I am sure he would love nothing more than to be by her side and that it was a very tough decision.
Best wishes to both.
She was speaking and talking and improving, she probably told him to go. If I know horse people, insisted he go.
Best wishes for improvement and no more backslides!
I’m sure they had a discussion before this happened on how they wish the other to compete if they are lying in a hospital or whatever. Plus they have such a great support system, it wasn’t like she was lying there by herself.
[QUOTE=SevenDogs;7471030]
Seems to me like that was a strictly personal decision that he, and he alone, could make and he shouldn’t be judged by others who have zero knowledge of the details, nor the relationship. It is absolutely none of your business and really tacky to post your judgement on a BB.[/QUOTE]
No one ever posts their opinion or thoughts on this BB :rolleyes:
Considering how much medical information has been posted on EN and the Chronicle, I wouldn’t say any of us have ‘zero knowledge’ of what’s going on.
Any brain trauma is serious, and her’s was not your average concussion. Saying that he, and he alone, made the decision seems pretty selfish to me. That’s his spouse, and they seem to be a pretty incredible team (which I’ve always admired). I guess it’s abnormal for me to think he’d want to be by her side in case anything happened. Would you go to work if it were your spouse that had an accident?? If you were an owner to one of those horses would you have had a problem if he scratched??
Seems to me it’s an exception to the rule because its a well admired upper level rider…
[QUOTE=fordtraktor;7471090]
She was speaking and talking and improving, she probably told him to go. If I know horse people, insisted he go.
Best wishes for improvement and no more backslides![/QUOTE]
Maybe we didn’t read the same article, but the one I read said she was having difficulty with speech and mobility on one side. It also stated she thought it was 1988.
Considering Sunday’s update, she clearly wasn’t out of the woods.
I sure hope we get news of vast improvement soon.
[QUOTE=SevenDogs;7471030]
Seems to me like that was a strictly personal decision that he, and he alone, could make and he shouldn’t be judged by others who have zero knowledge of the details, nor the relationship. It is absolutely none of your business and really tacky to post your judgement on a BB.[/QUOTE]
This.
Just because you know what you would want your SO to do in this, and what you would do for your SO does not mean that this is what others would do.
In Boyd and Silva’s case, I’m sure that as elite riders, they have discussed this exact scenario before. Honestly, it was probably more in the likelihood that Boyd was hurt at an event, what should Silva do, but I very much surmise there was a discussion and mutual agreement. I cannot imagine that Boyd would leave her side unless there truly had been such a conversation.
In any case, I think it rude and uncalled for to judge personal choices made by other couples when situations such as this arise.
GAEventer, if I were in that situation, stable and able to talk, I would tell my husband to go to work.
Why? Because I don’t think it would benefit either one of us for him to be sitting there with me sending good juju. However, it would benefit us for him to keep making a living so that hopefully, we’d be able to pay off some of the medical expenses.
JMHO. And also JMHO, I think it’s deplorable that people are judging what Mr. Martin does in wake of this accident. Everyone deals with things in different ways. My best wishes to him, Silva, and their connections.
[QUOTE=GAEventer;7471188]
No one ever posts their opinion or thoughts on this BB :rolleyes:
Considering how much medical information has been posted on EN and the Chronicle, I wouldn’t say any of us have ‘zero knowledge’ of what’s going on.
Any brain trauma is serious, and her’s was not your average concussion. Saying that he, and he alone, made the decision seems pretty selfish to me. That’s his spouse, and they seem to be a pretty incredible team (which I’ve always admired). I guess it’s abnormal for me to think he’d want to be by her side in case anything happened. Would you go to work if it were your spouse that had an accident?? If you were an owner to one of those horses would you have had a problem if he scratched??
Seems to me it’s an exception to the rule because its a well admired upper level rider…[/QUOTE]
Everyone is entitled to their opinions. I know them both. In my opinion, he made the right choice for them. Her best friends were there…and MUCH better company than Boyd would be. Not everyone is good sitting by a hospital bed. Everyone one is different…she wasn’t left alone. It isn’t a measure of someones love and loyalty that they sit at the hospital. His job is his job. There are certain critical events this time of year…I understand why he chose to compete–I’m also sure that his owners would have backed him what ever he had decided.
This isn’t his hobby… He was in constant contact with those by her side…and I’m sure she was on his mind the entire time.
