Honey the ASB 2.0

[AdultEmmy]

I really hope this doesn’t re-open a can of worms…

Let’s see, where were we? Since September, I’ve initiated a divorce, dealt with honey issues from previous thread, moved barns, moved, my dog died, I was in a hit and run, I got laid off…. Woo!

Anyway. The dust is settling so I figured I’d come back with an update and also seeking some advice.

Honey did well over the winter. She started in a 1x a week program with the trainer/owner of the barn this winter and it was almost entirely ground work. In February we introduced ground driving, which is now a regular part of her workout.

The vet has given her a body condition score of 4.5. We still need some muscle, but otherwise I’m quite happy. She’s been seeing the chiropractor and getting massages. Her teeth were done last week, she saw the saddle fitter today and the fitter palpated and had no signs of sensitivity and said my saddle fits well. And I’m starting her on ulcer meds next week.

You may be asking—why emily? Well, that rearing issue has persisted. It SEEMS to be behavioral. Especially when asked to bend. That’s another reason we are doing so much ground driving, to work on bend. But we feel we’ve ruled out all kinds of pain issues, I’ve had X-rays, etc. she literally grunts and may try to pop up. She also just seems tightly wound and constantly ready to just explode. So, we’re going to do a round of treatment for ulcers. If that doesn’t help, I got a magnesium supplement for her. But we will hold on that until she’s gone through the 30 days of ulcer treatment.

She’s definitely found her personality, and I’ll be honest—it’s hard for me. April 1 she goes into a 3x/week training with my trainer/barn owner whose career has been in starting babies and breaking out mustangs. So I do feel like honey is in the best hands. So 3x with her and 1 lesson a week with me. Then probably a hack or two with me.

I had a communicator talk to her in February. Honey says nothing hurts, and she is happy. But I’m really struggling with her. I knew this would be slow, but in almost 9 months together, we now sometimes mount nicely, can sometimes walk calmly and may get a few paces of trot. I’m feeling defeated and questioning whether or not I have the emotional bandwidth to deal with such a big project. I think there’s a fantastic horse in there. But maybe not for my skill set or emotional needs right now. So April
will be very telling.

Okay, I guess that’s it. I’m just having a hard time and feeling terrible about it.

But anyway, here’s the queen through the winter

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[quietann]

She is still a beautiful horse, and looks to be in better shape than she was the last time you posted.

I’m sad to hear she still has issues, whether behavioral or physical. I recall you abd/or a trainer doing more riding with her before… Could this be a case of an undernourished horse gaining enough weight and energy yo show it’s “true colors?”

[AdultEmmy]

Absolutely, it could be. And that’s kind of what we are thinking it is. But for me I have to decide if I’m up for that.

I think someone in a better state of mind, or with more experience, would do splendid with her.

[Sdel]

@AdultEmmy

You may be asking—why emily? Well, that rearing issue has persisted. It SEEMS to be behavioral. Especially when asked to bend. That’s another reason we are doing so much ground driving, to work on bend. But we feel we’ve ruled out all kinds of pain issues, I’ve had X-rays, etc. she literally grunts and may try to pop up.

What have you xrayed? How have you ruled out pain?

FYI: my horse with neck issues grunts and will rear, especially with asking for bend, and is always ready to explode. He’s also always ulcery.

[trubandloki]

@AdultEmmy

I’m feeling defeated and questioning whether or not I have the emotional bandwidth to deal with such a big project.

It is never wrong to realize that you and a horse might not be a good match. No matter how much you want it to be, sometimes it just not right. No fault of you (the human), no fault of the horse.

This does not make you a bad horse person, a bad rider, a bad anything. It also does not make the horse a bad anything. Sometimes some people and some horses are not the right fit.

I am sorry about your rough winter! That is a lot of stress. I am glad you are trying and having a trainer try with honey. But please, do not feel like a failure.

Jingles for both you and Honey!

