I was at a show all weekend, and leading up to the show, I was busy teaching lessons and packing. I was also emailing a little back and forth with someone interested in leasing my horses. I told her that I had free time on specific days and that we could schedule for then. She emailed me back asking for the middle of the work day Monday, I said no. She emailed me back awhile later, asking for Monday at 6pm. I didn’t respond because I was at a show all weekend, with spotty service. WELL SHE SHOWED UP ANYWAYS. I had already left the barn and a student of mine who was still there called me to let me know. Is this normal? I wouldn’t just show up without a scheduled time confirmed with BOTH parties, so I feel it was pushy. I don’t think I want someone like that handling my horses, if she feels she can just show up, I feel like she would take it upon herself to do things with/to my horses without asking first. I feel like showing up uninvited/unconfirmed is a HUGE red flag. She never even gave me a heads up the day of… 
I woudl not feel that was a good fit for me and not deal with her further…
How rude! If I understand correctly, you laid out the times available and she countered with a time not offered and then showed up without confirmation that this time was ok?
I would be suspicious that this person wouldn’t respect my boundaries. I’m not sure what your leases look like, but god forbid you’re talking about a part lease with specific ride days / times. Cause this person surely doesn’t seem like a good candidate for that!
Hard pass imo, but ymmv
Okay, I’m glad I’m not the only one…
You are right, big red flag, a client you don’t want to engage, here called “PITA clients”. 
I gave her days that could possibly work for me, she asked for a time a day I said might work, I said no to the first requested time of 1pm on a Monday, due to my day job, and that I have barn chores, so it would have to be after 6 pm on any day. She emailed me a while later and asked for 6pm instead and when I didn’t respond, took it upon herself to come out anyways. I just re-read the emails and can see where she might have gotten confused, but since I didn’t give the green light to come out on Monday at 6pm, I feel its rude and pushy that she showed up anyways.
I try to assume good intent. If you wrote “after 6pm on any day” then… she may have interpreted that as “come any day after 6pm”.
Yeah, I would probably have pinged after lunch “just want to confirm 6pm today!”
Some people are not very… socially adept. At this point you’ve never even seen her in person? Or even talked to her? (this was all email and text?)
Up to you. It’s your horse, you don’t have to lease it to anyone you don’t want to lease it to.
But I submit you might want to actually meet the person before writing her off completely. Only because I am quite sure I do not always make a good first impression despite trying. I am just not good at “people” and often manage to make a mistake somehow.
I agree with @wsmoak on this point. This reads to me like ‘come any day after 6pm’.
I would have made sure my day of choice was OK before coming but I can totally see how others might take that to mean ‘I am here every week day, come any of them’.
I can understand her confusion, but I don’t appreciate assumptions. I will try to schedule something with her!
It is not an assumption. It reads that you told her to come out any evening after 6.
I don’t agree, but thanks. Why would she ask for the time and when no response was given, take it that way? If she interpreted the same way you did, I don’t think she would have asked first.
I just texted her saying that we can schedule but since it’s a private facility that we both need to confirm the day and time so I can let the BO know, and so there aren’t any surprises. Sadly, it’s too hot for us to ride this week so we will have to reschedule for the weekend/next week!
She probably thought it was ok because you said “any day after 6pm” and she says “ok, I’ll be there Monday after 6pm” and you dropped the ball and ghosted her. It’s not a huge deal, but it’s just as much on you as it is on her.
This was her last email copied and pasted: “I am available Monday the 9th after 6. If you can still fit me in. I have a thousand questions and am going looking forward to meeting you. Thanks again…”
The “if you can still fit me in” implies she was waiting for confirmation, at least that’s how I interpreted it. I told her I would be at a show all weekend, which is why I wasn’t able to reply. I don’t think I necessarily “dropped the ball” but I could have put more than the bare minimum into it.
Ehh…I’d let it go and just try to reschedule. People get mixed up and it’s not necessarily because they are pushy. Confirming appointments is always a good idea of course. Not everyone does it.
I showed up for a specialty vet appointment on the wrong day, out of town, and the surgeon was unavailable because he was in surgery all that day. I was just going to go home and be back the next day but they insisted that they could find time to squeeze me in. I was so grateful. I felt like an idiot, but was just hoping they didn’t make me feel worse. They were actually so nice, it made a lasting impression on me and I try to give others the benefit of the doubt.
That being said, I would expect the next opportunity to be handled very differently, or I would consider it a red flag.
I look at her as being more eager than pushy. I see it as a miscommunication and I wouldn’t write her off or label her as not a good fit if you have not met her in person?
The fact that possible lessee said “She has a thousand questions”, would make me more nervous than anything else!
I think the biggest indicator of her character would be how she reacted when she was on-site on Monday with your student. Did she get huffy when told that you were not there? Did she try to insist on seeing the horse anyway? Did she call you in a rage? Or did she admit there might have been a miscommunication, leave quietly and circle back with you to reschedule?
I would raise an eyebrow at her not confirming an appointment, and her not understanding that horse show weekends generally mean little to no communication. Folks who have been in the horse world long enough realize that all horse professionals (trainers, farriers, saddle fitters, you name it) are working long hours outside and generally have really spotty phone reception. It can be hard for newbies to understand that unlike office workers who are taking calls, firing off emails and various other forms of constant communication all day, horse pros are in an environment that does not allow for easy communication. I try to give 48 hour turnaround time for any communication w/ a horse professional (except emergencies).
Try to schedule a phone call with this lady, get a read on her and proceed from there. She could be high-maintenance and pushy, or just green and eager. A nice phone chat should help you sort out if she is worth being a client or not.
I agree that the biggest indicator of character is how she reacted to the mix-up on Monday.
I disagree that folks who have been in the horse world a long time assume that horse professionals have spotty reception. Judging by the number of trainers I see glued to their phones at shows, I assume cell coverage is getting much better 
I’ll have to check with my other student was was there and fielded her for me. She didn’t say anything at the time, but I can call and check.
I texted the potential leaser Tuesdays at 10am and haven’t received a response yet.
