The Sport We Love

[axl]

OP, you keep saying you’ve been used by people. That’s a red flag for me. If you lease a green horse and put hours and mileage on it, and the owners then raise the lease price or decide to ride it themselves, that’s not using you. That is exactly the transaction you agreed to, with the owner taking the risk that you won’t screw up their greenies.

If you are a barn rat working and trying to scrounge lessons/riding time, that’s not being used either, unless you don’t ever get to ride.

I’m not even clear on why you felt used by the therapeutic riding center. Volunteer work is umm, volunteer and work.

Riding a difficult pony for a kid who just wanted to show might have screwed up your riding, but those folks weren’t using you either. You wanted riding time, they had a pony that needed to be ridden.

What strikes me about all your posts is that you’ve had a lot of the chances that kids search for when they have limited funds. I don’t know how well you’ve learned to ride from them, but I know you’ve learned to think of every person who gave you an opportunity as a “user” if they got anything out of the good they did you.

I think you have a terrible attitude and I’m glad you won’t be taking your frustration out on a nice horse. You have a comeback for every helpful thing people have said on here, so just take your excuses into a different sandbox.

And since I’ve already said more than normal for me, I’ll say this too: get a job. Any job. It will teach you a lot more than sitting at home and letting Daddy pay your bills while you feel sorry for yourself because you can’t afford a made horse. There are a whole bunch of crappy jobs out there that will give you a little income and self-respect while you wait for the good opportunity to open up.

[walktheline]

OP, to some degree, I know how you feel. Let me tell you my situation.
I am a junior. My horse is 20. In his hayday, he was capable of the 1.30m, but that was before I even started riding him. Now that he is aged, his limit is 1.15m. The Children’s jumpers. I have 2 1/2 junior years left and I am already completing at 1.10-1.15m on him. I have accepted wholly that I will never go any higher on him. If I drilled him, made him as fit as I possibly could, schooled the crap out of him and then rode my pants off in the show ring, whacking him at the base of every fence, would he go around 1.20m? Maybe so, because he has heart and he wants to please me. But he would be uncomfortable, and it would be asking far too much.
I’m definitely not Tori Colvin either, but I do have a natural feel and eye (so I’ve been told). Sometimes, yes, it is very difficult for me to watch the kids who don’t necessarily have a lot of natural talent, but do have money, get these beautiful imported junior jumpers to take them higher- higher than I will ever go, most likely. Some days I shed a few tears over it in pure frustration, maybe after a bad lesson (my horse is a very difficult ride) or show.
But then I have to remind myself that I’m pretty damn lucky to come as far as I have. Many kids DREAM of owning a horse, even just a little pre childrens packer, let alone one that can jump 3’6. I may not be able to afford to show every weekend and go to finals, but there’s so many kids out there who DREAM of going to one horse show a year and never do. I may not be at the top of the sport, I may not be showing at the height I would really like to be, but I am still more fortunate than so many children in this sport.
I am extremely competitive by nature, so yes when I came to terms with not being able to show any higher than 1.15m it was a hard pill to swallow at first. And to this day it is hard for me to really think about sometimes. But moping around- and in your case, quitting, is a guaranteed way to NEVER get anywhere. Will I ever show at 1.25m? Most likely not, but you never know. One thing I know for sure is that if I ever got there, it would not come without hours of hard work, so instead of moping around having a pity party I’m working hard every day to improve. So, OP, what I think it comes down to is HOW dedicated to this sport are you? How much do you love it? Yesterday was my horse’s day off. I didn’t ride. But I went to the barn from 10-4 anyway and spent a half hour just sitting in his stall grooming him and watching him eat hay. Because I love the barn. And I love these creatures called horses.
If its more about showing for you, or ribbons or if you just don’t love the sport that much anymore, you probably should quit. But if you really, really love the sport and the animals, keep riding even if you’re only jumping 2’6. I know I would.

[CaitlinandTheBay]

Not to continually feed a thread that’s going nowhere, but:

I think it’s important to continually remind ourselves, particularly when we’re young, that riding is a lifelong sport. I am so inspired by the posters on here who are a bit older who HAVE made it- have the dream horse/barn/job/etc. It’s pretty easy when you’re in your early 20s to think “I’ll never have ______.” but the truth is, life is long. Just because everything isn’t the dream right now doesn’t mean it never will be.

