Buyer asking sellers: Tips for being a good shopper/buyer?

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

I’m posting this in Hunting because that’s pretty much been my horse-life for the last decade. However, it is unlikely that I will be hunting at all in the future… But I keep looking for hunt horse types so that’s why I’m here. Maybe I should cross post in Eventing…

I am looking for a new horse and it has been 4 years since my last shopping foray. (And that purchase was after 2 years of looking at and trying many horses.)

I’m an amateur and I hope when I buy a horse it will be forever. But we all do make mistakes and sometimes life changes things. I have learned from every horse I’ve had. And I know pretty much what qualities I DO want - and those that I don’t - and I have good reasons for just about every item on my wish list.

My question for sellers is this: do you want me to give you all my requirements up front? So we can both avoid wasting time if the horse you have advertised doesn’t meet my needs? And do you want me to explain WHY I have certain reqs? I’m glad to go into as much detail as you want. But it often seems that many sellers don’t read the emails I send when asking about a horse I have seen on line. I just love it when I have asked about a gelding, and my boilerplate wish list states geldings only, and they tell me the gelding I asked about has sold but they have this great mare I would just love… What don’t they get about “geldings only”? And please don’t lecture me about how wonderful mares are. I have had plenty of mares. Some of them were great. But right now, for MY situation, I CANNOT do a mare.

It scares me that if I have this much trouble communicating something as concrete as gender, how the heck am I supposed to discuss personality, trainability and learning style?

So, sellers, please tell me how to be a good buyer? How much do you want to know about my wish list? About my horsekeeping style? About my background? About the job I want the horse to do?

FWIW - my wish list does not describe a mythical unicorn or any freakishly rare skill set. Just very specific traits that I have thought about carefully. I also have an appropriate budget. And I am willing to travel to try a “made” horse, and/or find creative ways to eyeball a younger prospect. I am not a tire-kicker. And am very fortunate that I have a close friend who is a DVM, and another that is a trainer and both are happy to look at pix, vids, etc…

I have read all the threads I could find that were about buying and selling but never found an answer to the specific question: How can I be a good buyer?

Thanks much in advance for any responses!

Ps: I am currently helping a friend who is also horse shopping. On Saturday, she confirmed an appt to go try a horse today (Monday) that is about a 2 hour drive away. She called the seller this morning after we had been on the road for an hour, just to let him know we were on the way… His response? Oh - i sold that horse Saturday evening!!! WTF?? And he couldn’t be bothered to call and cancel her appt… REALLY discouraging…

[judybigredpony]

A good buyer knows what they want but will have some flexability within reason and an open mind.
A really good buyer has the full asking amount not including the PPE and shippig money Before they call!!!
A good buyer has a list of questions to ask or e-mail to have seller answer.***edited to add…by phone not texting!! and call when you have the time to actually talk in a relaxed atmosphere w/O barking dogs whining children or office phone demanding your attention…
A good buyer knows their riding capability and has a place to board the horse or space already,a way to ship horse etc.

A good buyer will cover the sellers gas if they drive the horse any distance to be tried to convience the buyer
A good buyer will have the ability to make-up their minds and not take 2 weeks ask for time and then still waffle, stringing the buyer along.

A good buyer doesn’t call ask if a horse is available, video, pictures etc, and then inform seller they have the money horse is perfect BUT are leaving for vacation and won’t be able to actually come see horse for a few weeks…and Oh Yeah if price goes up can they have price it is now not then…

A good buyer won’t call a seller ask for video’s, photo’s price negotiations/flex , arrange a time seller is to be available and then not follow thru and call to cancel or reschedule or say THanks no Thanks.

And all of this goes Both Ways to Buyer as well as Seller…

A good buyer doens’t ask for you to make a special video, and ask for your vet to watch horse jog to insure its sound…then say oh by the way I am still loooking at other horses but have your vet call after he jogs…???

A good buyer asks informed questions but doesn’t feel the need to divulge all their life history. Will arrive without small children and yapping dogs in tow, they are capable of making a desicion without a posse quarum.

