Sports Psychologist and/or Materials Recs

[evntr95]

Looking for recommendations for sports psychology books, materials, and possibly even sessions for a self-defeating 30-something AA. Who happens to not have a lot of disposable income left over after the horses eat it all.

I could always use more bravery, but I’m not the type who is terrified of cross rails. But I do make dumb mistakes. It’s like I’m riding along, going “wow, this is going well!” and bam, I do something and suddenly it’s not.

I feel like I do everything “right”- I have athletic, intelligent horses and I take lessons with good people. In my heart, I feel like I’m a good rider. But I hate going to shows and feeling uncompetitive and like we aren’t on our A-game. I love showing, but it’s getting harder to find it fun when you’re a competitive natured person and finish every weekend in the bottom of the pack.

I really think I need some sort of professional help, but would really appreciate guidance and recommendations on where to turn. Thanks in advance!

[terasa]

I keep recommending Annika McGivern to everyone - I found her to be really understanding and helpful. She’s got a fair bit of free resources and recommending reading on her website. You can also book a one on one zoom call that I felt was well worth the money, I still refer back to the notes I took during the consult before every clinic and show.

[RAyers]

I worked with a local sport psychologist decades ago to help me after a series of bad crashes in competitions. I never read any books or such but I did practice (and still do) meditation and visualization techniques.

One thing I would ask is, “What are your goals?” “Why do you even want to compete?” “What do you consider your ‘A’ game?” You need to be clear in your motivations and intent.

As I have gotten older, I still have the goals of upper levels on a horse I develop from ground up. And I am working to that. But my goals aren’t I HAVE to win. Hell, I don’t even have to place to gain the satisfaction and fun of competing. If my horse comes off course better and more confident than he started, and I can say, “He is ready to move up,” it is a win for me. I love hanging with my decades old friends from all over the US, sharing the experience and talking horses for a weekend. I love hacking out and just soaking in the competition while testing my training/horsemanship.

The caveat here is I am old school anachronistic in my idea that jumping and competition doesn’t start until 1.10 meters and preliminary level. Thus, I don’t really look at ribbons at Training and lower as a measure of competitivness. It is more a measure of dressage. Therefore, I may not be of help without knowing your specific circumstances.

Almost 2 decades ago I was always in the middle or bottom of the pack, but I also was competing against, Karen O’Conner, Kim Severson, Darrin Chacchia, Bruce Davidson, Mike Huber, Hawley Bennett,… I realized I was never going to beat them on their horses, but I was in the game! And if we looked at just XC, I was competitive. As my trainer at the time said, “If Rolex was only XC and Stadium, I would send Reed now.” Thus, I learned to find other places to judge myself and abilities.

[Saskatoonian]

Brain Training for Riders. Andrea Waldo has evented for ages at all levels and has a real knack for sports psych (as she should, as she’s a psychologist herself). She does individual work and her book is great.

Good luck!

[Scribbler]

I really like @RAyers perspective on how the competition is just one moment out of a much larger framework of horsemanship, and how that sustains someone who has gotten quite far up in the competition world. You can’t let your entire sense of self worth rest on how you do in 2 minutes of competition.

In dressage, the mantra is that you are really competing against yourself not the other folks. Because who enters is the luck of the draw. You could be scoring say 65 consistently and that could get you a ribbon at one less well attended show, or nothing if a handful of folks with bigger moving horses turn up. But scoring 68 with no ribbon is in fact a better marker of progress than scoring 63 and getting first place because there were only 3 people in your class and one of them spooked and knocked over the judge’s booth. I do know a low level coach who figured out the most under subscribed classes at a particular show, and put her students in there so they got ribbons despite being kind of awful.

Anyhow if you are panicking on course, which it sounds like you are, I’d suggest dropping down a level and riding without feeling you have to prove anything. Simplify the question.

