I have 2. Wake-up time is 5 a.m. Coordinated attack, multiple techniques. I was hoping they wouldn’t figure out daylight saving time, but somehow they did :eek:
My cat tries to meow at me as quietly as possible from the nightstand. Very quiet, slow meows… makes me think he’s trying to whisper.
This is one of my favourite kitty wake up cartoons
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMiAQkkLy1E
Ours just aggressively purrs in our faces and occasionally pats us with her paws. The amount of care she takes to sheath her claws is inversely proportional to how long it takes us to get up…
Her pièce de résistance is finding something breakable to knock off my dresser. As soon as she starts poking around over there I’m up.
[QUOTE=french fry;8062359]
Her pièce de résistance is finding something breakable to knock off my dresser. As soon as she starts poking around over there I’m up.[/QUOTE]
Cats are such jerks :lol:
Mine knocked my beside lamp onto my head one morning.
She stands on my full bladder and meows at me. 
[QUOTE=PaintPony;8063120]
She stands on my full bladder and meows at me. [/QUOTE]
These are making me laugh.
We have two house cats,both ex-barn cats, and each weighing in at around 20lbs and one elderly GSD with a weak bladder.
At least an hour before either of us intends to wake up, I hear the quiet tick tick tick of GSD feet on the hardwood floor. If I fall back to sleep, I will be very, very sorry…
So, I get up, let her out and then hurry back to bed.
Just as I start to fall back to sleep, the parade begins.
Both the cats march into the bedroom, singing the Song of Their People, in various keys.
One of them, the heaviest - Chin Strap, will jump up on the bed. Always on me.
He will then walk up my body, pausing to press with intent into my bladder, my breast, and if that doesn’t work, right on my windpipe.
As he is standing there, and I am trying to work out the PPSI of cat paws, he will purr loudly, stare intently into my face, and if I don’t wake up sneeze on me, or bite me hard on the cheek…
I get up.
They win.
Biting my nose, swatting my eyes, or running around the room.
All 27lbs of Janet lies on all 95lbs of my chest, reaches up, puts paw on face… Pause, wait… claws on face.
When aforementioned method is unsuccessful, he’ll lick my eyebrow, followed by curl up on face. Occasionally he’ll gently bite my clavicle or ear. Cats truly are dicks.
Screams at the top of her lungs! She started this though when she turned about 15 she didn’t always do this.
Cat lays down on my chest and puts paw on either side of my neck, starts purring, rubs against my face and then starts licking my face. Feels rather like I’m a kitten she’s holding down for it’s bath.
Mine usually do nothing. On rare occasions. Essie will poke at me repeatedly with her paw.
One walks across the TOP of the pillow, between my head and the headboard, such that she steps on little bits of my hair and pulls them. Another stands on my chest and pokes my face with his paw–which may or may not have claws outstretched. The more subtle one sidles up next to me and peers into my face–but he’s not averse to having a little snooze and cuddle before breakfast, so not too bad.
That, and the motivation that if Jinx doesn’t get fed when HE thinks it’s time, he will punish my tardiness by peeing rather obviously in an spot selected for maximum “HEY YOU HUMAN GET WITH THE PROGRAM” effect. (This morning it was the kitchen floor in front of the coffee maker.)
[QUOTE=Holly Jeanne;8067062]
Cat lays down on my chest and puts paw on either side of my neck, starts purring, rubs against my face and then starts licking my face. Feels rather like I’m a kitten she’s holding down for it’s bath.[/QUOTE]
There are some people who would pay good money for that.
My old guy, Topaz, (RIP) was always hungry. In my small house his dish was up on a counter, by a large window, with one set of metal blinds. He’d bat at those metal blinds so hard the whole thing would swing and <THUNK> into the adjacent cabinet. It would reverberate into the bedroom and he never had to get to thunk #3 because I would always stagger out and give him kibble. Without fail there was already kibble in his dish but it was STALE kibble, don’t ya know? I miss that big ol’ orange guy! My house is currently cat free with the thought that my MIL may one day need a spot to rest her cat if she takes ill. I tell NO ONE that I have a cat vacancy!
Depends on which cat…
Kiernan, if he is sleeping with me…continues to sleep until I get up. 
He’s an awesome little kitty. Comes when he calls, cuddles… (yes he still goes on counters and other annoying cat things). If he isn’t sleeping and is locked out of the bedroom, he tries to open the door by messing with the lever. He’s getting pretty close to learning to open it.
Now Dante, he’s just annoying. The wailing cry that some cats do. That’s his wake up call. Typically at 3am in the morning. It’s much better than what he did as a kitten, which consisted of biting any exposed piece of skin. HARD. I learned to sleep with my head under the covers. So glad he doesn’t do that anymore.
Sometimes, they chase each other all over the place. Which is usually why they get locked out.
My schedule is regular enough M-F that she seems to know my schedule better than I do. She usually allows the first snooze but a few minutes before my alarm goes off she starts her high-pitched scream meow while sprinting around the room.
Heaven forbid you sleep in. She can literally meow for a hour + without a single break.
The best cat I ever had (who I lost way too early 
) used to lay on my chest with an arm on each side of my neck, purr as loud as she could, and lick my entire face until I was annoyed enough to actually wake up and stay awake. She especially loved my eyebrows :lol:.
My alarm’s tone changes depending on which combination of cats happen to be inside overnight…
Big Fat Fluffy Cat, alone: excellent snooze and snuggle feature. Would not recommend relying on this one if you have an important meeting first thing in the morning!
Little Black Jinxy Cat, alone: adorable, gentle little chirps. “Brr!” wake up mom. “Brr!” feed me please? “Brr! Brrroow!” I’m literally starving to death! If I still don’t get up, she’ll snuggle for a little while.
Jinxy Cat & Dearest Katie Cat: "wrrrrrrrr. WorrrRRRRRR! *hiss * thump * thud * smack * “RAWR!”. This combination is sure to make you rise and shine!
Jinxy Cat & the Big Fat Fluffy Cat: kathump kathump kathump kathump WHAM! kathump kathump kathump kathump WHAM! These two like to RUN on our wood floors and then slide to a stop and slam into the wall. Then pick themselves up and RUN to the other wall.
Sigh. I love my kitties 
I love these!
My giant fluff ball has a strict routine. Is quiet and sleeping until about 3am when he gets up and proceeds to swat at the coiled wire door stops in the house. Nothing startles you out of a good sleep than the “BRRRRRRRGGGGGGGG” of one of those. He then proceeds to jump on my neck/chest/back and purr as loud as possible into my ears. Eventually we both fall back asleep and I usually find him contorted in some weird sleeping position at the foot of my bed in the morning. It’s like he gets bored halfway through the night and wants to hang out for a bit!
Allen will usually wait until I get up, since my internal clock gets me up no later than 7am on any day. With work I’m always up at 5:30-6, so he’s happy. Rarely he pesters me before that.
Sometimes, if he does, he’s just super lovey and rubs all over my face to get me up. Other times, especially when I’m on my stomach, I’ll look over my shoulder and he’s RIGHT THERE, cute little expression on his face.
“Hiya, Momma. You up?” :lol:
