Do our Horses "Love" us?

[Uncorked]

I was chatting with a co-worker this morning and she made that statement that she doesn’t believe horses love us…they only look to us for things. I asked her then about dogs and cats and she said they love us…I wanted to know the difference and she really couldn’t come up with one. She mentioned the reason for horses was because they are herd animals so of course I countered with dogs are pack animals.

I am of the belief that my horse does love me…if given a chance he would love to join me on the couch for a movie and popcorn. I have seen horses look/act depressed when their owner has died or when they are sold.

What really defines “love” anyway? Can horses “love” a human? What about other species?

[halt]

that’s a good question.

i think in the simplest sense, they can come to enjoy our company. i know they have preferences. some horses would rather be with their own, others do anything they can to get human attention… and i do think some horses really look out and want to be with their people.

is that what love is?

[Jarpur]

Mine trust me. They’re perfectly willing to leave what they’re doing (grazing, eating hay) and come on over when they see me to see “what’s up” and hang for a bit.

[HenryisBlaisin]

I don’t know that horses can conceptualize “love” but I do know how they react to certain people. My horse likes people, but he’s definitely MY horse. People comment on it all the time. We have a retired boarder whose owner doesn’t come out more than a couple times a week. This horse can be standoffish, not affectionate with many people. When she comes, he RUNS to her with little nickers and neighs and buries his head against her. He might not know what it is, but sure looks like love to me…

[NoSuchPerson]

The fact that your coworker thinks cats are capable of loving anyone but themselves pretty much destroys her credibility. :lol:

I don’t know if horses are capable of the emotion that we humans define as love, but they can certainly become attached to their people. My mule absolutely considers me to be HIS person. People who spend any amount of time around us will always, sooner or later, comment on it. I have no idea if this is a reflection of love/affection or simply that he considers me to be part of his herd, but the end result is the same, so I don’t worry about the distinction.

[Miss_Motivation]

Great question!

I think that love, to a horse, is very different than love, to a human.

Trust, fondness, affection, reliance, comfort, safety: all are things that some horses strongly associate with certain humans in their orbit in my experience.

But exclusivity, emotional sustenance, desire, limerance- feelings that are not related to food or safety or any kind of herd security- are not something I’ve seen strongly demonstrated by horses towards humans.

The interaction between humans and animals varies by species and individuals of course, but I don’t think there’s direct emotional reciprocity with horses and their people.

I have seen some very developed relationships between horses and handlers but it seems like a horse simply has a different emotional toolbox to work with.

And I have absolutely seen a number of horses that were loved- idolized, catered to, no comfort undelivered, no expense spared, no apparent need unmet- who were shockingly indifferent, even dismissive, of their owner’s affections, which caused the owners great anguish.

In my years, it seems that the horses are generally more reasonable about modest expectations from humans than humans are from their horses.

[tinah]

My mare will leave her grain to come share my space if we haven’t spent much time together. My gelding had to be held by someone else at a rodeo, and when I appeared out of the crowd again called to me.

you can call it whatever you want.

[KBC]

I own a red mare, she tolerates me…2 years of ownership and she is thawing slightly…

[NC001]

im new to horses but have had a lifetime of dogs and cats. Dogs are pack animals and see us as part/head of their pack and therefore seem to adore us. Also they dont necessarily have other dogs around or only 1-2 and we are their sole source of food & affection. Cats are similar- depend on us for everything if they are indoor only. As a kid our outdoor cats were definately more indifferent to us (though the barn kittens I helped raise seem pretty attached to me over other people).

Horses seem to me (my limited experience) more about the herd than the humans. It may depend on the living situations- we are at a medium sized barn with lots of turn out. The horse my daughter has been half leasing for over a year doesnt seem to prefer her or me much other than she knows we will make sure she has fresh water, hay and plenty of treats. but I see her face light up when her real owner (who never rides her) walks into the arena. he spent a lot of time with her when she was very young. she does seem to prefer my daughter to others under saddle though.

[ohmylivia]

Like everyone else, I think it depends on how you define love My gelding certainly seems happy to see me, offers to scratch my back when I scratch his, and is quite affectionate. He’s a pretty happy dude in general so he’s friendly to just about anyone, but he is a bit more playful and engaged with me. Whatever that means, I absolutely love it and love being around him!

[Cat_Tap]

My horses don’t “love” me. I am their caretaker and they demand my service. They are impatient waiting for their morning feed, demand to come in when it is crappy out, take their time coming when it is nice. I don’t think they care who looks after them as long as they are catered to.

I did have one OTTB that other people were afraid to ride but he was a lamb when I was on his back. I don’t think love was the reason he was so well behaved for me. We had a bond, I trusted him and rode him just by staying in balance with him rather than using noticeable aids. I took him to many different places, jumped all kinds of obstacles, was passed by a huge combine on the road and he just kept on trucking. I loved that horse.

[retiredhorse]

My horse certainly recognizes me/bag of carrots even when I don’t see him much. I used to see him almost daily, until he retired and I had to find a place where he could live outside that I could also afford. It’s farther away than ideal, but he’s doing well there. When he sees me now he nickers at me, which he didn’t used to do when he saw me every day. I find it touching, but I don’t know if recognition (or old age?) is the same as love. He also recognizes other horses he knew from before, but I don’t know if that is love either, especially when they can’t even be turned out together.

