This helps me as well. Not only do I lock my elbows, but I have short t-rex arms and an old, bad habit of giving releases with my body instead of my arms. My horse is also very good at taking advantage of that fact and sneakily pulling my seat forward out of the tack. Core strength and general awareness have helped stop all of the above, but I still catch it happening when I’m focused on some other aspect.
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I did two things to help with this:
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Take lessons on a G.P. schoolmaster…if I lean forward I get something totally different than what I think I’m asking for.
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Workout in the gym like Guenter Seidel
Send me a PM and I can offer some workout suggestions on things to do for balance if (1) isn’t an option.
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The two things that helped me most were 1) a longe lesson where I got told to put my butt in the saddle and keep it there! and 2) cantering bareback while actively pointing my toes at the ground. Pointing toes down uses the opposing muscles to those that allow gripping the horse. Thus pointing toes demands the rider balance themselves in the canter, which in turn demands a nice, tall body position. You’re going to slip if you don’t! 
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Oh I do that too! I have long arms, however it’s pretty hard to release when your elbows are already straight from holding your hands out in front (in hunters), so it seems I developed a way of giving with my shoulders. The worst part about that habit is I can’t even tell I’m doing it. My horse isn’t even sneaky about that one - he just says oh great! I don’t have to carry myself any more so I’ll just relax and put my weight on my forehand, thanks!
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stirrup-less work is invaluable. Leaning forward is almost always a sign of pinching knees, I literally take my entire leg off the horse if I find myself leaning ANY direction to ensure perfect balance.
Also, riding with something like a stress ball under your bum to ensure you don’t pitch your seat out of the saddle.
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Pointing toes down is a huge no-no. You can still grip with your leg to cheat, and it’s literally pulling you forward. Don’t believe me? Stand on your tip toes and see how long you last before you pitch forward.
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@Dressage_Strider - that is the point! Pointing your toes actively to the ground will very quickly highlight any tendency to lean or grip with the legs. This gives the rider immediate feedback they can’t ignore without sliding off. Which allows the rider to find the tall, dynamic, balanced seat that doesn’t rely on leg grip to stay with the horse.
Active is the key word in this exercise. Pointing toes actively is really pointing the entire leg from the pelvis. This active point opens the joints from hip to ankle, engaging the muscles that open the joints making it harder (but not impossible) to grip - though actually if you grip you do start to close both hip and knee joints. It is an exercise that teaches balance.
In the beginning I couldn’t point my toes for very many strides before I’d have to go toes up/heels down and recover my seat on the horse before going back to the active toe pointing. After a while I could ride the canter with a loose leg for miles because the balance was there.
It is a fantastic exercise for learning dynamic balance on horseback and can be done at the walk and trot as well. With the applicable to every exercise caveat that it must be done properly to get the benefit.
OP, does your saddle fit you?
Asking because i’m a strong/fit person but i couldn’t sit back to save my life in any gait or movement until i switched saddles, out of a tiny deep 17" into something with a big enough seat for my build and stirrup length. Now I’m pretty much Alois Podhajsky.
Thanks, everyone!
I do believe my position “problems” comes from wanting to have a defensive seat and from when I used to jump as a kid. I also used to pump with my arms but have thankfully broken that habit.
The idea of letting the hips lead seems so odd to me but after watching videos of other riders, it makes sense, and I definitely don’t do that. This is going to be a mental and physical change for me.
Bareback cantering on my shark-fin, narrow horse is not happening in this lifetime lol.
I’ll give cantering without stirrups a try on the longe line. That might at least give me more brain space to solely focus on my position and not where we are going.
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Can you explain the stress ball under the seat thing? I’ve seen videos of it on facebook but I can’t grasp the concept.
last night I was playing with this, imagining lifting her front end into the canter, made it much easier to get the image in my mind. If you are lifting in front, makes your bum sit back!
Even just visualizing the thought of sitting back makes me feel like I am going to fall backwards on my head ha.
Thats why I like the idea of tilting the pelvis up in front!
I AM the person who is asking my coach if I am sitting OK, and that is usually when I feel i’m Leaning back.
Loads of good ideas offered so far. I like to keep things simple. Count “1 o’clock, 2o’clock, 3 o’clock, 4, 1 o’clock, 2 o’clock…” etc etc as you canter, which makes you concentrate on something other than your position. At the same time, think of putting the back of your neck into the collar of your shirt. Try the collar thing even just sitting in a chair and feel how it changes your balance. That might help.
Oh, that makes sense now! I like that idea better too. Thanks!
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00JKOPM5A/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o05_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
here’s a link to the ones I use - they have done wonders for my seat, I use them in my warm-up consistently! I recommend using 2, one under each SEAT BONE to ensure you are sitting correctly.
You can also put them right above your knee, to keep your thigh on the horse
