Did I screw up re: unmounted etiquette?

[looseringsnaffle]

Hello, all.

I have a quick question.

I just moved to a new state, and am trying to get in touch with the equestrian community, here. In doing so, I ended up talking to an event organizer about an event, and later discovered she was a member of the local hunt. In fact, she was the Secretary.

In our email chats, I asked if I could perhaps meet her in person, maybe stop by and say hello and see the hounds off. She readily agreed, gave me a time and place to arrive, told me how to identify her, etc etc.

I arrived at the time given, waited about 20 minutes, and still did not see her truck/trailer. So, feeling like a sore thumb sitting in my car watching everyone tack up, I went ahead and got out and approached one of the staff. I introduced myself, explained the situation and who I was to meet. They were very, very welcoming and so very kind, and actually offered to let me ride with another member who was following the hounds via 4-wheel drive.

I did eventually meet the Secretary, when she arrived (after I spoke with the staff, etc). She informed me that she never told the Masters that I was coming to visit. This struck me as odd, but as the deed was done, there wasn’t much I could do at that point.

I made a point to thank the staff before I left that day, and when I got home, I got online and found the Master’s email on the hunt website, and wrote thank-you emails to both Masters. They were very kind, but one of the Masters mentioned being sorry that there was some confusion over our introductions. Don’t get me wrong - there was nothing rude or accusatory in the email to me.

But, still, I felt bad. Did I go about this the wrong way? I thought I did right by going through a member who invited me (unmounted), but now I am worried.

Any thoughts?

[jawa]

Sounds like the Secretary screwed up and that should be the person who felt uncomfortable about how the situation ended. It seems that the secretary wasn’t fully willing to take the blame for making you uncomfortable and leaving you hanging. If you want to attend another hunt function, I’d email the master to find out if its ok to come. He’ll answer yea or nay or send you back through the secretary. If it goes back through the secretary, maybe find a tackfull way to ask what should you do if you arrive before her, or if something should happen and she’s not present at the function.

[Bogie]

It doesn’t sound like you did anything wrong at all.

If you showed up at our hunt and was interested in learning more, any one of us would bring you over to someone who could help you.

[looseringsnaffle]

[QUOTE=jawa;4756036]
Sounds like the Secretary screwed up and that should be the person who felt uncomfortable about how the situation ended. It seems that the secretary wasn’t fully willing to take the blame for making you uncomfortable and leaving you hanging. If you want to attend another hunt function, I’d email the master to find out if its ok to come. He’ll answer yea or nay or send you back through the secretary. If it goes back through the secretary, maybe find a tackfull way to ask what should you do if you arrive before her, or if something should happen and she’s not present at the function.[/QUOTE]

Thanks for the feedback! Actually, both Masters invited me back very warmly, but I went ahead and asked for specifics as to just when I should come. I’m going back out next Sunday!

It doesn’t sound like you did anything wrong at all.

If you showed up at our hunt and was interested in learning more, any one of us would bring you over to someone who could help you.

Thanks for the reply! I try really hard to stay on top of etiquette, even though I’ve never actually hunted before.

[JSwan]

It sounds like the secretary made a mistake or there was some sort of mix up on the part of the secretary. It happens. Not your fault.

It also sounds like you did the polite thing and showed excellent manners, before during and after the hunt.

You get a smiley face from me. Here it is:

[armandh]

OP second paragraph

“In our email chats, I asked if I could perhaps meet her in person, maybe stop by and say hello and see the hounds off. She readily agreed, gave me a time and place to arrive, told me how to identify her, etc etc.”

this does not sound like showing up to hunt [mounted].
more like showing up to observe [unmounted].
which you did.
you were invited to the “car following” by a member
no blame on you.
sounds more like the master is sorry about the confusion.

[Trakehner]

Sounds pretty formal and mannerly dealings on everyone’s part. Sounds like a good day all around.

[lizathenag]

I think your mother raised you right.