Once you learn how to relax and then tighten them, you’ll be able to stop using them when no longer needed. As in, when dressage is what you’re doing, you’ll be able to find that feel again and let go. The problem often is that we jump before we ever learn to sit deep, and then we lean on those muscles for balance. When you do learn to sit deep you’ll always be able to go back and find that feel. 
Coolio, sounds fun :). I can agree on the jumping part, this whole “DON’T LET YOUR BUTT LEAVE THE SADDLE!!” thing is still quite strange. :winkgrin: My life’s so hard…
Are your hip flexors to tight?
You may have to think of rocking back as your horse canters. Especially if you do much jumping you probably tend to lean forward
I can guarantee that there is no muscles/tendons/ligaments that are too tight… unless you mean that I am tensing you which is possible. How do I tell if they’re too tight? ANd what do you mean by rocking back?
I think of it more like allowing the rocking motion to happen under me, while staying steady in my core.
My instructor sometimes had me think of “hanging” from my shoulders to keep my upper body quiet. Also make sure to look up! (I’m sure you do if you are transitioning from hunterland)
Looking up is one thing I can do right :lol:.
[QUOTE=grandprixer;8874756]
And he is certainly hot :). Getting behind the motion is thankfully not a problem, it’s usually sitting up straight enough (former hunter rider). So are you saying I shouldn’t relax my legs/drape them?[/QUOTE]
Nooo, I don’t think that’s what I said. You can relax your legs and stretch them down, but don’t go completely loose and floppy all the time.
“Pony has a huge canter, and I ride in a relatively flat saddle, so when I relax and sit I bounce and slide everywhere, no matter how loose I am. It’s not pretty. Does it just take practice?”
The above is probably partially a balance and strength issue, but it’s not ONLY a balance and strength issue. You’re not riding a deadbroke western pleasure horse at a lope. A hot horse with a big canter needs support and rebalancing, and only following him along in his current canter is not going to improve his canter, and therefore your canter seat, beyond a certain point.
It’s like trying to sit the trot on a horse that is hollow and too quick- you can try bouncing along with it, or you can learn to fix the trot as you are riding it and you’ll find that a good trot is much easier to sit than a crappy one. I find a crappy canter no easier to sit than a crappy trot.
I don’t know if this will help you, but IMO this video does a pretty good job of illustrating the type of movement you want in your pelvis- the backwards circles. I wasn’t taught exactly this way and also had a lot of lunge lessons which helped a lot.
https://youtu.be/Fbbm_U9MdPc
[QUOTE=RedHorses;8874012]
I found riding bareback very helpful.[/QUOTE]
Agreed, though just ditching the stirrups does wonders for me when it’s not clicking. (…on what sounds like a similar horse, too.)
As long as my horse isn’t too “up” when I get on, I like to walk around without stirrups for several minutes and stretch my legs back and down, and really find my seatbone connection to the saddle, and think of growing up straight out of the saddle. This can help with finding your balance in all gaits, and you can stop and drop your stirrups and do it at any time during your ride to re-establish the feel whenever you need to. Also, make sure the balance of your saddle isn’t working against you. I just say that because many saddles that are flat and slick tend to also be older types that might not balance correctly due to packed down flocking, etc.
[QUOTE=amb;8875946]
Agreed, though just ditching the stirrups does wonders for me when it’s not clicking. (…on what sounds like a similar horse, too.)[/QUOTE]
That’s what I ended up doing last time. I just dropped them and stretched my legs as far as they could go and worked to keep that feeling. It certainly helped a little, but again more practice would probably be useful.
[QUOTE=outerbanks77;8876175]
As long as my horse isn’t too “up” when I get on, I like to walk around without stirrups for several minutes and stretch my legs back and down, and really find my seatbone connection to the saddle, and think of growing up straight out of the saddle. This can help with finding your balance in all gaits, and you can stop and drop your stirrups and do it at any time during your ride to re-establish the feel whenever you need to. Also, make sure the balance of your saddle isn’t working against you. I just say that because many saddles that are flat and slick tend to also be older types that might not balance correctly due to packed down flocking, etc.[/QUOTE]
The saddle’s balance is thankfully fine, the slickness is a result of improper care rather than age and it’s flat because that’s how I prefer it when jumping. It’s certainly not a new saddle, but it’s not old either.
