oh geeze Louise, I just broke out in a nasty sweat and threw up a little. No, I do not want to be that girl. Changed the title from Heart Horse to THAT horse.
I think that when you “click” with a difficult/quirkie horse you just get more satisfied/feeling of accomplishment than when you can get along with a super easy/“anyone can ride horse”!! I like the challenge of a quirkie horse…and I never share him with other riders once I figure him out!!
[QUOTE=Winding Down;8249733]
oh geeze Louise, I just broke out in a nasty sweat and threw up a little. No, I do not want to be that girl. Changed the title from Heart Horse to THAT horse.[/QUOTE]
:lol:
Sorry, did not mean to imply in any way that that is your situation! Just some insight into why the term “heart horse” can be cringe-inducing to some people!
As I said, I can absolutely relate to having “that horse” that for whatever reason is extra special.
I am not sure what it is, but I am glad you are following your gut and not what others are telling you!
7 years ago I had a choice of my mare or her half-sister. I never could put my finger on why, but I picked my mare even though the other horse would have been a better fit height/build wise. My mare is a bit quirky/spooky and the other mare was not… I guess I just get to join the crazy club!
FWIW, I don’t let other people ride her except my instructor although if I had a friend at my riding level I would let them. She is good on the ground for everyone but while good most of the time under saddle can spin/spook at the drop of the hat… I am still surprised I stayed on a couple of those!
My all time THAT horse was my former pony club partner; 14.1 hands of Boston Mac QH who very much had opinions about everything, but was smart (and tolerant) enough to go along with teenage me’s crazy whims without killing us both. He hated being retired, so he went out on free lease to “raise” little pony clubbers until he passed away last year at 27. I could quite literally write a book about that little guy.
Currently, my THAT horse is the 23 year old OTTB lesson horse who, until about a year ago, was working full time as an outrider/pony horse. He was apparently quite good at it, but lack of turnout at the track made him a bit of a bear, and so he was brought home.
He’s a handful even at his age, hotter than a two-dollar pistol, and a cranky old man, but if I had my way I’d never ride anyone else. We feed off each other, so he’s teaching me to manage my anxiety and let go. Even in his hottest moments, he never gets stupid; he’s just wicked smart and seems to enjoy testing me. When I can keep myself together, he’s an absolute dream- the kind of ride that keeps you hooked and trying to have again and again.
[QUOTE=frugalannie;8248773]
Bfne, I’m surprised you don’t believe in “heart horses” if what we mean by “heart horse” is the one that you’ll ride even when you feel dog rotten, the one that you’ll pick when you have really limited time and can only get on one, the one that you save for last as a reward for having ridden the others ;).
Objectively, I think that they perhaps are the ones that challenge us in some way so that the rewards when things work are even greater. And they may understand our particular body language better than the other horses so that when we develop a partnership (even for fleeting seconds during a ride) it feels different, special, or as Willem used to say “This it be right.”
Wish I could bottle it![/QUOTE]
i just find the term odd. I have been a professional groom (years ago) and had horses for more than 30 years. I currently own 15+ horses some I’ve brought into this world and others I’ve known their entire lives. Yes there are some that will not ever be for sale. I have some who can hear my voice and come running and others run the other direction (because they want to stay out). But I care for all of them.
I have a connection with each. Some I click with better riding…some I click with more on the ground. Some I enjoy more than others but I enjoy and care about them all. Some are more significant in what they have given me but I just don’t believe in calling one a heart horse…they all have a place in my heart. Why some are never for sale is for various reasons…and my connection is only part of the reason.
I think it really is just a personal thing. And perhaps when you own as many as I do and have it is just different.
but as for THAT horse and the connection…why you get the feeling and decide this one is a keeper is really rarely for logical reasons.
Bfne, I quite understand. I use the term (only on CoTH) because it’s shorthand for a deep connection with a particular animal and a partnership that would take too many words to describe.