My Monday buyer was awesome…she called in a timely fashion, asked for current video and photo’s and horses past performnace, etc.
Said they had $$$ for horse. Made appointment called on the way, came saw tried, liked, arranged for PPE, showed up Vetted, paid left with horse 5 days from start to finish…Good Buyer…

[HorseKrazy]

I am currently selling one of my horses, and its the first horse I’ve had for sale in a very long time! I typically buy and keep, haha! Since I am in love with the horse I have for sale I am very thorough and honest in my description of him because I want him to be in a home that will appreciate EVERYTHING about him, even the quirky stuff! after a few emails between the prospective buyer and myself I prefer to actually talk to the person/buyer. I find quite a few people that have been in contact with me only want to shoot emails back and forth and then schedule times to visit, this brings me to my first pet peeve-and my first requirement of the buyer: get on the phone! Lol! If you can’t call me then you are obviously not committed. Secondly be honest about your skill level… This one seems to be hard for some people… We all know how we want to ride, but do we actually do it?? I have had a couple people out to see my horse that overestimated their abilities or had the parent overestimate the childs abilities-obviously not gonna work! My horse is NOT a hard ride by any means, he is actually quite nice and pretty easy if you know how to correct the little stuff before they become issues. Thirdly, if you have any deal breakers let the seller know upfront-a good example would be your aversion to mares right now! ;)That being said it sounds like you are very clear in knowing what you are looking for, and as long as you can get straight answers from the seller, I don’t see why you should have a problem in this market finding a wonderful horse! Btw just out of curiosity what are your requirements… That could change my answer, lol!

[beanie_boomer]

Fox Wood –

You may be totally definite about what you want, and knowledgeable enough to make a good assessment – but I don’t have enough fingers and toes for the potential buyers who have come looking for something totally specific (and often inappropriate) and then have ultimately left with something that didn’t match very well with their original criteria, but perfect for what they actually needed – so I wouldn’t be too rough on the sellers that don’t have exactly what you want but might offer the closest match!

The ones that make me chuckle the most are the ones that would NEVER consider a TB because they think they are crazy, and leave with the quietest horse in the barn – which more often than not might be a TB mare!

[singletreestable]

Yes I agree with b&b… don’t fault the seller for offering what they think matchs your needs. They don’t know how well you have thought out your requirements or how definite you are on those said requirements! I once went with a student to buy a horse… their requirements, no mares, no greys, at least 16hh and between 6-10 years old, with a somewhat small budget… the student was a good rider but a novice and needed a horse who had been there done that and was quiet… the purchase… A grey mare, 15.2hh, 12 years old, and under budget… the out come THE PERFECT horse for the girl! (and I have said if they ever want to sell her I will buy her from them!) Two years later they STILL don’t want to sell her and the girl took her to college with her!

As far as being a good buyer… I will def. agree with the get on the phone suggestion!

As far as I can tell it sounds like you’ve been a good buyer but because “lots” of buyers aren’t good about knowing what they “really” need sellers are trying to do their best to offer what they have…

Good luck with your search!

[witherbee]

I think beanie is right - it’s like buying a wedding dress. Some people come in KNOWING what they want, but end up with something totally different.

As for the person telling you about their mare, it doesn’t mean they weren’t reading your requirements, it’s just that they have a nice mare available and want to let you know. Sometimes that is how word of mouth happens - you may not want the mare, but might tell someone else about her. What is the harm of them mentioning it?

Personally, as a seller, I like to have some fairly professional interactions to start, either via phone or email. If I get someone who is really wordy and gets into really detailed likes and dislikes or trainging methods up front, it tends to make me leery of them. I’ve had too many “touchy/feely unicorns and roses” types in the past to want to deal with them - the sale invariably doesn’t happen and these people waste a ton of time (and energy). I don’t mind being chatty and I do like to hear what a person is like after the intial email or phone call, or as we chat during that first call, just not up front. We horsepeople like to talk, but I prefer someone who gets a hint that it is time to get to business or that I have to get back to work etc. Anything that is a red flag that the person is needy or the type that will waffle and take up a lot of my time for weeks is something I avoid. Not good for me or for the horse IMO.

I think that no matter what you do, people are busy and some are just going ot blow past some of the info you provide. I would keep the first email or call short and to the point and just bullet out the main 3 things you are looking for and then fill in the detail if the seller’s horse matches those things.

It’s hard not to be discouraged (for both buyers and sellers). Sometimes we jump to conclusions about buyers because of other “types” we’ve dealth with (profiling lol!), but usually my gut is right about whether it will work out. I find that the right buyers are easy to deal with, and if the process is hard or is taking a long time, it never seems to work. I don’t push it or try to force it to work out.

Good luck, and just do your best and try to keep things as uncomplicated as possible.