Today I have the option of staying by my spouse’s or family member’s side for a period of time thanks to corporate insurance and family friendly policies. However when my parents owned and ran a resturant, everyday we were closed was lost income. Much like most ULR’s of any discipline. They earn money by competing and training horses. The better they do, the option opportunities they have for horses/owners and students. Add to that this is a World Championship year so being a team member adds to the long term luster as a trainer.
IMO - they probably made a decision at some point of time that either would continue to compete should the other be injured. Especially at such short notice.
I have spoken with Boyd on a few occasions, most recently at a USET fund raiser. There we compared ankle injuries/surgeries. My opinion of him is that he is a “good soul”, one of the highest compliements my late father would give anyone.
[QUOTE=bornfreenowexpensive;7471247]
This isn’t his hobby… He was in constant contact with those by her side…and I’m sure she was on his mind the entire time.[/QUOTE]
This, and the fact that she’s going to require a lot of expensive rehabilitative therapy and someone’s got to pay those bills as insurance will not cover everything. The costs could be astronomical. They are not in an industry where you can take family leave and still have income unfortunately. So unless there is a trust fund or a lot of family money to fall back on, he did the right thing.
[QUOTE=GAEventer;7471188]
No one ever posts their opinion or thoughts on this BB :rolleyes:
Considering how much medical information has been posted on EN and the Chronicle, I wouldn’t say any of us have ‘zero knowledge’ of what’s going on.
Any brain trauma is serious, and her’s was not your average concussion. Saying that he, and he alone, made the decision seems pretty selfish to me. That’s his spouse, and they seem to be a pretty incredible team (which I’ve always admired). I guess it’s abnormal for me to think he’d want to be by her side in case anything happened. Would you go to work if it were your spouse that had an accident?? If you were an owner to one of those horses would you have had a problem if he scratched??
Seems to me it’s an exception to the rule because its a well admired upper level rider…[/QUOTE]
I run a farm. I had a pretty big calamity in my life about 18 months ago. I had just adopted my son from Russia and 8 weeks after getting home with him my father died very unexpectedly. The day after he died my husband, who runs the farm with me, was hurt and out of commission for almost 4 months. So I had a brand new baby, a dead father, a seriously grieving mother whom I was basically forcing food into on a daily basis, and a husband having surgery and then totally out of commission for almost 4 months. How many days of working on the farm did I miss during this? 1.5 days.
I missed 1 day for my husband’s surgery and .5 day for my dad’s funeral. The day after my father died (to whom I was VERY close and lived practically next door to) I was holding horses for the farrier for several hours. After I was done with that I went with my mom to help make funeral arrangements. I can assure you that as sympathetic as my clients were/are, they weren’t interested in excuses about any little thing in regards to horse care being overlooked. That’s the way it is in the horse world and don’t ever kid yourself that it isn’t. My husband was largely on his own during the day and unable to do much for himself but he totally got it that I had to run the farm, not nurse him 24/7. I completely understand and respect Boyd’s decision and might have very well made the exact same one myself. I love my husband dearly but someone has to make a living and run the farm and it would be WHAT HE WOULD WANT me to do. It would also be what I would want him to do. Him sitting around waiting on me to live or die isn’t really going to change an outcome either way, but I realize not everyone sees the world that way.
[QUOTE=GAEventer;7471188]
No one ever posts their opinion or thoughts on this BB :rolleyes:
Considering how much medical information has been posted on EN and the Chronicle, I wouldn’t say any of us have ‘zero knowledge’ of what’s going on.
Any brain trauma is serious, and her’s was not your average concussion. Saying that he, and he alone, made the decision seems pretty selfish to me. That’s his spouse, and they seem to be a pretty incredible team (which I’ve always admired). I guess it’s abnormal for me to think he’d want to be by her side in case anything happened. Would you go to work if it were your spouse that had an accident?? If you were an owner to one of those horses would you have had a problem if he scratched??
Seems to me it’s an exception to the rule because its a well admired upper level rider…[/QUOTE]
I have never met Boyd or Silva, and assure you that I am the last person to have upper rider stars in my eyes.
I do believe individuals make much more informed and appropriate decisions for themselves and their families, than someone that has zero first hand knowledge of the situation and no clue as to inner workings of a married couple’s relationship. Sorry, GAeventer but reading third hand news on the Internet doesn’t entitle someone to post snarky judgements, particularly when the stakes are this high.
