British eventer Caroline March passes voluntarily

Well, we really can’t say, even if there is only one person in the world that wants/needs that option, it should be honored as their right to that choice, not for any other to question?

Our vet decades ago was a barn rat in our race horse breeding and training operation.
He went on to become a vet at the top of his class, with an additional degree as an entomologist and was in demand, went as a consultant to South America and Africa, a very interesting and full life, we may say.
Well, he had Tourette’s syndrome, that made his life very difficult.
Lost plenty of clients that though he was rude, here and there bursting out with odd noises and at times cussing, admittedly disturbing to some.

He fought Tourette’s and depression all his life, he was on all kinds of medications over years, his life was great, he admitted, but also said his problems were so bad at times it was extremely painful, as bad as the worst physical pain.

For the years he was our vet, he came several times a week, especially during breeding season, he left vet supplies with us and would leave the clinic and ran the 30 miles to us, tended to the horses and ran back, unless rarely, he had an emergency waiting, then we drove him back.
He said running helped him more than medications.

At 43, he kept getting off his medication, side effects were unacceptable, kept him from doing his job properly and he hung himself from a tree in his yard.
Mind you, he had all kinds of knowledge and medications on hand to go to sleep and not woke up, that was surprising.

We never know what others go thru, we should not judge their lives and find them lacking and decide they are not good enough, should have done this or that differently and tell the world that in situations like this one, that impacts so many in so many ways.
Mental health problems can be as devastating as any physical ailments.

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Hit a nerve? Basically you’re saying it was her right to make a statement that if you are an athete with a spinal cord injury life isn’t worth living, she made the choice for herself, publically with a public statement. That has an effect on others. How about the people at the hospital that saved her after she was injured? The other people in the ward with similar injuries. I never said she had to be inspirational, I was saying she had options she very clearly rejected. And then publically said so. If you can’t see that sends a message to able bodied people that this is right, and good and acceptable, all you have to do is read the comments. It diminishes other people’s lives with similar injuries, diminishes their ability to believe in themselves and their choices. Mad at me? Fine be mad. I’m mad for reasons stated this and previous posts. And the backlash speaks volumes about what you and others don’t get about abelism. Follow Imani aka crutches and spice on various social media. It’s an education.

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Yes, she did.

Yes, she did.

No, it does not. Because you are not her and she is not you. You choose to live with your disability. She did not. Both choices are valid, and I support you both.

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I read Darkmoon’s posts as the world saying - it is OK because you were disabled and being disabled means it is OK to say your life has no purpose - and that is hurtful to her and other disabled people.

That might not be what people are intending to say. But I can see how it can be taken that way.

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No one should have to live on, based on some cockamamie implication that they’re supposed to live a life of activism or some crap, due to something that was thrusted upon them.

Isn’t activism supposed to be genuine, and not through gritted teeth? Darkmoon is basically saying she needed to just suck it up and live on for all the other disabled people out there.

Screw that. At some point, Caroline’s mental well being should be the 100% focus, and to not see it that way is outright selfish. “She didn’t think of what she could have done for me/other disabled people!” Yeah, and?

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It saddens me that this has become a discussion of wether or not her “reasons” were “valid” or if they make a statement to the whole of the disabled community.

In Canada Medical Assistance in Dying is a choice one has, as determined by a collaboration of an individual and their medical team.

Of course, we all have opinions about the choices and decisions of others. But to say that an individual’s choice about their OWN life somehow makes a dire statement to an entire future community of people that would somehow sway them all towards death over a “productive” (as defined by whom??) life? Maybe self reflect a little that YOUR decision for them would be asking someone to live a miserable life so as not to influence other, independent, individuals. So YOU can feel better?

Of course, I’m looking through the lense of just having had one parent with a quick acting brain cancer choose MAiD, and then now another parent possibly facing a similar decision in the future as they start the journey with a progressive neurodegenerative disease. So yes, I’m personally squarely on the side of not judging individual choices.

I’m also very grateful that my country offers these choices to our citizens. Dignified death should be a universal right.

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It is just very sad such a bright light is gone.

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I just read an article today about MAiD because a father is trying to to stop his 27 yr old daughter from pursuing it, and part of the reasoning was “it would cause profound grief”

The judges response

M.V.'s dignity and right to self-determination outweighs the important matters raised by W.V. and the harm that he will suffer in losing M.V.," wrote Feasby in his 34-page written decision issued Monday.

“Though I find that W.V. has raised serious issues, I conclude that M.V.'s autonomy and dignity interests outweigh competing considerations.”

We can draw parallel lines between this and being pro choice. You aren’t pro choice if you put restrictions on abortion. So if you support a victim of rape but not consensual sex. Or for a life threatening medical condition but not from one that can be managed. Supporting assisted death for terminal illness but not for mental health or life altering injuries. You either support it or you let your own biases put restrictions on your support.

Finally, activism is still a choice not a duty and it shouldn’t be the burden of those most affected. It’s not her job to teach others to live their life. She still has done so much by taking this step and it’s immensely brave and considerate to have had the ability to do it on her terms with her personality intack.

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Thank you, EAD. I am sorry for your loss but support your parent’s decision. I have friends who have chosen MAID and I am relieved that this option was available to them. I know that I am relieved that this would be available to me should the need arise and I hope that the limits in place for Alzheimer’s patients are lifted.
I too am sad that Caroline’s decision - her decision and choice about her body and her life - is somehow being dismissed and attacked as “ableist crap” .

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You said it better than I did, AM.

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Well said AMWookey

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I find the issue of MAID very complicated, especially when mental health issues are involved. I don’t think it is wrong to have a wide range of emotions regarding the situation.

RIP, Caroline.

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Canada chooses not to help disabled people live, aka housing, and access to care but does provide MAID. That isn’t exactly a good example. It goes to the heart of the point of why a person not actively dying chooses to end their life because they themselves and the world at large chooses to see living with a disability as an awful thing they don’t want.

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Errrr… I think you have some self-educating to do…

Sounding a little conspiracy driven there. Of course every system needs improvement, but no, Canada does not open the MAiD door easily, and it certainly doesn’t encourage it over other social services.

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As I said endless, since you’ve chosen to react how you are that I do not think she had to be what we in the disabled community call “inspiration porn”. That isn’t what Christopher Reeves nor Stephen Hawking did with their lives. However in choosing to make a public statement it has sent a message that euthansia for a spinal injury is good, and it isn’t. I went over to horse and hound message board and first post is someone saying emphatically they’d do the same if they had a similar injury. As for the appropriateness of discussing it about Caroline she opened the conversation with her letter and didn’t choose to stick around for the debate or larger consequences, which is what I’m talking about, because her choice in the way she went about it sent a larger message that not everyone agrees with or finds laudable. Btw if someone chooses to crochet or whatever with their time disabled or not belittling it as an attempt at a comback is just as ableist. Seeing her decision in a larger view is not something I will shut up about simply because you disagree or don’t like it (or me).

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Absolutely disgusting. I’m done with you.

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You act like anything I’m saying isn’t what the disability community isn’t openly discussing right now, and they are. I guess you just don’t care what disabled people think on the subject.

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You’re right, I don’t. I care ONLY what Caroline March wanted with HER body.

That’s it. Anyone else can stuff it as far as I’m concerned.

You do you, in the way you want to do it. Everyone else, same.

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Not a conspiracy theory, it is the reality.

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Seriously!

I sometimes think there is this demand that people who are suffering various illnesses or physical challenges to persevere to be “inspirations” to others. Maybe she didn’t want to be a fucking inspiration, or to live as some “proof against ableism” or whatever. She wanted to live on her terms.

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