Stop it with the "heart horse" thing. No, really. Stop it.

[AmarachAcres]

To me this is one of those situations where over use has spoiled the original meaning. Much like how playing “Let it go” 1k times an hour on the radio turned a beautiful song into an annoyance for many people.

I’ve had my gelding for 17 years. I love him dearly. I’m under no illusion that he would run up and stomp a snake to death for me, but I do see a relationship there. Others see it to. ANYONE can ride him and have a good time. But he’s Better For Me. And it’s not the 17 years, He was like that from the beginning, that is why I bought him.

His owner boarded him at the stable I was a student worker at. Eventually I and 3 other kids were allowed to ride him. Eventually, total truth here, I was the only one allowed to ride him. Though we all groomed him the same and rode him the same, I was the only one he didn’t try to swipe off on a fence or lay down on.

He did it to the others repeatedly. For whatever reason, he made a connection with me. 3 years later I saved up enough money to buy him from an owner who never rode him any more because they didn’t get along.

So I do believe horses can connect and become a heart horse. You can chose to use a different phrase if that one sours you, and no, horses will never be dogs.

But I also believe they can bond and be special, and I don’t think that is so bad.

Those who over use it and apply incorrectly are the problem.

My husband’s horse is a sweet heart, I love him, but we have no connection. He does a job for me if I ride and likes nuzzles. But if my husband or daughter walks out there? He’s at the gate nickering at them to come pet him NOW. He’s their heart horse. Buddy, bonded companion. Whatever.

But no, a foal you met 5 minutes ago is not a heart horse. The rescue you saw across a field isn’t. The show horse you just have to have from a picture on dreamhorse.com isn’t. At least, not yet. Sometimes you go through quite a few before you find it.

Maybe some of you just didn’t find that one yet. I’m sorry.

[Gnalli]

[QUOTE=french fry;7764227]
I can’t even articulate how many face palms the phrase “heart horse” inspires in me. Particularly since it’s almost always used to imbue extra emphasis on the specialness of your situation or lend credence to a terrible decision, i.e. “I’m eating cat food and racking up credit card debt to pay for my heart horse, but it’s all worth it because (rainbow sparkly heart emojis) HEART HORSE.” Or, “My trainer said he’s going to kill me one day but I won’t give up on him because (insert Black Stallion fantasy emoji here) HE’S MY HEART HORSE.”

“Well, that (terrible decision I made) was different because he was my heart horse.”

Just stop it. We humans have a pretty unlimited capacity for love. There will be another one and you will love him/her. Otherwise, what’s the point of being in horses at all?

Mean old hag of COTH, over and out![/QUOTE]

You and I agree on just about nothing, but you nailed it with this one. I so agree with you. Some horses are more special to us than others, but that term is so story book. When I was a young girl, and got all misty eyed over something, my usually indulgent daddy would look at me and tell me “that is just storybook stuff, not real. These animals are livestock, and are to be treated as such. They come AFTER people.” This from the man who moved us into lesser quality houses because the property had a much better barn or pasture than we were in at the moment…lol.

[AzulBlue]

I’ve been around horses my whole life, and in that time I have personally witnessed 2 human/horse bonds that were incredible, to say the very least.

[AmarachAcres]

Look, I totally agree with that. I believe whole heartedly we can love, truly love, more than one of any given thing.

Perhaps part of the misconception here is some fallacy that a heart horse is the ONLY horse.

I truly hope my new mare, that I’m training up now will become connected with me like my gelding. I love her but it’s taken much longer to earn her trust. I won’t sell her, but as of yet we don’t have that connection, but if we do, great!

When King dies, it will crush me, but I won’t get a mentality of not being able to connect with any other horse.

And as you said, if I die, I want my husband to find that next special person. I know he would never settle for any one who didn’t love him and our kids with all her heart, just as I wouldn’t, so I have no doubt she would be special.

[QUOTE=french fry;7764384]
Slight tangent: I don’t believe in soulmates either so this one is going over my head, sorry!

It all just seems very limiting. I love my SO and can’t imagine my life without him but in the event that something does happen to him and I would have to carry on without him, it is statistically likely that I would find someone else. It is even more statistically likely that he would find someone else if something happened to me!

I don’t want my SO to be miserable and pine for me for the rest of his life if something happens to me. That’s just such a bizarre line of thinking in my world.

In the same vein, I can’t imagine being like, “Welp. That was it. I will never love another horse the way I loved my heart horse. I guess it’s all downhill from here!”

/unpopular opinion[/QUOTE]

[LoriW]

Ok mean old COTH hag - I will agree with you that “heart horse” is a bit of a simpy term and I, while admittedly, do fall in love instantly with every animal I have ever owned, be it dog, cat [well not every cat] and now my horse, my horse has grabbed hold of me like no other. So while the term itself can be a bit distasteful, the scentiment behind it, well, not so much…

[AmarachAcres]

I’m conflicted on this one. It’s a GREAT thing to ground our kids in reality. But there is beauty in seeing animals as more than just livestock.

