Having spent seven years a university professor now when these…conversations arise I tell people “I’m sorry, I’m no longer being paid to repeatedly smash my head against a brick wall of ignorance.”
and I say this as someone who loved 95% of my students.
but the complete lack of comprehension of human history does really concern me. And is painful. And sad.
You need some back issues of this magazine, and a Subhumans album from 1981 on your turntable.
http://www.processedworld.com/
Finding our place in the world is something every individual person has to do pretty much alone in our society. Maybe that’s what we aren’t designed for, having so much choice.
People before the industrial revolution by and large had very little choice what they did, and women had almost none. And it’s true they didn’t work 9 to 5. They worked sun up to sun down, if they were artisans or merchants or farmers.
Anyhow, choice is hard, because we don’t ever have full knowledge of the choices available, and we can’t possibly know the real outcome of our choices in advance.
For instance, i need a lot of autonomy in my life, but I’ve managed to get that by being a self starter that can work independently and even obsessively when needed.
Anyhow I think the number one skill for escaping feeling like a cog in the machine is to take responsibility for what you are doing with your life. If you are a cog in the machine it is because you have put yourself there.
How are you going to change this in a way that gives you more freedom rather than less? Do you need a change of job, do you need a change of employer, do you need a leave of absence? Do you need to find a cause outside of work?
Some of the choices we might make when we feel this way tend to lead to less freedom and fewer choices down the road. I would say quitting your job and going to work mucking stalls would be that kind of choice.
On the other hand, taking a leave of absence to go volunteer overseas for something like CUSO for a year (does that even exist anymore?) will shake up your reality whether it’s a good or bad experience, and change the parameters of your world in ways you can’t foresee.
OP, get a book called, First Break All the Rules, then find an employer who embraces this as a culture. They exist.
It’s not a lack of comprehension. It’s a deliberate selection and interpretation of fact to support an unfounded opinion. I say this as a millennial - most of the people I know are incredibly good at selectively ignoring information that doesn’t fit whatever narrative they’re currently weaving.
Amen!
Some of the posts on this thread make me a little sad. Yes, work is work, and there will always be parts of it that are boring, unfun, and related to someone else’s priorities. But I think it is not unrealistic for someone with an engineering degree to want a career that is stimulating and enjoyable, with opportunities for personal growth and fulfillment. Of course, not everyone can achieve that. (And barn staff may be Exhibit A, unfortunately.) But I will just chime in as a non-millennial with a great work life and say it is possible, and it is worth seeking.
OP, take this as a discussion, not a judgemental rant. It is possible to disagree without condemnation. For most. And you asked your elders for advice here, you need to be open to discussion even if you don’t agree. If somebody has been in the workplace for 50 years and is trying to tell you something? At least listen. Do whatever you want with the advice.
First you are reading too much into the “Best places to work” BS. It’s still a job. They have to pay people to do it. They owe the investors and stockholders a solid attempt to show a profit. It’s a business, there’s no jobs without profit. It IS about the money. Better companies figure out talking better care of employees attracts better candidates and retains more satisfied workers but it’s because they create satisfied repeat business, therefore profit. These companies are difficult to get jobs with unless you have a specific specialty they are in dire need of or have a proven work history and good references,
I ought to know, worked for two of them, one for 10 years and one for 30 years. It’s no Utopia. But before I landed that first job with a decent company, I worked for several years at a series of boring low paying entry level jobs at places with jerks for managers and high turnover because NOBODY wanted to work there or stay if they ended up there. That’s why you got your current position-the best places to work typically want prior job experience in the field to prove you’ll show up and get the work done.You need a track record to get to a job with a better company. I left most of those crap hole jobs after at least 6 months with a good referenceand each job I went to was a little better then the last.
You need to look within your field at better companies to work for while building a work history and tough this out. Not abandon your education and high earning potential. Network. And you have to be willing to relocate, have you looked nationwide? When I was your age, women were not welcome in Engineering, I envy you.
Two things you have mentioned have shown a need for a reality check. One being treated like dirt by your bosses, most barns will be the same or worse and there’s no HR department to complain to if you get sworn at, called a nasty name, didn’t get paid for overtime or got fired when one of your projects kicked you in the face and you couldn’t work for a week. Most places, barnwork falls under the Agricultural jobs definition and is exempt from " normal" expectations as far as schedule and compensation.
Yes, some barns are great. But, guess what? They want proven experience, dependability and references. You don’t start at the top in a barn or in Engineering, you climb up.
The other thing that got some of us is you must have glossed over the reading for some classes or seen too many fictionalized history moves. The Industrial Revolution created the middle class. Before it you were royalty, landed gentry, reached the hierarchy of the Church or you died by age 50 after a life of squalor. As a female, of course, no advancement for Nuns and no inheriting much of anything even if the family owned much so there wasn’t much opportunity to do anything but punch out enough kids hoping some would be males and make it to adulthood . Of course you could marry above your station but you better have sons.
