Horses at home and full time work - Am I crazy?

[callyhan]

Not really looking for advice, maybe just some commiseration.

I have 2.5 horses at home (2 full size, 1 mini) and signs are pointing to my mare having an injury that will limit her capabilities for the rest of her life. I also have a retired gelding and old mini. I am currently on the fence about buying a OTTB as another riding horse as this will be mini’s last summer.

Sometimes I tell people at work about all the animals I have at home and they look at me wide-eyed. Sometimes I think I am crazy for having the horses, the dogs, and the cats while working full time away from home. Partner also works full time away from home. We’ve had lots of vet calls this past year for some reason, minor health issues with horses, the cats somehow developed allergies, one dog always has pent up energy to expend. I am just tired of dealing with it all around work, calling in last minute to say I have an emergency vet appt. Waiting for farrier to show up all day and using a vacation day. Getting a call on the hottest day of the year that hay is being delivered and I need to be home to unload wagon and stack after working outside all day.

Anyways, not sure what the point is but felt like folks here would understand living this way!

P.S. Am I crazy for wanting another horse at home?

[wildlifer]

Nah, I don’t think you’re crazy. I have my horses at home, work full time, & travel often for work. From my perspective, you have it easier than me bc you have 2 incomes & the possibility of help when it’s needed, so I hope that makes you feel better.

[findeight]

This is not the place to come to be discouraged from keeping horses anywhere, we are sworn to enable such things and certainly will not call you crazy.

That said, perhaps not going for a project horse right away might be a good choice here.

It sounds like you are stretched thin to the point its having an effect on your job performance and possibly your relationship with partner might need some more together time. Both of you being away so much might be part of why the cats developed allergies and you are experiencing increased vet visits. Anxious pets often develop anxiety related issues….maybe they are trying to tell you something. Maybe you sharing your feelings of maybe trying to do too much on here is also trying to tell you something, listen to your gut.

Adding an animal now plus the upcoming final farewell will have an effect on your already stressed “herd dynamic”. Might be better to tap the brakes.

Just a thought.

[clanter]

we put programmable combination locks on the perimeter gates, if needed we could give out the access code for the locks… never needed, but daughter set the combination to her birth month and day so that would not forget her birthday, once again

[StormyDay]

I understand. I work from home which gives me more freedom, but it’s still tough when you really need to be doing something else but can’t because the farrier/vet/hay/etc is happening.

My only suggestion is to make sure that everything is a fool proof as possible, and then tell those people: nope, I can’t be home. But that’s ok because;
The farrier is prepaid and all the horses are waiting in the stalls.
Routine vet stuff is scheduled on days you can be home (take a half day Friday, or for some who get bank/military holidays schedule on those days well in advance)
The hay storage area is open and ready for them to stack; I don’t need to be there. Yeah, maybe that means I pay more per bale, but I’d rather do that than move hay around.

Tell people you work and ask if they do later hours or Saturdays. You may be surprised; I know a vet who barely works on Fridays because her kids have a half school day that day, but works from noon to 2 on Saturday because they have sports practice then.

And if you can’t do any of that, shrug your shoulders and think how lucky we are to have our animals, even if they sometimes are a pain!

(Side note on getting another horse. I currently have 8 horses. 8. One of me, 8 of them. One is leased out, so I only care for 7, but still. It’s too many, but it’s also just right. So maybe I guess it could be worse )

[JB]

I/we did it for years. He and I both worked full time away from home. We built our farm while working full time away from it (40 minute drive from home, about 20 minutes from my work building). We started with 2 horses, then 3. We have always had cats (2 when we moved in, they multiplied to 7 at the highest), and about a year after we moved in we got 2 dogs (70lb GSDs)

I WAS fortunate that my boss allowed the time I needed for vet things, though if it was going to be more like 4+ hours away, I would just take a half day vacation.

There WERE times I’d get a call from a neighbor that a horse was wandering on the road. That was while he was on solitary pasture rest, after a few weeks of stall rest, after rupturing a tendon. So having a work environment that allowed me to literally drop everything and run home (remember, just 20 minutes) was amazing.

I also tried to schedule all my vet appointments for as late in the day as possible, knowing I could easily take off 1-2 hours and make it up later in the week, but also knowing that it wouldn’t be a big deal if (when) she was late because of emergencies

Everybody who has never done what someone else has done/is doing, always thinks it’s too had and that you’re crazy. That doesn’t mean it’s NOT hard, absolutely it can be.

Can doggy go to high activity daycare a few days a week?
Can your farrier be scheduled for first or last thing in the day, so that other customers aren’t holding him up (morning) or it doesn’t matter (much) if he’s late at the end of the day?