[fivestrideline]

@trubandloki

It is never wrong to realize that you and a horse might not be a good match. No matter how much you want it to be, sometimes it just not right. No fault of you (the human), no fault of the horse.

This does not make you a bad horse person, a bad rider, a bad anything. It also does not make the horse a bad anything. Sometimes some people and some horses are not the right fit.

I came here to say exactly this. Horses are individuals, just like people, and sometimes they don’t mesh!

OP, remember that horses are supposed to be fun, at least the majority of the time. Sounds like Honey has found her personality, and it’s not exactly enjoyable for you (though perhaps not unusual for an ASB). That’s totally okay, and it’s SO common for horses to settle in and then change a bit, even more common for an underweight horse to turn out to be spicy. You get to decide if that’s helping or hurting your peace, and there is nothing wrong with changing gears, changing horses, or just taking a break.

If ulcers are there, they can certainly be a cause for her discomfort and flightiness, as well as the slow progress with her weight. She DOES look better than the last time we saw her, which is good. I have experienced ulcery horses that just couldn’t gain weight despite a light workload, unlimited forage and pumping over 30,000kcals into them. Treated the ulcers and suddenly we had shiny, healthy horses that needed to go on a diet!

Lastly, I’ll emphasize that rearing is THE most dangerous skill a horse can have in their pocket. There are people out there who can school a horse that gets light in front before it becomes a confirmed rearing habit, but they are very uniquely skilled. It is SO easy for a person to accidentally turn a little rear into a full on flip; yes, even a professional who handles youngsters and greenies. Additionally, you really don’t know much about Honey’s past - rearing could already be her default evasion. Please proceed with caution and assume that this is something she KNOWS how to do rather than being a new, unconfirmed habit.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do - but above all be safe and take care of yourself!

[Alterration]

I am so sorry that you’re dealing with so much but so glad to see you and Honey

It is not entirely abnormal for a saddlebred’s evasion to be a rear. This does not mean that you have to ride that - only that they tend to get light in front where another horse would buck or shut down.

Saddlebreds are also very sensitive to emotions - I don’t ride mine when I’m upset. He knows. It has taken me a number of years to fully understand. The more emotional I am, the more he fusses, nips and behaves poorly. All horses are this way but saddlebreds are extra in tune with their people. He is often aware of my emotions before I am. Yay.

All this to say - she is probably feeling better than she had, and now you can figure out how to proceed. I wish I were closer so that I could help!

[endlessclimb]

Does she move off nicely if sent straight? Just bending causes the grunt/rear? Can she do her flexes or “carrot stretches” on the ground? Can you flex her side to side while at a whoa?

[SuzieQNutter]

I agree that rearing is the most dangerous vice a horse can have. If they flip you could be killed … or worse.

Please advise the trainer that she rears before taking her there. It would be a hard no from me and do not bring her.

[Angela_Freda]

@AdultEmmy

She also just seems tightly wound and constantly ready to just explode.

I like magnesium for creatures (incl myself) who have tight, sore muscles prone to cramping.
Looking at your pics I see a horse with no shoulder muscle. If course she’s not a QH, ie a breed one expects to have a bulky shoulder, but she is so narrow with almost none…
My right off the track TB looked like this when I got him. Three months later he had a nice shoulder, rump, etc. He had plumped in all the right places. So that’s where my thought process is coming from.

What is she eating now, if you can share what the weight of each element of her feed is as well, that’s most helpful for the members here helping you.
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[floppyammy]

@AdultEmmy I’m so sorry you are going through all this. You certainly have a lot on your plate. A LOT. It sounds like you are doing your very best for Honey and I commend you for that. You have been on a long journey with her. If you find that she is more of a project than your emotional, physical, mental and financial resources can expend, there is absolutely no harm in admitting that and finding her next person. Hugs.

[SummerRose]

Thanks for posting the update, @AdultEmmy!