So thank you everyone who’s told their story on this. I, for one, sm newly inspired.

[PonyPenny]

Height “itis” is a disease that many young riders have, especially those with limited funds. Instead of being grateful for what she gets to do on her parents dime, she whines about how she is so limited on a public bulletin board. I have a good friend with MS and sometimes she can barely get out of bed. She is grateful for everyday she can even get on a horse. How high she jumps never even comes into the picture.

[woodhillsmanhattan]

[QUOTE=CaitlinandTheBay;7550588]
Not to continually feed a thread that’s going nowhere, but:

I think it’s important to continually remind ourselves, particularly when we’re young, that riding is a lifelong sport. I am so inspired by the posters on here who are a bit older who HAVE made it- have the dream horse/barn/job/etc. It’s pretty easy when you’re in your early 20s to think “I’ll never have ______.” but the truth is, life is long. Just because everything isn’t the dream right now doesn’t mean it never will be.

So thank you everyone who’s told their story on this. I, for one, sm newly inspired.[/QUOTE]

What’s even more inspiring is those that post on COTH that are “more mature” and haven’t “made it”. They simply enjoy and love what they are doing. And I often learn the most from their posts in regards to horsemanship, approaching things from a different view point, etc.

[Carol_Ames]

I hear you hunter eq blonde; unfortunately as I get older and have more and more time to sit / lie down and think; I realize that what you say is true.simply owning and caring for a horse, even doing it all the care , buying feed and hay plus stall rental is VERY EXPENSIVE; actually, being onthe circuit can become physically tiring to both horse and rider; What I have been told, I SHOULD HAVE DONE was to "attach myself to a BNT/ BNR?, and ride "on their coattails; with hindsight it makes sense; apprentice yourself to them; do whatever you se needs doing, nailing up fence rails, holding horses at the in gate, setting jumps in the warmup; pcking up rocks in the ringpulling manes. cleaning sheaths;cleaning tack

learn how to teach" up downers," kids and, especially adult amateurs; you may find a horse and the support you are seeking; unfortunately, at some point we must "wake up and “smell the coffee”

Let’s face it, life is unfair, we are born into whatever family, class, income group we are in so sad too bad:winkgrin: because others have more, is no reason to give up; calculate the $ you need toshow at a lower level, probably with no prize money,; then find a way to earn that money; if you have office skills/ experiencethere are trainers who need heklp witheir gusinessses in that way; bookeeping and graphic design on computers can be VERY marketable skills; how about grooming for one of the "haves you see; it is possible to lean A LOT from the groundYou also hear how the "BIG GUNS in the industry sell/ market themselves, their their horses andsometimes their riders

[Claudius]

OP…find some one like ME!!

I need someone good to show my horses. I have ALWAYS needed someone better than myself, but could not afford the professionals!! SO I did it myself, love it, rode and sold horses I got off the track and prospered. Now my horses are so much better than I am…find someone like me and you will have a win win situation!! And if you LOVE it, as you say you do, don’t charge them!!!

[huntr_eq_blonde]

[QUOTE=Carol Ames;7550677]
What I have been told, I SHOULD HAVE DONE was to "attach myself to a BNT/ BNR?, and ride "on their coattails; with hindsight it makes sense; apprentice yourself to them; do whatever you se needs doing, nailing up fence rails, holding horses at the in gate, setting jumps in the warmup; pcking up rocks in the ringpulling manes. cleaning sheaths;cleaning tack

learn how to teach" up downers," kids and, especially adult amateurs; you may find a horse and the support you are seeking; unfortunately, at some point we must "wake up and “smell the coffee”

Let’s face it, life is unfair, we are born into whatever family, class, income group we are in so sad too bad:winkgrin: because others have more, is no reason to give up; calculate the $ you need toshow at a lower level, probably with no prize money,; then find a way to earn that money; if you have office skills/ experiencethere are trainers who need heklp witheir gusinessses in that way; bookeeping and graphic design on computers can be VERY marketable skills; how about grooming for one of the "haves you see; it is possible to lean A LOT from the groundYou also hear how the "BIG GUNS in the industry sell/ market themselves, their their horses andsometimes their riders[/QUOTE]

Unfortunately, BNT have professional grooms, professional riders, and assistant trainers. I would love to teach little kids, but that goes to the trainers who already work at the barn. Cleaning tack (which I weirdly happen to love), grooming horses, or assisting at shows is done by the paid, hired grooms of the barns. Any barn work, like painting poles/fences, etc. is done by people already on the books at a place a BNT would operate. And quite frankly, I would expect nothing less if I was a person who boarded and paid $$ to be in a program like that.