[wateryglen]

Not a lot of experience here but…I wouldn’t wanna sell to anyone who’s not making the decisions themselves…I don’t wanna sell to a “committee” of “friends” or “advisors” or “vets/trainers” whatever. How on earth do you make them all happy?
And really…not sure if I’d wanna sell to someone who has a sex preference even…a good horse is a good horse. If they care about color first? Nope, don’t come! I think a lot of buyers have unrealistic lists of preferences.
They want perfect matches. I absolutely agree that many THINK they want this/that and are happy with something similar or like.
I think buyers are often…inflexible.
JMHO!!

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

Thanks!

Wow - thanks for all the info. Some things made me laugh. Some other things made me queasy… I’m going to respond to each of you in turn since you were so kind to give me honest reactions.

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

Thanks and response to JBRP

Quoting judybigredpony:

A good buyer knows what they want but will have some flexibility within reason and an open mind.
Check - I think I am both flexible and open-minded - within reason.

A really good buyer has the full asking amount not including the PPE and shipping money Before they call!!!
Check - I have never looked at (in person to try) any horse that I could not afford.
(Except once when the seller bugged me for days on end to come try his horse despite my having told him over and over that I could not afford him. I knew the seller and the horse. I did go ride him. I loved him. I did not buy him because I could not afford him. I asked only once if he could move on the price. He said NO and I said I’m sorry. Seller then continued to try to get me to buy that horse - at his price I couldn’t afford - even had the horse sending me text messages!!! LOL!! I did not buy that horse…)

A good buyer has a list of questions to ask or e-mail to have seller answer.***edited to add…by phone not texting!! and call when you have the time to actually talk in a relaxed atmosphere w/O barking dogs whining children or office phone demanding your attention…
Check - on having the list of questions to ask. I do admit that I prefer to make initial contact via email, especially when I am inquiring about a horse that is advertised on line and I don’t know the seller. I often think and write better in the middle of the night so emails seem more appropriate than a phone call at 3 am! I would never attempt meaningful communication by texting. If the email exchange results in my wanting to try the horse, then yes, at that point the phone is preferable - at a time convenient to BOTH seller and buyer.

A good buyer knows their riding capability and has a place to board the horse or space already,a way to ship horse etc.
Check, check and check.

A good buyer will cover the sellers gas if they drive the horse any distance to be tried to convenience the buyer .
Never had this situation come up but would certainly cover seller’s expenses.

A good buyer will have the ability to make-up their minds and not take 2 weeks ask for time and then still waffle, stringing the <seller> along.
I have never strung any seller along for 2 weeks. However, I am cautious by nature and might not want to make an IMMEDIATE decision - like before I’ve even dismounted from the test ride. I don’t think it is unrealistic to ask for a day - maybe 2 days max. (Unless there is a line of buyers out the door in a bidding war. :D) JBRP - I am curious what length of time you feel is reasonable to allow a buyer to make a decision after trying the horse? I was once pressured to make a decision after a test ride but BEFORE the PPE which I had scheduled for the morning after the ride. Guess what? Perfectly “sound” horse CROW-HOPPED away from flexions on both back legs. Didn’t buy that one either. (And I drove 20 hours round trip to try that one.)

A good buyer doesn’t call ask if a horse is available, video, pictures etc, and then inform seller they have the money horse is perfect BUT are leaving for vacation and won’t be able to actually come see horse for a few weeks…and Oh Yeah if price goes up can they have price it is now not then…
Well, that’s just plain rude!

A good buyer won’t call a seller ask for video’s, photo’s price negotiations/flex , arrange a time seller is to be available and then not follow thru and call to cancel or reschedule or say Thanks no Thanks.
And that is even more rude!

And all of this goes Both Ways to Buyer as well as Seller…
Yes - Thanks!

A good buyer doesn’t ask for you to make a special video, and ask for your vet to watch horse jog to insure its sound…then say oh by the way I am still looking at other horses but have your vet call after he jogs…???
That’s both rude and stupid.

A good buyer asks informed questions but doesn’t feel the need to divulge all their life history. Will arrive without small children and yapping dogs in tow, they are capable of making a decision without a posse quorum.
I’m a private, introverted loner who has no kids OR dogs! I will only tell you as much about me as you ask for or if there’s some issue relevant to the business at hand. And I really prefer to shop and test ride alone. I have resources I can call (on the spot) if I have a question about something I haven’t seen before.

