Of course! You know I’m here if I can be helpful at all!
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Emmy, you have been through major life changes - a lot of them in a short period of time. Job loss and divorce are two biggies in a person’s life. Health issues another one. You are doing just fine. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other.
The training will be so helpful and that will help both of you find your groove. You look beautiful together. She entered your life for a reason so just keep going with it for now.
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This time of year is always awful for many horses and their people. If you have lurked on here, you probably read some cold weather related issues others are suffering. See if consistent warm weather doesn’t help.
You have already done a great deal for Honey, improved her diet, proper farrier work, vet work. If you decide to move her on (with disclosure) she is in far better shape and that will help her find a better home. Bet if you reach out to the ASB community you met last fall, you may find somebody to help you and her.
Welcome back and good luck.
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I’d do something more focused on FORWARD if rearing is the go to. Intersperse the groundwork in there as a walk break. But move OUT would be my focus for pre-ride prep
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Yeah, OP, it’s all FORWARD. They can’t go up on their back end unless they are standing with their feet under them, keep feet moving forward to block the rear. Keep them doing something, anything forward.
On the bending thing, eh…if she wants to try to go up when you bend, skip bending. For now. She doesn’t absolutely need to master it right now. Just do something else, keep going but do something else. Preferably not in a small circle, gooooo. Know 9 months seems long but she has had YEARS of sketchy or no handling to erase and reprogram.
Think it’s an excellent choice to have a Pro work with her and remember, everything you do for her increases her chance of a better home should you decide to move on. It also lets you interact more with your horse community to move her along and help you find another should you make that choice.
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Agreed with skipping bending for right now. My legs go on = FORWARD and I cluck = FORWARD are the only two buttons I’d worry about right now. Big marching walks, trots with gentle figures. I wouldn’t even bother asking for bend at a walk right now - ask for a gentle bend at the trot, boom got it, go forward again, now the other way, etc. Keep it fast paced, brief asks with “good enough” often being the answer. Don’t give her a chance to prop and rear.
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Thirding (lol) forward in lieu of everything else. Even if it isn’t pretty or “correct”, she’s gotta GO FORWARD. It doesn’t have to be fast or a scoot, but she can’t be thinking backwards. This is especially true in your groundwork - personally I would not be backing this horse up as a correction, ever, common as it is in some schools of thought. I also would be very careful not to pull her backwards on the lines or in side reins, she needs to know there’s an open door in front of her.
Signed, a person with a horse whose first choice is to go back and then get light in front. He isn’t allowed to even THINK about backwards, and I’ve worked very hard to install a go button. This has meant that we cannot follow some tried and true training methods, and I do warn people that he has the habit.
OP this habit is likely not your fault. But it IS something you’ll have to learn to deal with, whether you’re the one training her or you have someone else do it. And you can decide that it is or is not something you’d like to handle.
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JME but mares tend to get a…little light…in front more often than geldings. Some less experienced riders can over react to that feeling the horse is getting light and pull BACK or in a tight circle rather then send horse forward, pulling back helps the horse get its back feet underneath so it can rear. Exactly the opposite of what rider was trying to do.
Bucking is the same, they can’t get their feet under them to get a hard buck if rider sends them forward yet many riders react by pulling back or into a small circle letting them set up to uncork a big one. Keep going and they might bounce around or “porpoise” but they can’t get enough power into it to unseat any halfway decent rider and quickly lose interest in wasting energy trying it.
There is no secret to dealing with these things but the rider cant be afraid to direct all energy forward and there needs to be room to go forward, why I don’t care for doing this in a round pen or real tiny ring. Can’t get going enough to keep those feet busy taking big steps. Thats why the traditional way to break ranch horses was/is out of a ring with someplace to go.
It’s no knock on OP, quite a common reaction even in more experienced riders and why the Pro is good idea here. If nothing else, to determine if this is a real nasty habit or more of a nuisance that can be redirected.
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Thanks all!
Just to address a few things:
Someone had asked if the pro knows about the rearing. Yes! Absolutely, that was disclosed. Also she’s been in training with this trainer since December I think? We are just upping the training sessions.
I for sure would tense up or pull back or have some sort of reaction if she feels like she might surge forward or something. I’m trying to work on not being so reactionary. But the trainer is very calm and patient. Neither of us is asking for contact or a frame at this time.
If I move on from her, I also thought it would be beneficial to see if any of you are interested/know of a good home for her. I think she needs more experienced hands.
But I’ll keep you all posted! Thanks for the support and warm welcome. Sorry if I missed some of the talking points here.
I know my trainer has a reason for trying to get a bend, but I can’t think of it or how to word it right now and would rather not put my foot in my mouth lol. But yes, I do carrot stretches with her when I remember 
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Trainer can bend her if she wants to but when you ride her, skip it if it makes you anxious. I would.
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Yep. And get a neck strap or grab a chunk of that pretty mane so if she DOES surge forward, you dont catch her in the mouth.
Forward is forward. For right now you can’t get picky. And yeah, I’d lunge her at a brisk trot for 10-15 minutes before swinging a leg over.
You’re doing everything right by her. But - the honeymoon phase is over and now you guys have to find a way to communicate.
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I have an Oh Crap strap! Lol
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Put a hand on it and let her lurch forward, and then… through gritted teeth… tell her what a GOOD GIRL she is for going forward (albeit in a not so wonderful way) when you asked!!
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lol emphasis on “through gritted teeth”
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You can tell her how you really feel, just keep your voice happy. 
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I’m really glad you’re treating for ulcers, you might not need your oh crap strap quite as much if that works for her! I still think of her often and still love to hear the updates. You two are both cute! I hope things settle down for both of you and you can have a good summer!
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I think you’re super brave to come back. You’ve had a lot of loss and changes. Physically I think she looks great and has def put on weight!
I’ve said this in so many posts but winter horse is not the same as summer horse. You’re taking the right approach with upping her training sessions. It would be worth keeping a journal and seeing where you’re at in maybe 2 months?
With that in mind horses should be fun they’re way too expensive not to enjoy it. So if it’s not the right match don’t beat yourself up you’ve gotten her in a much better position to find a better fit.
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I did not follow the previous thread, so maybe someone already suggested this.
My vet recommended a supplement with amino acids to help build the muscle and top line on an older horse. I believe it’s called Purina Super Sport. It really made a noticeable difference once that horse had been on it for a couple of weeks.
Good luck!
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Thank you so much 
