George Morris on the SS list

And I’m telling you that is false. The child doesn’t have the words to articulate the attraction nor do they link it to sexual attraction until later. Doesn’t change the fact that their crushes are the same gender.

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I was looking at your comment in direct reference to what you quoted. I also didn’t take you or anyone else saying it’s unfortunate as not having faith in the process. I took those comments to mean “it’s unfortunate there was not enough evidence to up hold the lifetime ban for this particular case.”

Thank you for clarifying.

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I feel like I need a shower after reading Duncan MacIntosh’s comments.

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Well, I’ve well and truly been told off! A thousand apologies, none of them sincere. 

 Are you saying a prepubescent child of 7 or 9 feels and experiences sexual attraction (to anyone)?  I’m not asking whether they can articulate it or not.

Yes, some people absolutely know their sexual orientation at a very early age. Whether they experience that as sexual attraction, I can’t say. I had a dear childhood friend who knew he was gay (anyone who was paying attention also knew he was gay) by ~ 5. We were both ~ 10 and he was sleeping over at our house and my mother wouldn’t let him sleep in my room, and insisted he sleep in my brother’s because coed sleepovers were not the done thing. I protested, in my very limited 10 year old vocabulary, that this was different, and it was okay for him to sleep in my room, because it was Billy.

My mother understood and pretended she didn’t.

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You literally quoted me saying a child 7-9 has crushes but doesn’t associate them to sexual attraction so… I crushed on males and am straight. Friends and family crushes on same sex. Gay. No one, not I or anyone else associated that attraction with sex.

@RainWeasley posted about it better than I.

Not sure why you’re so angry. Kids get crushes on one sex or the other and often that foreshadows their sexuality.

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I was the one who said it was unfortunate that the ban was not upheld, then realized that I had no business saying that, since I didn’t know all, or any, of the evidence which was the basis of the arbitrator’s decision. Also realized that second guessing the arbitrator is the type of thing I object to when DC, et al do it.

    I don’t know the evidence, don’t think “transparency” is called for, and think SS is best supported by respecting the arbitrator’s decision. 

   So mostly criticizing myself.
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Again I took the post I commented on in isolation.

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For all of us girls who were tomboys as children, were you and your mother assuming we were lesbians because we weren’t into stereotypical girly things?

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Nope. My Mom in hindsight knew she was a lesbian at a young age. My parents never defined my sexuality based on me being a tomboy. People, even gay people, think I’m a lesbian because of how I look. Stereotypes suck.

Quit stereotyping people.

ETA: My gay mother lamented that I wouldn’t dress like a girl in high school. That has changed and she’s happy I’ve embraced fully being a woman. Her concern was not my sexuality but rather hating my gender. This also was not a question of me being transgender. It was my mother wanting me to be comfortable in my own skin and not dressing like a male to be accepted by males.

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My confusion is that I thought “sexual orientation” is DEFINED as “feeling sexual attraction” to the same or the other gender. Unless you have another definition, how can one know their “sexual orientation” (regardless of the ability to articulate it) prior to having feelings of sexual attraction?

@YankeeDuchess,

Show me in my previous post where I said that my friend wasn’t into stereotypical boy things? I think you’re making a lot of assumptions that simply don’t hold up. Being a tomboy doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with sexual orientation and can have a lot to do with sexism in society, greater freedoms and privileges being available to boys and the restrictive roles for girls. My mother (and most parents at the time) wouldn’t have had a problem with two boys or two girls sharing a room, regardless of how gender normative their behavior, because the social expectation was that those weren’t potentially sexual relationships.

This weird tangent started because you didn’t believe a prepubescent child was capable of sexual attraction.

I disagree. As does @TheMoo As does Freud. It may not be the same as what a teen or adult experiences as sexual attraction, but it’s there.

Still doesn’t make those disgusting statements by Duncan McIntosh ok; and still doesn’t mean a child is capable of consent. Consent has to do with the maturity of their judgment; not their genitals.

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@newtopicnewalter thank you for saying it better!

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Ditto. I grew up during the era of “go natural” so I have never really worn makeup. I also spent most of my time in my younger years dressed like a barn-dwelling ragamuffin. I’ve worked in mostly male-dominated workplaces and doing jobs where jewelry and dresses just weren’t practical. I’ve been divorced since the late 80’s and have never remarried nor had any long-term SO since then. Plus, I’m a very private person and mostly keep my personal business to myself.

Everybody “knows” that I’m a lesbian. Except I’m not. Not even slightly inclined in that direction.

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     I’m literally not understanding what you are saying. Is the argument this;
     1) A prepubescent 7 or 9 year is non sexual, so does not have feelings of sexual attraction. 
     2) Nevertheless, young prepubescent children have completely non-sexual “crushes” on other children. 
     3) If these prepubescent crushes are same sex, that establishes that when puberty hits, the adolescent is gay. 
     4) The child and the world can rely on the gender of “crushes” of 9 year old to “know”  the child will have same gender sexual attraction at sexual maturity. 

 Is that what you are saying?
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[ATTACH=JSON]{“alt”:“Click image for larger version Name: children-toys.jpg Views: 1 Size: 14.6 KB ID: 10537133”,“data-align”:“none”,“data-attachmentid”:“10537133”,“data-size”:“medium”}[/ATTACH] one of my favourite memes from recent years. should apply to clothes, colors, make up, hobbies, etc. But it’s not an easy or immediate awakening.

children-toys.jpg

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You said everyone knew since he was 5 that he was gay. Personally, I would not pronounce any 5 year boy as gay, but on what basis did everyone “know” he was gay?

“Prepubescent” means prior to the start of the the sexual maturation process, so yes, I think that BY DEFINITION prepubescent children do not feel sexual attraction.

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@ladyj79 I love that!!!
@YankeeDuchess why does any of this matter as it pertains to safe sport?

On first glance I get mistaken for a male.

They don’t but they have crushes. Who they crush on often is a precursor to sexuality.

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