You could also say, I can video your round if you give me your phone to use. No texting required.
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@RugBug I totally agree with what you’re saying above and I’m sorry I mischaracterized what you said. Not my intention.
My original example was someone with persistent behavior that was unwanted. I’m not so much talking about one weird hug. The pervasive element is from my understanding very central to the definition of harassment. Or if it’s severe.
I do think training is helpful in bringing these things to light so that it is easier to speak up and say no thanks. And generally I agree, if we can get people to say no thanks to a hug, that probably reduces the risks that they have other situations that are problematic.
But I worry about dynamics that have been going on for a while, that seem like just hugging but where someone is really uncomfortable and doesn’t feel safe saying something. Maybe it’s bc I rode with Rob and didn’t have problems and am now realizing I was lucky… my heart aches for those he did hurt and it’s opened my eyes to the widespread pain people are suffering silently.
Thats why a part of me wants to just blanket say NO TOUCHING like they do in Arrested Development 
so that it’s clear and unambiguous for the likes of men I’ve had to work with. But fundamentally I agree, hugs are not necessarily harassment.
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And you won’t lose video quality.
Or AirDrop if you’re both on iOS and AirDrop is OK with. MAAP. Also transmits with better quality.
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True.
But even when there are relatively easy ways around it, the point still stands that the MAAP policies as written do affect perfectly normal, healthy interactions in the process of trying to prevent inappropriate ones.
If it works to prevent abuse, it’s a worthwhile trade-off, but that still doesn’t mean it’s without downsides for those of us that aren’t abusers.
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Well the point that was argued was that it would be “burdensome”. I don’t really want videos of other riders on my phones. Asking the junior for their phone if they want their round videoed is less burdensome IMO than dealing with something on my phone and transferring it even without MAAP rules. I mean, my horse entered a show last weekend with a pro riding, and I asked a friend to video for me so I could watch more clearly. And she asked for my phone to use (we are both adults), and that was a normal chain of events.
I think part of the problem is that we dream up all these ways in which we are going to be totally burdened or inconvenienced, and that’s really not the case in reality.
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I’ve videoed a lot of rides, I have used my own phone or camera next to zero times. I am always using the rider’s phone/camera/tablet.
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I found a couple of aspects of Olivia Tamburro’s essay odd. She said that she cried for several days in a row in the counselor’s office at her high school, yet in response to that traumatic incident at her high school (not barn), she turned to two adult amateurs and her trainer, and after confiding in them, then had the courage to talk to her mother. While the adult amateur riders and trainer are presumably fine, supportive people, it is not appropriate for them to be usurping the role of the parents. It was not their place to advise her and talk her through it, beyond telling her to talk to her parents.
Second, on several occasions, she sets up the straw man argument “MAAP is prohibiting communication or interaction between adults and juniors”. That’s just not true. It is difficult for me to believe that she thinks it is true.
ETA: She also claimed that it was burdensome to include an adult if she is texting her trainer about her ride times?! No it’s not; two clicks and your Mom is copied on the message. Straw men everywhere.
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I am amazed at the people expressing doubt at the 17 year olds post of her feelings. I think it says a lot about where we are on some of these issues.
People have their own opinions on these issues. If yours does not mesh with theirs, even if you are a minor, you are a liar, nutjob, a fake person making something up, and you and people around you are ridiculed. I’m appalled at what I’ve read here today. When adults start ridiculing and dismissing a Junior Rider that has stood up and had the courage to tell how she feels; then people need to take a good look in the mirror.
As an aside, many good schools have Honor types programs for gifted students. It is not uncommon for Gifted children to have access to special opportunities, Math, Engineering, Music, Drama, English, many of these areas are covered.
The 17 year old girl is a real person. I hope she doesn’t read the rude, dismissive, comments. Some of the comments here today “ take the cake”. I can assure you that degrading this girl and her story is not going to get your platform to where you want to go.
FWIW. I remember telling adults whom I trusted things I could never tell my parents. Cmon people. I’ve had students confide things to me. Most of it dumb juvenile stuff but you try to give advice to kids to Do the Right Thing. I have on occasion gone to parents and disclosed information that I felt they should know. It’s not uncommon for a young person to talk to someone they trust who is not a parent. That’s just life. To discount this girl because “ she didn’t tell her parents” is ludicrous.
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She said “SafeSport training is important. ...However that does not mean there should be no interactions between juniors and adults.”
Do you think she believes that following either SafeSport or MAAP means that “there should be no interactions between juniors and adults”?
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I didn’t read any post as discounting her feelings. At the end of the day the OP ED was a tad dramatic and filled with questionable statements.
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I don’t discount her feelings. Her premise, that safesport prohibits interaction, isn’t true. Her example, that she wouldn’t have been able to reach out to other adults to talk about her problems under the new restrictions, isn’t true.
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Well. I see the Chronicle of the Horse in publishing this article is trying to present varying opinions. Please read back the last couple of pages and tell me that several posters( that post all the time) weren’t questioning this girls honesty. I didn’t say everyone.
If you cant see what I’m talking about; there are some major issues.
Very easy to say what someone else believes” is not true”. Opinions are like blank blank. We all have one. Yours is not necessarily better than anyone else’s including a totally contradictory view.
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Having an opinion on rules is not the same thing as not understanding the rules, or deliberately misrepresenting the rules.
That is what people are pointing out.
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Ok.
She is literally saying something that can easily be fact checked by looking at the MAAP policies and proven false. Maybe she believes what she’s saying, maybe she doesn’t. Who knows. But it’s not true.
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You really think that? What a small world those kids will have and they will have no experience evaluating different choices or understanding different perspectives.
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Ok. Go ahead and keep on telling all of us why the 17 year old is wrong in what she said in her article. Beat it down. “ She iswrong on what she said”.
She is 17. The Chronicle did an article on her not you all the Naysayers. Geez let it go for Craps sake. You just have to be right. That’s what this is all about regardless of who you hurt.
Ive said my peace. You don’t like it. Too Bad. Keep it up. Say some more. You are just exposing yourself.
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104 Pages of some just spewing hate. Then let one Child question things and she is Damned and branded “exxagerating “ basically a liar. I thought we were protecting our Youth??? There are some very disturbing trends in this thread… all 104 pages and I think true colors are shown at the end. I’m not ever going to say this is OK. No one should ever think this crap is OK.
I should also say there are few posters with multiple multiple posts. God forbid anyone posts something that doesn’t fit their agenda. Kudos to this 17 year old girl who has stood up regardless where f what anyone one dissing her thinks. Thank God. I pray there are more young people out there like her . There are already enough sheep in this country.
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^^^^ the above are examples of overreaction.
Also strawman arguments
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Ok. 🙄
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