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Spin-off from riding rules, one more list:

These apply to all sexes:

—"Virologists have identified a new Nile virus - type C. It appears to target those who were born before 1950

Symptoms:

  1. Causes you to send the same message twice.
  2. Causes you to send a blank message
  3. Causes you to send a message to the wrong person.
  4. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you.
  5. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment.
  6. Causes you to hit SEND before you’ve finished.
  7. Causes you to hit DELETE instead of SEND.
  8. Causes you to SEND when you should DELETE.

It is called the C-NILE virus!

And if you can’t admit to doing the above, you’ve obviously caught the mutated strain —

The D-NILE virus."—

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