Jaw Bone Tumor

[ClassyRide]

So, to make a very long story short, I had a CT scan last Wednesday, after many months of Dr’s visits, pain, swelling in my face, and just a general feeling of tired/nqr, that showed a tumor about the size of a golf ball inside the bone of my jaw. Thankfully, it’s not blatantly obvious when you look at me (that side looks a little puffy, but the tumor is well nestled where my cheek bone meets my jaw, right near the ear, so it’s pretty well hidden) - however, that’s also probably part of the reason why no Dr caught onto it until the CT scan was done.

Honestly, I’m not really sure why I’m posting about it except that I think I need some shoulders today, even if they are of the virtual variety. At this point, the only thing we know is that it’s a tumor. I have an appointment with another specialist next week. I assume he’ll run tests to find out whether it’s benign or malignant. But, in the meantime, the waiting and not knowing is weighing on me.

The good thing is that the Dr who reviewed the CT scan said that the way it grew makes him think it’s probably benign. He didn’t discount the possibility of Cancer, but said that most of the time, Cancer eats away at things as it grows. But this tumor has remained inside the bone, just pushing it out as it has grown (causing a ton of bone pain, some days more than others - my poor jaw bone!). So, that is a plus I guess.

The first 2 or 3 days after I was told about this, I was a hot mess. After the initial shock wore off, I felt oddly serene for a while. But today I’m not doing so well with it again. :no: Any words of experience or encouragement would be greatly appreciated today. I don’t normally need a whole lot of support (I’m pretty independent), but I know I need it today.

[monstrpony]

I understand. Nothing I can do or say to change how you feel, but what you are feeling is totally reasonable. The only solution is patience, to wait till the next appt, which is cruel but it seems to be how the medical folks have to work.

Best wishes and jingles for a favorable outcome!

Try to keep busy and not think about it (I know, big help; wish I had a better idea). Another of life’s adventures …

[draftdriver]

Let us hope for some swift answers, so you can decide on a course of action. I find that waiting is not an easy thing to bear.

((((Hugs))))

[ClassyRide]

Thank you both so very much. I really appreciate the understanding and support.

It’s such an odd thing how these sorts of things can sometimes creep up on you unawares and then leap out and surprise you. I’d known I had something in there for about a year now. The first time I felt it, it was a little bigger than a pea; maybe like a small marble size? And over the last year, it’s grown into the golf ball. All this time, even though I knew something wasn’t right, I wasn’t afraid. I just figured it was something simple that would either heal itself, or be easily taken care of. And that was confirmed (I thought) when the first specialist I saw thought I had either a stone or a cyst in the salivary gland on that side of my face. After months of seeing him and no improvement, that’s when he ordered the CT Scan.

It’s such a weird thing - I kind of know what our horses feel like now when they’ve seen the same rock next to the ring, day after day, and they always look a little funny at it but don’t think much of it - until one day it grows fangs and leaps out at them. Yeah. I guess my rock grew fangs, and now it’s very scary. But just like with our “kids,” I just need to focus on forward and ride through. <-- And yes, I’m a cornball. :yes:

[Graymaresrule]

{{{{HUGS}}}}

Waiting is the pits. Ask anyone who has gotten the dreaded Mammogram callback

[moonriverfarm]

Sending prayers for peace as you wait, cause that is the hardet part!

[FalseImpression]

Waiting is always the worst because you can’t help your mind from imagining the worst case scenario. Once you know, then you and your doctor can execute Plan A or Plan B and get into action. I remember so well.
Best wishes and loud jingles.

[MunchkinsMom]

Hugs to you! The waiting and not knowing is the hardest part, so please use the COTH broad virtual shoulders to lean on while you wait.

Jingles for a good outcome.

[witherbee]

Sending jingles your way, and praying it’s benign and not too difficult to treat/remove. Whatever it is, you’ll get through it - we horsewomen, and women in general, are tough that way. The waiting is the worst - try to distract yourself - it’s out of your hands at this time other then to send positive energy to yourself and that spot. I am no weird new-ager, but having had cancer, I do believe that it helps to actually visualize the tumor going away, be it benign or malignant. Something to do with the immune system when you are upbeat rather than depressed.

Anyway, wishing you the very best outcome with this, and so sorry for your pain and worry!

[MunchkinsMom]

@witherbee;5786313

Sending jingles your way, and praying it’s benign and not too difficult to treat/remove. Whatever it is, you’ll get through it - we horsewomen, and women in general, are tough that way. The waiting is the worst - try to distract yourself - it’s out of your hands at this time other then to send positive energy to yourself and that spot. I am no weird new-ager, but having had cancer, I do believe that it helps to actually visualize the tumor going away, be it benign or malignant. Something to do with the immune system when you are upbeat rather than depressed.

Anyway, wishing you the very best outcome with this, and so sorry for your pain and worry!

Excellent advice! I also firmly believe in the power of positive thinking and health.

[tarynls]

I also had a tumor in my jaw - but specifically in the TMJ. The tumor was large (forget the exact measurements) when removed and had caused so much pressure in the joint that it eroded the condyle of my jaw and the base of my skull above the ear; the dura of the brain was visible when the thing was taken out.