Wanting another horse - if you’re going to be unhappy with all the work, and none of the fun of riding, then not crazy at all. Just vet him very very carefully so at least you don’t go into it buying problems. Only you can know the timing of that new horse in relation to the exit of the mini (I’m so sorry!). If 4 horses greatly increases the work, then wait until after the mini is gone.

And yes, do take a really hard, closer look at the operations to see what, if anything, can be made more simple or hands off, as StormyDay mentioned.

[Libby2563]

So, on the one hand, if you have horses at home at all you will be subject to a certain amount of that stress no matter what (farrier, hay deliveries, vet calls, etc). Perhaps you will need hay a little less often with fewer horses, or your farrier visits won’t be so long. But if you have to deal with these things anyway, you might as well add on another horse and have one to ride, right? (Enabler here.)

On the other hand your question is whether you are crazy to want another horse at home, and it’s not clear to me that you do want another one, when you say things like “I am just tired of dealing with it all.” You sound a bit burned out. No judgment at all–BTDT and totally understand it! If you don’t feel strongly either way, to me that would be a sign to wait until I did feel strongly. Perhaps when your mare’s prognosis becomes more clear? (Sorry about that, btw.) Or if it’s winter for you now, until spring arrives and farm life sucks less?

On the other other hand, I bought a horse in November despite having mixed feelings about complicating my easy little herd and taking on the additional financial burden. He was too nice and reasonably priced to pass up and I was pretty confident I could resell if it ended up not being a match (I imported off video). So I understand feeling conflicted and going for it anyway. Perhaps just make sure that if you do buy, the new horse is marketable enough that you don’t feel trapped.

[MorganMaresVT]

I’m not sure that I could do it without working from home, though to be fair my work from home schedule has always been based around a 50 hour work week (have worked from home since roughly 2010).

I’ve had three horses at home since 2019, 2 retired, one in work. We lost one of our beloved retired horses this winter, and plenty of people told me I was crazy to replace her with another retired horse rather than a younger greenie. My main riding horse is 15 this year, and when I want to ride, I want to ride something that I can just hop on and go. I suppose that’s my compromise to making it work- a relatively uncomplicated riding horse so that when I make the time to ride, I can just get on and ride. The thought of a project was incredibly stressful and just not something I wanted to take on.

Using vacation days because someone is late to an appointment is incredibly frustrating though- have definitely been there and can commiserate!

[TheJenners]

I live alone on my farm, work 40+ hours a week, and some times yes I travel for training. I have four horses (one retired, one coming 2) and two mini donkeys plus chickens and a doggo. Plus regular farm maintenance like mowing and weedwhacking, dragging the arena, and oh yeah a large garden.

I have a dog sitter and my father lives local, they both have clickers to my gate and a house key and my doggo gets picked up midday most days for playdates and walkies. And sometimes I can get my Dad to dump the manure trailer if work interferes with my schedule, or pick up feed and sometimes meet the vet or farrier tho I prefer to not do that - he is savvy enough but also wears flip flops and doesn’t pay the best attention and has gotten a couple black eyes from my heathens swinging their head suddenly, and sometimes I find stalls closed but not latched or he picks up hay that is moldy. I burn PTO for that, NBD, it isnt like I’m saving them for a big fancy vacation (see above, live alone on a farm ).

Not saying it’s easy, it’s not. Also not cheap, to make my life easier I have a young man do some weekend mucking of my paddocks (I do stalls daily) and I have a house cleaner come in twice a month (woooorth it). Am I still stressed and don’t ride as much as I want? Yep. Does getting soaked or frozen suck? Yep. Do I curse the stupid chickens or stubborn donkeys or the dog for constantly getting underfoot? You bet! But I still love it.

[Jealoushe]

I don’t think so…. But I have 4 of my own and three dogs at home and am single and work full time away from home lol

Wouldn’t have it any other way.

[callyhan]

Thanks all. Think I was just venting. I don’t really need anything, I am lucky to have a helpful partner and a great employer. Sometimes I listen to conversations and can’t believe how different my life is from my coworkers and think that I’m doing something wrong. But then I come here and feel normal .

It’s also been a long, cold, hard winter and I feel like I haven’t accomplished anything with my riding since covid began. Fingers crossed for all for a fun riding season filled with great weather.

[McGurk]

@callyhan,

When I worked full time (I am now retired) my co-workers were fascinated by my lifestyle and would talk about how much work it was. Those comments always baffled me, because what they called work was my leisure time. I had a house cleaner coming in twice a month, so spending a Saturday bushhogging or haying didn’t seem like a bad deal. Honestly, when we bought this place and set it up, it was with the knowledge that we’d both be working away from home 40 - 50 hours a week.

Farrier and vet appointments were a struggle. I would put them in my Outlook calendar as “Dr. Blank.” and “Dr. Alias.” If anyone every noticed that I saw Dr. Blank, podiatrist, at regular 5 week intervals, they never said anything. I was blessed with mostly healthy, problem free critters, so the appointments with Dr. Alias were easier to work around.