Not seeing any " real freedom" for common folk back before the IR gradually starting in the late Renassance (sp?) Motivated by the needs of conquest, expansion and war, it got really rolling around the 1700s which boosted the merchant class and created a middle class. Befire that they were basically slaves to their lords in the country and to miserable conditions of cities in prior centuries.
Dont look back. Look ahead, where do you want to be in 5, 10 or even 20 years? You may not get where you think you will but you can’t look back at what Never was as a goal.
Something that helps me when I’m having an “I hate my job” crisis is going through a mental exercise in which I quit. When I find myself thinking, repeatedly, “I hate this job,” I tell myself, “OK, then, quit. Go find another job. Take early retirement.” Thus far, in recent years, when I mentally run the options, I always “decide” to stay where I am. Which makes it my choice and makes me feel better, because, hey, it may not be the perfect job, but I’ve decided that this job is my best option at this point and I choose to work here.
The company I work for offers careers that can be “stimulating and enjoyable, with opportunities for personal growth and fulfillment.” (We also employ lots of engineers.) But, that doesn’t just happen to you by virtue of working here. It requires a fair amount of effort on the part of the individual to achieve. You can’t just show up to work and say, “OK, boss, stimulate me, make me happy, fulfill me, and promote me on a regular schedule.” As an employee, it requires an investment of your own time and effort, often in ways that are, at least initially, outside your regular work responsibilities.
I think that many young people at the beginning of their careers fail to grasp that. I know that I didn’t get it in my first, and probably my second, post-college job.
@emmo if you don’t know where the Maddens are located (or who they are), that implies pretty strongly that you are not even remotely qualified to be an FEI groom.
Take an unpaid leave of absence and take a job for some trainer and you’ll get a pretty quick dose of reality that even in the horse world you’ll be working for someone else, not making important decisions, feeling unfulfilled, being directed to do things you disagree with, have mean supervisors who still don’t give a shit about your growth/development, and oh…you’ll be doing it for a fraction of your current pay and benefits. And you’ll get injured (possibly badly) at some point if you do it long enough.
[sarcasm] So fun though! Horsies! [/sarcasm]
- former professional rider who is now happily employed in a non-horse career
this isn’t unique to millenials 
it’s why I said this is how 1984 happens :lol:
amen, I don’t think it’s unrealistic either…unfortunately, it’s the internet and people smacking each other over the head with extreme biased views is the norm. unplug and unfollow is all one can do.
OP I’m curious as to whether you’ve actually owned a horse or been around horses to a substantial degree?
I say this because horse people tend towards the pragmatic, the get er done, the suck it up and don’t whine.
But also every single horse person is propelled by an overwhelming obsession and passion that shapes their life and motivates them to work through injury, illness, fear, disappointment, and grief.
If they don’t have this obsession and work ethic they sell their horse and take up an easier hobby.
So every single person on this chat board has a lfe with a driving obsessive purpose at the center, and most of us have become better people for it.
You will get absolutely no support for anything that looks like whining from horse people. You will however get a dozen different bits of practical advice, often contradictory, which is the same if you ask about horse nutrition, training advice, or how to bandage a leg.
If you have a deep and abiding obsession, any world that allows you to act on that obsession is pretty much OK, and you find ways to allow that obsession.
Now I am not sure if horses just select for this personality type, or if they create it. Probably a bit of both.
For some people, horses are the only obsession they have in their life. Or maybe they were able to make horses fill their whole life.
But for myself, even when I havent had a horse, I’ve been able to fully commit to many other things in this same way. Writing, grad school, community projects, travel, teaching, etc. There have always been things that demanded my full attention and effort and work.
I find it hard to imagine what a life could be without this ability. And while I would probably say out loud that live been lucky to find these things, really in looking back and looking at other people, I realize that it might be more a psychological orientation. You don’t go looking for an overwhelming interest that takes you out of yourself, but you find those commitments around you.
When I am up against a person, especially a young person, who has no particular strong interests, I really don’t know what advice to give them.
This isn’t a new thing, it’s not a millennial thing. Honestly I don’t see that much difference between my generation and more recent ones.
With one exception. As the total population of young people in North America shrinks relative to older folks, there is much less of a true oppositional or even fun youth culture.
The baby boomers who were the 1960s young adults had numbers on their side, and while my cohort was a bit smaller we got to ride in their wake. Hippies, then punks, then later grunge and raves. If you were dissatisfied with the status quo there were physical (not just virtual) worlds you could escape to and live within for a while, that gave you a strong community of interest and a venue to work through feelings of alienation.