My Monday buyer was awesome…she called in a timely fashion, asked for current video and photo’s and horses past performance, etc. Said they had $$$ for horse. Made appointment called on the way, came saw tried, liked, arranged for PPE, showed up Vetted, paid left with horse 5 days from start to finish…Good Buyer…
Good for you and the buyer and the horse!

Maybe I should be doing business with you!

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

Thanks and response to HK

Quoting HorseKrazy

I find quite a few people that have been in contact with me only want to shoot emails back and forth and then schedule times to visit, this brings me to my first pet peeve-and my first requirement of the buyer: get on the phone! Lol! If you can’t call me then you are obviously not committed.
Agreed that a phone call is appropriate if it comes to scheduling a visit. However, see my response to JBRP about whether you would rather have a phone call or an email at 3 am?

Secondly be honest about your skill level… This one seems to be hard for some people…
I “THINK” I am honest with myself about my skills. (But I know many people who are not.) However, I have decided that I am better off in the long run if I UNDERSELL my abilities. Just because I CAN ride a brat doesn’t mean that I HAVE to!

Thirdly, if you have any deal breakers let the seller know upfront-a good example would be your aversion to mares right now!

Agree 100%.

Btw just out of curiosity what are your requirements… That could change my answer, lol!

Patience, HK, patience… I’ll put my “specs” together after I finish comments to the other folks who have weighed in!

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

Thanks and response to b&b

Quoting beanie&boomer

I don’t have enough fingers and toes for the potential buyers who have come looking for something totally specific (and often inappropriate) and then have ultimately left with something that didn’t match very well with their original criteria, but perfect for what they actually needed – so I wouldn’t be too rough on the sellers that don’t have exactly what you want but might offer the closest match!
You are right, of course. I know folks who have done exactly that. And it is a very good seller who can see what the buyer actually needs and make that perfect partnership happen.

The ones that make me chuckle the most are the ones that would NEVER consider a TB because they think they are crazy, and leave with the quietest horse in the barn – which more often than not might be a TB mare

Best horses I ever had were OTTBs! Hoping I find one now!

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

Thanks and response to sts

Quoting singletreestable

I once went with a student to buy a horse… their requirements, no mares, no greys, at least 16hh and between 6-10 years old, with a somewhat small budget… the student was a good rider but a novice and needed a horse who had been there done that and was quiet… the purchase… A grey mare, 15.2hh, 12 years old, and under budget… the out come THE PERFECT horse for the girl!
I have to chuckle - EVERY one of my childhood nags was a small, gray mare. And I loved them all!

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

Thanks and response to witherbee

Quoting Witherbee:

As for the person telling you about their mare, it doesn’t mean they weren’t reading your requirements, it’s just that they have a nice mare available and want to let you know. Sometimes that is how word of mouth happens - you may not want the mare, but might tell someone else about her. What is the harm of them mentioning it?

No harm and you are right that I might tell someone else.

If I get someone who is really wordy and gets into really detailed likes and dislikes or training methods up front, it tends to make me leery of them. I’ve had too many “touchy/feely unicorns and roses” types in the past to want to deal with them - the sale invariably doesn’t happen and these people waste a ton of time (and energy).

We horsepeople like to talk, but I prefer someone who gets a hint that it is time to get to business or that I have to get back to work etc. Anything that is a red flag that the person is needy or the type that will waffle and take up a lot of my time for weeks is something I avoid. Not good for me or for the horse IMO.
I absolutely HATE it when other people waste my time. (Not just horse people!) So I do try very hard to not waste the seller’s time. I would rather spend an extra hour of emails, phone calls, etc… in the beginning to avoid wasting several hours - or days - trying out an unsuitable horse.

Sometimes we jump to conclusions about buyers because of other “types” we’ve dealt with (profiling lol!), but usually my gut is right about whether it will work out.
And, yes, that does work both ways. I have had my share of bad experiences with sellers that probably lead to my own profiling!

[dbolte]

My biggest pet peeve with buyers is those who make appointments and then don’t show up and don’t bother to call or even e-mail to let me know they won’t be able to make it. If you make the appointment, at least have the courtesy to let the seller know if you have to cancel it.

I have also had the situation where they come to look at horse A and end up falling in love with horse B, who is completely different, so I agree that I wouldn’t be too hard on the sellers who let you know about the other horses in their barn, even if they don’t seem to match your criteria exactly. That being said, if you have specifically requested no mares, I probably would not tell you about a mare I had, even if she was a great horse.

