I think my cat is cheating on me

I ha/e 3 cats. Dickens, Bugaboo, and Puddin. The First 2 go in and out as they please. Puddin doesn’t go outside. I see many instances on Cheezburger of cats going from one house to another. I think Dickens is doing that. He disappears almost always during the day. Comes back to see if there is dinner, and if so he eats, and if not scurries back thru the doggie door. He doesn’t ha/e free access anymore-I need to keep the door closed because of Trooper barking. Sometimes he is out all night like last night. when he came in this morning, he wasn’t cold.

Bug worships him, but he is a rough boy. from the day I brought him (Bug)home as a small kitten, he has been quite rough with D. Dickens is a gentle soul and hates roughhousing. If Dickens is at the new scratching post, Bug has to join in lea|/es angrilyMaybe he found someone who doesn’t have a pest little brother. Should I put a little collar on him that says He is mine?

The other family might just take a collar off. If you are that worried about it, get a microchip.

he is chipped but if they would take off a collar they won’t look for a chip. He is a big and healthy cat. No way he looks like a stray. I am just thinking of reminding them he isn’t lost.

I think you are better off trying to identify the family and approach in person. If they think it’s “their cat”, as opposed to just a cat they feed, seeing him show up in a collar might make them decide to keep him indoors because someone is “poaching their cat”.

1 Like

I guess you could put one of those GPS tags on a collar and see where he is going. If the collar comes off and he disappears you at least would have a location to go looking.

I hae thought about that but he would likely freak out at that. To get out of the yard, he scales a nearly 7 ft fence. I would like to know where he is going tho.

I don’t have a solution but just want to add that I have a wandering cat too. My experience was similar to yours. Particularly, in warmer months I never saw him until feeding time and he wanted to go back out right after. It wasn’t until I got a text from a neighbor that he was over doing yoga with her and walking her kid to the bus stop in the morning that my suspicions were confirmed. I was on the verge of attaching gps or something similar to a go pro to see what he was up to while out and about. I’ve also found that people without indoor/outdoor cats don’t understand how I could let my cat out when there are dangers out (cold temps, cars, predators, etc.) and so someone may be ‘feeling sorry for him’ and taking him in. Animals have a way of drawing unwarranted sympathy. In actuality, my guy will literally throw a tantrum and becomes destructive when I don’t let him out. He needs his outside time. Sounds silly but perhaps a collar with a custom tag inviting those who have an encounter with him to share what he’s up to, “my mom would love to see what I’m up to. Pls share at xxx”.

3 Likes

oh yeah, if they want out they will destroy the house if they are not let out. One man looked at an ad for his neighbor’s house that was for sale and one of the pics was his cat on the bed!

1 Like

We have a feral cat we are feeding, I think he makes the rounds to all the neighbors to see who puts out the best cat food. He is also known by a different name at each place. We have been unable to trap him and I think it is because he has so many options for food. We tried to coordinate with the neighbors to trap him but so far he has outsmarted us all.

Maybe if you have snow on the ground you can follow his tracks to see where else he goes.

2 Likes

My sister had a cat that did that. Milkdud was an indoor/ outdoor cat and he would disappear in cold weather. He would come back smelling like smoke. Turns out he was going to the neighbor’s house and they would let him in and sleep by the fire. He liked his second family!

2 Likes

what I’m afraid of is that he might be trying to escape his bratty brother. What if he CHOOSES another. He will break my heart.

My first cat did that.

When I was 3 we lived in faculty housing at UBC in Vancouver, BC. Dogs were not allowed, but cats were. We went to the local shelter and two kittens, which we named Jack (russian blue) and Jill (ginger). Jack was nominally my younger sister’s, and Jill was nominally mine.

It turned out they were both males, but we didn’t change the names. They didn’t particularly like being two males in the same house, and Jill would often disappear for 3 or 4 days at a time.

When I was 5 we were preparing to move to the east coast of the US (my father decided he didn’t like teaching, and got a job at IBM Research). We moved by taking a weeks long camping trip across the continent. So the cats needed to be fixed, and then they would need to be boarded while we were moving, and then flown to New York once we had arrived.

We carefully kept Jill inside, so he would be there on the day of the vet appointment.

After a few days a grad student couple put up notices about their lost cat, and went door to door around the campus housing looking for him. It turned out they thought Jill was THEIR cat. Everyone was very upset. Eventually my parents convinced me that we should let Jill make the choice. If he was with us the day we took Jack to the boarding kennel, Jill would go too, and join us in New York. If he wasn’t with us that day, he would stay with the grad student couple.

He stayed in Vancouver. But I have always chosen ginger cats when I have a choice.

Postscript-
After we had arrived in New York, and moved into our new house, we got notice that Jack had arrived, and we went to the cargo section of the airport (I think it was Idlewild) to pick him up. Even though we had all the appropriate paperwork, the attendant insisted that he had no such package, and, in particular, he didn’t have ANY cats in transit. They were talking quite loudly, when they were interrupted by a loud MEOW. Jack WAS there, and he meowed when he heard my father’s voice.

4 Likes

What makes you think he is going to another house? He may just rather be out and away from the other cat you have if he feels threatened. If he wasn’t cold when coming in from being out all night then maybe he was in the barn or another warm place he has.

I would be more concerned if he wasn’t coming home to eat. Some cats just wander or have a personality where they like to visit.

2 Likes

No Barn here in my garage is closed up I do worry about bug bullying him. He’s much bigger than the other two cats. But he’s not fat he’s just big and I I don’t quite understand that they all get fed pretty much the same thing here but and a lot of times he turns his nose up at the food which makes me think he is eating someplace else it’s not I’m just worried that he might decide that he finds somebody he likes better because I’m I am concerned about bug picking on him all the time bug picks on couldn’t too he’s a nuisance if I wasn’t I don’t ever get rid of my cats kind of a person I would get rid of him little creep

We had one cat pack up and desert us for some neighbors, who tempted him away with chicken giblets and other goodies.

1 Like

Beton Bill that is the exact same thing that I’m worried about because I’m worried that bug beating up on him will drive him away and that if he’s found somebody else and they’re feeding him giblets he might decide he doesn’t like kibble and canned I don’t know

I missed that he was suddenly turning up his nose at food. Cats are funny about changing homes if the circumstances are right…

We had a neighbors cat just come to us because their GSD was mean to him . I didn’t feed him at first because he was their cat but one day I came out of the house eating a sandwich , and he climbed up my body grabbing at it!

I fed him the sandwich and promptly went inside got a bowl and fed him some kibble. He lived in my small hay shed from there on out.

1 Like

I have a Tractive from Chewy. I was $35 on Chewy. You do need to subscribe but so cool if you have decent cell coverage. It’s not very heavy though designed for dogs. Might be worth it to solve your mystery? Our cat is definitely cheating on us.

1 Like

thank you for that I looked up the go pro and thought oh yeah 2, please! That would be nice IF he will wear it and not fall on the floor in a hissy fit YOU PUT SOMETHING Around MY NECK!!!