He loves being groomed and getting treats, and will follow me around without a halter or lead rope (though I don’t know how much of that is affection vs being trained to follow people around). But even if he could follow me home, I think he would greatly prefer to be out with his pasture-mates. He’s far more attached to them than to me; he’s not herd bound, but I don’t think he would think the company of a person is the same as other horses.

[sascha]

Your coworker needs to meet my horse to start, and then visit a large feral/semi-feral colony of barn cats.

1. My horse ADORES humans

2. Given the right atmosphere, cats are practically as much herd animals as horses. In fact, given that they will not just watch over each other’s kids, but nurse them, and have trusted babysitters for them, well, yeah, a lot of folks have some serious misconceptions about how cats work

3. Meh, what’s love anyway? It’s some bizarre emotional equation that comes down to us getting something/s we want.

[ChestnutArabianMare]

My redheaded mare is very picky about people and who she lets catch her. But when I yell her name, she comes walking over to the gate 95% of the time. The BO who feeds her (she’s outside 24/7) needs grain to catch her (she’s ruled by her stomach, LOL). That requires some level of affection, I think, so it’s sort of flattering! She definitely prefers some people to others and I seem to be one of her favored few.

[digihorse]

Yes. Why do humans have to make this question hard. Do you love your horse? Do you love your horse the same way you love your spouse? No? Ah… different kinds of love. Hmm… So… what makes it so hard for the “dominant” supposedly smarter species to believe another species can not feel an emotion akin to what we call “love” Pure human stupid thinking. And why would a smart creature care for another creature who treated it as a tool, rather than a living creature with needs, emotions, fears, etc. They don’t care. They treat as they are treated and as they are raised.

[RMJacobs]

My pony certainly seems fond of me. My last BO told me he moped when I was away for a long time, even though he liked her well enough and she paid a lot of attention to him. He had two horse friends and was happy with his situation in general, but still, she could tell a difference in his behavior when I was on a long trip.

He’s started tearing in from the back of the pasture when he sees me where he’s currently boarded, usually with a very loud yell. I interpret this yell as “Mom’s here! Mom’s here!” but who knows. I could be just imagining it. He looks very contented and stays right with me while I’m in his pasture, even though I take his halter off as soon as I’m done grooming him.

I was never his primary caretaker, so he doesn’t associate me with food. My husband was when we had the horses at home, and the pony has been boarded now with full care for two years. I haven’t fed him treats since he has been boarded.

Is that love? I don’t know. I can’t even define human love.

Rebecca

[Scribbler]

I watch how horses interact with other horses that they are fond of. Mares with foals, turnout buddies, mares with their favorite gelding of the month. There is intense focus, ears up and smiling (or not, there is can also be disagreement), little nickers, cuddling and grooming, trust in each others presence, rowdy play. Some of that I don’t want, but I feel that my mare demonstrates a range of behavior towards humans that is consonant with her range of behavior towards horses that she is affectionate about.

Partly the problem is that we spend less nonwork time with horses than we do with cats and dogs, and have fewer ways of being together. Trick training and ground work have given my mare the realization that humans are capable of simple communication and this interests her a lot. Yes, she’s in it for the treats, but she also seems so happy to be getting the attention and training humans to do simple actions.

The first part of the question is really, do horses love each other? Or if that isn’t the right word, what is the right word for the bonds they develop? I think they can have similar feelings about humans, and can express them if given the circumstances.

But honestly I don’t want a horse that loves me like a dog. Dogs make me feel so guilty because I can enver be enough for a dog. They are so needy. I like that I can put my mare on pasture for a month and she is totally fulfilled by the herd. Well,maybe a dog would be too if he got to spend a month in a pack!

[Hulk]

We live in the flood plain so we get flash floods. Some times the horse herd gets in an area of high ground. They will come to me if I call no matter what. People are amazed to watch them swim to me. But they listen when mother calls because they trust and know I will lead them to safety. That is trust. My stallion coming up to me while I am sitting in the field, and laying down next to me and putting his head in my lap is love. My gelding protecting me from being savaged by an aggressive mare, that is love. You can believe whatever you want, but I see no reason to doubt complex emotions in animals.

[Bluey]

@Hulk

We live in the flood plain so we get flash floods. Some times the horse herd gets in an area of high ground. They will come to me if I call no matter what. People are amazed to watch them swim to me. But they listen when mother calls because they trust and know I will lead them to safety. That is trust. My stallion coming up to me while I am sitting in the field, and laying down next to me and putting his head in my lap is love. My gelding protecting me from being savaged by an aggressive mare, that is love. You can believe whatever you want, but I see no reason to doubt complex emotions in animals.

My old gelding turning his fat behind to deflect the scary-cat younster that was losing his cool and almost running me over?

Could be guarding resources, the food giver, or a funny two legged herd member, or you may call it horse love, who knows.

[hank]

@HenryisBlaisin'

I don’t know that horses can conceptualize “love” but I do know how they react to certain people. My horse likes people, but he’s definitely MY horse. People comment on it all the time. We have a retired boarder whose owner doesn’t come out more than a couple times a week. This horse can be standoffish, not affectionate with many people. When she comes, he RUNS to her with little nickers and neighs and buries his head against her. He might not know what it is, but sure looks like love to me…

Saw the same exact situation at a boarding barn where I worked. I n spite of the owner NEVER feeding the horse, treats or anything else, he would always stop whatever he was doing and nicker to her and watch her for as long as she stayed. A completely unsentimental 32years old ottb, who was hard to catch for literally everyone else.