It’s all great advice, and I’d be more than happy to do it, but in the wealthy area that I ride in, it’s not a reality…everything is full-service.

And again, I don’t care about showing. I just want to progress to a higher level.

[largo]

Uh… I think you would find that if you look, many of the grooms are actually paid with lessons or some kind of credit. Just sayin…

[huntr_eq_blonde]

I know of the struggles of MS. I have Fibromyalgia (among many medical problems) and was diagnosed and overcame Chronic Fatigue Syndrome when I was 15. In a matter of two weeks, I went from jumping 3’ courses to just going to the barn, hugging the horse, and walking around for 10 minutes during my lesson before I was utterly exhausted. Don’t say that I am ungrateful. You don’t know my medical struggles.

Now that I overcame CFS and learned a ton in the last 7 years of riding since then, I don’t think I am being a whiner and complainer because I want to progress. Doesn’t everyone want to progress? (And don’t say they don’t, because that isn’t true.) However, due to financial circumstances and the level of riding that I am at, I chose to quit riding.

[huntr_eq_blonde]

[QUOTE=largo;7550745]
Uh… I think you would find that if you look, many of the grooms are actually paid with lessons or some kind of credit. Just sayin…[/QUOTE]

Um, not to be politically incorrect, but the grooms in Northern Illinois are all of Hispanic decent and are hired. They aren’t kids trying to work off lessons, board, etc. This may be the case in other areas, but not in mine.

[Laurierace]

Everyone does not want to progress, many are happy with what they are currently doing. Anyone who defines progress solely by height has some major holes in their training in my opinion however.

[huntr_eq_blonde]

[QUOTE=axl;7550527]
OP, you keep saying you’ve been used by people. That’s a red flag for me. If you lease a green horse and put hours and mileage on it, and the owners then raise the lease price or decide to ride it themselves, that’s not using you. That is exactly the transaction you agreed to, with the owner taking the risk that you won’t screw up their greenies.

I’m not even clear on why you felt used by the therapeutic riding center. Volunteer work is umm, volunteer and work.

Riding a difficult pony for a kid who just wanted to show might have screwed up your riding, but those folks weren’t using you either. You wanted riding time, they had a pony that needed to be ridden.

And since I’ve already said more than normal for me, I’ll say this too: get a job. Any job. It will teach you a lot more than sitting at home and letting Daddy pay your bills while you feel sorry for yourself because you can’t afford a made horse. There are a whole bunch of crappy jobs out there that will give you a little income and self-respect while you wait for the good opportunity to open up.[/QUOTE]

It’s like arguing with a Democrat. I can explain until I’m blue in the face, but for the majority, it doesn’t sink in.

Just want to clear up a few things, and I’m done with this. (Another reason why I quit is because horse people are so hypocritical.)

I didn’t ask to ride that one naughty pony…I was perfectly fine riding the less-than-stellar school horses. I was brand new to jumping, and my parents and I were beyond naïve. The trainer took advantage of that and put me on a bad, out-of-shape pony to make it better for the other little girl who owned it, as apparently she didn’t want to put in the time or effort herself. We were paying for lessons…paying customers. These owners got the benefit of me riding that horse. If that isn’t being used, I don’t know what is.

As for the first of the two horses I leased, again, my parents and I were totally naïve to leasing and what it all entailed. Horse people, at least the ones I’ve dealt with, are business people who take advantage of you to get your money. This horse was totally unsuitable for me and what I could handle health-wise at the time (as I had been still suffering from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.) Yet, that didn’t stop the barn owners or the trainer (their son) from encouraging the lease. We later learned that the trainer had never thought it was a good idea for me to lease this horse and that he hated it. It had also been in training with him and his brother, who was short-listed for the 2002 WEG, years ago and was an impossible training prospect for either of them. If that isn’t being used, I don’t know what is.

