Sell or Keep?

[Alter3]

I’m at a crossroads and need to make a decision. I bought a nice young hunter prospect over a year ago who is bred extremely well. Very quiet, great brain, gorgeous, easy to handle, etc. On the ground, I adore this horse. No prep at shows, never spooks, doesn’t look at the jumps. BUT, (of course there’s a but) this horse is a tricky and frustrating ride. Yes, I can get it around and ride it well, but I don’t necessarily enjoy it.

I had a lightbulb moment the other day when I had a lesson scheduled on my other horse but wires got crossed with his half-leaser and she had already ridden him. When I realized that, I looked at my other horse and thought “oh great, I have to ride you today instead”.

This horse will be a nice junior or ammy hunter so the other part of me says I need to be patient and keep riding through the green and frustrating moments because when we come out on the other side I’m going to have a super nice horse.

So, I’m torn. Am I being impatient or is this just not the best match and I’m trying to force it because I know how nice this horse is?

My trainer is the one who mentioned selling so I think she can tell how frustrated this is making me. She’s mentioned more than once that my horse isn’t always an ammy-ride and can be frustrating, so I appreciate her support.

Thoughts?

[SonnysMom]

Sell. This is supposed to be fun. The longer you keep her the more money you put into riding a horse you don’t enjoy. Sell her to somebody that will love the challenge. You should look forward to riding your horse at least the majority of the time. Who cares how talented they are if you don’t enjoy doing a very expensive hobby.

[Pokerface]

Hi Alter, I have definitely sold horses that weren’t my cup of tea, but were otherwise great. One was a bit of a scaredy cat and I got tired of holding his hand (hoof??) with every ride. My mom loved riding that one, but it drove me nuts. I sold others because they were just too unpredictable and could throw a mean buck.

What about his ride do you dislike? Conversely, what about the other horse’s ride do you enjoy? Do you think the parts you don’t enjoy will completely go away or are they just sort of part of who he is? My spooky horse was just timid and dependent by nature, it could be improved upon. but it was just who he was. The buckers probably could have been great horses for me, but I didn’t have a pro I could count on at the time and I was tired of getting hurt. One broke my hand in the first week of a new teaching job and I spent the first 6 weeks with my new students with my hand in a cast. I decided that, even if it was fixable, it wasn’t something I was prepared to fix and I’d rather have a horse that was greener, but more trust worthy.

[gertie06]

Sell. You’re an ammy. You do this for fun.

If you like projects, fine. I do too. But find a project you enjoy.

I just sold mine for the opposite reason. He was great to ride, but kind of an arse on the ground. I was tired of having to be a drill sergeant with him. Next!

[Alter3]

@Pokerface

Hi Alter, I have definitely sold horses that weren’t my cup of tea, but were otherwise great. One was a bit of a scaredy cat and I got tired of holding his hand (hoof??) with every ride. My mom loved riding that one, but it drove me nuts. I sold others because they were just too unpredictable and could throw a mean buck.

What about his ride do you dislike? Conversely, what about the other horse’s ride do you enjoy? Do you think the parts you don’t enjoy will completely go away or are they just sort of part of who he is? My spooky horse was just timid and dependent by nature, it could be improved upon. but it was just who he was. The buckers probably could have been great horses for me, but I didn’t have a pro I could count on at the time and I was tired of getting hurt. One broke my hand in the first week of a new teaching job and I spent the first 6 weeks with my new students with my hand in a cast. I decided that, even if it was fixable, it wasn’t something I was prepared to fix and I’d rather have a horse that was greener, but more trust worthy.