Perhaps you should keep your eyes on your own paper, and hope that if you need to make a difficult decision in your personal life, someone isn’t judging you based upon what they read on the Internet. :rolleyes:
Neuro units and ICUs usually have strict visiting policies. Even when visitors are allowed 24/7, there’s usually a limit on numbers, like a max of two.
A patient with a recent brain injury needs (1) rest and (2) a lack of stimulation. No noise, no lights, etc. The doctors will discuss this with the family, and you’ll plan your day accordingly. Even if you’re determined to sit there all day, you might be out in the hall by the elevators for long stretches while tests are run and patient care is completed.
This is real life, not sleeping beauty. There’s not much anyone can do, and if you’re the one taking the night shift, having something to focus on during the day can make it easier on you in terms of letting time pass, which is the best thing you can do for your loved one.
Horses are therapy, let’s not forget that.
Thank you, JER, for being the voice of reason.
GAeventer, you are a jerk. While it may not have been what you would do, until you are in the exact situation and have all the necessary information to make the decisions Boyd did, you probably shouldn’t sit in judgement.
Years ago, I went trail riding (with my cell phone) while my husband was in brain surgery. Our neighbor was one of the Recovery Room nurses and she kept me posted. I was there with him when he woke up, but the trail ride sure helped keep me calm for the hours when I could not have done anything anyway.
[QUOTE=GAEventer;7471193]
Maybe we didn’t read the same article, but the one I read said she was having difficulty with speech and mobility on one side. It also stated she thought it was 1988.
.[/QUOTE]
She did not think it was 1988. That is Boyd’s idea of a joke–and they printed it. She wasn’t out of the woods…and has a LONG way to go…but you absolutely can not EVER believe everything that Boyd says in an interview. The fact that he did joke…was actually a good thing for people who know him. If Boyd still has his sense of humor…that is good. Like many of us, horses help us cope, but also humor does as well. Of course many also rolled their eyes because unless you know him…you also know how people who don’t know him would take that statement seriously.
Everyone is entitled to their opinion but decent people don’t trash others in their time of need.
[QUOTE=wanderlust;7471533]
Thank you, JER, for being the voice of reason.
GAeventer, you are a jerk. While it may not have been what you would do, until you are in the exact situation and have all the necessary information to make the decisions Boyd did, you probably shouldn’t sit in judgement.[/QUOTE]
Really wanderlust? Grow Up.
I find interesting that had this been a different situation, say a professional’s reaction/treatment of an equine, there would be many people saying that they were disappointed in how he/she handled the situation. I’m allowed to have an opinion, I didn’t say ugly hateful things, just that I was surprised in how the situation was handled, especially considering the brevity of it. And yes, it did change my perspective on this rider, I’m permitted to think that.
Perhaps I have a more conservative view because I HAVE been in this situation; a serious brain injury no less. I sat/slept/ate in the ICU for three days, and you’d better believe I was grateful that I was there, because my family member did not come out alive.
I have also nonchalantly gone about my normal day when another family member went in for a ‘routine hospital procedure’; I was not there to be with my family when the doctor came out to say he didn’t make it. Do you think you won’t regret that?
This wasn’t a week or five days post accident, this was 24 hours later, and in a different city. You expect me to believe you all would go back to your everyday job within 24 hours of a serious injury? Or that working for those few days is going to make or break the bank?
Not in the mood to get into it, but I do disagree with GAeventer, but even then I see his/her point.
My fiancé and I both work in the racing industry, with the horses. I figure I’ll be the one to be hurt, I ride a lot of horses and I am not a great rider unfortunately. While we work for others, we do have a few of our own. It takes months, sometimes years for us to get one, “ready”, then pick a race, etc. By race day, we have a LOT tied up in these horses, and while we both have “real” jobs with other stables, the money we stand to make would be VERY helpful.
So if I were in Silva’s shoes, and my fiancé had a horse in a race the next day, and I’d already seen him, I would want him to go run the horse. He could be back that evening or the next day depending on the location, and I’d be so heavily medicated and sorroubded by other friends that I doubt it would bother me too much. I’d sure be happy later on if he, like Boyd, won.
While I’m a second class professional, nothing of the Martins’ caliber, I do understand the reasoning behind Boyd’s decision. I respect him for it, I can’t imagine how difficult and nerve-wracking that must have been, but I’ll bet you now he is glad he did it. It paid off.
Continued jingles!