I’ve always said that all of my horses are for sale: however prices change on a daily basis. While you might (rarely) get one for a piece of bubblegum and a plug nickel on some days, there are those that the price stays up in the high six figures ;).
Life is short. Keep the one you like better.
One thing I love about CoTh is the unsolicited advice. I had decided to sell my mare before posting and the advise to do so has just convinced me even more that this decision is the right one.
I also love hearing about others’ experiences with THAT horse and how often our emotions defy logic.
That being said, I have known too many people who have hung onto a horse that is not right for them, that does not bring them happiness, and that has in the end, led to their losing interest in the sport or even in horses. I hate it when I see that happening. What is it that keeps people bonded to a horse and in a relationship with that horse that is detrimental to both their own as well as the horse’s well-being? I have been “the person” who tells someone that they should move on, way too many times, and I hate being the messenger. Yet I feel compelled to step in…
And sometimes I have been wrong.
FWIW Ditto WD --but heart horses can be heart breakers–and I think sometimes the “easy” horses are under appreciated—unitl they are gone. (But I love mares also!)
I will fully admit that I didn’t believe in “heart horses” for the longest time. And it took me about 6 years into owning Lad before I realized that he was my heart horse. Odd but true. So he’s staying, but to that end right now he’s leased out and showing a 14 yr old girl the ropes. All good.
So when I bought Gin this year I did so for all the normal reasons; buy huge grey fancy horse with good brain and sell, make money. After the second ride I announced to my new husband… “So remember how we were going to sell the grey and make a mint? Yea no. He’s a keeper. Never for sale now.” All credit given to John he didn’t divorce me or rip all his (remaining) hair out. He mostly gets it. And moreso with every new thing that Gin does well.
That said I adore my other 2 horses. I love them and enjoy every minute with them. But I see them being fabulous horses who can teach ammy’s or kids all about the world and bring them ribbons in the process. Lad was always quirkky so I could never really say that there was a person who I would trust with him until he cleared 12 yrs old. Then he finally calmed down. And Gin is the 'horse of a lifetime. If the universe is going to be foolish enough to hand me a horse that nice I am gonna damn sure keep it and enjoy the ride.
But this mentally grew from fighting with and keeping MANY inappropriate horses over the years. I think for some it’s just the path you end up on. But given where all that stubborness dissipated and led to much better horse buying decisions years later… I’m ok with it.
~Emily
oh yes, there is definitely such a thing as a heart horse. A heart horse is the one you’ll go farther with than on anything else because you trust each other. It is just like your husband. Pick the heart horse, not the arranged marriage!
[QUOTE=BeHooved;8250979]
oA heart horse is the one you’ll go farther with than on anything else because you trust each other. [/QUOTE]
This and it’s not always the quirky one that you can really trust I’ve found. Like some others have said, the easy ones are often underappreciated but trust me, get a bit older and you will learn to appreciate this more and more. The ground gets harder; your reaction time slows; you just want to enjoy your rides more and be challenged by your horse less. I have had many, many horses in my 48 years but I’ve only had/have THAT ONE horse who just does it for me and he’s not quirky or complicated. I’ve had that and have no interest in having it again, no matter how talented.
[QUOTE=Winding Down;8250852]
One thing I love about CoTh is the unsolicited advice. I had decided to sell my mare before posting and the advise to do so has just convinced me even more that this decision is the right one.
I also love hearing about others’ experiences with THAT horse and how often our emotions defy logic.
That being said, I have known too many people who have hung onto a horse that is not right for them, that does not bring them happiness, and that has in the end, led to their losing interest in the sport or even in horses. I hate it when I see that happening. What is it that keeps people bonded to a horse and in a relationship with that horse that is detrimental to both their own as well as the horse’s well-being? I have been “the person” who tells someone that they should move on, way too many times, and I hate being the messenger. Yet I feel compelled to step in…
And sometimes I have been wrong.[/QUOTE]
This was the point I hit with Vernon, who I ADORED. I had a very special connection with him and loved him to itty bitty pieces, but we drove each other mad. It was a heartbreaking decision, and I still miss him (I would buy him back in a second if that ever came up), but we were both better off not being together at that point in our lives. Selling him led me to Toby, who may have put me on the ground more than Vernon and is often a source of frustration to the point of just having to laugh (you honesty can not deal with him if you do not have a very good sense of humor). But he is special to me beyond measure. Even compared to Neigh. Along with Stella, and not counting my sister and BFF, he is the being on this planet that I connect with on a totally different level than anyone else. He’s a keeper.