Thankfully, the tumor was benign - pathology came back as chondromatosis (very common in knees). My doc is the head of oral & maxillofacial surgery at UPenn and I was the 10th patient he’d seen with this in 25 years of practice.

I know how scary the waiting is; after all, I just thought I had TMJ for 8 years - he does his CT scan, and tells me there’s a mass - I think I was in shock for days.

PM me if you need to talk or if you want details about surgery, etc.

[FalseImpression]

You really wonder why they don’t order a CT scan sooner… 8 years? 10 years? wow… Imagine if it was not benign… waiting that long to figure out what it is???

[tradewind]

Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. The anxiety associated with waiting just sucks. Reaching out to others is a good thing, it will help keep you occupied while you wait. Try to keep the most positive scenario in the front of your mind instead of the worst. This is of course, more easily said than done. Having had several severe health issues I know how waiting just preys on you. Do the best you can with positive thoughts and keep us updated as you find out stuff. We will all be pulling for you!

[DressageGeek_Ribbon]

This is the hardest part - the not knowing. Once you know, you can start a plan of action, and then you feel you are being proactive - whatever it is. Happy to be your shoulders, and PM anytime or e mail at wendin@specialhorses.org.

And you know, sometimes life is just unfair.

[ClassyRide]

Thank you all SO much. You don’t realize (or maybe you do) just how much your support means to me right now.

I’m keeping very busy at work. Unfortunately, I haven’t been doing very much outside of work because I’m just so darn exhausted. I think that might be when it gets to me the most. I have plans this coming weekend, though. So, hopefully that will help, if I can drag my tired butt off of the couch to see people.

I also feel like I need to get to the barn more often. Horse Therapy is a lovely drug. :yes: I board my horses a little over 1/2 hour from where I live. It’s unfortunate they’re so far away, but I did it for them - the care is impeccable there, which is tougher than it should be to find in a boarding situation. But, because of a few factors, including the drive being so long and my feeling so tired all of the time, I have only gotten out there once a week for the past month or two. And even when I do go, I rarely do more than groom them, hug them and give them peppermints. Not that they really mind, but I wish I could still be riding/working them on a regular basis. I guess it just isn’t in the cards right now, which is also frustrating on many levels.

At least I have my horses, though. They’re such sweet beasts… always listen when I need someone to talk to. And one of them in particular seems very in tune with me. If I’m upset and go into his stall, he’ll leave his hay to come snuff me and ask what’s wrong. <3 I love them so much.

[tarynls]

PM sent to ClassyRide.

However, for anyone else that may be going through TMJ issues, surgical or non-surgical, there is an amazing forum that is chock full of information. The people there were a great source of support for me when I went through my surgery & recovery.

Here you go; you need to register (it’s free): www.tmjsurgeryfamily.com

[ClassyRide]

I just wanted to give a quick update to everyone about my doctor’s appointment on Wednesday. Things sound like it’ll go much better than I’d anticipated, so let’s hope I can keep riding this happy train all the way to surgery.

Let me first say that this specialist is excellent. I get nothing but warm-fuzzy vibes off of him. He’s also light-hearted, and knows how to get his patients to laugh and smile. That helps immensely, as some of you have pointed out in this thread.

So, firstly, he is very confident that this is not cancer. He said that it would be SO weird for it to be cancer (because of the way it’s presenting, where it’s located, and how it looks on the CT Scan) that if it turned out to be, I would become a medical case study. So, yeah - we’re pretty darn sure it’s benign. ::clap, clap::

Also, he said that my tumor does not involve the Condyl of the jaw at all - it’s just in front of it. So, I won’t need a joint replacement, and he’s pretty certain we can just get away with removing the tumor and still have enough bone there to just let it heal without any grafts or anything.

His one concern is that the tumor has grown rather close to one of the major facial nerves. So, as he’s removing it, he’s going to be paying very close attention to that nerve so he does not damage it. To help his odds, he also has me scheduled for an MRI next week so he can get yet another view of the tumor and surrounding structures.

I don’t go in for surgery until October 3rd. So, I have to suffer with the pain for another month. However, at least there’s light at the end of the tunnel now. Thank goodness!!!

Surgery itself is a rather scary prospect, so don’t be surprised if I start needing shoulders again closer to that date. But, for now at least, I’m feeling pretty good about this whole thing. At least, as good as I can be considering the circumstances.

Thank you again everyone for all of your kind words!! I feel so blessed to have you all “around” me. ::Hugs!::

[monstrpony]

Sounds very positive! Sorry about having to wait til Oct, but … Gives you more time to get used to it, maybe it will feel less overwhelming by then. A bit scary about the nerve, but they’re pretty good with those things, and it sounds like he’s taking all precautions. Hang in there!

[RacetrackReject]

That’s great that they think it’s benign!

My boss was one of those medical case studies (small cell carcinoma near the salivary glands, less than 2% of cases of scc involve this area), but even though it was cancer, he is 100% free of disease now and was never sick with any of his treatments.