The very worst was when I had an injury or when the tiny pony foundered. I’d be out in the barn, cold hosing or soaking, at zero dark thirty, and be rushing back into the house to get kiddo ready and get showered and changed for work.

Yes, it’s been a terrible winter, and you’ve probably been taking care of all the animals in the dark for far too long.

I diagnose you with a bad case of the Februaries. Fortunately the cure is coming soon.

[Mango20]

Not crazy, what’s one more horse? Having 4 horses at home really won’t be much different than having 3.

I defiantly kept 3-4 horses at home after my XH left for greener pastures. I thought “he’s taken everything else away, but he can’t take this!” I was suddenly a single mother to a toddler, with 3 or 4 horses at home, two dogs, and (after getting rehired) a full time job with a 45 minute commute. It was probably not the best logic to keep it all going out of spite, but it worked out and I’ve come out on the other side. My riding and definitely competing goals were put on the back burner for several years. The horses didn’t mind. Now I look at the three I have now and go back and forth about whether I’ll get a new horse when the current 28 year old finally decides she’s had enough. I know I won’t go back to four horses (which I had until a year ago), but that’s more because my pasture can’t handle it then it being more work.

[exvet]

Okay, I guess for total transparency, you should know that I have never known life without a horse. I have always worked full-time when I wasn’t in school. I also had kids (which have survived to adulthood) and a successful breeding program. So at the moment I’m 58, own 4 horses and retain breeding rights to the stallion I sold to my daughter a few years ago. I work full-time, still train (ie, back and start my own) and still show. Exactly what would you like to commiserate about or need enabling for? We’re crazy? We suffer an equine addiction? We might die a year or two sooner because we burn the candle at both ends? We are following our passion? BTW I have 3 dogs too.

[Texarkana]

I feel this on every level.

Both me and my husband work away from the farm.

I love the lifestyle, most of the time. But when it rains it pours!!!

My biggest frustrations are a) emergencies, and b) appointments, especially those abiding by “standard horse person time” (when they say I’ll get there when I get there because… horses)

Finding and keeping professionals who understand my plight is critical. I have some criticisms of my farrier, but he shows up on time for evening appointments; that alone is worth it’s weight in gold. My vet works with me and my schedule when she can, and I try to be respectful of her time in return. I try to set it up so my hay guy can deliver without me, but this always falls apart so instead I try to coordinate only one big delivery a year. It’s a total headache with a lot of other appointments.

[Live_Wire]

Buy the horse. We’re all a little mad here.

Three horses, four dogs, five cats, full time job, this past year I started a business with my significant other and he travels frequently.

My biggest frustration is travel. I have yet to secure a dependable farm sitter for overnights/travel.

[eponacelt]

When other people you work with take their kids to the doctor, do they take sick leave or vacation leave? I ask because at my org, people take sick leave. So that’s what I do when my “kids” need to see the vet or farrier.

You’re not crazy. I work from home now, but I travel a fair bit and didn’t WFH when we first bought the farm. I did just sell a horse so I’m down to 1 in work and a companion pony. But I did just add a 3rd dog, and I do think I’m crazy because I now own 220+lbs of dogs. I’m insane.

[lenapesadie]

Me too. It’s a dr appointment.

OP - I’m all for a riding horse.

[Janet]

I have had (2 -4) horses at home while working full time from 1985 until I retired in 2020. My commute started off being 30 min each way, and grew to 1 1/2 hr each way. (Office moved AND traffic got worse.)

Luckily my farrier was happy to handle the horses without me (left them in the paddock with their halters on, and a check). Vet appointments (if not emergency) were scheduled first thing in the morning, and I just worked late that day. Or if the vet HAD to come in the middle of the day I worked from home that day.

[LilyandBaron]

In my adulthood, I’ve been horseless, riding at sales barns; I’ve boarded - full care to self care, and finally have the herd at home. Having them at home has increased my riding time, except in the dead of winter since I don’t have an indoor. I don’t commute to the barn, so I spend less time on stalls/chores than I did commuting. I think having a smart set up to the barn makes more difference than one more horse - obviously going from 3-4 to 10-15 would make a huge difference. I am fortunate to have a job that accommodates my lifestyle now - I adapted my horse involvement to my jobs in the past, not owning a farm until it made sense.

The other thing I know about myself - I need an outlet for my energy. My friends laugh, but when I didn’t have enough going on with a job I took during a career transition, I literally got into competitive body building, which is really not like my personality - the onstage part, lol. So, I know if I had less to do, I might appreciate it on a day here and there, but ultimately, I’d find something else to put my energy into. Might as well do it with horses!