I think for me it’s more of a continuum than a 2-category system, but I definitely believe we have varying amounts of riding/friendship chemistry with different horses.
[QUOTE=yellowbritches;8251069]
Along with Stella, and not counting my sister and BFF, he is the being on this planet that I connect with on a totally different level than anyone else. He’s a keeper.[/QUOTE]
:tickled_pink:
I was in a similar situation where I had two horses that I adored but had to sell one. I kept THAT horse. The horse I sold was an incredible jumper, so bold and honest and just the sweetest thing on the ground. He would most definitely become my upper level horse. But I kept the cranky if not mean guy because we just have a special connection. This one is just as incredible jumper and maybe a little better mover but he is nowhere near as bold and honest. Not to mention he is very injury prone to the point that I have been sidelined now for a second season in a row. But when I come to the barn to spend quality time grooming him and he nibbles softly on my back in return I cannot imagine keeping anyone else.
I love my other horse too and I think about him every day. But I feel better knowing that because he is such an honest guy and solid citizen he will likely be no trouble for his new owner and have a long term quality home.
I’ve always been one who loves my horses dearly but they were always for sale if the right price came along. Then I bought a funny little draftX pony who looks like a shrunken Clydesdale I was going to clip and flip as a hunter pony as I had done many times before. I can’t even explain what was different when she got out of the trailer…I had bought her sight unseen. She was adorable but so had been all the other ponies. Something just clicked…instantly. I knew that day I would never part with her. She turned out to be the sweetest, most affectionate, hard-working, will do absolutely anything for me pony in the world. I had planned on using the money I got for her to buy a nice Warmblood for an upper level dressage prospect for myself to finally get my medal on. Even though she is in NO WAY built to be a dressage horse and naturally moves like a draft pony her big ass heart has her doing things I’ve only dreamed of. She floats when she moves now, just got us our first Bronze level score at First Level her first time at a rated show, and turns heads everywhere she goes with her “fabulous suspended gaits!” (This makes me laugh because she has the worst natural trot EVER) She took me to my first event when she had been under saddle for only 3 months and went clean XC and stadium to land us in third place! She had only ever jumped twice before that but she just said “Ok mom! If you say so!” She never says no, will try her heart out for me so hard it seriously makes me teary from time to time and she will get us to FEI dressage without question. So, even though I’ve had offers on her now that could easily buy me an uber fancy warmblood that this stuff comes naturally to I wouldn’t sell her for any amount of money in the world. I laugh when I ride, have a pony who recognizes my car and literally gallops along the road chasing me screaming when I come and go and insists on having me snuggle her head for 5 minutes before we can begin our day. And then she goes out there with her short neck, downhill confirmation and beats the crap out of the warmbloods I once dreamed of simply because she’s got a bigger heart then all of them combined. So I say stay with the horse that will work harder for you and try for you because that will beat out talent any day.
[QUOTE=IronwoodFarm;8249114]
Life is too short for all this agonizing. Sell the horse you don’t like as much and move on. It sounds like the mare will be much easier to sell anyway.[/QUOTE]
No agony here. I feel fortunate to have to choose between two horses I really like.
So all, I have decided to hang onto my mare longer and move her up the levels, unless someone comes along and makes me an great offer. She will not be on the market anytime soon. The awesome thing is that I have two horses who I think are great and they take totally different rides. So there are no dull moments…
Gelding would be easier to sell - he is a cadillac to ride and is bred out the whazoo for sport. Mare takes more balance to ride and her breeding is not great close up.