I think it important to be up front with the seller about your riding ability and your intended use of the horse as it will save everyone a lot of time and effort if the seller can recognize that their horse is not going to fit your needs prior to an actual visit; that being said, not all sellers are knowledgeable enough to recognize this, so it depends on who you are buying from.

Personally, I also appreciate it when the prospective buyer contacts me to tell me if they don’t think the horse will fit their needs, as opposed to those who just kind of drop off the face of the earth- seems a bit rude to me, especially if there has been extended communication or they have actually come out to see the horse.

[IronwoodFarm]

I sell between 5 - 10 horses a year. I sell an uncommon breed and basically know most of the bigger breeders and the local market.

My ideal buyer is someone who can articulate what they want. If I don’t have it available, I will try to refer you to someone who does. If it is a case that I have a horse that does everything desired but is not the designated gender, I will mention that. I understand completely if gender is a make or break issue. It never has been for me, so that’s why I would offer a suitable mare if I didn’t have a suitable gelding. It does not mean I am not listening or willing to communicate.

The clearer and more specific a buyer can be, the better. If you are buying a horse for your 8 year old child, tell me that upfront; don’t spring that on me after several days of emails. I’ve declined to sell specific horses as a child’s mount for suitability reasons. If my ad says that I want the horse to go to a show home; I am not kidding about that. As a breeder, I have spent time and money developing good performance horses in the breed. I am not going to sell a horse that is showing successfully to someone who just wants to trail ride.

I have no problem if someone comes out, tries a horse and finds it doesn’t suit them. I’m not going to waste my time or your time showing you a horse if I don’t think it would be suitable. I have met a number of fine people who have looked but not bought a horse from me. I have zero problem with that. Just don’t tell me that you’ll have to think about it or you’ll be in touch…if you know the horse is not what you want, just say so. I promise that I won’t be weeping in the hay loft. If you genuinely do have to think about it, fine but get a response back in whatever time frame you stated.

I am fine with trainers coming to see the client ride the horse or to ride the horse herself. However, if your trainer really wants to sell you a horse in his/her barn, then don’t be surprised that your trainer won’t like the horse (or any outside horse.) Also, whatever financial arrangment you make should not be one where the trainer sidles up to me and asks what commission I will pay the trainer to recommend the horse. Uh no, the trainer is the buyer agent and should be compensated by the buyer.

I’m very interested in having a good fit between the buyer and the horse. I try to treat all my prospective buyers the way I want to be treated, with promptness, honesty and courtesy.

[Fox_Wood_Farm]

Thanks and response to WG

Quoting wateryglen

Not a lot of experience here but…I wouldn’t wanna sell to anyone who’s not making the decisions themselves…I don’t wanna sell to a “committee” of “friends” or “advisors” or “vets/trainers” whatever. How on earth do you make them all happy?
I agree with you 100%. That’s why I like to shop alone. And I can decide the personality/temperament/talent issues for myself. But I do have a very close friend, also my vet for many years and she is a superb horseman in her own right. She has seen way more horses in her lifetime as a vet - let alone her own UL competitive riding - than I will ever see. If I see some aspect of conformation or weird bumps or scars, etc… that I haven’t seen before (and I have seen a lot), I am very glad that I have a resource that I can ask and trust the answer!

And really…not sure if I’d wanna sell to someone who has a sex preference even…a good horse is a good horse. If they care about color first? Nope, don’t come!
OK - this may be the first disagreement of this discussion! Here’s my deal about mares: I keep my horses at home. I have a small, quiet farmette that was designed by me to keep two horses. I don’t have horse neighbors. My 5 acre property is surrounded by forest. I already have the companion horse that will keep the new horse company. He is my 21yo OTTB gelding that I have had for 13 years and despite all his quirks - supreme cribber, bad feet, eccentric habits - and now retired due to a pasture injury he inflicted on himself 2 years ago - he will be mine forever. He is temporarily living with a friend of mine where there are a mix of mares and geldings in various pastures. MY horse goes absolutely STUPID around mares. He was not cut late, is not a crypto, never attempts any sort of actual sexual behavior. He just gets very attached to - and protective of - “his” mares. He does not display this sort of herd-boundness with geldings. Until the last few months where he has been away from me, he has always lived with geldings and he is fine. And doesn’t care where he is in the pecking order. Yes, he might holler once or twice when I take his (gelding) buddy out to ride but he will go absolutely stupid if you try to take his mares away where he is now. Because of my personal horsekeeping facilities, I CANNOT have clingy, needy herdbound horses. Whoever I have must be OK with being left totally alone while I have the other one out - whether that is a quick hack locally or a day long excursion. I KNOW that I would just be creating equine stress and personal turmoil to bring home a mare to my facilities with my other horse. I’m not going to move. And I hope my TB lives a long, long time. For me, that means no mares. (And I didn’t even talk about hormones and “marish mares” or worries about other male horses I might meet on the trail or hunt field. Those might be valid considerations, but aren’t even relevant in my situation.)