Most of what drives me nuts about the ride is part of this horse’s personality, I think. This horse is quiet and unreactive and very much a push ride. My other horse will take me and has a bit of a motor which I love. My other horse is super responsive, I put my leg on and he GOES. This horse takes it’s sweet time to do anything, which again, is part of it’s personality. If I get after it for a more prompt response, I get an edgy, tense horse or I get bucking. So, I have to be tactful and patient where as I would prefer a “yes ma’am” response. And this horse is a mare, so we get the added bonus of hormones and the uncertainty of what her attitude will be like any given day :lol:

[Alter3]

@SonnysMom

Sell. This is supposed to be fun. The longer you keep her the more money you put into riding a horse you don’t enjoy. Sell her to somebody that will love the challenge. You should look forward to riding your horse at least the majority of the time. Who cares how talented they are if you don’t enjoy doing a very expensive hobby.

I think this is part of where I’m torn. I DO like the challenge and I’m super competitive. So part of me feels like selling = giving up. Which is dumb, I know. I do LOVE the feeling on those days where everything comes together and we have a great ride. But, honestly, I think the frustrating rides outweigh the great ones at this point.

[blondewithchrome]

I have to agree. If you don’t like riding her, sell her. Unless you are reaaaaally interested in holding out to try and sell her for the most you can, (which is always a risk with horses - she could get hurt tomorrow!) - let her go to someone who likes the push ride (I love a horse I have to kick every stride, LOL). As an ammy myself, I wouldn’t want to spend my time and money on a horse I don’t love. This sport is too expensive for that!

[HJdaydream]

Sell. As a fellow ammy hunter rider that personality would drive me nuts too, but could potentially sell well to someone needing a horse that isn’t too sensitive. I am firmly in the camp that we spend way too much money on this hobby to not want to ride our horses. I KNOW what kind of ride I like at this point, and wouldn’t want to settle for a poor match.

[IPEsq]

I love that type lol! This doesn’t happen to be a tall black Oldenburg is it? Almost bought a mare like that over a year ago but passed for different reasons.

My point is, there are people who would enjoy this horse. And it sounds more like a personality thing than a green thing. If you are not one of them, it is fine to sell and get something more your type. You don’t have to keep her just because she’s a nice one. Find yourself a nice one that has more motor.

[Redlei44]

Sell. Start marketing her now, no need to rush or discount, she’ll sell to someone who loves that ride and you’ll be able to take the funds and find another project that you don’t know-key dread needing to ride. It’s supposed to be fun!

[Blinky]

The thing is, that part of her is not going to change. You will have to adjust your ride if you keep her. Can you? I like a horse that takes me while my friend loves a horse she has to push. But sometimes we also have to learn to ride what we have. If you decide to not, sounds like she will be liked for someone that wants that type of ride.

[Pokerface]

@Alter3

Most of what drives me nuts about the ride is part of this horse’s personality, I think. This horse is quiet and unreactive and very much a push ride. My other horse will take me and has a bit of a motor which I love. My other horse is super responsive, I put my leg on and he GOES. This horse takes it’s sweet time to do anything, which again, is part of it’s personality. If I get after it for a more prompt response, I get an edgy, tense horse or I get bucking. So, I have to be tactful and patient where as I would prefer a “yes ma’am” response. And this horse is a mare, so we get the added bonus of hormones and the uncertainty of what her attitude will be like any given day :lol:

Based on this, and literally EVERY other answer you’ve gotten, I think you have your answer! I personally would rather show and ride a horse I LOVE to ride, then to have the winner but that I don’t care to ride it daily. Additionally, mares tend to be all or nothing with their people, so if she finds a home that really loves her and “gets” her, she will shine and you can be a part of her story… without riding her :lol:.

Life is short, ride the horses you LOVE to ride.

[mmeqcenter]

Sell.
A horse being great in general doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a great horse for you.
This should be fun.

