches my bow without asking.
It is ingrained. I would have serious word with the person and if a minor, in the presence of parent. Barn manager / trainer and owner needs in on this too
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Well, if she really thought she was doing you a favor, now she can indeed do you a favor and braid for you and perhaps keep your relationship civil. I imagine she’ll have to add a lot of yarn and do hunter braids. I cannot imagine doing poufy braids on a mane that short.
Totally speechless 
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I would be livid. My horse hates having her mane pulled. Also, it’s not her horse! I don’t understand why someone would do that at all.
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I can’t believe that she did that. Is the barn owner aware? Usually there is something in the contract that specifically prohibits you from messing with other boarders’ horses.
I did know a person either leasing or half leasing a lesson horse that did this, got the mane way too short, and a discussion resulted. I could see how it happened because it was a teen that probably just didn’t know any better.
I just cannot imagine pulling out another person’s horse and pulling the mane. That’s crazy.
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Not to mention that people have differing opinions on this stuff! I’m a good mane puller; can usually get horses that despise having it done stand for me because I’m gentle & go slow & listen to them. However, I no longer pull manes! I’ve gone over to the European method of cutting or Solo combing. Don’t trim whiskers, either.
Idk. It’s a lot like cutting someone’s child’s hair or nails without their permission. I remember my FIL (who is generally lovely) cutting my then 20 month old daughter’s nails without asking & accidentally quicking her & drawing blood 
I’m not one to lose my temper but I hit the forking ceiling over that one.
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I’ve never heard of that being in a contract because I feel like that’s just not the type of thing that needs to be said, you just don’t do that… ever.
My fellow co-op boarders and I are all pretty close and are constantly flyspraying, applying meds, blanketing, feeding, or watering someone else’s horse if the horse needs it (often without asking) but never could I imagine pulling somebody else’s horse’s mane.
I just cannot imagine how she thought that was ok… Is it typical for her to groom your horse? Doesn’t she have her own?
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Wow. Seriously? Who does that?? I would be so angry!!
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Years ago, someone in the barn cut the tail of my lease horse so that it just about hock level. She just rode there. Didn’t own that horse – or any other. I just about hit the roof. It took so long for that tail to grow to a length that was even remotely acceptable. She did it because she thought it would “look neater.” If I could have held her down, I would have made her hair look neater, too.
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Interesting how things are so different in different places. I think every boarding contract I have ever seen has a clause about not touching other horses with out permission.
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I would let the BO/BM know what the boarder did and let them decide if they should talk to her or just you. They need to know that boarders are doing things to other peoples (boarders) horses without permission. There is a lot that can fall out because of this like liability. Sorry this happened, in the future if you loan a horse out for a couple of rides you might want a contract stating such, that this is just a # of rides use, no other interaction with the horse is allowed etc.
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I finally learned this year that it’s easier to just never, ever share your horse at all.
I had an older woman get attached to him, bring a friend who is now attached to him, and the two of them have become such a pain in my ass that it is a literal daily battle of “please don’t do that.”
Words are about to be had but the message is - you can never overestimate how much sharing your horse with a person will make them entitled and inappropriate.
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Yes, I part leased my horse a few times and finally, after two bad experiences, stopped. The second time, the lady just got too attached to my mare and started feeling like she had a “say” in too many things. The horse was for sale and I finally told her to just buy the mare if she wanted to make those decisions. Luckily the horse sold before it got ugly.
The other time, I arrived at the barn to find my lessee riding my horse. Not his day. I had hired a babysitter so that I could come ride my horse. He said he didn’t use his time because it was “too hot.” Lease ended on the spot.
I have had good experiences, too. For the past two years I had a nice young woman come and ride my TB. She was in college nearby and she loved him. I never charged her, just asked her to help with a few things. She was completely respectful and a delight to ride with when I saw her.
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I have never been in a boarding situation where there was a clause about touching / handling other persons horses. I suspect , where it shows up, that it is there because of some incident like the OPs
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I would be absolutely livid if this happened to my horse. I think pulling hair is unethical and do not ever want anyone, under any circumstances, to pull my horse’s mane.
I have a lease pony (full lease/off farm) and I trimmed her mane and tail a little tiny bit with scissors to even it up for event camp and a show, if I was going to do anything more drastic than that, I would have absolutely inquired with her owner.
I’m just appalled that someone would do this.
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