I think in all sports learning how to lose is just as important as learning how to win which is why it’s said to build character in children. Someone is always going to be better than you and someone is always going to be worse than you. Sports is an artificial highly stylized competition where everyone does exactly the same thing at roughly the same competency level, and the winner is better that day by an incremental amount. It’s a game, because there is always an element of luck and chance. I recall reading the results on one of the kiddie shows where my trainer at the time had taken her juniors. I could see that over the course of the day, the same horse/rider combinations swapped places quite dramatically in very similar classes. They could win one class and be out of the ribbons in another - and ribbons went to 7th place IIRC! I assume a rail or refusal. Whereas dressage scores for a given horse/rider combo tend on average to be more stable over a season, but whether you get a ribbon depends on who else enters.

[Jealoushe]

Two great books to check out:

Ride Big by John Haime
Bolder Braver Brighter by Daniel Steward. He also just talked about this on the Dressage Radio Podcast.

Horse and Hound also did a series over the spring months with a sports psychologist and he gave advice for a piece for a month or two worth of episodes. Definitely check those out too.

If you are truly working very hard and with coaches and not finding success over time, it might be worth trying some new coaches.

[Joan_from_Flatlands]

Another vote for Andrea Waldo and her book Brain Training for Riders. Her clinics are amazing!!

[luvmycabanaboy2]

The rideIQ inStride podcast isn’t sports psychology per se (except this weeks with Natalie Hummel), but Sinead talks to the guests often about their inner struggles, how they overcome them, etc. Many of the top riders have someone they talk to and they mention them by name during the episodes. Highly recommend a listen!

[Willesdon]

Agree with @Scribbler and @RAyers that Eventing, as a three phase activity, is a framework or a process, a work in progress. It is not about “winning” because it is just so dam*ed difficult. We ask the same horse to do well in three very different disciplines let alone include the rider’s own skills and mind set. The top riders are focused on consistency, winning by small increments. They educate their horses carefully, plan a season to build up to a particular competition and so will have many runs with no intention of going out to win. The incremental gains are improved dressage scores, a happy horse increasingly confident at a level or stadium rounds that have fewer poles down. Then, at the planned Big Event, there is the chance of winning on that elusive Dressage Score only.

One aspect of Eventing that I particularly love is that the horses are not expected to be machines. I like that competitors support each other because everyone knows there are as likely to be disappointments, even disasters, as there are wonderful days. I like the focus on improvement and learning.

This past weekend, I watched the leading horse in a 2* international have a pole down on the final fence and thereby dropping to 8th place. If asked, I suspect the rider would say “Pity, but the experience was fantastic and didn’t my horse do well!”

So my suggestion, in addition to the good advice already offered, is to consider what it is about eventing that appeals to OP, what it is s/he wishes to achieve and then to shift mental focus from “winning” on to “progressing” and having fun.

[starsandsun]

Another suggestion for your consideration is “How Emotions are Made” by Lisa Feldman Barrett.

I am a psychologist, and this book has been so empowering for my clients. Once you can understand why your brain behaves the way it does, I find it opens so many doors to consider the world in a different way, and allow you to modulate your emotional responses differently.

[gardenie]

The Brave Athlete: Calm the F*ck Down and Rise to the Occasion: Marshall PhD, Simon, Paterson, Lesley: 9781937715731: Amazon.com: Books Written for triathletes primarily but was so fun to listen to and get an understanding of many things competititon.

[spotnnotfarm]

Listen to the podcast Building the Championship Mindset with Dr Amber Selking. It is free and Fantastic! She is a sports psychologist and explains the reasons we think and feel the way we do. Everyone I recommended her to has loved her! She helped me so much!

[Herbaceous]

I have found “It’s Not Just About the Ribbons” by Jane Savoie to be quite useful. Full of good techniques you can use both on and off the horse.

I’ve also worked with a cognitive-behavioural therapist which has been helpful. My therapist knows absolutely nothing about horses, but the techniques are still useful and I find that having someone who isn’t horsey can actually bring a new, fresh perspective.

I don’t compete, but I do deal with some pretty severe fear/anxiety issues that were really holding me back, and I’ve found both of these to be helpful. Best of luck!

[173north]

I love Inside Your Ride by Tonya Johnson. I also second the recommendation of the In Stride podcast… not really about sports psychology but it’s discussed in some way almost every week. Ride iQ also has a bunch of sports psychology lessons/podcasts from Ashley Johnson in the app, though I haven’t explored it much.