[BigMama1]

Life is short. Sell the horse for one you enjoy right now

[GoodTimes]

@Alter3

Most of what drives me nuts about the ride is part of this horse’s personality, I think. This horse is quiet and unreactive and very much a push ride. My other horse will take me and has a bit of a motor which I love. My other horse is super responsive, I put my leg on and he GOES. This horse takes it’s sweet time to do anything, which again, is part of it’s personality. If I get after it for a more prompt response, I get an edgy, tense horse or I get bucking. So, I have to be tactful and patient where as I would prefer a “yes ma’am” response. And this horse is a mare, so we get the added bonus of hormones and the uncertainty of what her attitude will be like any given day :lol:

I own the gelding version of this! :lol: I have a set of pictures framed on my wall from the same show. Photo 1 - Beautiful effort over a 3’6" oxer. Photo 2 - Leading the jog with a first place ribbon. Photo 3 - Monster rodeo buck after same oxer in the second trip (you can see in the picture that I’m laughing, I knew it was coming since I forgot to put his ear stuffies in).

If it’s not your type of ride then I would consider selling. How old is she?

Would you replace the horse? Would you be looking for another project or green horse? Would it take a toll on you if you ended up with another horse you didn’t love?
I’ve found that until a horse is 6 or 7 you don’t really know how they’ll end up.
My mom’s horse was a jittery mess from 4-6 then he settled and became the ultimate ammy safe push ride. My horse was super quiet from 3-4, then super spooky with a buck/spin at age 5. At 6 he settled a bit, but most would still consider him a pro ride.
Current 3yo is sensitive on the ground, but level headed u/s. Crossing fingers that she stays that way.

[TatteredDaydreamer]

Sell! This is supposed to be fun. I’m in a similar situation with my mare, except she’s 19 and I’m trying to decide when I should retire her. She can be very hot, sensitive and spooky. I actually prefer a ride that takes me more then a push ride, but I am beyond over the spookiness and I don’t enjoy the ride anymore. My plan is to send her to be retired in a few months, and look for a green, quiet, fun project!

[c0608524]

If it makes you feel better, remind yourself you’ve given the mare a fair shot. You’ve had her long enough to realize you aren’t going to grow into loving to ride her. Life is too short, riding is suppose to be enjoyable (especially as an ammy) and it is time to sell. It’s not throwing in the towel, it’s giving her the opportunity to find a new owner who loves the type of ride she is.

[summerfield]

I’ve reached an age when I now distinguish between what I CAN ride/deal with and what I WANT TO ride.

I’m not a professional, I have nothing to prove, and I’d rather spend my money having fun.

( I also hate push rides)

[Alter3]

@GoodTimes

I own the gelding version of this! :lol: I have a set of pictures framed on my wall from the same show. Photo 1 - Beautiful effort over a 3’6" oxer. Photo 2 - Leading the jog with a first place ribbon. Photo 3 - Monster rodeo buck after same oxer in the second trip (you can see in the picture that I’m laughing, I knew it was coming since I forgot to put his ear stuffies in).

If it’s not your type of ride then I would consider selling. How old is she?

Would you replace the horse? Would you be looking for another project or green horse? Would it take a toll on you if you ended up with another horse you didn’t love?
I’ve found that until a horse is 6 or 7 you don’t really know how they’ll end up.
My mom’s horse was a jittery mess from 4-6 then he settled and became the ultimate ammy safe push ride. My horse was super quiet from 3-4, then super spooky with a buck/spin at age 5. At 6 he settled a bit, but most would still consider him a pro ride.
Current 3yo is sensitive on the ground, but level headed u/s. Crossing fingers that she stays that way.

She just turned 7, and wasn’t started until 4 (almost 5) so was super green when I got her. She’s nice enough that I know I’ll have the budget for a made adult hunter, which is the route I’d rather go this time. I liked the idea of a project when I bought her since I was still competing my other horse, but now he’s about to retire so I’d rather buy something I can show right away rather than bring along.

I will say she taught me a TON and really taught me to ride the green, unmotivated type :lol: But, after putting it down in writing and then reading all of your responses, the answer is obvious - SELL. So thank you all for your thoughtful responses, that’s what I love about COTH, the ability to bounce these things off of several other smart equestrians

[OverandOnward]

Think ahead to the time when she is in a great new home with someone else. Will you feel happy and relieved? Or regretful? There’s your answer.