I find what helps is to warm up at the walk, take your feet out of the stirrups, and move your legs around (like you were pulling your leg behind you to do a hamstring stretch, or scissoring your legs). This helps get the feeling of you butt “in the saddle.” Remember this feeling of your seat bones being connected and think about that when you get to canter.
I spent many hours bareback on a halflinger that was like a couch when I was still in school. It did wonders.
I also try and ride the canter without stirrups and let my legs go limp for a bit. The best visual I was taught was to have my legs like a wet towel around the horse. This is far easier in a dressage saddle or without stirrups. If you are riding in a jump saddle it can be a little more difficult. It also helps to try and breathe out your stomach. Not sure how to explain that one other than it helps to center you into the saddle. Take deep breaths and as you breathe out think about the breath exiting your stomach. It almost feels like it lowers your center of gravity. You can try and practice that just sitting in class to try and get the feel of it. Almost like a little yoga moment.
I hope this helps and good luck
Thank you, you guys are the best :). I rode again last night (word to the wise-don’t give your horse three days off and then work with no stirrups :D) and it was better again.
Only issue is now I’m having trouble with my left hip, when I stretch my leg down it feels like someone put a rusty knife through it. I think I might hold off on more of these exercises until my trainer gets back and can help see if I’m doing something wrong. 
Could be that you’re crooked, maybe forcing one side more open than the other. Definitely wait and get some other eyes on your riding to help you figure that out!
[QUOTE=Velvet;8878101]
Could be that you’re crooked, maybe forcing one side more open than the other. Definitely wait and get some other eyes on your riding to help you figure that out![/QUOTE]
I hope that’s the issue… That can be fixed.
Velvet, this is the best advise I have heard since I started my Dressage Lessons 70 years ago un Germany. It has always worked, even with my pupils and Pony Clubs.
Thanks. Now I hope that I finally have learned how to post here!!!
Thanks, ulan! (I just went back and cleaned up some typos in case anyone else wants the advice. I figured I’d make it easier to understand without the autocorrect typos. :lol: )
[QUOTE=grandprixer;8878026]
Only issue is now I’m having trouble with my left hip, when I stretch my leg down it feels like someone put a rusty knife through it. I think I might hold off on more of these exercises until my trainer gets back and can help see if I’m doing something wrong. [/QUOTE]
Or you could be like me - I was born with a 1/2" shorter left leg. No big deal, until I stopped wearing heel lifts on the short side (college…grad school… those lifts are expensive). And then I got serious about dressage and started really sitting the trot and oh, the pain! Went to a massage therapist, who told me I had the hips of a 65 year old woman (I was 38!), and helped me get everything stretched out and working again. And yes, all my left shoes are outfitted with heel lifts once again.
So if it turns out you aren’t actually sitting crooked - consult with a good massage or physical therapist.
[QUOTE=Sunsets;8889544]
Or you could be like me - I was born with a 1/2" shorter left leg. No big deal, until I stopped wearing heel lifts on the short side (college…grad school… those lifts are expensive). And then I got serious about dressage and started really sitting the trot and oh, the pain! Went to a massage therapist, who told me I had the hips of a 65 year old woman (I was 38!), and helped me get everything stretched out and working again. And yes, all my left shoes are outfitted with heel lifts once again.
So if it turns out you aren’t actually sitting crooked - consult with a good massage or physical therapist.[/QUOTE]
I can definitely tell you that one leg is longer than the other. Like 1-1.5" longer. And I do have bad hips… Although I did put my hand on my hip while it was hurting and dicovered that it was subluxed. That would explain why it hurt so much… oh, the joys of hypermobility :rolleyes:.