Without much of an “alternative” youth culture open to them, I think contemporary teens and young adults are more alone with their anxieties and depressions, and more isolated in the adult world, especially with the high rate of what used to be called an “only child” and seen to be a vulnerable oddity.
But I dont see them as fundamentally different than preceding generations.
Anyhow back to my main point.
People who have the ability to find an obsession and make it happen will always have a sense of purpose in their lives.
People who don’t are a bit of a mystery to me.
I think there has been a lot of good advice on this thread. OP may not want to hear some of it, but it is out there.
I’ll share a quick personal story.
Long ago blah blah I made the decision to opt out of the equine career. 20 plus years into my career I can afford my farm, to show, for my kid to show, go to clinics etc. Several of my friends have stayed in the industry, one as a groom, one as a braider, one as a trainer. Groom burned out and recently left, rarely rode her own horse, braider has been hurt more times than we can count- doesn’t ride anymore. Trainer seems to have a good gig as a relatively BNT, nice barn, goes to Florida etc. Oh- he rarely rides anymore either but does judge etc.
My trainer left a regular job to do the horses. He is AMAZING, GP rider. Oh- he’s backed by his very wealthy family, so he can function autonomously, had an indoor and barn built with no mortgage… He is amazing. But he also does not have to worry about wha t90% of us would have to to make the leap.
A girl whom groomed on the side for a trainer decided to quit her job in the medical field, get out of the daily grind and work with horses. I took her out to dinner, we chatted, I gently cautioned her of the lack of health insurance, real vacation time, (because I am old now and appreciate these thing that my parents warned me about 20 years ago) the REAL life of some grooms etc. She quit her job (with benefits and perks) to groom (with no insurance). Not 8 months later Barn A let her go to replace her, she’s looking to groom for Barn B but has to sell her horse in the meantime.
I’m not saying that to scare you. I am friends with some people who really love their equine jobs and wouldn’t change a damn thing.
I have MORE friends who have left “the life” and are happier for it.
My advice is do what you feel will make you happy with your eyes wide open. No job is perfect, weigh your choices carefully and do not close any doors- in case you want to turn around and go back.
Good luck.
I wasn’t going to jump into this, but I feel compelled to respond.
I am a 33yo female civil engineer. I’ve worked in various places prior to my current position with my local government. My prior employer was an oil and gas consultant. Lovely people to work for…truly believed in and instituted the “Serviant Leadership” business structure. However, three years ago, when the oil market crashed, the industry changed. Pay got cut, benefits got cut, and we were treated like commodities, not professionals. It wasn’t just isolated to my employer. It’s basically an industry-wide shift. So I got out.
I found a job with better hours, albeit with less pay. I don’t love my job, but I don’t hate it either. I’m a drainage engineer and there are some very rewarding and tangible success in what I do. There’s also politics and budgets and dealing with angry residents.
Every job has pros and cons. If you want to make a difference, corporate America (or Canada) is probably not the place for you, but like others have said, the equine industry has all of this aspects you hate about your current job, probably on a larger scale.
My advice to you: get that chip off your shoulder and really think about some of the advice that’s been given here. Good luck.
No, it’s not unrealistic, but as we are saying it’s a two way street- what are you going to do for the company? lots here about what you want the company to do for you.
Yes, EVERYONE wants what you want, it’s not something cooked up by your generation. however, from what you post it seems that you lack a strategy for your career
Find a good mentor both in your field and work on developing skills for a horse career on the side.
Professional show barn groom is MUCH better then “barn slave”.
Or you could develop skills in marketing or PR. Lots of companies need to hire for things like video services, accounting, webdesign, etc They are often niche markets and not able to pay FT- more like contract basis. If you want to remain a true professional (ie- not slave) this is your best bet.
NETWORK- you need to network to make it in any field. Don’t just talk about what you desire in a job- that isn’t how you are successful. See how you can surround yourself with those who are doing things you want, see how they did it, and how you can show them you have those same skills. Go back to school to fill in gaps- I did this three times as the ecnomony changed.
Passion is a buzz word that means nothing. Show them your skills and commitment.
Read my original post…I asked for barn recommendations, not advice on how to function in my company and how to live my life. If you don’t have any barn recommendations, keep your advice to yourself. I never signed up for this.
Instead of all these excuses…what have you actually done to look for a new job?
ETA - with the attitude you have shown on this thread, I wouldn’t recommend any barns that I liked.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
golden.
again, I asked for barn recommendations, not an interrogation. If you don’t have a recommendations, you’re not obligated to comment.
By submitting your email, you agree to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. You may also receive promotional emails from The Chronicle of the Horse. You can opt out at any time.
For Customers
Company
Terms of Use
