Living the dream in a nightmare

Just a little humor. Those that know me know how much I hate bugs. I have been terrified of bugs most of my life, I am getting better. So here is a picture of me mowing, with several grasshoppers along for the ride. I have millions, if not billions of grasshoppers. So here I am living in a nightmare, all while living my dream :rofl:

I have come to tolerate them being on my pants. But don’t be fooled, if they were sitting on my bare legs, I would be screaming “GET THEM OFF OF ME!!!”


They look so friendly! Just think, you SAVED them from the mower. Now, they love you.


Get some chickens. They’ll make a dent in the grasshopper population. And you get yummy eggs out of the deal :slight_smile:


That’s definitely on the agenda for next year!

1 Like

Keep in mind, those delicious eggs will be made from yummy BUGS! :mosquito::ant::cricket: :scream:

Kidding! :grin:
The eggs are wonderful, there really is a difference in taste :yum::egg::egg::fried_egg:

& Your little grasshopper hitchhikers are cute :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:


Maybe picture Jiminy Cricket? They’re better than spiders. This time of year in Ohio we have those huge brown ones that make big webs between trees and other things and I find I can’t go through my woods without extreme paranoia of going through a web and getting one on me. Blood curdling scream will be heard - along with nakedness tearing off clothes!


Where are you? Move south. Then you will have Palmetto Bugs ( huge flying roaches). When you encounter those monsters you will never give a fig about dealing with grasshoppers. ( I hate summer in the South).

1 Like

I’m in Central Ohio. I was wondering what it was that made those huge webs!! I would have never guessed grasshoppers. I’ve always envisioned some sort of alien pod :joy:

After I was first married we lived in Atlanta for a few years. I am familiar with the bugs of the south. I would bug spray them to death, then cover them with a paper towel and let my husband dispose of them. And then at one point we had termites. UGH. Living on the house while the bugs ARE LIVING IN THE WALLS?!?!? No thank you. Never again. Some of the best friends I have to this day I made in those years in Atlanta and I go visit every few years.

I have several amusing bug stories I could tell.


It gives me immense satisfaction to feed Japanese beetles collected from the raspberries and Rosa rugosa to our chickens.


Um, no. Big spiders make those big webs. Horrible.

I’m another grasshopper fan who thinks your passengers are cute. But I also sympathize with you because if those were spiders on my pants I would have fallen off the mower and run over myself from the shock.


Ok I reread the comment. I get it now LOL. I was picturing big brown grasshoppers :laughing:


I grew up seeing humongous webs made by caterpillars. Tent caterpillars, I think they’re called. Their “tents” would put any spider to shame.

But goodness, the caterpillars themselves are so cute! :smiley:

When I lived in Florida I’d capture the bugs/spiders in cups. I couldn’t squish them, too gross. And bug spray takes time to take effect and several species of cockroach seemed to be immune. So they would wake up to plastic cups and know there was some sort of nasty thing under there.
My poor dad :rofl:

1 Like

And if you try to spray them with bug spray in your house, they will fly right at you.

When I was transferred to Fort Benning, GA, I discovered palmetto bugs the first day I was there, the hard way. But I did meet my very nice neighbor. When the palmetto came flying at my face, the nearest escape route was out the front door. The neighbor heard me scream and came running out to see if I was okay. I was single at the time, and he was very cute, so not such a bad experience after all. :grin:

1 Like

Omg my mom does this with spiders etc in the house! She doesn’t want to squish them so she captures them under cups and lets them starve or suffocate to death or die of old age I guess.

One time she house-sat for us and we came back to spider-cups all over the floor. Dealing with them all wasn’t the best return-from-vacation activity ever…



1 Like

When I was in highschool, we went to visit a family friend in Tampa. To this day, it remains one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. I was in the bathroom, and reached under the sink to grab the hairspray. Somehow, a dead oily roach ended up wrapped around my finger and got stuck. I was running around the house shaking my hand frantically, screaming, crying, scream-crying, until someone took a papertowel and pulled it off. That same trip I went to the bathroom and there was a huge one sitting on my toothbrush. I dread the thought of ever having to visit Florida again.

1 Like

I mow with a tractor, so I’m up higher than a lawnmower. No grasshoppers on me, but I have something more terrifying. I call them crabspiders, their back looks like a crab. They come in beautiful colors and patterns and spin webs from the ground up to the Pecan branches. Totally harmless but I nearly kill me and the tractor if one gets on me. Fortunately, they put white ‘guide lines’ on their webs so I can usually go around. Now back to grasshoppers. I have birds called Mississippi Kites, lovely birds. BUT, they swoop down to grab the grasshoppers I scare up and nearly hit me. Think fast, unexpected, large, black object zooming past your head as you mow and sing to your headset. I’m glad to help them get dinner, but jeeze, it can be a shock.

1 Like

I hate grasshopper season, and have been known to strip my jeans off, right on the spot, if one happens to go up my pant leg. The neighbours get a show every now and then. Lol

1 Like

Much adorbs indeed. But I am the kid who chased, caught, and admired what I now know are Carolina locusts (grasshoppers with wings).

1 Like