As far as the volunteering, the director and I were friends. However, that is a personal issue that I am not going to explain.

And lastly, as I’ve said before, I can’t get a job. I’ve tried. My medical problems and constant doctor’s appointments are too much of a hindrance. People are going to hire workers who can show up consistently, not ask for any time off if a doctor’s appointment or if a medical issues flares up, etc. You know how the economy is right now and how older, more experienced people hang on to jobs that are beneath their skill set. Be realistic.

[Claudius]

Ya’ know…I think we have all been duped…I think this OP is full of it…but it has been a nice lively exchange of ideas. None of which fit OP;s agenda…there is no “try” here…duped I think, all of us!!! A point to notice, my area is too fancy for me to do menial jobs…what planet is she from??? At WEF, and there ain’t no fancier venue in this country, free help is utilized, effort is recognized, REAL triers are given a chance. Be a working student for heavens sake!!!

[Laurierace]

How exactly does someone who is brand new to jumping make a pony better?

[huntr_eq_blonde]

[QUOTE=Laurierace;7550756]
Everyone does not want to progress, many are happy with what they are currently doing. Anyone who defines progress solely by height has some major holes in their training in my opinion however.[/QUOTE]

To me, the goal in life is to always better yourself. Always challenge yourself. Saying everyone doesn’t want to progress seems like you are a complacent person. I’m not. If that works for others, hats off to them.

Am I a dressage master, no. However, as another poster and I mentioned, dressage or eventing takes the same amount of money. You will run into the same problem financially at some point.

[vxf111]

I am really sorry for your problems. They do sound serious. But you will realize one day that you’re not the only one with problems. It’s not a competition.

You will also realize one day that no one ever catches up with the Joneses. Someone will always have more money, more talent, more opportunities.

There is so much to love and learn about horses. There are things you can learn from the most basic green horses, from flatwork lessons, from just being at the barn and watching people who have more experience than you. Measuring your progress by holes on a standard is only one way to measure your growth. If you truly love the sport, and not just the accolades and ribbons, maybe one day you’ll realize that.

I wish you a lot of luck. I hope you look back on this thread in 3 months and 3 years and shake your head with the benefit of maturity. There’s so much to be thankful for, to learn from, and to take joy from. You’re missing out because of YOU and not for any other reason. No one’s life is perfect, we all have things that impede us whether they be health, money, time, location, etc. Only you can choose to make what you can of the cards you’re dealt or not.

[Laurierace]

[QUOTE=huntr_eq_blonde;7550802]
To me, the goal in life is to always better yourself. Always challenge yourself. Saying everyone doesn’t want to progress seems like you are a complacent person. I’m not. If that works for others, hats off to them.

Am I a dressage master, no. However, as another poster and I mentioned, dressage or eventing takes the same amount of money. You will run into the same problem financially at some point.[/QUOTE]

I thought I was bitter. Now I am complacent? Maybe the psychic network is hiring. Or maybe the FBI’s profiling division?

[huntr_eq_blonde]

[QUOTE=Laurierace;7550800]
How exactly does someone who is brand new to jumping make a pony better?[/QUOTE]

By getting it in shape through regular riding lessons. By no means am I fooling myself into thinking that I trained that pony up. But I did get it in shape.

[vxf111]

It’s not all about height.

Set up last year’s medal test and ride it as groundpoles or crossrails. Until you can execute it PERFECTLY on 3 different horses, you have something to learn and can grow/develop.

Read a 1st level test and practice each component until you can do it perfectly 9 times out of 10. Then go ride the actual test. Anything that wasn’t foot perfect, next ride work on it until you can do it 9 times out of 10. Then try the test again. Do this until you can do 3 perfect tests in a row.

Learn every kind of wrapping, braiding, and clipping technique. Practice for free until you’re so good people are begging to pay you for it.

These are all things you should be able to do on any sound horse. Green or ungreen. Fancy or unfancy. And if the horse isn’t quite there… learn to do it and get the horse there in the process. You don’t need a 4’0 jumper to “advance.” You need to take off the jumper goggles and realize there’s a whole library of knowledge out there.