You don’t have to believe in a heart horse, and of course your human family comes first. But let me tell you, true friends understand the importance of riding time. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t drop everything to run to them in need and we sure dedicate time to those relationships. I still have a special horse, and there is nothing wrong with that.

[QUOTE=Gnalli;7764403]
You and I agree on just about nothing, but you nailed it with this one. I so agree with you. Some horses are more special to us than others, but that term is so story book. When I was a young girl, and got all misty eyed over something, my usually indulgent daddy would look at me and tell me “that is just storybook stuff, not real. These animals are livestock, and are to be treated as such. They come AFTER people.” This from the man who moved us into lesser quality houses because the property had a much better barn or pasture than we were in at the moment…lol.[/QUOTE]

[Mara]

[QUOTE=HungarianHippo;7764306]
Amen.
I was sick of it already but decided I had enough when a COTHer described a yearling that she had just met as her heart horse. And therefore just HAD to buy it despite not being prepared from a training expertise or safe stabling standpoint. Upon hearing that pavlovian Heart Horse signal, legions of COTHers nodded and smilied and encouraged. As I said at the time, with inflation what it is, and given my need to identify my love for my horse as more special than yours, I am the owner of a Central Nervous System horse.[/QUOTE]

How about a Spleen horse? Kidney horse? And lots of people have Appendix horses.

[Alagirl]

[QUOTE=Mara;7764430]
And lots of people have Appendix horses.[/QUOTE]

:lol:

but nobody seems to have a brain horse…so I will be in search of that!

[Coanteen]

[QUOTE=Frivian;7764314]
Lol, maybe I’ve never had a heart horse, but I don’t get it. I love my horse. I want to own him for his whole life. I have had other horses. He’s my favorite one out of all the ones I’ve ridden… but “heart horse”? I don’t even know what that means.[/QUOTE]

It’s just a phrase to…say more or less what you said there. So to you he’s your favorite horse, to someone else he’d be a “heart horse.”

It’s like some people use “furkid” or say their animals are like their kids (usually dogs, haven’t seen that much with horses). Some people will simply be predisposed to using phrases like that, while others are predisposed to hate that cutesy-poo.
And some of it is COTH culture. “Heart horse” is accepted, and probably people who would never call their favorite horse “heart horse” irl do so on COTH, because they know it conveys a certain meaning here. Same with “jingles”, which, again, I think is a stupid cutesy-poo COTH expression, but whatever, it’s part of the forum’s “culture” as it were.

[goodhors]

I feel the term, heart horse, is SO over used as to make anyone using sound like they are using the “latest slang” in describing their animal. EVERYONE who has horses, owns their “heart horse”!!

I have been privileged to own some REALLY GREAT horses that were so much fun to ride and use. They were also affectionate, enjoyed their work, and we had a lot of years together, so they could “almost read my mind”. They get more perfect as the years pass!!

But there are some other VERY nice horses in my barn, we are just developing our working relationships, to get back up to that closeness I enjoyed with the others. Each horse will be special and wonderful in it’s own way, as we develop our partnership over the years.

But I don’t do sappy sentimental with my horses, they are my good friends. Not dragging them down into the “cutesy” level of tiny dogs by calling them sappy names. You have to be WAY BETTER than just OK at our farm, to be a GOOD HORSE, a team player.

The GOOD ones for us, don’t ever get sold. Glad we can do that. And rather than chance my beloved horse falling into poor ownership, I care enough that I would put them down if I can’t manage to care for them anymore. Seen too many end up in bad places once they left the “loving hands” of owner.

[katyb]

[QUOTE=mortgagemyhorse;7764321]
WTF is a heart horse? A horse you love more than the others? Like a heart boyfriend?[/QUOTE]

One would presume that you only have one boyfriend. I have several horses, all special to me, but one is my partner/heart horse. She is different. Our bond is different. When we were trying to lease our pony, just about all the people who came to see the pony offered to buy this horse. I told them I’d be as likely to sell them my kid (no, I’m not selling the kid. Neither will I ever part with Jet. Absolutely, entirely won’t. Yes, I’m lucky enough that nothing financial will happen to force that sort of decision.). I don’t love them all the same, although I certainly do love all of them. My mom calls Jet, “Katy in a horse suit”. We are just a complete and perfect match. I call her a heart horse. I don’t really care who that annoys.

[spacytracy]

The great thing is, we all get to have our own relationships as they fit into our own lives and personalities.

I’m not much of a gooey sappy person, but I have a heart horse. I’ve bonded with him like no other horse. I do not use my “heart horsiness” to treat him like a special little snowflake who can do no wrong, however. But it is nice to have a horse that you just “get” and that seemingly “gets” you.