I think a lot of buyers have unrealistic lists of preferences. They want perfect matches.

I think buyers are often…inflexible.
You are so right. Lots of buyers fit your description. I’m not one of them!

Later on, I will post my little wish list and ya’ll can rip me apart!!! Actually I would like constructive feedback. But I didn’t want to start with my “want ad” because I don’t want to violate the advertising policies on the COTH boards. I think it’s obvious by now that I am not trolling for a free want ad or sellers, just honestly asking for advice.

[HorseKrazy]

Agreed on that last part^^^ please don’t just drop off! We take lots of time riding grooming and advertising- not to mention the countless emails and phone calls… If the horse isn’t a fit, take two seconds out of YOUR precious time to shoot an impersonal email of ‘thanks, but no thanks’ and if we sellers are really lucky maybe even expand upon that email to explain why the match may not work, I know I would appreciate some insight to the buyers reason for the deal breaker

[Carol_Ames]

dreams. use/ ambition

I would like to know what your hopes/:yes: plans/ dreams are for this horse

[otterhound]

We don’t sell very often, but when we do pretty well as soon as the “buyer” has introduced themselves on the phone and said what they’re ringing about, I start asking what, exactly, they’re looking for. What do they want the horse for, how much have they ridden, what expectations they have, and once they’ve answered those questions I can at least give them an idea of whether my horse may, or may not, suit them. I dislike wasting my time (and theirs) so would rather cut to the chase and find out whether we’re all on the same wavelength. If all sounds good, I’ll go into as much detail as I can about the horse, My main aim is to make sure the horse ends up with someone who will love it and look after it and not have any regrets about buying it.

[Beam_Me_Up]

Also an ammy, I do some buying and selling.

@Fox Wood Farm;6396494

My question for sellers is this: do you want me to give you all my requirements up front? So we can both avoid wasting time if the horse you have advertised doesn’t meet my needs?

If you are comfortable with that I think that’s an efficient approach. I have also talked to buyers who are kind of the reverse (ask me all about the horse and then decide if that meets their requirements). I think when I buy I tend to be the latter, but either way works.

[QUOTE=Fox Wood Farm;6396494]
It scares me that if I have this much trouble communicating something as concrete as gender, how the heck am I supposed to discuss personality, trainability and learning style? [/QUOTE]

Honestly, I find the subjective questions to be very difficult. Not that buyers shouldn’t ask, as you always get some good info, but I think the chances for miscommunication are high when talking about personality, quiet, reactive, learning style, etc. I have been asked all kinds of things that I really didn’t know how to answer (is your horse left or right brained, for instance) that I know frustrated buyers.

So I guess you have to take those communication challenges into account. I would expect a horse to be exactly the age/gender/height/color the seller described (not that it is, but it should be), but if their assessment of personality was not exactly the same as mine, that can happen.

FWIW I disagree with a couple of posters on some other points. (Not that they are wrong, just that not all sellers feel the same).

I am FINE with you bringing a trainer, or a more experienced friend. In fact, if you aren’t comfortable hopping on strange horses, then we will both feel better if you bring someone who is. I have had trainers hop on my horses for sale and say they think they are not quite right for the student, which was probably a much easier outcome than having the student get on first and struggle. If you need someone to “OK” your purchase, then it’s fine with me if you want to bring them on the first visit instead of scheduling more.

Also, I know I’m in the minority here, but I don’t think a buyer owes a seller an immediate verdict. If you know that you do or don’t want to buy the horse, then say so. But if you don’t, the horse is for sale until someone buys it. If you try some others, or get caught up vetting another one, or have a personal crisis and still want to buy it in weeks or months and I still have it for sale, I’ll still sell it to you. Not my fault if someone else bought it first, of course, but I’m not going to sit by the phone waiting for buyers to call back and say they aren’t interested. If they are, they can let me know.

Good luck in your search.