Again, just running the VIN alone won’t tell OP if the vehicle has these added on after the fact…
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The only thing you can possibly add later on is a transmission cooler - and maybe a higher rated hitch. This poster isn’t going to getting into re-gearing the rear end, helper springs etc. if she’s not comfortable and can return the vehicle then she should do so.
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Is it possible it has the HD tow package and a light duty hitch?
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My GM manual for a 2008 3500HD has a chart that clearly states the maximum weights, including the GCVWR, that are permitted. Each line on the chart is specific to the engine, differential, and a couple of other things (it’s in the truck down at the barn and I’m still drinking my morning coffee ;)). In my case it’s 22,500 lbs. (if memory serves). After I deduct the curb weight of the vehicle as set up for towing (7900 lb. including a full regular and auxiliary fuel tank) that means my maximum towing weight is 14,600 lbs. I have no idea what GM claimed this beast could tow and I really don’t care. That’s my legal limit.
So my Manual IS set up for the specifics of a vehicle and I think that’s the law for all the manufacturers. My Volvo, not ever to be a tow vehicle for anything, has a similar chart.
To use the chart you have to KNOW what the vehicle configuration is. That appears to be the central question. I was under the impression that the VIN gave more information on that than it does. This means you’ll have to go back to Ford and find out, by giving them the VIN, what the original configuration was. Use that and you should find what you’re looking for in the manual. If not, then ask Ford what the number is. It is a legal limit and if you get stopped by a “weight watcher” on the highway THEY will know what that number is 'cause Ford had to set one.
Sounds like sending the car back might be a good idea as it seems that it’s not going to do what you want it to do. Armed with the above information when you back to shopping you’ll know what questions to ask and where to find the answers. If you do this you will be among the most informed of buyers because few know that this is what they should be doing. I certainly did NOT know this when I bought my first truck and, fortunately, Fate neither smiled nor frowned on me!!! 
Good luck as you look for your next vehicle.
G.
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While I would normally agree with you, the GWVR which makes up part of the GWCVR, is regularly manipulated by manufacturers in order to avoid registration/tax requirements. There are GVWR packages that you can choose on a Ford pickup which change absolutely nothing about the truck except the sticker on the door. It is identical to the higher gvwr truck, just labeled differently. Yes, I guess if you get a “weight watcher” you might be in trouble or might not (since someone buying an expedition is not likely to be hailing a 10k lb trailer…) but the actual trucks are equally capable.
CarMax officially took it back and handed me a check for the truck I traded in, so that part was fairly painless. They did end up double checking me, and yup, Standard tow package. They have a mechanic who worked for Ford apparently and told them I was dead right and that vehicle won’t suit.
So, back to the drawing board. Waiting for a taxi to come pick me up so I can get on with my day.
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Also, for future readers, the Ford mechanic said you need to call Ford for a VIN look up to know what the manufacturer put on the vehicle. (Obviously not helpful with ad ons post manufacturing.) Sticker on the frame doesn’t help.
Sorry for all the hassle and stress OP! It really does suck. Stick with a truck for hauling horses though IMO. 
What a hassle! Best wishes getting the right one the second time around!
I agree on the truck preference but it’s not feasible. My HOA doesn’t let residents park trucks in the neighborhood. After 3 years of parking on random streets, I just mentally broke after yet another struggle with finding safe parking big enough to fit a truck. Bye bye truck. Meant to keep you until you went to the car park in the sky but it wasn’t meant to be.
Unfortunately not in a place in my life where I can sell my home and move to the farm of my dreams, so it’s got to be an SUV.
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The Expedition is built on the F-150 platform. So other than not being able to haul a gooseneck…and perhaps a full truck-bed load of hay…the Expedition will haul a horse trailer just as well as the F-150.
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Well, maybe, but the number in the book is the legal limit and if you exceed it and have a mishap you will be on the hook. If your defense is “the number was manipulated for tax purposes” you’ll have to take on one of America’s larger corporations who employ a battalion of lawyers just for things like this! After all if you do, in fact, prove your thesis the maker will be on the hook for defrauding all 50 states and D of C. They will do all kinds of stuff to prevent that outcome.
But your thesis is that massive fraud is common I’m not sure that there is evidence to support it. That being the case I’ll stay “within the lines.”
G.
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It’s not a theory. The 9,900 gwvr weight package on the F series trucks includes a different door sticker. It is not a different vehicle than the 10,000 or 12,000 gwvr truck it just has a different sticker on it that reduces its weight rating so the truck is not considered a commercial vehicle. All three trucks can physically tow the same weight safely. It’s just a sticker for legal reasons.
You’re not allowed to own a truck where you live!?
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There are places in America where your HOA can/will dictate you can’t park your own personal vehicle overnight in front of your own home because it’s a truck. I did not know this was a thing until my neighbors informed me on the day after I moved in and only then did I learn they meant all trucks, not just the work vehicles. Learn from my mistakes.
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That sounds so crazy to me. What is their rationale on that one?
Look at Chevrolet’s. The Suburban and Tahoe can be bought with a towing package.
Power trip by the leadership or cowardice in the face of a loud, obnoxious resident who doesn’t like trucks?
HOAs are the work of the Devil and the people who run them make the North Korean leadership look like devotees of Mother Theresa. Over the top? Maybe, but not by much.
G.
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The joy of being an HOA is you don’t need a rationale. Once it’s in the covenant and that home owner signs it, you’ve got 'em. I actually looked at fighting it and getting it changed because our HOA rules are 4 decades old. Basically not going to happen.
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Not gonna lie, new adulthood-goal became gather money and move to country where I can post a No Trespassing sign and be left alone.
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