When he passes, sure, there may be another that I would consider a “heart” horse. But they have big shoes to fill.

It only annoys me when said heart horse walks on water and can do no wrong.

[King_s_Ransom]

Sometimes I think a “heart horse” is just the horse that comes into your life when you really need a “heart horse.” Other times, I am certain that they are absolutely a gift from God and you are incredibly blessed to recognize that.

Not everyone is a romantic. Not everyone is spiritual. And certainly not everyone has faith in a God who would send you a gift just when you need it most.

I have no gripe with the non-romantics in this world. They are the ones who keep the bridges from falling down. Yay them!

I, on the other hand, am an incurable romantic and hope that you will have no gripe with me either, especially since I am not responsible for bridges!

It takes all kinds to make the world go around (and keep the bridges from collapsing).

I had a heart horse. He saved my life, both literally and symbolically. He was wicked smart and just different from every other horse I’ve known, owned or loved. I love them all – that’s why I don’t go to auctions. But King was different. You don’t have to believe it or understand it, but I hope you won’t scorn me for it.

I am a responsible person who pays my bills, runs a company, employs dozens of other people who get paid a living wage, get paid on time, and also get health, dental and life insurance, paid vacations, holidays and sick time.

But I had a heart horse. Thank God, because King came into my life at my darkest hour and turned everything around. I often say he pulled my sorry arse out of a very dark place. He made me laugh, he took me over fences and with him I could fly.

Hopeless Romantic Here.

Miss. him. every. day.

[AmarachAcres]

King’s Ransom, since we both have special horses named King, you get extra props.

Of course, they are Kings, they would expect nothing less.

[skykingismybaby1]

[QUOTE=AmarachAcres;7764462]
King’s Ransom, since we both have special horses named King, you get extra props.

Of course, they are Kings, they would expect nothing less.[/QUOTE]

Ahem!!

Skyking 21 yo Dutch Arab cross pinto.

[prairiewind2]

[QUOTE=Laurierace;7764310]
I feel sorry for those of you who have never had one. I have been blessed to have two in my lifetime. No need to be bitter just because you are sitting on the outside however, there is still hope for you.[/QUOTE]

Perfectly said! Absolutely I do feel sad for those poor folks who haven’t had the experience. Trying to explain it to them, though, is like trying to describe color to a blind man.

[mortgagemyhorse]

[QUOTE=katyb;7764451]
One would presume that you only have one boyfriend. I have several horses, all special to me, but one is my partner/heart horse. She is different. Our bond is different. When we were trying to lease our pony, just about all the people who came to see the pony offered to buy this horse. I told them I’d be as likely to sell them my kid (no, I’m not selling the kid. Neither will I ever part with Jet. Absolutely, entirely won’t. Yes, I’m lucky enough that nothing financial will happen to force that sort of decision.). I don’t love them all the same, although I certainly do love all of them. My mom calls Jet, “Katy in a horse suit”. We are just a complete and perfect match. I call her a heart horse. I don’t really care who that annoys.[/QUOTE]

So boyfriend comparion is like a soulmate: of all the boyfriends I have had, this one is my soulmate and he feels the same way? (I don’t know if I believe in a soulmate or not, ask me in 10 years, just the best word I could find)

No callousness to my posts, just simply trying to understand it. Remember: I am the person who didn’t know what a CarrotStick was and has never met a Parelli Follower. The rock I live under is vast.

So question for anyone: on some posts people note financial problems where a person pays for, say, a vet because it’s their heart horse and are now only able to eat Ramen. Is this part of the heart horse definition or something that can come with it?

[HungarianHippo]

[QUOTE=Laurierace;7764310]
I feel sorry for those of you who have never had one. I have been blessed to have two in my lifetime. No need to be bitter just because you are sitting on the outside however, there is still hope for you.[/QUOTE]

DINGDINGDINGDING! And there it is: “heart horse” is not about you distinguishing internally your own love among your own horses. It’s about you judging that you love yours more than I love mine. That said, I do sincerely appreciate your prayers and hope for my salvation.
Gotta run, I have some puppies to kick.

[AmarachAcres]

[QUOTE=skykingismybaby1;7764481]
Ahem!!

Skyking 21 yo Dutch Arab cross pinto.[/QUOTE]

Of course, of course! Welcome to the King club!

[prairiewind2]

[QUOTE=HungarianHippo;7764484]
DINGDINGDINGDING! And there it is: “heart horse” is not about you distinguishing internally your own love among your own horses. It’s about you judging that you love yours more than I love mine. That said, I do sincerely appreciate your prayers and hope for my salvation.
Gotta run, I have some puppies to kick.[/QUOTE]

Huh? It’s the other posters who are saying there is no such thing as a heart horse who are doing the judging. In fact, this thread was started with that thought in mind.

???