I’m sorry things have been so rough for you lately, and that Honey may not turn out to be the right horse for you. And my condolences about the loss of your dog - that’s such a hard thing to go through, even without everything else.

But I’m glad to hear from you again. And Honey is genuinely looking much better - I even have a hard time finding ribs in the photo where she is wet, which is where it is most likely to show. Her topline is looking a lot better, too. She won’t (and probably shouldn’t) ever look like a fit warmblood, but she’s looking more like a healthy (if a little on the lean side) saddlebred.

Thanks for posting again! And regarding the critical posts… you’ve now officially been welcomed into the horse world. Three people = three or four (sometimes very strong) opinions. I think that all of the posters mean well, they just aren’t always kind in their deliveries.

[Alterration]

Oh and one other thing that I thought of this morning - my saddlebreds are very light mouthed. You mention that it’s a problem when bending. They generally prefer mouth touches as opposed to steady holds and very quick releases. You can eventually increase contact, but they start out expecting you to be “not in their faces” - too heavy a contact will provoke much drama, much more than say a QH or TB who actually wants the contact. They are a very different ride.

So if, for instance, I want a bit of bend to the inside, I have to ride them much more like an advanced horse. Close fingers for only a moment, and release almost before I notice the change. It’s very quick and light as opposed to what you might do with a “normal” green horse where you might hold the rein until they are comfortable or exaggerate the bend. With saddlebreds in general, the notion is be kind, get in, get out quickly for everything (shoeing and trimming often included).

I also find that they are often happier in a mullen mouth and more accepting of a light contact. The shires mullen D has been great on all of my sensitive critters.

Anyway - as everyone has mentioned, if you’re not having fun there is NO harm in saying she’s not the horse for you, but if you decide to persist some of us ASB folks can help

[2DogsFarm]

Welcome back & WHEW! your Winter threw a lot of curveballs

But Spring will get here & IIWM, I’d let the dust settle & then reassess where you are with Honey.
Honestly, IME, 9mos is still very much an Intro period with any horse, any breed.
I’ve had my companion Hackney Pony for 14yrs & only in the last couple has he become calm & cuddly (for him ).
He was a freebie from my shoer, an experienced horseman/Driver, who’d driven him, crashed twice & put him to pasture with anothe &r client.
I was told never to hitch him, but had him ground-driving reliably in a few months.
Bum knees (mine) put a stop to that if I’d intended to use him for anything but keeping my horse company, I might have sent him down the road.
If he was my only option for a Riding/Driving horse, same.
So:
Give yourself some time to decide.
ASB may not be the breed for you.
Honey may not be the horse you need.
But right now, I’d give the decision more time.

[Angela_Freda]

@2DogsFarm

Honestly, IME, 9mos is still very much an Intro period with any horse, any breed.

Especially when they’ve moved several times in that period and had a variety of handlers.

There’s a meme about dogs needing three days/weeks/months. I think it’s longer for many, and restarts every time something changes.
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[FjordBCRF]

Ill also add that a sensitive horse is going to pick up a lot of what its owner is putting out as well. I can only imagine how stressed @AdultEmmy has been during the entire time she’s owned Honey and I wouldn’t rule out that, to some level, that could be in play as well.

I tend to be a worrier and a little anxious and find that I do better with horses that have more steady temperaments

[endlessclimb]

And, are you getting on her “cold” or letting her burn off some steam first? Until a set communication pathway is there, there is nothing wrong with a little sweat to get that edge off so the over reactivity is at a minimum instead of max.

[AdultEmmy]

Oh 100%. If I even feel slightly overwhelmed or anything I pivot. If I am emotional or something I just stick to grazing and hanging out.

[AdultEmmy]

Usually she starts with either ground work, walking over poles in hand, or ground driving

[AdultEmmy]

Thank you! I think it must have been suggested to me in the other thread but she is in a happy mouth Mullen.